"What happens after?" Sakura asks.

Ino raises an eyebrow at her.

"After I fall," Sakura adds.

"They blame me for your death," Ino says, picking at her lunch with chopsticks.

"But I left a note!"

Sakura's chopsticks snap under the pressure of her grip. The worst part is knowing that there's nothing she can do to change that outcome. Who would believe her if she tried to explain her meddling in Uchiha affairs?

Nobody. It would be a quick ticket to T & I for her or Ino. Or both. And that would be really weird for Ino given that her dad is kind of important there.

Would Shisui even believe that she is also Shisui, but in a new body because who even knows how reincarnation works? She tries to imagine a little girl with pink hair coming up to her and saying that she is also Shisui, and it's difficult to believe even as a hypothetical in which she already knows the little girl is telling the truth.

Man, her head hurts.

Ino gives a small smile. "Notes can be forged. It doesn't matter. Those who accuse me already believe that I'm a traitor to the clan with how many meetings I miss and how often I'm on ANBU missions. They would never accept the truth because they would also have to accept that they had a part in driving you to such drastic action."

Sakura tosses her useless chopsticks to the ground. "Do you think it's better that we don't involve ourselves?"

She doesn't ask outright what happens next. Part of her doesn't want to know. The other part of her wants to know, but is afraid of the answer.

Ino nods. "We don't have many other options as we are, not without ending up in ROOT."

"I know that we aren't part of the clan anymore, but it's hard to truly convince myself of that. The concept that we have to trust in our previous selves is not one that the human mind is made to comprehend."

"I will watch after Sasuke regardless of what body my soul occupies," Ino says.

Sakura laughs. "That goes without saying."

Ino spares her a quick glance, and if Sakura were anyone else, she might have missed it.

She's left feeling like she's being kept in the dark.


For her eighth birthday, she doesn't receive any real weapons. Again. Maybe it's a result of her average abilities at the academy. Her parents probably hope that she'll outgrow the desire to be a shinobi, but they don't realize it's the only thing she knows.

She is a tool for her village.

Her life is speed, a blade in her hand, and the sparks of metal clashing. She is meant to flicker through battles like a vengeful ghost, cutting down enemies before they notice she's left her original position. Quick and clean.

Merciful.

For now, in her parents' eyes, she is a child. A child with unstained hands. One who has never taken a life or injured a living creature. They've never experienced the life of a shinobi, and they are blessed to have a child during peacetime.

Sakura indulges them, and she loves them. In her past life, she never experienced the support and consistency they give her. So, she saves her viciousness for the night and hones the skills she perfected in one life until she perfects them again.

It can mean the difference between life and death for the people she loves.


"You're going to be on the Ino-Shika-Cho team of this generation," Sakura points out.

"I know."

"That's pretty weird, isn't it?"

Ino gives her a look that asks what part of this isn't weird.

"Okay, that's fair," Sakura says. "It'll be tough to watch over Sasuke when we split off from the academy."

And now she's being glared at.

"I'm saying that I'll help you, okay? I don't have a destined team or anything, not even a clan. All I have is a grand past, not a grand future."

"I appreciate that you will watch over him as well," Ino says. "But a grand future could still be in the making for you."

Sakura makes a sound somewhere between a laugh and a snort. She doesn't point out that it's always been Ino who's the grand one. As both Ino and Itachi. From heir to heiress. Inheritor to a team composition that's held up for generations.

Sakura has always been a nobody.


How?

How does she end up with the Fourth Hokage's son crushing on her? What sort of cosmic joke is this?

Hearing him call out, "Sakura-chan!" creates an icy pit in her stomach. Sakura wishes she could shunshin away.

Damn Ino is trying to hold back her laughter, and it earns her a sharp elbow jabbed into her side.

Sakura mouths "I will end you" to her. And she has the gall to look innocent. Blonde haired, blue-eyed bitch.

Naruto sits himself next to Sakura, putting her in the middle of the table with Ino on the other side (and she knows that Ino has no intentions of moving to let her escape). He talks at a rapid fire pace with a vocal tic at the end of his sentences that reminds her of Kushina when she would visit the compound to see Mikoto. Naruto is truly his mother's child.

Sakura sees a part of her old self in Naruto. The part that sought attention. The part that wished to hear somebody say her name and recognize her, because her dad no longer knew who she was as he grew closer to death. But she found attention through becoming a force of nature in her own right. Naruto tries to find it through forcing others to take notice of him. For now, that seems to mean being loud and colorful. It means playing pranks and showcasing that he is just a child, and not the Nine-tailed Fox hidden within him.

She tries to smile and nod at whatever nonsense is spewing forth from his mouth, but she's pretty sure that her smile is a grimace and her nod appears a little jerky and unnatural.

It's not that Naruto isn't a good kid.

The thing is that Sakura still has the mentality of a man in his late teens. She isn't sure how to deal with this infatuation directed towards her.

From the corner of her eye, she catches the little Hyuuga girl watching Naruto with her face tinted red as she fidgets with the edges of her sleeves.

Poor girl.

Maybe Sakura can find a way to shove Naruto's attention towards her instead.


She's not entirely lying when she says she's going out to play tag with Ino, though her parents get a look on their faces that lets her know that they find it weird how specific she's being in letting them know the exact game she'll be playing with Ino once they meet up in the evening.

Ino's dad gives them permission to train on the Yamanaka Clan's grounds.

Ino leans against the wall beside her house's main door, hands tucked in her pockets and eyes shut.

Sakura throws a shuriken with perfect precision to hit the wall next to Ino's head without it touching her, and Ino doesn't flinch. The shuriken bounces off the wall and to the ground harmlessly.

"You've always had bad manners, but they seem to have worsened," Ino says. She opens her eyes and picks up the shuriken. "Is this wooden?"

Sakura flickers in front of her and takes the shuriken back. "Shut up," she says. "My parents won't buy me real weapons. Civilians, remember?"

Ino smirks and turns, holding the door open for Sakura, then says, "Yet you chose to become a shinobi once again."

Sakura follows her to the forested area behind the Yamanaka house where they are allowed to play their training games. "I don't think I'd be good at anything else. I mean, you've seen my flower arranging."

"Calling what you did 'flower arranging' is a disgrace to my family's flower shop."

"You're so mean to me, Ino," Sakura says, though there's only humor in her tone.

Ino rolls her eyes.

When they are certain that they're deep enough in the trees to be safe from prying eyes showing up, they share a nod (a feral grin breaks out on Sakura's face) and start their game.

Sakura walks halfway up a tree so she stands parallel to the ground, an action as easy as breathing for her and Ino.

And then they vanish, flickering from tree to tree and trying to catch each other. Sakura feels right at home in this environment. Trying to grab, as well as evade, Ino as they both avoid touching the ground by sticking to trees and rocks with chakra. The string of curses and elaborate death threats that pass between them leave Sakura fooled for a moment, and she sees them as Shisui and Itachi again. Bathed in darkness and torn between loyalties. Village and clan.

They aren't exactly tired when they call the game to an end (although Sakura made sure to remind Ino that she is the faster one in every life) as it grows dark and Sakura knows that her parents like to see her walk in the door to ascertain her safety. Ignoring that she can hop in through the windows.

"I should get going," Sakura says, rubbing the back of her head with a sheepish smile. "My parents actually care about me this time, and they don't think that I can take care of myself."

Ino raises one eyebrow. "Well, you don't have a single shinobi in your family. You are also supposed to be eight."

"It's weird. I used to be on my own and not have to worry about a manhunt being started because I didn't go home on time. Then, it was just you and me and we thrived in the shadows."

"I know," Ino says. "Everything is different."

Sakura holds out one hand with a grin, waiting for Ino to grasp it. "Not everything."

Ino takes her hand.

The world feels right.


Their second year at the academy is coming to an end, and Sakura is proud to say that she has maintained her perfectly average status. She fists bumps the air, and Ino grabs her arm, forcing it back down.

"That isn't something to be proud of, Sakura," Ino says, but she has amusement in her eyes.

Sakura swats at Ino's hand. "Sorry I'm not good enough for Miss Top Kunoichi."

There is no heat in either girls' words. The academy is a game for them, and they play their parts with great fun. It's a far cry from their previous lives, where they were constantly crushed by pressure and expectations until they were more tools than human. Besides, pretending to be close to the level they should be at keeps Ino in Sasuke's class and it keeps Sakura out of ROOT.

It's because they know of the disease plaguing the village's bureaucracy that they take extra measures to not appear extraordinary (or overly so in Ino's case, clan status giving her a measure of leeway). They know how much of a mistake that would be firsthand.

Sakura hears a familiar 'hn' from nearby and turns to see Sasuke, a precious little smirk on his face as he looks at his Rookie of the Year title for the second year in a row. A glance tells her that Ino feels proud of him, but there isn't a way to tell him that in a meaningful way without appearing to be a fan-girl (and Sakura is certain Ino would stab herself before allowing the image to be applied to her). So, they're both stuck watching in silence from afar.

It leaves a bittersweet taste in her mouth. Sasuke only ever wants Itachi to notice him, but he never sees that Itachi is proud of him no matter what. Itachi will always be proud of him. In every life.

Ino's polite smile shifts to a strained smile when Naruto complains about his last place ranking in the grade, and Sasuke scoffs at him before saying something condescending that Sakura can't take seriously coming from him.

Part of that is because his attitude is so stereotypical Uchiha it scares her. That's the attitude that led to the plotting of a coup, and consequently led to her suicide.

What happens with the coup?

She knows Ino isn't telling her everything. She convinced herself for a while that it's better to be in ignorance, but as the day she threw herself from a cliff grows closer, it's tough to push down the need for answers.

The worst piece of knowledge is that she can't do anything to change the outcome. Not reasonably.

She's afraid.


The nightmares start again, only this time with a different circuit of images. Some are fabrications of her mind. While she knows this, it doesn't make them easier to bear.

Others are moments of a life long passed.

She isn't sure which is worse.

Unlike the nightmares of losing her eyes, these ones don't have her waking up already in the middle of screaming and crying. Which means that her parents aren't alerted to her dismay until it begins taking a physical toll on her.

The red tint of her goggles helps hide the dark circles accumulating beneath her eyes, but it doesn't hide the way that her head droops and then jerks back up as she nearly falls asleep at the table. Nor does it hide her lack of appetite as she pokes at her breakfast without making an effort to bring any food to her mouth.

"Sakura?" her dad asks, his voice soft and gentle. "Are you okay?"

Sakura nods. "I'm just tired, Dad."

And that's the truth. She's tired emotionally and mentally from nightmares that make no sense. She's tired physically from the lack of sleep that brings. She's tired from the anxiety of the unknown and worrying about what the result of the planned Uchiha coup ends up being.

Does it result in a civil war, or is it handled peacefully?

She hopes for the latter, but she also knows that hope doesn't matter for much.

"You can stay home from the academy if you want to rest," he says.

Sakura shakes her head.

"You don't have to be a shinobi," her mom says, joining in the conversation. "It'll only bring more nightmares."

Sakura takes a deep breath, then shoves a forkful of food into her mouth and gives her parents a large—albeit unconvincing—grin. "I will be a shinobi."

She doesn't know how to be anything else.


Others don't notice it, but Sakura sees how Ino becomes a little more reserved as their third year in the academy begins and Fall closes in (including Shisui's fall).

Bitch won't tell her anything about it.

She's hiding something, that's for sure.

The problem is that Itachi has always had a habit of keeping things to himself instead of asking for help.

"I want you to be able to rely on me."

And yeah, maybe she fucked that part up a bit. Throwing oneself off a cliff doesn't fall under the category of being reliable.

She works harder to make up for it, pushing her body to its limits to condition it for when the next war comes. Conditioning it for her to play her part in avoiding or delaying the next war for as long as possible.

If people are good at one thing, it's choosing violence over peace.

She hates it, but she knows the necessity of controlled and carefully planned violence. She knows that taking one life can save dozens of other lives.

She wants to be ready to play her part when their academy charade is over so that she doesn't lose her friends and family again.

So that she doesn't become a murderer due to jealousy.

But she knows the effort required for strength because she's done it before, so she can do it again. She also knows that she doesn't need the Sharingan to get the Flee on Sight status in the Bingo Book.

Even sparring against her clone in an empty training ground until sundown doesn't ease the anxiety that's settled deep in her stomach.

She pushes her limits everyday, but it never feels like enough.


Ino won't look her in the eyes. She's purposely avoiding Sakura, and when they're forced to be nearby, she makes sure that there are others nearby. Witnesses.

She doesn't want to talk to Sakura. She doesn't want to answer the questions that are burning on Sakura's tongue.

The worst part is that she's not angry. Unlike the rest of the village, she knows that Itachi wouldn't snap like that. But she's now one of only a handful who know that there was a plan for a coup, which she's certain has led to this outcome.

Because the Uchiha are dead.

She just wants to know if that was the only way. If her suicide was useless. She deserves that much.

And Ino deserves to know that she doesn't hate her.


A/N: Basically, I have a very busy work week coming up and I wanted to get the second chapter up before it.

The interest and enjoyment in this story was both unexpected and amazing. I don't have it planned out rigidly, but it's one that I would like to take on a life of its own and see where it ends up with the influence of canon events.