Insert disclaimer here. AN: Another update! Sorry bout the lack of normal characters inthis, but this chapter is necessary for foreshadowing and transistion. Should still be an enjoyable read! Review, please.
Jack Grunky shook his head as Antonus handed him the files he'd dug up on Arnold Rimmer and Dave Lister. "I knew it, Antonus. I knew this would all get too complicated, when the Muggles started hopping about the galaxy."
Antonus nodded, but the Hogwarts graduate had the old Ravenclaw spark in his eyes. "Of course . . . terribly inconvenient . . .messy . . ."
Jack slammed his fist on the table. "Messy, indeed! As if the ministry could be expected to contact those off planet! I don't know what they use in the future. Owls? Owls with fancy little headgear to keep their feathery little heads from exploding in SPACE? Hamprowder never discloses these things to me, you know."
Galius Hamprowder was a representative for the Department for the Regulation of Time Travel. This Department was an odd sort of entity by nature. Anyone who joined could be called upon to travel forward or back for centuries, even millenia, representing the Ministry's interests across time. Members usually specialized in matters concerning the time of there birth and life, working as long as their physical bodies held up. Time travel did not lengthen one's life. In fact, if not careful, one could end up dying ten years sooner than expected. Of course, they wouldn't be ten years younger. Sketchy thing, time travel. Jack did not like "iffy" subjects like time, or disorganized behaviors. Which is why the case of Dave Lister drove him positively insane.
Further threatening his sanity was the lack of information he had to work with. Hamprowder was constantly apologetic, of course, but the end resault was the same. He could not disclose too much about the future, for reasons of "holding reality fast." So Jack always ended up stumbling about wherever the Department of Time Travel was concerned. He was half blind and deaf, and expected to make decisions and handle messes? Hamprowder was a wizard from their time, and so had been assigned to the case.
"Well," Hamprowder had explained, "I can't take them back to their own time, because they already exist there, you see. That's sloppy and risky. So they'll have to stay here. Can't have two Dave Listers or Arnold Rimmers at once. Stretches things about. And Merlin help us if they ever should meet . . . but of course we can't put them back where they left off untrained. Bad form. And, with all the time travel involved, we are far too hesitant to take away their magic. Sorry, Jack, but it looks like this is your responsibility." And with that, Hamprowder had dropped the limited and edited files on his desk, and fizzled out of existence for the next few centuries, or at least the next few weeks.
"Well," Antonus began hesitantly, "clearly Mr. Rimmer's case is not unheard of. But, your right, Mr. Lister is simply a study in poor organization, and secondhand effects of Muggle progress. Perhaps if we were less out of touch with their realm . . ."
Grunky slammed his desk again. "Let's NOT start that again, MacLaghlan. No, we have to do what we have to do. Since they are both British natives, I suppose Hogwarts is the proper place for them?" He frowned, flipping through the files. Here's a copy of Mr. Rimmer's acceptance letter. I see they haven't changed the design or format too much. I just don't understand how-or why-the other one ended up where he did. He's a-well, you looked at these. Yes, we'll arrange for them to be sent to Hogwarts."
"And the other two?" Antonus asked.
Jack Grunky rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "The other three, you mean. Musn't forget the portait. Hmm. Well, we'll arrange for the portrait to be hung at Hogwarts. Magically, of course, since there seems to be some issue with simply moving it. And . . ." He drummed the desk with his fingers. "And . . . let's arrange for the other two to be guests at Hogwarts. We'll get a subtle study of them in. You do it, Antonus! Yes! Go to Hogwarts as a liason, and keep track of things."
Antonus's eyes glazed over with pleasure. "A study? Oh, I'd be delighted. I'll learn so much from this . . ." he babbled enthusiatically, ecstatically.
"Get something in on Hamprowder for once, eh?" laughed Jack. Suddenly he looked far more pleased about the whole situation.
