POOR GEORGE

Summary: Lots of stories have been written about Rimmer finding out that the crew died. What about George McIntyre, who was around when the crew died, and had to be deactivated so Rimmer could be generated? Please R&R!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters but, boy, I wish I did, because this situation and these characters are brilliant. Rob, Doug, you guys rock!

CHAPTER 2

Someone was left? Who was it? How could anyone survive? Maybe someone was on the cargo decks. After all, the hold was lined with lead to keep the cosmic radiation out. If someone was there, and if they'd managed to get into an environment suit, then maybe they could survive the accident. There was a glimmer of hope; perhaps all was not lost for the crew of Red Dwarf.

"Holly, who is it?" George asked. He was already headed for one of the lifts. "Take me down there." As the lift moved, he ran through the list of possible crew members in his mind. Who would have cause to be in the cargo hold? Olaf Petersen, maybe. He was catering officer. If he had been trying to get some stores for the kitchen…

"Here, George," Holly said as the lift stopped and the door opened.

"Holly, there must be some mistake," George said. "This isn't the cargo deck."

"The survivor isn't on the cargo deck, George," Holly told him. "The survivor is in stasis."

"You mean, someone managed to get into a stasis booth before they were wiped out?"

"No, he was already there."

Already in stasis? Now, that seemed familiar. There'd been a bulletin on the shipwide network about someone being put into stasis for keeping a pet. Who was it again? All this time, George had been walking around the deck, towards the stasis booth. He turned a corner, and saw who it was. "Holly, are you joking me?" Dave Lister. Of all the people that could have survived, it had to be Lister. Lister, the man who ate curries for every meal, the man who bit off his toenails instead of using a clipper, the man who could use his guitar strings both to make sounds somewhat akin to music and to floss his teeth (and both actions sounded remarkably similar). Of all the people, of all the crew, it had to be Lister who made it. How unfair. It could have at least been someone he was fond of. It could have been Joe's wife – George would have liked that considerably. "So, what do we do with him?" George asked.

"We leave him there," Holly said. "It's not safe to let him out."

"Why not?"

"Because, the radiation levels are still too high."

"Well, can't you flush the radiation out? We have the equipment to cleanse asteroids of radioactivity for mining. Why not the ship? I specifically remember that there is a system meant for just this purpose." He looked around at the piles of powder on the floor. "Well, granted, maybe not for this exact situation," he amended.

"I'm afraid it's not working, George."

"Why not?"

"Second Technician Arnold Rimmer was supposed to repair a porous circuit in it last week, but he never got around to it."

Rimmer again. "Did Rimmer have any good qualities? Could he do anything right?"

Holly said, "If you want me to do a search, I can, George, but I imagine it'll take upwards of two weeks." He paused. "And I wouldn't be surprised if we didn't get any results."

"So, how long will it take for the ship to be safe?"

"Three million years, or thereabouts."

"Good work Rimmer," George mubled. "I never liked him before. But now I despise him. I mean, I tried to be supportive. He wasn't an academy student. He was trying to get through the hard way. I dare say, when I first met him I respected him a little bit. But that was before he proved to be worthless at ordinary tasks, killed the crew, and set us up on a 3,000,000 wait to be able to save the sole survivor of the accident! What an idiot!"

"Hey, speaking of Rimmer," Holly said, trying to drop the concept casually, "I want to switch you off and bring him back as a hologram instead."

George stared at one of Holly's monitors. Holly made an attempt to smile back. George didn't smile.