Chapter Sixteen

CRACK!

Hobbes took a sharp inhale of breath, as the rock he leaped on top of slid down the mountain for three feet.

Four feet. Several feet.

Hobbes leaped off the boulder as it rolled down the mountain, and smashed into another boulder a few feet away.

The impact sent a shockwave throughout the mountain, and caused Calvin, Hobbes, and the raptors all to collapse.

Worse still, Hobbes had cracked his helmet, leaping off the boulder, and now he couldn't see well.

Suddenly, the four noticed a rumbling.

Calvin, Hobbes, and the two raptors looked up.

Oops.

Rocks were tumbling down off the mountain. No they were boulders.

Huge boulders collided with other boulders, and soon, a genuine rock slide started to take form.

Hobbes ripped his helmet off, threw it away, and started running off away from the rock slide. Calvin followed. So did the raptors.

The raptors tore past Calvin and Hobbes, no longer taking interest in them, and leaped and jumped off the rocks.

Calvin and Hobbes were left behind.

Calvin and Hobbes couldn't leap like raptors, so they watched, helplessly, as the raptors escaped.

Calvin looked behind his shoulder.

YIKES!

He turned back around, and started running faster. Jumping over rocks, and boulders.

The rocks began closing in. Calvin and Hobbes couldn't escape it.

Suddenly, and at the worst of times, Calvin and Hobbes collided with each other.

They bounced off each other, and... gulp... fell to the ground.

Hobbes fell into a gap between two rocks, and Calvin and the MTM were pelted into a hole in the rocks.

Pretty convenient, huh?

However, when Calvin fell in, he... YIKES! Took a pretty nasty blow to the MTM on a rock.

The MTM made a beep sound as it crashed into the rock, then Calvin fell into the hole with it.

BOOM! CRASH! BANG! FOOM! CREEEEESH! ZEEEK! ZOOOOK!

Calvin and Hobbes covered their ears as the rock slide collapsed on top of them.

Then, silence.

Calvin opened one eye.

Then he opened the other.

Hmmm.

He appeared to be trapped underneath a... well, a solid wall of rock.

Calvin kicked at the rock in front of him... No good.

Then he tried calling for Hobbes.

"HOBBES! HO-O-O-O-HOBBES! DO YOU HEAR ME!"

Calvin waited for a reply.

It came. As a moan.

"OOOH! THE PAIN!"

"How ya doing, pal!" Calvin called.

"Terrible!" Hobbes screamed. "I can't feel my left back leg. I think it's cut off."

"Holy smokes!" Calvin yelled. "do you see any blood?"

"Well, I see dirt, rocks, and pebbles."

"I know, but blood, do you see any blood? If your leg had been cut off you would notice some blood."

"How much?"

"I'm not sure. A quart? A gallon?"

"I don't see that much."

"Okay, how about pint?"

"Nope."

"Alright how about a cup?"

There was a moment of silence.

Then, "Oh my gosh, Calvin! There's a cup!"

"This is worst than I thought, Hobbes. It appears you've been maimed by the vampire boulders! Your life will never be the same, again!"

"Yeah, and it was never the same to begin with."

"What?"

"Every day's always been different. And now it's going to be worse!"

"Hmmm, yes, of corse. You'll have to make many adjustments, Hobbes. Life without a leg is legless in many ways."

"Oh my gosh! I won't be able to limp anymore!"

"That's true." Calvin nodded. "You know the old saying: A three legged tiger never limps."

"I've never heard that one."

"Actually, I made it up, but it's true. Think of it, Hobbes. How could a three legged tiger limp? I think it's impossible."

"Yeah," Hobbes said. "And any leg that had three tigers would sure get tired."

"Exactly!" Calvin said. "The sheer mathematics of it... hmmm, I seem to have lost my train of thought."

"Railroad tracks?"

"What?"

"You were talking about trains and trains always leave tracks."

Calvin blinked.

"I was not talking about trains. I said I had lost my train of thought."

"You mean you lost track of what you were saying?" Hobbes asked.

"Yes, that's another way of putting it, I suppose."

"That's what I said."

"That is not what you said!" Calvin spat.

"No kidding?" Hobbes asked. "What did I say?"

"I don't know what you said! I've lost my track of trainless thought and... Shut up, Hobbes, and let me think."

It took Calvin a few seconds to remember what they were talking about.

"Oh yes, we were discussing your former leg. You had just lost it in the avalanche."

"Yeah, good old leg. I'll sure miss that limp. We've been together all these years."

"Like losing a friend, I suppose." Calvin said.

"Yeah, it's kinda sad. I even had a name for it. I called it George."

"You called your limp George?" Calvin said, his mouth dropping open.

"Yeah, I named him after Abraham Lincoln."

"He was a great American."

"Yeah. He was the best limp I ever had."

At that very moment, Calvin spotted something among rocks and boulders.

He narrowed his eyes and stared at it.

It appeared to be a cup. a coffee cup.

Interesting. What the heck was a coffee cup doing in a rock slide in the Late Cretac...

Oh.

OK, here's the deal. When Calvin had leaped into the hole and had bumped the MTM on the rock, its hypercube had malfunctioned and a cup had fell out, and had landed in the hole with him and Hobbes.

Calvin turned a glare in the direction of Hobbes' voice.

"Hobbes," He said. "At some point of this conversation, we were talking about blood from your severed leg. I asked if you could see a cup, and what did you say?"

"I don't remember."

"You said yes. Now, can you show me this cup of blood?"

"Oh, it wasn't a cup of blood, it was just a cup. Seem it's right over there. And it's a coffee cup."

Calvin gave Hobbes a withering glare.

"Count your legs, Hobbes. And you'll discover that all four are attached."

"One. Two. Three. Four. Oh my gosh, Calvin! I have my leg back, and my limp, too! Thanks Calvin, I sure am grateful!"

Calvin stared at Hobbes through the darkness.

He was so happy.

Calvin didn't have the heart to tell him that he might be insane.


Soon they decided to turn to the task at hand: getting out of the rock slide.

Calvin used the laser in the MTM, and burnt a hole through the rock, and they were able to climb out, into the blinding sunlight.

Not needing them anymore, Calvin and Hobbes took off their suits, and stored them into the MTM.

Calvin held his hand over his eyes, and blocked the sun out.

"Well, look at that." Calvin said to Hobbes. "There's the lake! And sure enough, there's a Triceratops herd down there! Oh joy!"

"Uh humm." Hobbes said, looking back up the mountain.

At that very moment, the MTM beeped, and a message shot out.

ASTEROID WARNING!

It is strongly recommended that all time travelers return to the present, IMMEDIATELY! A major environmental disaster is scheduled for tomorrow at 5:02PM. This is your final warning, buster! If you get destroyed along with all the other dinos, then it's no skin off my back!

01 day

23 hours

26 minutes

05 seconds

Calvin and Hobbes stared at the message.

Calvin typed out a reply.

Oh yeah? Well, when the asteroid hits, I will personally crush you with a rock!

The MTM didn't answer.

"Well, I put it in its place." Calvin announced, tucking the MTM away in his backpack. "You have to show these stupid machines whose boss, or the next thing you know, they'll start getting smart ideas."

Hobbes stared at Calvin suspiciously, wondering if he was going to keep his promise about taking him home at four forty five.


Calvin and Hobbes continued their walk down the rock slide until they finally came to a plain.

And about two hundred feet away, the Triceratops herd was grazing and drinking water.

Calvin took out the MTM and started rolling a video clip.

"This is great Hobbes!" Calvin said. "This herd is the ultimate herd! It has babies, and bulls, and cows, and these are dinosaurs, not cows, so why the heck am I calling them cows? And they're eating grass, and drinking water, and the babies are staring at us, and the adults are growling, slightly, and the babies are honking, and the adults are suddenly making this weird moaning sound, and the babies are running for the adults, and the adults are forming a circle around the babies, and shaking their horns, and the babies are cowering in circle, and the adults are..."

Hmmmm...

Calvin looked up from the camera, and stared at the bellowing herd.

The males were shaking their horns, and the babies were honking.

Calvin and Hobbes exchanged glances.

"They're forming a circle." Calvin said.

"To protect the babies." Hobbes said.

"But from what?" Calvin asked. "They're aren't any T. Rexes. And the raptors are long gone. What could they be protecting the babies from?"

"I dunno." Hobbes muttered. "Us?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Hobbes. We're simply innocent bystanders. Innocently standing by, and filming their fascinating herd."

"Yeah, but they might see us as a threat." Hobbes said. "Your MTM has a red stripe on it. And your shirt is red. Maybe they're like modern day bulls."

Calvin stared at Hobbes.

"Hobbes, that's the dumbest thing you've said since the last dumb thing you said."

"Yeah." Hobbes said. "But is there any other explanation? And remember you denied that the raptors were on the rock slide."

"I did not." Calvin insisted. "I was merely misquoted."

Calvin, those adults are getting closer.

"Exactly!" Calvin yelled. "Now if you don't mind, I'd like to..."

HUH?

All at once, the Triceratops were stomping their feet, and shaking their horns, and bellowing, kinda like a bull does when it's about to charge.

Calvin and Hobbes exchanged glances.

Calvin smacked his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

"SMACK. What I meant to say was, uh Hobbes? Those Triceratops kind of look like they got up on the wrong side of the bed, and maybe we should continue filming them from the, uh, top of the tree. What do you say?"

"Couldn't agree more."

"Yes, so let's just slowly back up for that tree there."

Calvin and Hobbes began backing up from the herd, who were still bellowing.

They were about five feet from the tree, and they thought that they would make it when...

Oh my gosh!

THE TRICERATOPS CHARGED!