A/N WHEEP! First Naruto fanfic! joy jump…random one-shot. Gaara can't sleep and lurches into a bizarre conversation with…no-one really…oh the angst. ( Anything in italics are song lyrics)

Disclaimer: sob I don't own Naruto or the song 'I'd kill to fall asleep' by New Found Glory

I'd Kill To Fall Asleep

'Eyes open, I'm wide awake

I feel I'm in a coma state

I'll lay here on my back and watch the fan turn'

Well…There's no fan…no nothing really. But everything else is pretty much the same. I can't sleep. Never have, never will. I guess I was just born under an unlucky star. I can't move. I feel so trapped by the tiredness that won't go away. I'm stuck in this pit of emptiness, the sleep just drifting away as my life does the same. Why me?

'Conversations cross my mind, but not that of the speaking kind

TV images repeat their one line.'

Well, not really. I have no TV. Just a bed, in a dirty attic bedroom. Or friends. What would be the point? They'd just desert me when the found out what I…am. Everyone deserts me, in the end. It is my fate, my destiny, to be alone.

'Back and forth I toss and turn

It feels like strings are holding up my eyes'

True. I'm rolling back and forth like a fucking idiot. It's not helping. It just hurts my back. Not that I really feel hurt. More like a dull ache. I can't close my eyes. They just stay open, staring at the sky through my grimy window. There aren't any stars out, and I can't see the moon. It is pure black, like me.

'I'd kill to fall asleep,

I'd kill o fall asleep'

I would. I really would. It's not like it would be a new experience. I'm already a murderer. Everyone knows. That's why they all keep their distance. But it's ok. I've grown used to my own company and no-one else's. Perhaps that why I'm so anti-social…

'I'm putting up a losing fight

I'll never see this end tonight

The thought of just one dream it consumes me'

It's true. I'm used to winning every battle I fight, but this is the one that overpowers me. I can't win. Just one dream. Just one chance to close my eyes and forget the world. That's all I ask for. But I will never get that. Perhaps there is another way to forget the world…

'Numbers on the clock turn back, my pills are having no effect

The beating of my heart keeps the time going'

Well, I don't actually own a clock but if I did the numbers would probably be rushing back. I'm not on pills, but everyone thinks I should be. I can see it in their eyes. Fear. I only have one memory of anyone not fearing me. Mother. I can't fathom how on earth I remember. I just sense a feeling of love, and her eyes looking down on me. Perhaps I should join her. It would probably be better for everyone. And for me. That way I could escape the world, and all the people in it. Yes. It is for the best.

'They say that when you sleep your body's at rest

I wouldn't know what sleep felt like if I tried my best

If polaroids and memories can fade away, so can I...'

Yes. I will never know what sleep is like. I shall never rest. So instead, I choose eternal sleep…

A/N Woop! It's finished! Gaara's all weirded out but OH WELL. P.S for those of you who, like me are extremely tired and feeling stupid – Gaara dies…XD LOVELY! actually I LOVE Gaara but this just seemed so…fitting…R & R Pleases!