Chapter 16

Sawyer stormed into his tent and sat down. "Damn woman." He sulked for a while, pitying himself. But then she walked in. She had this faraway look in her eyes, and he knew that something had happened. He stood up immediately and took her in his arms, surrounding her small body. IShe looks so...fragile./I He thought. "What happened?" he asked her hesitantly, not sure if she wanted to talk. Sawyer had never been one for comforting people, unless it involved sex, which he seriously doubted would happen right now considering the look on her face.

But Kate just stood there, limply letting him hold her. She rested her head on his strong chest and could feel his heart beating. It was a soothing sound, and calmed her more than words ever could. After a while Sawyer guided her over to the seat and sat next to her, still holding her in his arms. Kate practically collapsed into the seat, and she wasn't sure what had been holding her up that whole time. She sighed deeply. "I have to tell you something." she said with no emotion in her voice.

Sawyer used one finger to lift her chin and look into her eyes. "Only if you want to." And he said this with more sincerity than he would have thought possible. She looked at his intensly, and her eyes filled slightly with unshed tears.

Kate glanced down and blinked several times. Sighing again, she straightened her back and breathed out. "Yesterday, before we...she glanced up at him...ya know. Anyways, before that, I told you that Jack took me to a waterfall, and we went swimming."

Here she paused for a long time, but Sawyer was determined to stay silent until she finished. Finally she spoke again, "He held my hand Sawyer." She sucked in a breath and waited for a comment. But other than feeling him stiffen slighty, nothing happened. "He held my hand all the way there and all the way back."

Then the rest came rushing out, "And when we were swimming, there were a couple of times that we almost kissed. And after we finished swimming, we lay on the grass together to dry off, and he tucked my hair behind my ear, and he looked at me-...she swallowed he looked at me, like I've never had any one look at me before."

After this tirade, she took a deep breath once again, "And I think he wanted to tell me, or that the day was supposed to lead up to something, like a declaration or something, and when I talked to him just now it was like... it was like kicking a wounded animal. He just looked at me...like he was...dead or something."

Kate burried her head in her hands and her curls fell around her face. And despite how much he hated what she'd just said, how much he hated Jack at that moment, he pulled her close, and felt her tears fall on his bare chest. It broke his heart to see her like this, but he remained silent, knowing she wasn't done. He could feel his anger raising deep within his chest. Not anger at her, or even at Jack, but at himself. He'd forced her to chose. He hadn't been able to stand the anxiety in the air every time she was around, or feeling like everytime he saw her would be the last time their eyes would meet. And he had forced her to choose. And though he would be forever thankful that the stress was over, and that she had in fact chosen him, he felt like an a for being the one. Hated himself for making her do something that was now causing her so much pain.

"I told him." she said through her shaky breaths. "Well...he already knew. But I confirmed it." Her hands finally lowered to her lap and she pulled one leg up over his legs. Her body relaxed slightly. " I hated having to tell him. I hated it. But I feel so...relieved. she breathed out It's finally over." And with this she finally looked up into his eyes and smiled.

Sawyer breathed out, and only then realised he'd been holding his breath a little. He smiled back and kissed her softly on the lips. Then he looked at her, "Everything will be ok. Promise."