Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. With Andrew gone, I assigned the campers a challenge of capture the flag. Harold proved that he has some mad trapping skills, and Kenny could not help but test them out, resulting in his death, again. Jack managed to grab the Gopher flag, after several failed attempts by his Bass teammates. Unfortunately, Bart had managed to sneak the Bass's flag out from their territory, thus winning another challenge for the Gophers.

Of more interest however, was the fact that Izzy realized that Heather had an alliance, and built her own team to counteract it. Cartman, however, sold Heather this info for a stake in her alliance.

Will Cartman use his new found power to control how the votes play out in the Gopher team?

Will D.J. betray Bridgette in order to meet his part of the deal with Chef?

And will Kenny ever live through an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!


(Cue Theme song)


"Good morning Campers!" Chris shouted as he pushed open the doors to the mess hall. Chris smiled as he walked in to the lodge, enjoying the weird looks he was getting from the campers.

"Chris," Geoff said, with more than a little annoyance, "Why are you trying to steal my look."

Chris was indeed dressed out like a cowboy. He wore a large black ten gallon-hat, black boots, and a black belt. Chris pulled out a revolver and fired up into the ceiling. He emptied the gun, leaving a circle of six bullet holes in the roof. The campers quickly backed up against the wall on the other side of the kitchen. No one in their right mind should ever give Chris Mclean a gun.

"I will explain your challenge when you get outside," Chris said as he walked back through the doors, "Though my outfit should give you a good idea of what it will be about."

"Man," Lindsey said as she walked back to her seat, "That was scary."

"True," Duncan said as he sat down, "But not as scary as Chef's food." He then looked around, "he must be preparing the slop in the kitchen.

Bridgette looked around for a second. "Has anyone seen D.J.?" she asked worriedly. Everyone looked around for the kind hearted linebacker, who was nowhere to be seen.


D.J. was standing in a corner of Chef's kitchen, watching Chef pace through the room looking for ingredients. As Chef scurried around the kitchen, D.J. noticed that the ingredients he was using would not make any known dish. He suddenly turned his attention back to Chef when the big soldier began to speak to him.

"Listen D.J.," Chef said as he began to chop up the banana peels, rotten apples, and old shoes, "I am going to make you so confident, that you won't think twice about jumping off a cliff. No more Momma's boy, D.J." When Chef poured the sliced ingredients into the pot, he took out a spoon and forced it into D.J.'s mouth. D.J. cringed at the horrible concoction. "What you are tasting is pride, boy. Keep stirring the pot while I go help Chris with the challenge."

"If Chef wants pride," D.J. pulled out his Momma Spice and sprinkled it into the glop, "Momma will show him pride."


D.J. silently snuck into his seat, as Chef prepared to serve the dish that D.J. had tampered with. Duncan, hoping to get some strength in him before the next challenge, took a bite of the horrible concoction. After chewing for a few seconds, he suddenly swallowed easily, and said in a shocked tone, "It tastes incredible."

The others were rather unbelieving at first, tasted the slop. All of their eyes widened as the food actually tasted good now. As the campers began to eat the now great tasting food. Bridgette noticed something.

"This tastes familiar," she said. D.J. suddenly began to sweat when he realized she might have figured out that he made the food, but the thought seemed to escape her, and she remained quiet. D.J. sighed when he remembered his and Chef's conversation the night before.


Bridgette: I remember tasting that food somewhere before. I just can't place where.

D.J.: I don't know if I can go through with Chef's plan. I really like Bridgette. And I am sure that my Momma would be disappointed in me for going through with this alliance.


As the Campers went out onto the main camp courtyard, they suddenly heard a chopper against the wind. Izzy prepared herself to face off against the RCMP, only to be shocked when Chris came up in an extremely large helicopter. Chris stuck his head out to explain.

"Today's challenge happens outside of camp," he said as the campers reluctantly went inside the giant aerial transport. As they took off, the campers all smiled as they left the horrible place that had already delivered so much torture on them. Even if it was just for one day.


"So cowpokes," Chris said as they landed in a run down part of Montreal, "How does it feel to be back in the city?"

"Ah, smog," Harold said fondly, before Duncan pushed him off the chopper. As the campers filed out of the helicopter, Chef drove out in a long open tour bus. The campers got into the vehicle, as it took them inside the old set.

"As you can see," Chris said as they drove around the set, "We are on a crummy, old, run-down, crappy film lot." The campers looked around for a second, and could not help but agree with him.

"While you are here," Chris continued, "You will be completing a challenge based on the old west. I will explain how when we actually reach the cowboy movie part of the lot. So, to pass the time," Chris then stood up, and began motioning to the left, "To your left, is the scene in the disaster movie, House of Flames." The campers turned to the left, and only saw a large smoldering pile of ash.

"It is just a pile of dust," Stan pointed out.

"I know," Chris said, "The house burned down in production."

The campers groaned as the host continued to explain the sets on the lot. This was going to be a long tour.


"Welcome to the western set," Chris said as the campers got off the bus, "This is the location of your next challenge." As the campers dismounted the bus, they saw that they were standing on actual sand, and that the buildings were real. "In today's challenge, the two teams will be assigned two very distinctive groups of people in the old west, the townsfolk, and the outlaws."

Chris smiled as he pulled out black and white hats. "The Bass will be the outlaws," he threw black hats to the Bass team, "And the Gophers will be the townsfolk." He then threw the white hats to the Gopher team. "In this challenge, the outlaws' job is to steal the bag of money from the bank in the town, and then escape. The money is held in a safe in the bank, which the outlaws must open." The host then pulled out a rifle. "Both teams will be equipped with firearms, which have been outfitted to shoot non-harmful lasers. If you get hit, there is a special material in you outfits that are going to be provided, that will drop you to the ground, unable to move."

"Since the Bass will be forced not only to come into town without the protection of buildings," Chris said, "They will be provided with more, and longer ranged, weaponry." While he threw some six-shooters to the Gophers, he threw revolvers and rifles to the Bass. The Bass will move out of this small nine block area, and prepare for the heist, while the Gophers will stay here to start making your positions."

The campers reluctantly went to their positions, and prepared for the epic battle that was about to take place. "Won't this be fun?" Chris asked Chef, who was wearing a dress. Chef angrily glared at the host, grabbed him by the neck, and dunked him in a water trough.


(Gophers)

"Obviously," Heather said as she began to assign roles, "I will guard the bank, since I am the only one who is smart enough to not be fooled by any of their tricks." She was wearing a customary white hat, blue shirt and brown kakis.

"No way," Nikki said, also wearing the same outfit, "You nearly cost us the challenge last time, we need someone who can actually pay attention to what is going on in the challenges."

"Fine," Izzy said as she walked in, "Why don't we let Owen guard the safe, he is so big that he would be pretty hard to beat in a closed in area." The others nodded with this statement, until they noticed Izzy's outfit. For some reason, she was wearing a Scottish kilt, and along with her revolver, she had a long sword attached to her back, and a bagpipe in her arms.

"Izzy," June asked hesitantly, "Why are you dressed like a Scotsman."

"Oh ya see laddie," Izzy spoke in a Scottish accent, "Me family didn't come to America until the days of the Wild West were over. So, the producer said I could dress in this as long as it had the special knockout linen." She then began to play a tune on the pipes, which caused many of the Gophers to cringe in pain. After Izzy finished playing, Brian looked around and noticed something.

"Has anyone seen Gwen?" he asked. Leela leaned into the girl's dressing room.

"Gwen," she shouted, "You have to come out some time."

Gwen sulked as she walked out of the changing room. She was now wearing a pale blue dress, with a white apron in front. She looked up into the sky and raised her hands into the air. "What cruel god would put me in a dress!" she shouted sadly, "Why am I the only one who has to wear one."

"Proobably Chris just trying to make life woorse for yoo than it alrrready is," Izzy said in her customary Scottish drawl. Gwen screamed in frustration at her predicament. Why did she ever sign up for this show?


(Bass)

"Okay guys," Geoff said, having changed his customary brown hat for a black one, "We need a plan to get that money out of the bank. Jack, Rick, Double D, Duncan, any of you guys have an idea."

"I think we should separate into three teams," Double D said as he pulled out a chart of the set, "The first team should make a headlong assault on the front of the set, hopefully drawing most of the Gophers attention. Then, the second team will sneak in a back way through the set, into the bank. They will try to break open the safe and get the money through the door of the safe. If by some chance the first two teams fail, the third team will attempt to cut through the roof into the safe, which is more like a bank vault than a normal safe. They will then transport the money, without anyone from the Gophers realizing what they are doing."

"Nice," Geoff said, "So, let's get our teams organized, and get ready to go rob a bank." All of the Bass cheered, particularly Duncan.


Duncan: What can I say; I was born to be in this challenge.

Double D: I cannot say I condone stealing. If mother and father watched this, I would have to preform another week's worth of sticky note delivered chores. But, I do not think they even watch TV. They are always so busy at work.

Kim: Look, as much fun as this challenge sounds, I am a secret agent. I really don't condone any of the actions my team will use during this next challenge.


Team one, made up of Geoff, D.J., Bridgette, Jude, Ezekiel, Tyler, Peter, Rick, Jen, Stan, Kyle, Eddy, Courage and Grim, entered the nine block set of the cow town. As they walked through the old wooden buildings, they heard floor boards creak. A second later, they saw a small red laser streak by them. The Bass all ducked for cover, as the street light up in bright lights. The Gophers had set up an ambush.

As Geoff hid behind a barrel, he noticed that Kenny was sniping at them from a balcony. When he tried to shoot the parka wearing boy, his revolver did not posses a long enough range to hit the boy. He then saw that Grim was hiding inside a store that he was sitting next to. Geoff, waved at Grim, and then pointed at Kenny. Grim, who had a rifle instead of a revolver, aimed it at the boy, and fired. The shot was accurate, as it hit Kenny.

Unfortunately, Kenny was leaning too far over the edge of the balcony when he was shot, and his now heavy clothes caused him to fall from the Balcony into a water trough. Kenny's muffled screams were gurgled by the water, and eventually the bubbles around Kenny stopped floating to the surface.

"Oh my God!" Stan shouted as he peaked his head out from a hay bail, "he killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" Kyle screamed while hiding under a chair.

"Prepare to die Kahl," Cartman shouted as he raced into the street, pistols blazing. The fat-boy unfortunately had run into the street without any cover. So the entire Bass team fired at him, causing the boy from South Park to fall to the ground immobile.

The Bass were then forced to dive back in to their hiding places for cover, as the Gophers let out a withering fire. As Geoff hid behind his barrel, he said to Grim, "I hope the others are having an easier time in this challenge than we are." For some reason, Geoff's hat was shot off his head, causing the cowboy to duck farther down in fear.


Geoff: How did Chris pay for these special guns, it must have cost a fortune.

Chris: Yeah, kind of bought all of it with Andrew's credit card. Since that kill joy is not around, he can't do anything to stop me. (Suddenly realizes he is bragging to a camera, with footage that Andrew will see) Oh crap!


Team two was made up of Dib, Double D, Ed, Morty, Duncan, Bender, and Harold. The seven silently entered the set in a back street, and, while nearly all the Gophers were concentrating their attacks on group one, they snuck up to the bank's porch. As they leaned their heads inside the wooden structure, they saw that Owen was snoring as he sat in a chair with his feet on a table.

The seven safe crackers tiptoed past the sleeping teen, and towards the vault, where Harold pulled out a stethoscope. As Harold began to pick the lock, Duncan accidently leaned back. This unfortunately caused the table that Owen's feet were resting on to collapse, because Duncan's added weight was too much for it.

Owen, suddenly off balance, fell to the ground, waking up with a start. As Owen stood up, he saw the Bass attempting to open the safe. The large teen reached for his pistol, only to realize it was actually on the table that Duncan had destroyed.

Owen, realizing he was outnumbered and outgunned, ran from the room screaming. Before he could get away, he was shot by Dib, and fell to the ground on the road in front of the Bank. The heavy teen had been successful in alerting the other Gophers, however, and they rushed to stop the bank robbers. While Harold and Double D began to pick the lock, Duncan, Dib, Morty, Ed, and Bender fired their rifles through the window while the locked the door. They were trapped.


"What are we going to do?" Geoff asked loudly as he paced in front of team one, "Team two is trapped, and if we try to help them, we will be sitting ducks!"

"Why don't we get team three to make their move," Bridgette suggested, "Team two can act as a decoy, while they get the loot by cutting through the ceiling."

"Good idea," Geoff said, before grabbing Stan by the collar.

"What the hell are you doing!" the boy shouted, and he was answered by Geoff tossing him up onto the roof of the bank. The other Bass just stared as the party lover.

"What the hell were you thinking!" Kyle shouted at Geoff. Geoff turned around and pointed at the roof, where Stan was talking to Jack, Kim, and Ron, the members of team three.

"Oh."


"So," Kim said as her hand grabbed the breach of her nose, "apparently team two is trapped, and we are going to have to bail them out, is that what your saying."

"Yeah," Stan said, as he continued to try to catch his breath.

"Well," Ron said as he pulled out a saw, "Let's get cracking. Hopefully the guys down inside the Bank will be able to hold them off long enough for us to steal the money." He suddenly looked up to see horrified looks on his teammates as they stared behind at something behind him. "Let me guess," he said nonchalantly, "One of the Gophers, most likely Izzy, is standing behind me, and has figured out our plans, and is now preparing to shoot me." The others nodded.

"Son of a freaking bi-"

Ron was suddenly hit with a laser, which knocked him off the roof. Luckily, his pants caught on an old nail. This led to an unfortunate accident where Ron fell out from his pants onto the ground. "Oh come on, even here in Canada I can't stay stop losing my pants!"

"I hoope yoo ready to loose," Izzy said, keeping her Scottish drawl. Just as she aimed the gun at Stan, Jack pulled out his sword and slashed the gun in half. Izzy responded by drawing out her long sword. "Prepare for a battle to the death Samurai Jack."

She then played a war tune on her bagpipe, which caused Jack to cover his ears in pain. In one quick motion, Jack stabbed the instrument, causing it to deflate. "You'll pay for that Laddie!"

As the two aces of the teams began to engage in another epic battle, Stan stared at Kim. "So does this mean that it is up to us to cut through all of this wood?"

"Pretty much," Kim responded.

"Shit!"


"Will you dorks come and help us!" Duncan shouted as he, Morty, Dib, Ed, and Bender attempted to hold off the entire Gopher team. Double D and Harold were trying their hardest to open the vault, but apparently there was not one, but five locks they would have to pick. While they had already finished the first three locks, they were having a lot of trouble with the fourth.

Dib suddenly saw Geoff, who was hiding behind a crate near an intersection of two roads. Geoff suddenly made a forward motion with his hand, and Peter, Rick, Grim, Tyler, Ezekiel, and Kyle charged out of their hiding places, towards the bank. The Gophers then switched their focus away from the Bass fortified in the bank to those without cover.

Peter, being the largest of all the people in the attack, went down first by a nice headshot from Gwen. As soon was hit, Kyle was picked off by Gwen. Just as the others were about to enter the bank, Tyler tripped, allowing Gwen to hit him too, while Rick, Ezekiel, and Grim managed to enter the bank safely.


Gwen: Got to say, I rocked this challenge. They way I did it was by imagining each one of them was Chris. And I was using real bullets… from a machine gun.


"What the heck are you doing here?" Duncan said as he hid below the window. Ezekiel then turned to the ex-delinquent.

"Geoff told us to tell you that plan A has been aborted, eh," the poor boy coughed, trying to catch his breath. Harold and Double D suddenly stopped working on the lock.

"So much for us being the heroes," Harold said sadly, before walking up to the doorway, and sticking his rifle through it.

"So that means were supposed to stay here, draw the Gophers fire," Duncan said, his eyes widening in realization, "and basically be sitting ducks."

"That's plan B in a *burp* nutshell," Rick said as he lined up his revolver from one side of the window.

"Son of a freaking bi-"


Duncan: I really am getting pissed off by Geoff. I mean, what have I done to you that basically makes me no more important than cannon fodder.

Geoff: You did the exact same thing to me two challenges ago. Revenge is sweet!


Jack and Izzy continued their duel on the roof tops, neither one giving an inch. Despite Jack's incredible techniques and skills, the sword was strong enough to withstand any attack he hit it with. Jack then noticed something familiar about the sword she wielded.

"Crazy Red-headed Girl," Jack said, trying to get her attention, "Where did you get that sword?"

"It's been in da family for years," Izzy explained, swinging the sword at Jack, "It first belonged to my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather four hundred years ago. His name has been lost to time, but the world knows him as the Scotsman."

Jack's eyes widened as he remembered a friend with the exact same nickname. He then realized on the sword were the same runes that had caused him so many problems during his first duel with the warrior from the north. It brought so many memories back, of the old world and a certain someone. Jack silently put his sword back into its scabbard, and then fell through a gap between buildings. Izzy growled when she realized that the Samurai had escaped again.

She suddenly saw Jack's rifle, and remembered the challenge. "Oh crap," she muttered, before rushing back to the bank, rifle in hand. The Bass's chance of victory began to slip away.


Well that went better than expected," Harold said happily as he was lifted, to the top of the bank, money in hand. Kim and Stan had managed to cut through the ceiling into the vault, and then helped get the remains of team two onto the roof. All they had to do now was escape the town, and they would be home free. Just as they prepared to make a run for freedom, a laser bolt shot out, striking Dib. They turned to see Izzy, standing on another roof top, wearing a smile that usually graced Chris's face. She suddenly fired another shot at the Bass, which hit Ezekiel.

"Alright," Izzy said as she pumped her fist, "two for two. And one of them is a cute prairie boy."

Kim suddenly jumped in front of Izzy, and knocked her gun away. "You guys take the money," she said, "I'll hold Izzy off."

As the remaining Bass escaped off the other side of the building, Izzy sucker punched Kim, who quickly recovered. "I have no time for you," Izzy said, "The only rival I have is Samurai Jack!"

"Well see about that," Kim said as she suddenly swipe kicked at Izzy's feet, which the crazy girl swiftly dodged.


Geoff was trying to understand what was going on. For some reason, he, along with all of the remaining Bass were running from the Gophers. From what he could understand, the remaining members of teams two and three had been ambushed by Izzy, and Kim was busy holding her off. Unfortunately, the Gophers had the Bass badly outnumbered, and were using those numbers to pick off the retreating Bass members. Even Jack and Rick were hit with a laser.

Just as Double D went down, the sock-hatted nerd threw the sack to Geoff, who was the last Bass member still standing. Geoff smirked when he saw that he was only a few yards away from the escape line. Just as he was about to cross it, he heard a shout from behind him. Gwen was rushing at him, rifle in hand.

It appeared to be too late however; Geoff was just about to cross the line. But before he could, a beaten form was thrown in front of him. It was the bloody and bruised body of Kim. Izzy cackled from the roof tops. When Geoff tried to dodge the falling body of Kim, Gwen tackled him from behind, pushing Geoff to the ground, and winning the challenge for the Gophers.

"Looks like the Gophers have won four straight," Chris said from a helicopter as it hovered over the fake town, "Not only do they win invincibility, they have also earned a 100 dollar gift certificate to their favorite store."

The Gophers let out a cheer of joy as they raised their weapons into the air, victorious. When Gwen jumped up in victory, she jumped over Geoff's head. Due to the fact that she was wearing a dress rather than her normal attire, Geoff certainly got an eyeful. Gwen then blushed when she realized what she had done, and helped Geoff to his feet.

"Okay campers," Chris said happily, "let's head back to that crappy island so we can vote off another of your sorry butts."


Geoff: There are a lot of people who messed up on this challenge, though I am forced to vote for the guy who got hit first.

Duncan: You sent me to juvie pal, and I am a guy who carries a grudge. I have a long memory.

D.J.: Sorry, but you are the one who seems to deserve it the most for your poor performance in this challenge.

Gwen: (Wearing MVC medal) I suppose I should be happy. I am tied with Morty for being the most valuable camper again, plus, the dress thing could have gone worse. It could have been completely ripped apart.


"Wow," Chris said as he sat on a stool during the ceremony, "And you guys are supposed to be the perennial winners."

"Shut it," Duncan spat.

"Fine, Marshmallows go to Geoff, D.J., Double D, Jack, Rick, Harold, Dib, Ezekiel, Morty, Courage, Jude, Jen, Bridgette, Bender, Ed, Eddy, Stan, Kyle, Tyler, Grim, Peter, and Kim did not receive a vote." They all caught their marshmallows happily, and began to munch on them. Both Ron and Duncan began to fidget with terror, as they realized that one of them would be going home.

"And the last marshmallow goes to…

…Duncan."

"What!" Kim shouted, as Ron sadly grabbed his bags and headed for the docks. As he hugged Kim goodbye, Ron waved to the rest of the Bass, and boarded the boat of losers. The Bass all returned the wave, even Duncan, although he did so grudgingly.


Geoff sighed as he walked back to the cabin. The Bass really needed to win the next challenge, or they would lose their numerical advantage. He then heard a whistle, and turned to see Gwen leaning on the porch railing.

"Hey cowboy," she said, smirking slightly before asking, "Liked what ya saw?"

As Geoff babbled incoherently for a few seconds, while Gwen laughed at his shyness, no one noticed a silent tune from the highlands was being played.

Izzy played a soft tune that her mother had taught her. The tune was apparently the song that her ancestor, the Scotsman, had played when he met his best friend. It was known to be lucky for the Fitz-Patrick family, and she played it every time she felt like she needed just a little more help in her life.

While she played, she failed to notice Jack, who was sitting in a near by tree. As the warrior listened to the tune, he began to reminisce on his friends he had once had on his original journey and the one person he had come to truly love.


Losers: Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Eddy, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron