Zypher: More reviews equal more chaos with the X crew. Hope you will enjoy today's chapter.
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Megaman X Parodies
Chapter 3
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In MHHQ, as usual, Zero, now calm from his sugar high, was flirting with all the ladies of the base.
Zero: -grinning all the while- Don't worry ladies, there's enough of me to go around. -he spots Diamond walking by, reading a book- But maybe not enough to catch her attention.
Diamond: -looks over to him- Don't even think about it. -walks into another room-
-Later that day-
Zero: -walks into the room Diamond was in and found her still reading the book- You know, reading too much make you unaware of danger, right?
Diamond: Sorry, you talking about yourself?
Zero: No! Why would I cause harm to you?
Diamond: Don't know, you almost crushed me when you were on your sugar high last time.
Zero: Well, that was then and this is now.
Diamond: Fine then. Why don't you go and flirt with all the girls that follow you around like you're a living god.
Zero: Pfft, it gets boring after a while. Come on, at least let me take you out somewhere. -gets hit with the book she was reading-
Diamond: How about no. I'm going to take a nap so I hope you won't be bugging me.
-Zero pouts and watched as she left before shooting out like a bullet when he heard Iris' voice.-
Zero: Gods, I need to get a restraining order on her.
-The next day, Diamond was out with Axl shopping at the local mall in Giga City which was a surprise that they built it in just a day-
Axl: Man the people really work fast to build a megamall in only a day.
Diamond: Yeah but either way, let's do some shopping.
Axl: Can I only ask one thing?
Diamond: -looks to him- If you think I'm going to make you wear stupid things, think again.
-Axl lets out a breath-
Diamond: -grins- That will be Marino and Cinnamon's job!
-Axl gulps and the two girls showed up, dragging him away screaming as Diamond followed with a laugh, unaware of who was following behind-
Marino: Ooh, let's go in here!
Cinnamon: No, let's try here!
Axl: How about we try none!
-They two girls continued to drag Axl into store after store, making him try on things from frilly dresses to colorful kimonos. He himself kept begging for freedom, trying to escape all the while but he never was able to. Diamond only watched, laughing still. She felt a tap on her shoulder and quickly brandishing a large frying pan, turned to see who tapped her and saw it was only Zero.-
Diamond: Why are you here?
Zero: To see if I can ask you out for a date.
Diamond: Nice try. Ask someone from your fan-club.
Axl: -in the shop they were standing in front of- SAVE ME!
Marino: It won't kill you Axl. It's only a dress.
Axl: WHO CARES IF IT'S A DRESS! I'M NOT A DOLL THAT WILL BE DRESSED UP IN A DRESS!
Diamond: Man I feel sorry for him but it's so fun to watch.
Zero: Yeah...So, what are you planning to do?
Diamond: -looks to him before whacking him over the head with the pan and runs off-
Zero: -rubs head- Should've seen that coming.
-As the day went by, Axl was still being dragged off to try on different outfits that he didn't want to try on and Diamond was with them the whole entire time, keeping an eye out for Zero-
Diamond: Well, no sign of him yet. Ok girls, let's take five and let Axl recuperate from his so called near death experience.
Cinnamon: Aw, let us have some more time, I wanted him to try this outfit on. -holds up bright pink tutu-
Axl: Oh no! Not this time! -runs and hides behind Diamond- Please make them go away!
Diamond: Fine. -bring out a dollar- Do something good with it.
-They take the dollar and run off somewhere into the mall-
Axl: Don't tell me you could've done that the whole entire time I was being tortured?
Diamond: Yes but it was too fun to watch you almost die of embarrassment.
-Zero shows up behind her again and she sighed-
Diamond: You won't go away until I say yes, will you?
Zero: Yes.
-At the food court-
Zero: How about now?
Diamond: -eating a hamburger- No.
-The arcade-
Zero: Now?
Diamond: -playing the same game from the first chapter- No.
-Bathroom-
Zero: Now?
Diamond: You know this is the ladies room right.
Zero: Yeah.
Diamond: Then get out!
-At another clothing store where Axl was forced to try on more outfits-
Zero: How about now?
Diamond: If I say yes, will you leave me alone?
-Zero nods-
Diamond: -sighs- Fine, anything to get you off my back.
-Zero cheers before running off-
Diamond: That was easier than expected.
-As it got late, they all headed back to base, Axl stuck in a kimono that Marino brought-
Diamond: Don't pout, I think it looks cute.
Axl: Don't call me cute. I was already tortured enough today.
Diamond: -shrugs and opens the door- Gah!
Zero: -shows up out of nowhere in front of her- Hey Diamond! I made reservations to the best restaurant in the city!
Diamond: You don't give up, do you?
Zero: Nope.
Diamond: Alright, let's get going cause I want to get back to my reading as soon as possible.
-They left out and Axl was about to run after Diamond when he felt two hands grab his shoulders-
Cinnamon: Where do you think you're going?
Marino: Yeah, there was a lot more we wanted to do with you at the mall then just have you try on outfits.
Axl: NOOOOOO!
-At the restaurant-
Diamond: Boy, you really trying to impress me, aren't you?
Zero: Yep.
Slash Beast: -posing as waiter, wearing a fake moustache- Do you have reservations?
Zero: -totally clueless- Yeah, it's under Omega.
Diamond: You know that's Slash Beast, right?
Zero: Really? -scrutinizes him and doesn't recognize him, even with the fake moustache- Nope, don't see a resemblance.
-Diamond sighs as they were led to their table-
Slash Beast: Enjoy your death...I mean, your meal. -leaves-
Diamond: Now that was stupid.
Zero: -picks up menu- Let's see what they have.
Diamond: -looks around- How come I have a feeling you had us get reservations at a place filled with mavericks?
Zero: Don't know, this was the best restaurant in the city at the cheapest price.
Diamond: And what was the price?
Zero: Free.
Diamond: -bangs head on table- We're going to die because of you.
Magma Dragoon: Hello, I will be you eliminator...I mean...waiter tonight. Anything you would like to drink?
Diamond: Water, just plain water.
Zero: I'll have lemonade.
Magma Dragoon: Right, be right back.
-They sat there, Diamond clearly aware of the mavericks roaming through the restaurant but Zero was still completely oblivious to them-
Zero: How about we try the Poisonous crab cakes?
Diamond: How about no.
-Magma Dragoon comes back with the water and lemonade-
Magma Dragoon: Here are your drinks. Are you ready to order?
Zero: Yes.
Diamond: No.
Zero: I would like the Energy Crystals with the Lava Cookies.
Diamond: Hopefully they won't kill you.
Magma Dragoon: Excellent choice. Your food will be ready in five minutes. -leaves-
Diamond: Zero, I'm just about ready to hit you.
Zero: Why?
Diamond: Oh I don't know. Maybe because we're having dinner in a restaurant filled with mavericks!
Zero: Really? I never noticed.
Diamond: -bangs head on table again and keeps it there-
-Magma Dragoon arrives with the food and Zero digs in greedily-
Diamond: -head still on the table- By the gods, please tell me those cookies don't have sugar in them.
Magma Dragoon: Uh, yes. Yes they do.
Diamond: You're all doomed then. Zero has a horrible sugar high and will most likely kill every maverick in here.
Magma Dragoon: What! Why didn't you warn us of this?!
Diamond: I think that last chapter would've been an example.
Magma Dragoon: Dang it. I knew I should've asked Sigma for that script.
Diamond: -places on army helmet- Prepare for operation Run Away! See ya. -runs off-
Magma Dragoon: Hey! What about us?!
-She was already gone-
Magma Dragoon: -feels a tap on his shoulder and shakily turns around- Yes...is there something you need?
Zero: -hyper once again- Do you know where my date went?
Magma Dragoon: If you don't kill me, I'll tell you.
Zero: Fine by me!
Magma Dragoon: She ran off because you were becoming hyper.
-He was silent and Magma Dragoon was about to run off too but was killed easily-
Zero: Too bad for me I guess! But you should've stopped her! I know that she knows that I'm somewhat psychotic when I'm hyper, that's why she always runs off. But she's my new happiness, next to sugar, and I won't let her go even if that means I have to tear down this whole entire place! -laughs and starts running through the restaurant, killing all mavericks in sight-
-In the kitchen-
Sigma: -wearing chef's hat- What do you mean those cookies we gave him only made him hyper! They were supposed to kill him!
Slash Beast: We don't know what went wrong. But you do know Zero is hard to kill, right?
Sigma: Yeah, you do have a point with that.
Diamond: -runs through- Run! Hyper Zero on the loose!
-They watch her leave before they heard Zero come in and they ducked just in time to avoid his saber-
Slash Beast: Any ideas?
Sigma: None.
-Soon, the building fell apart and with no Zero in sight, Diamond poked her head out from the rubble along with Slash Beast and Sigma-
Diamond: -looks to them- Next time butt-face, read the script before you try anything dealing with Zero.
Sigma: I'll remember that and stop calling me butt-face!
-Diamond was soon picked up by Zero and taken off back to HQ-
Diamond: Next time I'm going out with Axl. And speaking of which, what did you do with Iris? I thought she was your girlfriend.
Zero: Nah. I took care of her way before we went out tonight. She's hanging by a rope over a pit of lava at Magma Dragoon's place!
Diamond: You did what now?
-Like he said, Iris was hanging by a rope over a pit of lava at the volcano-
Iris: Zero! I thought we had something special!
-Back with Zero and Diamond-
Diamond: -looks to him- Simple, non-threatening break-ups never work with you, do they?
Zero: Nope.
Diamond: Note to self, hide if planning break-up with Zero. Of course, that's if I can get away from him.
Zero: -grins- And chances are you never will!
Diamond: And that's what I'm afraid of.
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Zypher: And that's all for today. Hoped you enjoyed this little episode of chaos and a hyperactive Zero.
