Killua sat at the stool on the farthest edge of the bar, the one most veiled in shadow and closest to the wall. It also happened to be the exact place Gon had been sitting on the night they first met.

Killua felt like total shit. Yes, he was being dramatic, he knew that. But… still. He felt so… lonely. A stupid emotion, he only saw Gon at the beginning and end of the day! But… for some reason just the knowledge that he'd see Gon at the beginning and end of every day had been comforting in a way. Now he'd never see Gon again.

However, that was for the best. Gon, a person so full of life and light, didn't need someone like Killua, someone full of darkness and death, there dragging him down.

Then why do I miss him so much?

Killua's mind was stuck in a constant loop: think of Gon, missing Gon, regretting not having gone with him, reminding himself that he was bad for Gon, reminding himself that Gon didn't need him, realizing that he needed Gon, reminding himself that Gon didn't need him, and finally sinking into a state of emotional darkness. Then he would think of Gon, feel a little better, and the cycle would start all over again.

What's wrong with me? We weren't even friends! Even though I wish so much that we were…

It was now midday. Killua had been sitting at that stool ever since he and Gon had parted ways. He had been sitting here for about four hours now. For once in his life… he had started to feel complete.

Killua remembered the whole thing with the spoon. Right when he had felt that their relationship had been bordering on unofficial friendship, Gon had to leave and continue his journey. Killua could never hate him for it, that was who Gon was. He just wished he could have gone with him. Then again, it would be bad for Gon if Killua went with him.

Here we go again. That same cycle.

Killua slammed his head against the bar. Again. Again. Aga-

A hand came in between his head and the wooden surface.

Killua looked up through his white locks. Knov was there, looking down his nose at him. His usually emotionless face was painted in… was that sorrow?

"Come on, Killua," he simply said, and headed in the direction of the office. The Valkyrie got up and followed him, having nothing better to do.

The office was dark and cozy, just like the rest of the Clawthorne. It was equipped with a fireplace alight with a lazy orange flame, a dark oak wood desk, soft red filigree patterned walls, and a plush black carpet. The walls were decorated with various plants and sketches of plants framed in silver frames. There were two fluffy, royal blue armchairs across from Knov's desk, with an unlit standing lamp and small coffee table in between them.

Killua fell back into the armchair nearest to the fireplace. Knov sat down in his dragon-skin office chair behind his desk, and rested his elbows on the table, lacing his fingers together in front of his face. He was clearly waiting for Killua to speak.

Killua would not speak.

He leaned back in the chair, and taking this rare opportunity to be completely comfortable, unwound his tail from his waist. He freed it from his shirt and wrapped it neatly around his legs, which were bunched up to his chest. Killua put one hand behind his head and with the other fiddled with the fabric of the chair. He felt Knov's eyes on him, beckoning him to share his thoughts. But Killua wouldn't do that. Knov was just his boss.

And no matter how much I wish he were a family away from home… he isn't. People don't need me. And I don't need people.

They sat there like that for an entire hour, before Knov finally said something: "Killua. I know you regret your decision."

"What decision?" Killua asked in a raspy voice, deciding to play dumb.

"Don't play dumb with me."

Killua lowered his gaze. He felt so stupid. Why was he so worked up over one boy?

"He doesn't… need me there. Dragging him down. But I just… I just wanna be friends with Gon." Why did I say that?

Knov's expression changed, it softened and his eyebrows tilted up. Suddenly the door opened and in walked Palm and Morel. They went to stand on either side of Knov's chair. Normally Killua would be frantically concealing his tail, but he couldn't muster the energy to care.

"Killua," Morel started, the silver haired boy felt as if he was being sat down for a lecture with his parents. "We know that you do not have a very good self image. We also know that you believe you can handle life all by yourself, and you're doing a splendid job of it so far. However, we also know you. You've been living with us for almost 9 months now, and we know when you are sad. We also know what is good for you. Palm and I do not know as much about your situation as Knov does, but from what we can tell you are on the run from a tough situation. You were looking for stability, and you found that here with us. We are all three touched that you found a home in us and let us get close like you did, and as hard as it is to say, you need to go live. Go out there and adventure, you need to go catch up with Gon. This simple life may be happy and quiet, but we know you and your personality, and know that the life you truly crave is one of adventure and thrill seeking."

Killua looked at Morel with wide, shimmering eyes. He was getting so many heart-to-hearts today…

"Killua,"Palms said in her smooth voice, "I know this may sound strange coming from me, especially considering that I do not know Gon at all, but you know that I can read people with this stone in the center of my forehead, yes?"

Killua nodded.

"I read Gon's heart, he is a boy seeking adventure and thrills. He left home to search for the stability that comes with knowing who you are, however in his search for stability he has lost his sense of it entirely. He wanders aimlessly, searching for his father, but finds himself more and more lonely day by day. The two of you have only known each other for a week and a half, however I can tell that he needs you just as much as you need him. Gon needs someone to be there for him, to balance out his impulsive side, to be the brain to his brawn. You need someone to keep you out of your head, to push you out of your comfort zone, to be the emotional light to your emotional darkness. You know that you need Gon, however you fail to accept that Gon needs you as well. Hear me when I say: you are the person Gon needs most in his life right now."

Killua's eyes widened, his breath was strangled in his throat.

It- this can't be right- how could someone like him need someone like me? How could-

Knov's warm timbre freed the Valkyrie from his thoughts, "Gon and yourself have the potential to be the closest of friends. You only find someone like that once in an eternity, Killua. Don't let him slip through your fingers. You wanna be friends with Gon? Well I say you already are. Gon sure seems to think so anyways."

Killua knew his eyes were serving as windows into his rawest emotions right then, but he just couldn't keep his mask up any longer. He was sitting up in his armchair and leaning towards the three adults, his tail swishing around his legs.

"You really think-" Killua started.

"Yes," Palm and Knov said at the same time.

"Go live your life, kid," Morel said with a smile.

Killua tentatively stood up, tail swishing back and forth behind him, a translator of his emotions.

"Kid, we know you have trouble accepting that people care about you," Morel said. "But just know that we see you as a part of the family. This will always be your home, and you can always return here."

Tears pricked in the corners of Killua's eyes.

"Come'ere," Morel murmured with a soft smile.

Killua all but leapt into the embrace of the Goblin. Palm and Knov joined in, and Killua had never felt more accepted than he did in that moment, in the quadruple embrace of his unofficial family- no. Official family. These three adults might not have been his blood, but Knov, Palm, and Morel were like a father, mother, and uncle to him. They cared about him so much more than his real family ever had, and Killua cared about them too.

The embrace broke, "Thank you guys," Killua told them with a teary smile.

"Any time," Morel said good naturedly, trying and failing to hide his tears.

"You're always welcome here," Knov told him as he patted Killua affectionately on the head.

"We'll always be here for you," Palm said with a nod.

Killua gave the three of them the brightest grin he'd ever made, and ran out the door of the office with a wave. The three adults watched their emotionally adopted son dart out the door in a flash of fluffy white hair.