And now, chapter 5 of Super Smash Bros. Insanity!
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"AAAAGGGHHHH!" the non-pokemon smashers who fell asleep from Jigglypuff's singing the night before shrieked. Pikachu and Pichu merely rolled their eyes, and Mewtwo teleported out of the room.
"Oh, please don't let this stuff be permanent!" Samus cried.
"Pika Pikachu," Pikachu reassured Samus. (translation: I don't think it is.)
Mewtwo, after cleaning his face off, wandered in the on the upper floor. "I also haven't seen the Triforce bearers at all this morning." Mewtwo stopped in front of the door leading to Zelda's room and used his x-ray vision to see through the door. He gasped at what he saw. He tried to open the door, but it was locked.
"Morning, Mewtwo," Young Link greeted. "What are you doing in front of Princess Zelda's room?" Mewtwo grabbed the young Hylian's arm. "Gah! What are ya doing?" Mewtwo teleported them into the princess's room, where an almost naked Link was bound and gagged by the bed. "Oh, my goddesses! What happened?" gasped Young Link, staring at his struggling older self.
"I assume this is the doing of Ganondorf and Bowser," the psychic Pokemon ripped the tape off the hero's mouth.
"AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!" the Hylian screamed in pain. "Argh!" he groaned after recovering. "You couldn't be more correct. Zelda! Where's Zelda? Is she okay?"
"The princess is not in here," said Mewtwo. "She has most likely been kidnapped again."
Link exasperated a sigh as his younger self worked his Kokiri Sword to cut the ropes bounding the Hylian teen.
Freed from his predicament, Link stretched his arms and legs. "Let's go save us a princess!"
"Not like that, you're not!" snapped Mewtwo, referring to Link's attire, which was nothing but underwear.
"Oh," Link blushed. The Hylian donned his hat and tunic. "Okay," said a now fully dressed Link with his sword and shield at ready. "Let's go!" He unlocked the door, and he, his younger self, and the psychic pokemon exited the princess's room.
"What were you doing in Zelda's bedroom in the first place?" asked Mewtwo.
"I was trying to comfort her from last night's supper outburst," said Link.
Mewtwo sniffed the air. "The stench I smelled last night appears to have been coming from the room of the Mario bros," he thought to himself. "Hold on, Hylians," the legendary pokemon stopped in front of the bros.' room and used his x-ray vision again. He grabbed the Hylians' arms and teleported into the bros.' room.
Mario and Luigi, like Link, were asleep at the foot of their bunk bed bound and gagged, but unlike Link, they were still in their overalls. The area of the mushroom patterned carpet in front of Mario was covered with dried pizza chunks.
"Eew! Italian vomit!" Link cringed after unlocking the door.
The plumbers' eyes lifted open, and Mario muffled something no one could understand.
Link carefully stepped around the plumber puke to un-gag the brothers and cut the ropes with his Master Sword.
"What's-a going on?" the younger brother demanded.
"And where's-a Bowser and-a Ganondorf?" Mario added.
"I believe the villains have, once again, kidnapped Peach and Zelda," said Mewtwo. "They were pretty thorough this time. They locked the doors of this room and Zelda's room, where Link was also bound and gagged."
"What!" cried Mario. "I'm-a coming, Peach!" the red brother rushed toward Bowser's room.
"Should we follow him?" Young Link asked Mewtwo.
"The doors to Bower's and Ganondorf's rooms will most likely be locked, so yes," said Mewtwo.
Mewtwo, both Links, and Luigi chased after the portly Italian. Upon reaching Bowser's room, Mewtwo used his x-ray vision. "Interesting," the purple pokemon mused. "Zelda's tied up in there, not Peach."
"Must be a new strategy to confuse the princesses," Young Link guessed.
"Okay, Mario," said Link. "You and Luigi kick Bowser's butt, while my younger self and I free Zelda. Mewtwo, you know what to do."
"I sure do," said Mewtwo. He then said in his private thoughts with a dark smile, "Teleport them into the rooms then use my x-ray vision on the princesses, heh, heh, heh!"
The Links and the brothers touched Mewtwo, and the psychic Pokemon teleported the heroes into Bowser's room. The Link's rushed to Zelda, and the Italians rushed to face their reptilian foe.
"Well, well, well, pesky plumbers," Bowser growled. "This is a pleasant surprise. I never expected one like Mewtwo to assist you and the Hylians!"
"I only assist when my skills are needed," Mewtwo said before leaving to check Ganondorf's room.
"Well?" Bowser snorted a puff of smoke from his nostrils.
"Bring it on," Mario smirked.
A ring of fire surrounded Bowser and the brothers, and they began to fight.
Meanwhile, Link has untied the bandana covering Zelda's mouth while his younger self worked on the ropes. "Link!" the princess sighed in relief. "And Young Link," she giggled. "I'm still not used to that."
"You okay, Zel?" Link asked.
"I am now, Link," the ropes keeping Zelda tied up were finally cut, and she hugged the Hero of Time and pecked him on the cheek. Link blushed violently, and curled a Charlie Brown smile on his face.
"Hey! What about me?" Young Link asked. "I helped too!"
"I'd never forget about you, Young Link," Zelda pecked a kiss on the young Hylian's forehead. Young Link too blushed violently and curled a Charlie Brown smile.
The flames surrounding the Mario characters vanished with the brothers standing triumphantly over Bowser's unconscious form. "He'll-a be fine," said Mario while he and his brother walked to the Hylians.
"Well," Link said to his younger self after picking up the key to Zelda's room, "ready to give Ganondorf a good ole Linkwhopin' (1)?"
"You bet!"
Zelda and the heroes left for Ganondorf's room. They met Mewtwo in front of the door. "Peach is in there, and Ganondorf is still asleep," the psychic pokemon said. "I have unlocked the door for you. Good luck, heroes." With that, Mewtwo teleported to attend to his own business.
"Here, Zel," Link handed Zelda her room key.
"Thanks again, Link. Give Ganondorf a good whack in the head for me," the Hyrulean princess left to tend to her duties.
"This is it," Link thought as he turned the knob on Ganondorf's door. Ganondorf was sprawled on his top bunk at one corner (what a lazy pig!), and in another corner, Princess Peach was in a cage struggling in the ropes bounding her, muffling screams from a cloth covering her mouth.
"Let's give ole Ganny a rude awakening!" said Young Link while Mario and Luigi searched for the key to Peach's cage.
The Links climbed to the top bunk. "Get up, pig-for-brains!" Link said.
"We got a bone to pick with you!" Young Link added.
"Ugh! I don't wata go to school today, Twidrova," the Gerudo sniffled a groan.
"No, silly," Young Link lightly kicked Ganondorf's leg.
"Wha-what?" the Evil King shook awake. "Well, Links!" he said in a raspy tone. "Seebs I hab uderestibated both ob you!"
"You feeling alright?" Link wondered.
"Deber felt—bleapeah!" the bloodshot Gerudo sneezed a shiny object out of his nose.
"Eeeeeewww!" Luigi cried.
"Ick!" Mario agreed. "Well it's-a better than-a storing it up his-a butt."
"Mario, you're making-a me woozy!
"Well," said Link, "I guess this is for Zelda," he whacked Ganondorf unconscious in the head with the hilt of the Master Sword.
Mario reluctantly picked up the snot-covered key. "Yuck! I'm-a gonna have to put-a my gloves in-a the wash after this."
"Here, guys!" Young Link tossed his sword to the brothers. "You can use that to cut the ropes."
"Thanks, Young Link," Luigi said picking up the Kokiri Sword.
"Mario! Luigi!" Peach cried when the red-clad plumber untied her bandana. "I knew you two would come rescue me. But why did Ganondorf kidnap me?"
"It-a wasn't just-a Ganondorf," said Mario, while Luigi worked on the ropes with Young Link's sword. "It was-a Bowser's doing as-a well."
"We kicked-a Bowser's butt in-a his room, where Zelda was-a held-a hostage," Luigi added.
"Thank you, so much," Peach graciously hugged both brothers when the ropes were finally cut loose.
While Luigi handed the Kokiri Sword back to Young Link, the Mushroom princess kissed the older brother on the cheek. Thus, the SMAS end sequence was revamped.
"Let's go downstairs," said Peach. The heroes and the princess left the room of the flu-stricken Ganondorf.
Ganondorf was nurtured back to health with his wife, Destiny, whom you've probably met in my other SSBM fanfic, at his bedside.
Peach caught Ganondorf's flu the next day, and Mario stayed by her bedside the whole time. He caught it, and Peach stayed by his side the whole time. How sweet!
Mewtwo continued to assist the smasher heroes, but only if he felt his psychic powers were needed.
Young Link continued on in his childhood days.
Link and Zelda simply lived happily ever after.
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I can't believe it's actually done. (sniff) This is the first multi-chapter fanfic I've ever completed typing. I thank all of you that read or R&R this story. I may consider writing a sequel.
(1) Linkwhopin': "the term for when Link completely owns someone or something." This term was started by Exploding Deku Nut's webmaster, Darth Citrus, in one of his A.S.S.A.s (A Somewhat Serious Article) on Zelda Blog.
