A/N: Leaving past replies intact.
Regarding to the KiraXLuna issue, no, I will not do a KiraXLuna fic, and no amount of suggestion in the reviews could change my mind. The main reason is that: the focus of the fic was mainly on the politics in Destiny; not the romance, and my alternative version of what could have occurred. If you want to make your own, feel free. But I would like to request that you not literally copy my fic and just change the names. That's lazy and is a plagiarism.
Regarding the pairing, I liked the canon pairing. I don't see any problem with it. So please no demanding, threat, or what say you. Write yourself if you want it.
This fic will become AU starting the events on episode 30 and will have certain reference to some major events occurring in episode 32 until 35.
Choices
Athrun
Written by Izzu X Izumi Ishtar
o
o
It was not even three days and they ended up moving again. This time, they were heading towards the Eurasia region.
He was frustrated. No, call it frustrated and angry. And it was not just because of Kira's unexpected visit a few days ago. That, if it counts to anything... was more of his fault than Kira's. He was the reason Kira came. But that did not mean that he was mad with Kira. Not after the chaos that occur soon after his departure. Chaotic events arising from those people on Gibraltar who easily dismissed Rey and Shinn's punishments over the Extended girl issue but fussed about why they could have let Kira escape easily. Who or what he should believe... it has become so confusing!
He was taken aback. It was only two years... has ZAFT changed so much? How could Durandal have so much power and influence like this? Do none of the other officers in ZAFT administration have a say against that man? Then again, it was not as if he could have a say on it. His father was already dead... Mr. Siegel Clyne too. As well as a number of good officers he used to know in the past. He no more had an inkling of what went on over the administration.
Come to think, how did Durandal manage to pull that trick with Meer? Since the last war... Lacus, Kira, the crew members of Archangel and Eternal as well as himself had gone into hiding; not allowing even a bit rumor slipped out over their whereabouts. So it should be strange after all that if any of them would have suddenly reappeared. But why did no one questioned it? Was the Chairman's influence that strong?
Athrun shook his head as he had to satisfy himself to just sit in the deck, since he had nothing else to do. After all, Saviour had been completely crippled.
It was his fault anyway. Kira has all the right to be mad at him. He should have been the one protecting Cagalli instead of stopping Kira to do the same. Laughable. Wasn't he been given that FAITH badge and should have the authority to do what was right? Unbound by the normal military orders? He should be able to do something should he find a strong reasoning to back his decision. That... he should have.
Suddenly he felt so stupid. Was if the things Kira said had been true? Was he now a puppet to the new ZAFT administration? The Chairman might have been saying so many idealistic things, or even argued about having the same beliefs as the late Mister Clyne. But what if all that had been just a ruse, and there was something darker in his plans to achieve that peace he had been talking about?
Alarms were suddenly sounded as every crew scrambled. Almost everyone have gathered around.
xxx
He could not believe what he was seeing. That enormous machine had easily wiped out a portion of the city. It was too big, how could anyone actually move it or even fight in it? Athrun looked on in alarm. There were still someone trying to fight off that monster of a mobile suit. It was... Freedom and Archangel! But... how... it was foolish! How could they foolishly risking their lives like this! Athrun thought of Kira, Cagalli... and everyone inside Archangel. Would he be able to see them alive again after this?
Athrun ignored the occasional stares he felt coming at him from the people around the room. They were all still so green. He doubted they would be able to realize the full situation of what this war could bring. And what implication that would bring to them. War was not just about taking down your enemies. If you think of it like that, what makes you different than other people? Was the thing you wanted to protect was more important than the things your opponent wanted to protect? How do you judge that?
Athrun anxiously watched the battle as Impulse joined in alongside some other MS from EAF. But suddenly, Impulse took a sudden stop and ceased fighting that giant MS. He even stopped... Kira. Why is it? And even that big one stopped fighting...
Athrun gasped as Destroy started to go berserk again before Freedom finally dived in and stabbed the beam saber into that MS. That giant MS exploded... somehow he wished he would not have to witness such thing ever again. What was EAF's fascination in creating gigantic machines for battle? Does might... mattered in size? Was all this destruction worth all of this suffering?
He was glad Kira defeated that thing. If Kira failed and that thing persisted, what could have happened to this world? Could this war even be ended?
xxx
So it was that girl that piloted that huge MS. So that was the reason Shinn was acting very emotional. He sighed as he watched Shinn walked away, wearing that hateful scowl. He had overheard from the others than Shinn did a mock funeral ceremony for the girl. So he deserved to be sad... but the casualties of this battle was not that girl alone. There were many citizens out there as well as brave soldiers that have lost their lives. What Kira did... you should not have faulted him. If Kira had not defeated that machine, even more lives would have been lost.
But did Shinn cared about that?
Yes, they were soldiers. But they were no god. As much as you vowed to protect the ones important to you, it did not mean you could always be able to do it. As much as you want to protect the many lives that depended on you, you cannot avoid not being able to save all. It should be the same anywhere, for anyone.
It should be the same as during that time in Onogoro. That time when Kira had protected Orb on his own... before he could come help. None of them could have known that Shinn's family had been down there. That time... the normal citizens were all thought to have fled to the refuges. How could Kira be able to know about that? Shinn should have been able to understand. No matter how hard you want to protect, you cannot protect everyone by your self. People cannot be that perfect. Not even Kira.
But... as much as he would want to make this clear to Shinn, he doubted the lad would listen. Then again, it was not as if Kira had a choice to choose where to battle. None of them do.
Athrun entered their rooms to find Rey and Shinn busily analyzing Freedom's battle footage. Saying it was just for practice. But Kira was not an enemy! Archangel also! He doubted there would be anyone else who could have fought as skillful as Kira to warrant such argument. He had a bad feeling about this. It is not just about doing their supposed jobs. Shinn was probably plotting his own revenge...
...on Freedom.
xxx
He was right. He hated it when he was right.
Minerva received orders to pursue and attack Archangel; not long after the chairman made that worldwide announcement. What were they thinking? To think just recently Archangel had helped them in Berlin.
Archangel have not attacked ZAFT unprovoked. Even if they did messed the battlefield in the past, they never took any side. They were not part of LOGOS either! Then why attack them?
It was not because he have attachments to the people in Archangel. Even if that was one of his concerns. After what they did in Berlin, shouldn't they be allowed at least a temporary truce?
Athrun gritted his teeth as he watched the battle unfolded before him. Kira was out there fighting alone. Archangel too! And what he was doing? He was standing here doing nothing while his best friend was fighting for his own life out there. He had this bad feeling. He prayed that it was for nothing. Yet, he could not shake the bad feeling especially since seeing that expression Shinn wore. There was something sinister conveyed between Shinn and Rey. Athrun feared for his friend, as well as everyone in Archangel. He feared for their safety...
xxx
To say that his world had just shattered, that was taking it very mildly. Athrun felt as if he was himself being stabbed when he saw Impulse giving Freedom the final blow. He recalled his father telling him that both Justice and Freedom had been equipped with Neutron Jammer Canceller to allow nuclear power to be used on both mobile suits. He knew what could have happened should the nuclear reactor inside Freedom exploded. The explosion would be greater than another other mobile suit could have exploded. That kind of explosion... it was unlikely that anyone could survive. And to depend on luck... how many people could have been so lucky?
He looked up as tears already began pouring from his eyes. As the smoke cleared, he could see only Impulse remained... as pieces of what used to be Freedom scattered around. Athrun screamed out Kira's name.
He felt sick. He stole a glance to his side to find Lunamaria equally in shock. But more sickening was Rey Za Barrel's victorious smile of triumph. His knees could barely hold him as they began shaking, uncontrollably. Lunamaria caught him before his legs failed him. He fervently hoped this was all a dream. He really hoped it was really a dream...
"You've killed because someone got killed. You got killed because you had killed...
Will that bring an end to the war?"
You're right, Cagalli... This will not end the war.
Freedom exploded. Kira was in it. Not again. He had almost lost Kira before... when he thought he really had killed him when he self-destructed Aegis on Strike. He did again... almost lose him after Jachin Due's second battle.
He already lost so much people. His mom, Rusty, Miguel, Nicol... his father. Please do not let him lose Kira as well!
Athrun Zala cried. The fact that the second explosion hinted as well as the fate of everyone else on Archangel did not comfort him. Please no!
xxx
If he could, he would have landed a few more blows on Shinn. Or even Rey. What was it about following orders blindly... shooting anyone who was the enemy just because your superior said it. When he had enlisted as a soldier, it had been to protect the ones important to him. It was never about revenge, not only revenge. Revenge will never recover the lives that had been lost.
What payback? This was not a game?
"What was it that Athrun was fighting for? For medals... or your father's orders?
Athrun Zala of ZAFT!"
Athrun clenched his fist tightly. He started seeing what Lacus tried to make him realize before. And the shadow of that answer he desperately tried to reach, had began to appear. But was it too late? Kira was gone...
"Captain Zala!"
Athrun turned around as Shinn stood before him. Said something about the chairman requesting to meet both of them. Athrun gritted his teeth. After some more revelations from him, what more that man wanted from him? Did he seriously think that the war would really end just because he have pointed out the true culprit? Would that true culprit be the only enemy Durandal would point out after this?
Athrun just followed silently as Shinn took him to meet the chairman.
xxx
Athrun recalled the words Dulllindal said when they first met. If those words had been true there shouldn't have any more new weapons being made. Be it mobile suits or armors. If you truly want peace, you shouldn't need too many weapons. The weapons would only worsen the situation. If Durandal's intention was true...
Then, what was the reason that these two new gundams were made? If he hadn't planned for this to happen eventually?
Athrun glared towards Meer. If only he could say out the truth now, that this girl beside the chairman was not Lacus. That Kira's refusal to ally with them was because of the suspicions raised. How could he say all that aloud now... when he was risking his own safety in the enemy's territory?
"Athrun... what's wrong? You looked disturbed...", said Durandal as Athrun glared at him.
As if he could even pretend to be excited. Wordlessly, he left the warehouse to get some air. It did not seem that it would be safe for him to stay here anymore...
xxx
"Meyrin... do you think what we're doing was right?"
Meyrin looked up to her sister as she cocked her head at her. "Huh? What do you mean... sis?"
Lunamaria shook his head.
"I don't know... it's just, since that time when Kira Yamato came here. I had been thinking things. And I started to wonder about Shinn. He... changed a lot since the start of this war..."
"Took you a long time to realize that, sis!"
Lunamaria stared at her younger sister strangely. But before she could say anything, someone suddenly entered their room. To their surprise, it was Athrun.
xxx
Athrun grimaced as he turned towards the two befuddled sisters.
"What's wrong?" Lunamaria started to ask as Athrun shrugged.
"I guess... I couldn't stay here any longer."
Lunamaria was about to ask again before the door was knocked loudly. It was the security people! Athrun looked around in alarm.
"Shit! Sorry for this... scream after I go-"
Lunamaria stopped him from jumping out of the window before shoving Athrun into the cupboard. Meyrin started to unbutton her clothes to make it seem she had just bathed but Lunamaria screeched at her before throwing herself towards her. The door finally gave in and the security barged into the room, as Luna hastily grabbed a towel to cover her sister.
"What are you doing? Barging in here?" Luna asked as one of the looked at her questioningly. She started to roll her eyes at them as she exclaimed. "My sister was just about to go the bathe when you barged in! Have some sensibility!"
"They why don't you say anything?" one of them asked as Luna shouted.
"As if I'd tell! Get out you perverts!" she cried out as the men hastily left the corridors. Luna closed the doors behind her before collapsing. "What did I just do?"
Athrun walked out of the closet as he apologised profusely.
"Sorry... it's because of me-"
"What happened?" She asked again as Athrun shrugged.
"Somehow the chairman found out I had been in contact with Kira and the others before this. And I didn't just mean only that time at Minerva. Then again, I wouldn't be surprised if he had been suspicious already when Kira came to Minerva."
Lunamaria bit her lips as she recalled what she had done and heard that other time.
"Sorry for this-"
"No." Lunamaria turned towards her sister as Meyrin ran towards her computer. "Athrun. You'll need help running away. I'll set off an alarm to divert the security to another direction-"
Lunamaria stared at her in horror. "Are you crazy, Meyrin? If we were found out-"
"Then do you want Athrun be killed?"
Luna blinked. Without any more words she ushered the two out of the room.
xxx
Rey was just returning to the residential bunkers before noticing a car passed by the truck he was in. But the car was not that suspicious looking and he did not notice the driver inside. But then, an alarm was sounded.
xxx
"I'm sorry... Athrun. It was my fault. That other time when you went to see Kira and Cagalli, I followed you."
Athrun waved her concerns away. "Don't worry about it. Even if he hadn't found out about that, he probably was expecting it when he set Kira to come to Minerva. That was probably a trap for him... and me."
Luna bit her lips again before stopping the car near the warehouse. She looked around to see if there was any cameras.
Meyrin gasped as Luna shoved her towards Athrun.
"Take care of Meyrin. I'll try to distract any pursuers if there's any..." She rolled her eyes at Athrun. "I saw Rey earlier! I don't think he noticed me... but can't be too careful. And it'll get dangerous for Meyrin too!"
Athrun stuttered before Luna ran off elsewhere. He turned towards Meyrin before shrugging.
"Let's go!"
xxx
Athrun looked up towards the purple GOUF in front of him. "I guess I can't be choosy..."
Before he could say anything more, several gunshots missed them by inches as Athrun and Meyrin took cover. Athrun looked around as he saw the fleeting image of one Rey Za Barrel. "Rey!", cursed Athrun as he took out his gun and shot back at him.
"Is this the path you've chosen? Traitor-!", cried Rey as Athrun hollered back.
"Wait! Meyrin's here! Are you gonna shoo-"
Several more shots convinced him that Rey wouldn't be letting both of them free as he pulled Meyrin towards safety. Several other shots was aimed towards Rey from another direction. Athrun gasped.
That must be Lunamaria!, he thought as he shot at Rey again. Rey backed off as Athrun took the chance to get Meyrin and himself inside the GOUF. They were barely inside before Rey recovered and started shooting at them. Hurriedly starting the machine for launch, Athrun turned towards Meyrin.
"I'm sorry about this... but we're launching!"
/END of Choices/
az: Ended up changing the end. Aside from rewriting some of the childish narrative, I realized that despite I had Luna have more backbone than in canon, she was a bit out of character. So I'll follow the canon plot on Meyrin, and won't have Luna being in the GOUF. I find it was much better to have Luna stay. We'll see how this change will affect 'Decisions'. It will not be exactly like in canon of course. Then what's the use?
