Disclaimer: Yep... I still don't own Zim. Such a pity...

Wow, I've already got four reviews. I wasn't expecting that many so quickly. Thanks, guys. It looks like the popular vote is for a DATR... which I must say is what I'm leaning towards. GypsyWolf, I have to disagree with you. DATR can work, if written by a competent author, and developed well. But, don't despair yet, as I'm still not completely decided on the matter. Oh, and by the way, I can't promise I'll always update this soon, but I will try to update rather frequently. Well, I'm glad you all enjoy this, so without further distraction, let's get on with the show!

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She suddenly found herself awake. Her eyes were still closed, but she had indeed regained consciousness. And the first thing she noticed upon awaking was the fact that she was not lying face-first in the ground, and she couldn't smell the smoke or hear the sparks of her downed pod. She attempted to open her eyes, but found she was lacking the energy required to do so. Her body felt sore, and from the slight pain, she guessed one of her antennae was either bent or broken. She felt far too weak to move at all, so she just lay there for a while, trying to observe her surroundings without the use of her eyes. She could hear birds chirping from somewhere nearby, and the wind made a small whistle as it blew. She was lying on her back, and whatever it was she was lying on was not solid ground - it was soft, and rather warm, and she felt she could lie on it for years without ever feeling uncomfortable. A noise... some kind of thumping noise, could be heard in the distance. In fact... it sounded almost as if it was coming from a long ways below her... as if it was in the ground or something.

Finally, she felt she might be able to open her eyes, and she attempted to do so once more. This time, she managed to get them to small slits, but all that gave her was a blurred image of blue and black, with light coming from somewhere to the right. She closed her eyes again, slightly frustrated, and then tried to open them once more. This time, she was able to get them open far enough to actually view her surroundings, and what she saw surprised her.

First of all, she was indoors. A dark blue ceiling was above her, along with a lamp that seemed to come from somewhere behind. Lights dotted the ceiling, though none of them were turned on at the moment. To her right was an open circular window along with two other on the same wall, and from the nearest window the sun was smiling down upon her, its happy rays neither too bright or too warm. To her left was a blank computer screen, sitting on a desk littered with scrunched and scribbled upon paper. Not much else was in the room, making it seem rather bare. A couple of posters lay on the wall, and there was a small dresser with a statue of some sort atop it a little ways in front of her, but the room still felt barren. Several feet in front of her was a closet, but it was closed. The door to the room lay ajar on the far end of the left wall, and the thumping noise she had noticed before seemed to be drifting in from it.

Where the heck was she? How had she gotten here? What in Irk was going on? She had to get out of here, had to find a ship, had to get back to Irk, had to -

She stopped, as she heard a different noise. The sound of feet upon stairs. And now the sound of feet slowly walking across soft carpet. Someone was coming. Her antennae twitched, and her hands reluctantly squeezed together, as she anxiously awaited the coming entity.

A purple-haired head poked into the room, and squinting eyes opened slightly to gaze upon her. She stared back, not sure who it was she was looking at. The figure turned right around and slowly walked back the way it had came, as a sharp female voice shouted "Hey, Dib! Your alien's awake!"

Dib...? Why did that name sound familiar...? She had little time to ponder the answer to this question as she heard feet pounding up the stairs, and then sprinting down the hall.

A black-haired kid with glasses leaped through the door, his black jacket flying behind him like a cape. Part of his hair was pulled back, resembling a scythe, and he had a rather large forehead. A big goofy smile was currently plastered upon his face.

"Tak, you're awake!" he practically screamed in excitement, spit flying from his mouth.

Tak's eye twitched as the spit flew, and she looked at Dib quizzically. "Have we met...?"

Dib's legs were convulsing in their place as he said, "Yeah, a year ago? Remember? You came to my school last year, and we made fun of Zim, and then you turned out to be an alien, and then you tried to take over the world!" He said this as if it was good she had tried to take over his planet. His overwhelming excitement sickened her.

She narrowed her eyes, which had finally regained their strength, as she continued to stare up at him. "Dib... yes... You were the kid who knew Zim was an alien, right...?" Dib shook his head up and down like a puppy would wag its tail. Tak's eyes narrowed, and her lips managed to form a partial scowl. "You and your sister broke into my base, didn't you?"

This seemed to cut away some of Dib's excessive happiness. He cast his eyes to the ground, his face a combination of embarrassment and nervousness. "Ah... yes. Um... well, we... or um... I... didn't mean to cause any harm." He forced a small chuckle, and attempted another smile. "I guess I'm just a little too curious for my own good."

He looked back up, to see that Tak was still scowling at him.

"Um... but, that's in the past, right? And now you're here, in my room, too weak to move... on my bed..." Dib's eyes widened. "Oooh, that sounds bad. Uh, the point is, you're here now, and you can help me stop Zim with your awesome alien technology and everything!" His smile slowly grew excited again as he said this.

Tak's face remained stoic. "What in Irk makes you think I'll help you do anything?" She was starting to get irritated with this stupid human's unfounded excitement.

Dib's smile faded away once more. "Um... well... I dunno. I just kinda figured, maybe... since you hate Zim and everything, and I helped you out a while ago and all..." His voice had gradually died down to a mumble as the sentence had gone on.

Tak's scowl slid into a glare as his half-formed sentence came to a close. "Well, you thought wrong." Her arms had finally regained part of their former strength by this time, so she had painfully been lifting herself up to a sitting position while he had been speaking. She grunted in pain as she finally achieved the position she had been striving for.

"But... I..." Dib no longer looked at all happy, rather, he looked desperate. "I dragged you out of your crashed pod! I cleaned you up, and let you sleep in my bed... for two days! And I fixed your ship that you left behind while you were gone... of course.. I did that more for myself... but... that's not the point."

"You have my ship?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah! I fixed it up, too. I washed it, and waxed it, and vacuumed out the seat, and -"

"You do realize you talk far too much, right?"

"Yes... People tell me that a lot." said Dib, casting his eyes to the ground once more.

"Then I will take my ship and leave, so I can go tell The Tallest to destroy this miserable rock you call a planet." She pushed her legs off the bed, and tried to stand, but her legs crumpled beneath her, sending her to the floor, right at Dib's feet. Dib almost immediately reached down to help her get up - and he did - though she would have stopped him, had she had all her strength back.

"Well... I think before you leave you should rest a little more. You don't seem to be yourself yet..." He gently picked her up and put her back on his bed, but immediately shrank away after receiving another glare.

"I have no desire to stay in this filthy... house." She coughed. "I demand you bring me to my ship at once!" she said, her forceful yell sounding more like a pitiful squeak.

Dib sighed. "Look, I'm sorry Tak, but I just can't do that. You can't even stand... Just get some rest, and I'll bring you some food later."

And with that he left, before she could offer more resistance. She continued to glare at the open door for a while afterwards, but after a minute or two, she accepted her current predicament with a heavy sigh. She lay her head back on Dib's blue and fluffy pillow, and turned onto her left side. She always slept on her left side.

She wasn't entirely sure why, but she hated that stupid human Dib almost as much as Zim right now, even though he had done nothing unkind to her, and had actually helped her out. She sighed again, and put it out of her mind. She didn't care whether she hated the human or not. All of his race was doomed to either a life of slavery or death anyways. Her lips formed a small smile, as she thought of Dib and the rest of the humans in rags and chains, doing her bidding, while their pitiful cities burned down around them. And then she thought of Zim, bound and at her mercy, to be tortured for as long as she wanted... To be whipped and beaten... To be humiliated, as she had been... To be forever her play toy she could use to vent her frustration... With these happy thoughts in mind, she soon fell into a deep sleep, the smile still on her face.

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Tak awoke to the smell of food. Irken food. Her eyes snapped open at this realization, and she sat straight up in the bed. A crack of her spine proved that to be a bad idea, and she let loose a screech of pain. The pain subsiding, she looked to her left to see a very surprised Dib standing next to her, with a tray of food in his hand.

"Um, hello again." he said, his voice a little shaky. He thrust the tray out to her, and she quickly snatched it up. She hadn't eaten in a year, although she could have gone without food at least another six months. Choosing to not think about where the human had gotten Irken food, she shoveled it down her throat, not at all worrying about seeming rude or vulgar. Dib just stood there, seemingly transfixed with her movements. She could tell he was watching her the entire time. He just stood there with an odd look about his face, even after the food was gone, and she was wiping her mouth clean with his bed sheet.

Now that her stomach was full again, she turned her mind to the question she had discarded earlier. "Dib, how and where did you procure Irken food?"

Dib's eyes flashed back to life as he realized he was being spoken to. "Oh, the food?" She nodded slightly. "I got it from your ship. I asked it if it had any Irken food, and it said it had a food synthesizer." Dib thought for a moment. "You know, it seemed to become easier to work with once I told it the food was for you..."

Tak chuckled. "Of course it did. It is my ship after all."

"Oh, yes... of course..."

They sat there in an awkward silence for a minute, Dib looking rather embarrassed, and Tak looking contemplative. She was trying to think of a way for him to take her to her ship. She settled upon the direct approach once more.

"Hey, Dib. Take me to my ship."

He looked at her. "Can you stand?"

Tak pushed her legs off the bed again, and this time, her legs did not collapse. She stood to her full height, which was only slightly taller than Dib. She glared down at him, feeling more powerful from this change in perspective.

"Yes, I can. Now I demand you take me to my ship!"

"Yeah, yeah, okay. You don't have to yell. Follow me." said Dib, a little too easily. He was up to something...

She eyed him suspiciously as he led her out the door in his room, and down the stairs, into a moderately large living room. The purple-haired girl from before was sitting on a big blue couch, watching a humongous display screen attached to the living room wall. Tak grimaced as a fat pig-man with human worm-babies and pizza all over him greeted her eyes. She would never understand why humans watched that... 'television'.

Tak was led out the back door, and around to a much larger, and closed door. She watched as Dib pressed a few buttons on a panel nearby, which made the large door creak upwards, revealing a work room, with her ship in the center.

"My ship!" Tak squealed with joy, sprinting over to it. "Finally, I can get out of this worm hole! Ship, open up and let your mistress inside."

The ship didn't move.

Puzzled, Tak tried again. "Ship, open up and let your mistress inside!"

"No," came a voice that was definitely not the voice she had programmed the ship with, many years ago.

"What? How dare you defy your mistress! And why do you sound different?" She rounded on Dib. "What did you do to my ship?"

"Uh... well, you see... I wasn't exactly expecting you back... especially so soon... And your ship wouldn't listen to me when it had your personality in it... So I just kinda..." He gulped. "Overrode your data with my own."

Tak's eyes widened, and her hands balled themselves into fists. "YOU DID WHAT?"

"It still works... and you can always just put your personality back -"

Tak leaped at him. Her hands instantly wrapped themselves around the boy's throat, and she let loose a cry of rage. Gagging, Dib put his hands up to stop her, and after a slight struggle, he was able to pull his neck free. He pushed her over onto her back, his hands still around her wrists. She struggled futilely, and after she realized that wasn't working, she thrust her knee upwards, right into Dib's crotch. His eyes widened as all the air in his lungs escaped, and he collapsed onto his side, his legs squeezing together in an effort to stop the pain.

"Serves you right," said Tak, rising to her feet, and dusting herself off. "You wouldn't have come out of that one alive if I weren't in this weakened condition."

Dib, still rolling around on the floor in pain, could do nothing but moan. Whether that was in reply to her statement, or if it was just from the pain, Tak was never sure.

"Okay... so the ship doesn't recognize me as its mistress anymore... But I'll soon change that." She walked over to the ship, pressed a button near the bottom of it, and climbed inside. She looked over the display screen and controls, re-familiarizing herself with them. She pressed a few of the buttons, which gave her a screen asking for a password. She typed in her password, and pressed enter. The screen changed, telling her that her password was invalid. Frowning, she tried again. The same thing happened.

"Human, what is the new password to my ship?"

Dib had finally stopped rolling around, and was now sitting cross-legged on the ground, taking deep breaths. "It's... Mysterious... Mysteries..."

Tak lightly coughed in acknowledgment, and entered the code. She was greeted with this: YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS LEFT UNTIL SELF-DESTRUCT, HAVE A NICE DAY. With a gasp, Tak hurled herself out of the ship, and started to run for it, but she didn't get far, as she tripped over Dib and fell flat on her face.

3... 2... 1. An explosion shook the ground around her, and she felt dust and debris against her back. Coughing and sputtering, she rose to her feet and stared at the smoking remains of what was her ride out of this hell-hole. Despair began to overtake her when she heard a dark laugh from behind, and she turned around to see the purple-haired girl standing at the entrance of the room, a drink in her hand.

"Serves you right, Dib." said the girl, taking a sip of her drink, and slowly walking off.

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Isn't Gaz evil? I love her for that... I may try to hook her up too, but I'm not yet sure. I'll get back with you all on it... Hope you enjoyed that little bit of craziness.