Darkness surrounded me. Dark were the spirits that caressed me in the night. I lay there, whimpering. My body felt lifeless. As though I couldn't move. But I didn't want to move, so I barely did. The only thing moving was my stomach. Up and down, it went. Barely moving, barely breathing. I wished Jin was by my side. His strong voice chasing away the darkness. The evil that was surrounding me. I don't like the dark.
I had tried to ask Jin to stay but I didn't know how. I couldn't form the words. Ever since he left for the second time, I cried. I cried out in my head, with no answer but that of The Voice. "I can see why you're afraid. It's because in the darkness you will fade. That you and I both know. Only the darkness will let the sprits come. The spirits that will devour your flesh. We don't know of time. But we both know it will happen. It will come." More whimpers passed from my lips and to shut myself up, I closed my eyes and pretended not be afraid, not to be paranoid, not to be listening. I'm not good at pretending.
My attention was brought back to my reflection. The picture of her still in my head. But who was that creature the stood beyond her? Why did it come? What was her name? Did she even have a name? What is my name? "What makes you think you have a name? Jin calls you Mother. Why would anyone else matter?" The Voice is being kinder than usual. Usually It talks mean to me. Somehow tonight was different.
Michelle never really called me anything. Where did she go when she was not with me and Jin? I hadn't seen her much since Yakushima.
Hours passed and no sleep came. I only lay there, whimpering in the night. Whimpering until the sun arose yet still I lay there, trembling and whimpering, though my voice rasp. I was happy and grateful to see my son when morning came.
