Series: Snapshots of the Past

Story: Checkmate

Chapter 8

Disclaimer: See Chapter 1

Previously: Leo continued to lie about his drinking; Jenny told Abbey she and Leo are going Europe so Leo can get help for his drinking; Jed informed Abbey that he has a challenger in the primary, one that might be calling her for an endorsement

Summary: Jed and Abbey share a late-night heart-to-heart

"I said I was sorry." Her emphatic apology did nothing to soften him.

Jed kept his hands on the wheel and continued to stare at the road ahead, only acknowledging Abbey with three little words. "I heard you."

"I admit it was a bad decision," she said. "It's not my first. It probably won't be my last."

"If it was just a bad decision, I could get over it. But it wasn't. This was a calculated attempt to deceive and manipulate me. You used my trust and my love for you to fool me."

"Believe me, I didn't give it that much thought. It was a spur-of-the-moment thing."

"Of course it was." His cynical tone only irritated her more.

"It was."

"Before we left the house, there was one movie...just ONE movie I told you I did NOT want to see."

Abbey sighed as she pressed her back against the seat and looked away from her husband. Since leaving the theater, she had heard this lecture twice. "Yes, I know."

"And when you sent me to get the popcorn, you went to the box office and, in the spur of the moment, what did you do?"

"That's where the bad decision comes in," she mumbled. "We've been over this, Jed. I bought tickets for that movie because I figured you'd change your mind once it started."

"And you can't understand why I'm a little miffed?"

"I never said I didn't understand. I said that if I could take it back, I would."

"You always want to take everything back. You can't. This is life, Abbey. You can't just take things back because they don't work out exactly as you planned."

"Why do I get the feeling we're not just talking about the movie?"

Jed glanced at her briefly, then returned his attention to the road. Twenty-four hours had passed since he found out the man who was challenging him in his election also wanted to court his wife's endorsement. He tried to suppress his feelings, but tempering his emotions had never been more than a futile attempt to suffocate the essence of who he was. He wore his heart on his sleeve and because of that, he sometimes needed space to tend to his wounds in private before he could expose to them to anyone - even Abbey.

They drove in silence for the next several minutes, neither wanting to approach a potential argument. Finally sick of the quiet, Jed broke the tension. "Did you know that the most classic poltergeist stories originate in England, even though the word 'poltergeist' is actually German?"

"Here we go," Abbey muttered, her exasperation reflected in the side mirror.

"I saw you roll your eyes. Don't you dare complain. If you take me to the movie, you have to sit through the post-movie lecture."

"Go on," she said flatly.

"Poltergeists, some theorists believe, haunt the living to avenge their own violent deaths. They're murder victims, see? That's why the way in which they present themselves is always so terrifyingly violent - levitations, furniture being tossed around the room, objects spiraling out of control."

"Except none of it's true."

"Says you," he replied.

"Well, yes. I am a scientist, Jed. Even parapsychologists admit that many 'victims' of poltergeists confess to faking the paranormal activity they've reported."

"That's right. We've talked about this before, which makes it all the more puzzling to me why you bought tickets for that movie. And, by the way, the next time Lizzie asks if she can see it, we don't even hesitate when we tell her 'no.'"

"I'll let you handle that."

"And I will, with pleasure. The whole notion that anyone would want to witness an innocent person succumb to unspeakable violence at the hands of a metaphysical creature brought to life on the big screen is beyond me."

"You know, for someone who had absolutely no interest in seeing this movie, you sure know a lot about the subject matter."

"It's been out for a month. You think I didn't research the hype?" He gave her a pointed stare that turned quickly into a proud grin. "Besides, I know a little something about everything."

"I know you do," she admitted softly. "Your intelligence and impeccable knowledge of...well, everything...is the trait I fell in love with first."

"Now that's something I didn't know."

"I bet you thought I was a shallow gal, only interested in your good looks."

"Only on the days I was feeling especially egotistical," he teased.

"That handsome face was the icing on the cake. The combination of your big brain, good heart, and compassionate soul - that's what attracted me." She took a beat, then added, "And your forgiving nature, of course."

"You're manipulating me again. Don't think I don't know it."

"I'm hoping one of these times, it'll work."

He slid his right hand off the wheel and laced his fingers through hers, gently squeezing as their palms joined. "It just did."

His warm declaration gave her hope. The night before had been a sleepless one. After Jenny and Leo left, Jed retired to his study while Abbey waited up for him in their bedroom. He never made it there. It was intentional, she thought, to avoid the discussion awaiting them. He knew she hadn't planned to leave him vulnerable to an opponent, but she was fairly confident that knowledge didn't stop the myriad of bitter feelings that consumed him.

But now, things seemed calmer, more peaceful between them. Her optimism swelled beyond just small-talk and she longed for a conversation with substance, one that would allow them to clear the air once and for all.

As she changed into her nightgown that evening, Jed slipped into bed and turned off the lights just as quickly as he could. "Good night."

Abbey accepted it without a fight, for she feared forcing him into an exchange he wasn't ready to have would provoke a fight neither of them wanted.

"Good night," she said as she prepared herself for another restless slumber. She tossed and turned for about an hour.

He felt every movement, noted every sigh, and when he heard her fumbling in the dark for her slippers, he spoke up. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going downstairs."

After a 15-minute head start, he followed her down. She stood in front of the sink in the kitchen, a glass in her hand, completely oblivious to his presence as he secretly crept up behind her. "They're baaaack!"

Had she been at all aware, his scent probably would have given him away. But it didn't. So, with the first syllable of his gruff voice, she let out a yelp and dropped the glass on the countertop.

"You JACKASS!" she screamed when she spun around to face him.

"Serves you right for tricking me into seeing a movie I didn't want to see." He laughed.

"Stop laughing! That wasn't the least bit funny."

"Why can't you sleep? Did you have a nightmare?"

"No," she replied. "I just couldn't sleep. I came down here to get a snack. It turns out you didn't finish the chocolate cheesecake after all."

"Not yet. Give me time." He gestured for the plate she brought down from the cupboard. "I'm actually glad you're up. I can't sleep either."

Abbey rinsed her cup and grabbed one for Jed. "You seemed to be doing a pretty good job of it earlier."

"I'm a pro, skilled in the art of make-believe." While she retrieved a carton of milk, he took out the utensils and carried two slices of cake to the kitchen table.

"Good. You can share your talent at Ellie and Zoey's tea party next week." Her lighthearted expression melting into a serious one, she took the seat across from him. "I need to tell you something - about Leo and Jenny."

"What's that?"

"They're not going on a second honeymoon. Jenny is taking Leo to a Swiss clinic where her uncle is a doctor."

"What's wrong with Leo?" He froze, his hand still gripping the fork that hadn't even touched the cake.

"He has a drinking problem, Jed." Jed dismissed the response with a shake of his head. "Jenny tried to tell you this years ago."

"Leo insists he's fine." It broke his heart to admit that even he could see Leo was anything but fine.

"Do you really believe he's fine?" Jed stared down at his plate without an answer. "That's what I thought."

"Why should we trust this place?"

"It's not up to us. Jenny's his wife. She made the call. It sounds like a decent clinic, Jed. Jenny told me all about it. It's kind of like going to A.A. They treat clients on an outpatient basis on the condition of anonymity. No one will ever even know."

"Why didn't Leo tell me?"

"A combination of shame and denial. Also, because he's not happy about it. Jenny kind of forced him into it by telling him if he didn't do this, she'd leave."

"Because an ultimatum is sure to help their marriage." This wasn't regular sarcasm. He was unusually defensive. "If you ever did that to me...don't ever do it, Abbey. I don't know what I'd do."

"Are you mad that Leo's getting help? Or are you mad that you didn't know he needed it sooner?"

She hit a nerve. He glared at her as he stood. "I'm mad that he had to be forced into it, backed into a corner, probably convinced he has no other choice!"

"He HAS no other choice, Jed!" Her strong tone rivaling his, she rose to her feet as well.

"I don't want him to feel all alone, like everyone he cares about is just going to abandon him for something he can't control! I don't want him to feel ashamed. That won't inspire the willpower he needs right now."

"I'm sure he didn't like being backed into a corner, but it's for his own good."

"And I'm mad that I can't be there to help him through this." His voice was subtle, his impotence hidden in layers of frustration.

Abbey put a hand on his shoulder when he turned to rest his hands on the counter. "Jenny's there, Honey. She's his wife. She's going to help him."

"Leo told me she's always on his case."

"Jed." She tried to reason with him. "This is Jenny. She loves him."

He knew Jenny loved him, but his loyalty to Leo won out. "Sometimes, I think Leo doesn't believe that. I can't imagine what that kind of doubt must feel like."

"It's just a symptom of his alcoholism. Once he's better, he'll realize everything Jenny did, she did out of love. They'll get through this."

He turned again. This time, towards her. "Abbey, why didn't you tell me about this before they left? It would have been nice if I had a chance to talk to Leo about it, let him know I was here if he needed me."

"Jenny didn't want you confronting him. If Leo found out you knew, she was afraid he'd back out of the whole thing."

"Why?"

"He'd worry that you'd think he was weak or helpless."

"I would never think that. It's ridiculous for him to believe I would."

"You'd probably feel the same way if the situation was reversed," Abbey assured him. " And one thing you're forgetting - LEO didn't want you to know, Jed. He should have been the one to tell you."

"But since he didn't..."

"Since he didn't, I would have...if you had come to bed last night."

Jed avoided her stare. He plopped down in his chair and sipped his milk as he looked away. "Yeah."

Now that she had his attention, she took a deep breath and continued. "Do you think it's strange that we haven't discussed Jake Tillman? He is running against you and you seemed pretty convinced he was going to call me for an endorsement, yet you haven't brought it up since you first mentioned it."

"I don't know what to say."

"Then let me do the talking." She reclaimed her seat, looking him squarely in the eye as she spoke. "He hasn't called me and he's not going to. He'd be stupid not to know that my loyalty lies with you."

"You'd be surprised how many stupid people there are out there."

"Regardless, I'm not thrilled that you think I would consider endorsing anyone who ran against you. The fact that you suspected I would, even for a minute, tells me that we have a serious problem."

"I know you wouldn't do that to me."

"The thought wouldn't even enter my mind. There is no way I could ever support any other candidate and that's not just because you're my husband and I love you, though you are and I do. It's because I'm a constituent in this district and I truly believe you're the right man to represent all of us."

"Well, the fact that I'm your husband must have had something to do with it."

"A little bit," she agreed in a softer tone. "But I didn't need it to sway me. It's more about the fact that you're a terrific representative."

"You're a bit biased there, Dr. Bartlet." He winked at her.

"I'm not kidding," she answered. "I learned so much these past few weeks, Jed. I always knew you were wonderful, but I had no idea that everyone else knows it too. Everywhere I went, every door I knocked on, there was always someone who couldn't wait to tell me what YOU did for them, how YOU helped them. You mean a lot to the people in this town. They love you."

A rosy blush colored Jed's cheeks as he grinned modestly. "You're not just trying to build up my ego here, are you?"

"Please. Like you need my help with that." Abbey chuckled. "This sounds like I'm talking to one of the girls, but I really mean it. I'm proud of you. I'm proud to be your wife and I'm so proud of what you've done for all the people who count on you to serve them in the State House."

He lowered his head and when he looked back up, his face was beaming with gratitude. "I really needed to hear that."

"I wish I had said it sooner. You'll like this part too. I'm dropping my campaign."

"You're what?"

"I'm done. For the rest of this election, I'm going to focus on doing what I can do to help you."

"Abbey..."

"I'm serious. I told you from the start my goal was never to hurt you or to make you lose your seat. I never wanted that. I especially don't want it now."

He held up his hands to interject. "You can't stop."

"Why?"

"Well, for one, it's not going to look good for either one of us. You quit now and all everyone will say is that I asked you to or that you did it just so I wouldn't get my ass kicked."

"That's crazy."

"It's politics." And that's what it all came down to. Abbey hadn't yet learned how the game of politics was really played. "Also, if you stop doing what you're doing, I'm always going to feel like you're going to resent me a little bit."

"That's never going to happen."

"You say that now, but what about the next time you have a terminally ill patient who's in a tremendous amount of pain and you're feeling helpless because you gave up the fight for a drug that you believe could have helped?"

"This is my decision. Before I'd ever resent you, I'd probably blame myself."

"I don't want that either." He reached across to hold her hand. "You're not doing this to teach me a lesson. I know that now. You're doing it because it's something you believe in."

"Does it really matter why? Is it going to matter in the long run? I hate that I left you wide open. I know you saw this coming from the start, but I didn't. If I had, Jed, I wouldn't have..."

"I know. Your campaign is in full swing now and you have to see it through, not just for me or for us, but because there are people out there counting on you to fight for this."

"I'll tell you a secret," she whispered. "There aren't quite as many as I said. I mean, the panel discussion was a success and I do have some signatures, but you've been right all along. The majority is still not behind this."

It may not have been completely over, but the defeat was clear in her eyes. The light and dark emerald hues sparkled with disappointment and Jed sat back against his chair, speechless.

"What? No 'I told you so?'" Abbey joked.

He shook his head. "I thought you were doing so well. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I wanted to prove to you that this is as important to others as it is to me. But it's not." Disillusioned, she looked down as she swirled her fork around the frosting.

Jed wanted to help, to do or say something to take away the sadness he saw on her face. "I don't know if we can draw that conclusion just yet. Maybe you need to reevaluate a few things."

"You see a problem with my strategy?"

"Are you asking my opinion?"

"I'm curious about what you think."

The last time he tried to offer his help, she blew him off. This time, he proceeded cautiously. "There are certain things I've noticed that might be giving you some problems."

"Like what?" she asked nonchalantly as she leaned back and took a bite of her cake.

A tug of war played out in his mind and the love he had for Abbey won over his own ambition. He was about to do something he wouldn't have done for any other opponent. "Go get your map and I'll show you."

The thought was appealing, but she hesitated. "I can't do that. Asking you to help me while you're running on an entirely different platform would make us both extremely uncomfortable."

"Hey, don't think I'm doing it for you." A big smirk defining his features, Jed teased her. "I just don't want you to cry ignorance when you lose this thing."

"Watch it, Jethro."

"Seriously, would it surprise you to know that I've been rethinking my stand on the debate?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, it would."

"Given what I know, I would never vote for legalization of medicinal marijuana, but I am wondering if fighting you over a debate really is the best move - both politically and personally."

"Because of Jake Tillman?"

"I don't think what you do will help Jake at all. But if I'm going to pride myself on representing these people, then I should listen to what they have to say, even if I don't necessarily want to hear it. There is some interest in a debate and rallying against it may cause more problems than it's worth."

"But you're convinced a debate won't change your mind?"

"Or the minds of my colleagues. If you want my honest opinion, Abbey, I still don't think you'll win this war statewide. I just can't support it when it comes time to vote. But you can win this battle. Isn't that what you wanted all along?

She nodded. "Part of it anyway. What will that do to you?"

"Now that you've told me all this, I'm confident it'll do nothing to me. You need one-third to sign your petition, so if I get the two-third who don't agree with you to vote for me, we both win."

"Isn't that cutting it a bit too close?"

It was, he had to admit, but her happiness was worth the risk. "Closer than I'd like, but I have faith in this district. They're not going to vote for a one-issue candidate no matter what that issue is."

"You're right. They're not. Even the ones who support me say they're going to vote for you."

"You've been polling my votes?"

"You don't think I sing your praises before I get their signatures?"

The prospect made him happy. Even more than the promise of votes, Jed was touched that it was Abbey who was looking out for him with the voters. "I never really gave it much thought."

"We talk a lot about you. How else would I have known how much they love you?"

"I assumed those were the ones who turned you down."

"You know what they say about assumptions." She arched her brow slightly as she sipped her milk.

"Go get your goofy map," he ordered with a smile.

Abbey stood then and walked around behind him. She leaned forward, holding her hair while she pressed her lips to his cheek affectionately, kissing him. Their eyes locked together, she pushed his hair off his forehead, rubbed his shoulder, and left for the study.

When she returned, she found an abandoned kitchen table and crumbs of chocolate cheesecake that led out of the kitchen. She followed the path towards the living room, where Jed sat sprawled out on the sofa cushions, a plate in his hand and his dessert occupying his attention.

"You're as bad as Zoey," she called out to him.

"You know I can't resist this stuff." He set the cake on the coffee table as he took his reading glasses from her. "Thanks. Now, let's see."

Abbey collapsed onto the cushion and held her maps up for his inspection. "You know what I didn't count on?"

"What?"

"I cross referenced the numbers I got from the Secretary of State's office with the numbers I got at the library and some of them are outdated."

"Yeah. Look here." He pointed to one of the houses she had highlighted. "That's the Changs' house. You won't get anywhere with them because they've only been in the U.S. for four years. They haven't met the minimum years of residency to qualify for citizenship, so they can't vote."

"They've been in Manchester for four years. How do you know they've only been in the country that long?"

"I just do." Jed Bartlet knew his district. He knew the people, the families, and the issues that shaped the lives of his constituents.

She smiled. "I had no idea."

"Of what?"

'How involved you are,' she wanted to say. But she didn't. Embarrassed to admit that because of her hospital schedule, she had neglected this part of Jed's life, she paused before she answered. An economics professor at an Ivy League school - that's the career he had chosen. His service in the state legislature was only part-time, a noble title with the power to make change in tiny increments.

She always realized the depth of Jed's commitment and the strength of his dedication, but until she began her own campaign, Abbey had never met so many people directly affected by her husband's good will. She was proud of him for her own reasons. They adored him for theirs.

"Abbey? What didn't you know?"

"That you'd be so helpful," she finally replied. "I don't think you're ever happier than when you're helping people. I understand now why you're the politician in the family."

"You trying to manipulate me again?"

"Not this time. The long hours at the hospital made me miss quite a bit around here. I'm finally catching up and seeing this side of you is eye-opening."

"Now that isn't entirely accurate. It's not like you're new to this. You and I debate policy quite a bit. We argue over bills you think I should support, over ones you think I should introduce. You've been involved in every single one of my campaigns."

"Not to this extent. I know everything you did for this community. I was there, helping you sort out the pros and cons of different proposals and projects that would help these people, but talking to them individually gave me a whole new perspective."

"Why?"

"It was seeing the result of what you do when you're in Concord. Minus the politics and legal jargon, it was seeing, first-hand, the impact you've had on the lives of these residents. It's amazing."

"Why are you telling me this?" The timing piqued his curiosity even more.

"Because it's all true. You're going to win this election and I'm going to be there with you every step of the way."

"You've been out there for a couple of weeks now. Why tonight? Why is it suddenly so important for you to tell me how much you believe in me?"

"Because last night, you thought that I might support someone other than you in this election...and the fact that you thought it, even for a split second...it scared me."

The sincerity of her confession wasn't lost on Jed. He delicately tucked an index finger under her chin and lifted it. "I lost my head. I know how much you love me. I do."

"You said Leo doesn't always know it with Jenny. I don't want you to ever doubt it from me."

"I won't, Abbey."

"I'm sorry I left you vulnerable to Jake Tillman."

"I can take Jake, especially with you on my side."

"I'm always on your side. I may disagree with you now and then, but I'm always going to be in your corner, no matter what."

"I know."

"I always believed in you. I just always thought you knew it."

"I did. But it sure is nice to hear it from time to time."

She stole another kiss and stroked his cheek before she turned suddenly and leaned back against his chest. "You sure you want to do this? I won't be upset if you back out."

"I'm sure. I really am."

"Where were we?"

Jed pointed to the map as Abbey prepared to mark it accordingly. "Look at District Three in Sullivan County. On Elm and Pine Streets, you've got a group of cops who lobbied the legislature for stricter drug laws last year. Your canvasser is wasting time there. Try Cottage Street instead..."

TBC