Johnny drove home in silence. He didn't want any sounds to interfere with him. He was in a state of mind he had never been in before. He was more confused than ever. He kept playing everything over and over in his head but it seemed to still not make any sense. He understood Baby was grieving and he felt now was the time she would need him more than ever. He was grieving himself and all he wanted was to be with her to help take his pain away. Now Baby didn't even want him in her life. Johnny was having a hard time with that. He felt they had shared so much again. His love for her had never left and he knew that now but, did it leave on Baby's part?

If this was what Baby wanted he would respect her wishes. Even though it would kill him not to talk to her or see her he was bound and determined he would make it through it. But then again he thought could he? He had lost the daughter he really never got to know and now he has lost the love of his life. Regret was now setting in.

What if he had called Baby after the summer at Kellerman's? What if he had known about the pregnancy? He would have been there every step of the way. Things would probably be so much different now. He couldn't predict how they would be but he just knew his life would have gone down another road. He wanted to kick himself for not putting forth the effort to keep in touch with Baby. He had to understand that right when Baby left Kellerman's he was still unsure about how he felt for her. The more time would pass the more she would never leave his heart. It was now he had realized how much he really loved her.

Then Johnny would think about those breathtaking brown eyes that looked at him with such excitement. Josie's eyes were so beautiful. He hated the thought of never waking up again to seem her looking at him. He tried to understand Baby's motives for not telling him but he couldn't help but want more time with Josie.

He wished so many things were different. All he wanted to was to grow old with Baby and watch Josie grow up before his every eyes. None of this would happen now and Johnny had to understand that. He had lost everything………..


"Honey I wished you would eat something." Marge told Baby as Baby finally emerged from her bedroom.

"I am not hungry mama." Baby told her as she plumped down onto the couch. "Johnny gone?"

"He left about twenty minutes ago or so." Jake told his daughter.

"Baby do you think him leaving was a good idea? I mean you could really need him now." Marge sat down next to Baby.

"Mama, I have never felt so dead inside in my entire life. I can't even bring myself to walk into Josie's room. I couldn't deal with him right now." Baby confided in her parents.

"He is who you need the most right now Baby." Jake told her. "He wanted so much to be here for you."

"It's just what I had to do daddy." Baby said tearing up.

"He loves you." Marge had to say.

Baby squinted her eyes to try and block her tears. "We were left in the past. Now we have nothing holding us together."

"You love him Baby; that is all you need." Jake said as she walked and sat down next to Baby. "Don't turn your back on it."

"Your father is right honey. Now is the time you will need him more than ever. Baby I see the way you still look at him." Marge joined them on the couch.

"My life is not about Johnny it was about Josie." Baby told them. "Now my life is gone."

Baby rose to her feet and before her parents could stop her she disappeared into her room with the slam of her door."

Baby was trying to cope with Josie's death the best way she knew how. No one has ever died that Baby was so close to. This was all so new to Baby. She had never felt such sadness.


Johnny walked into his apartment and threw his duffle bag over in the chair. He left the room dark as he walked to the kitchen to get him a beer. He hadn't sat down good and the phone rang.

With a quick hello he soon recognized who was on the other end. "Becky?"

"Hey, how are ya?" She asked him.

"I am good and you?" He asked in return.

"I am ok I guess. I have been worried about you. I have been trying to call and check on you since your surgery." She spoke softly. "You just get home?"

"Yeah, actually about five minutes ago." He was a little uneasy.

"I just wanted to check on you and to tell you I was sorry for how I acted that night. I had no right to be that way to you." She told him meaning every word she said.

"I understand. I hurt you and I am sorry……for that…." Johnny's voice trailed off.

"Johnny what is wrong? Are you okay?" She could tell something was wrong.

"As good as I can be." He sighed into the phone.

"Johnny, tell me what is wrong?" Becky was growing worried at this point.

"My little girl didn't make it. She died early Tuesday morning." Johnny said as his voice began to crack.

"Oh, Johnny I am so sorry. Why are you here you should be with Baby." Becky said hating to say that but she understood how he felt.

"No, there is no me and Baby." Johnny's voice was getting more and more shaky. "I just met my daughter and I just lost her all in a matter of days."

"I wish there was something I could do or say that could take you pain away. I would do it in a heartbeat." Becky said wishing she could reach out to him from the phone.

"It will just take time to heal. I know I will be okay." He knew he was referring to both Josie and Baby.

"I think it was amazing what you did for Josie. You were a real man for standing up like that." Becky told him.

"Yeah but I couldn't save her." Johnny gripped the phone tightly. "Damn it I couldn't!"

"Johnny it wasn't your fault. You did everything you could. You had no way of knowing she would die. Don't blame yourself for anything." She had to make him understand that.

"It's hard not to." He returned short.

"Well, Johnny if you need me I am here okay." She offered.

"Becky?" Johnny spoke.

"Yeah?"

"I don't want to be alone right now." He could be alone. He would go insane.

"Johnny what are you saying?" She questioned him carefully.

"Please come over here." He said quietly.

"I'll be there in five minutes."