a/n I am so annoyed! I was writing this, and then the computer froze and I didn't get to save. So I am really sorry if it isn't that good. I just can't put my heart and soul into it twice.
Well, I don't really understand the reviews for my last chapter. Are you people yelling at me or Jess? Either way your really yelling at me...but whatever. I hope you like this chapter!
Author: Queen of Weird
Disclaimer:I have millions of Milo pictures. I own a dog. I own books, I own my own personal stories. I even owna laptop, but I do NOT own anything on Gilmore Girls, and sadly, never will.
Summary: What if Rory hadn't let Jess just walk away in 4th season's episode: 'Nag Himmandi is Where They Found the Gnastic Gospel'? This is my version of what would happen
Chapter Five
"Thanks for letting me cry on your shirt, Marty. I heard tears don't come out easily..." It was one of my bad jokes, but I was upset. I stood in Marty's Common Room, wiping my cheeks so vigourously with a wet towel, my face was blotched with red.
"No. I think they just don't come out of faces." You know the saying figh fire with fire? Well that almost fits in the situation, except it would be: Fight lame jokes with lame jokes.
I attempted smiling, but it was hard for me to give him even a half smile. He returned it and cotinued watching me as I tried to get rid of the stains of tears on my now red cheeks. His arm was draped over the back of the couch, and his legs were pulled up Indian Style.
"Oh I give up!" I exclaimed, stomping into Marty's bathroom. Then I shrieked and came back into the Common Room. Good thing my face was already red, or you would have been able to tell I was blushing. "You should tell your roommates to close the bathroom door when they are using it!" I said, and threw the towel down onto the counter. I then walked to the door. "I'll see you around, right Marty?" I glanced at him.
"Yeah Sure. I'll see you...later." But I didn't catch the last word, I was already out the door. My hands were in my pockets, and I fingered the cool surface of my cellphone. People stared at me. Self-consiously, I would bring my hand up to my face each time I caught someone, and I would begin rubbing my cheeks.
My leather bookbag was heavy on my currently frail shoulders. I was still weak from my breakdown. I was upset with Jess, and I wa supset with myself. Mentally I had been slapping myself, ever since he ran away. Actually, ever since I began doing stupid things with him while I was with Dean.
I entered the classroom silently, and slipped between the chair and desk without a peep, and throughout the rest of the class, I did not make a sound, except for the scratching of my pen on paper. And for the rest of the day, it was like that.
----
At dinner, Marty, Paris, and I sat together at a table, though I could tell Paris would rather Marty not be there. Rory wouldn't mind if she was alone. She wasn't talking at all right now, even if she had been able to make lame jokes with Marty in his dorm, she lost that ability.
Paris cleared her throat. "So. Rory, I was thinking..." she began, putting her fork in her mouth. I stared expectantly at her. That blank look seemed to be back with me. "Aren't you going to ask what I was thinking?" she asked impatiently.
"I kinda thought you'd just continue, you know..." It was the most I had spoken in hours. Marty looked relieved that I finally said something, but Parisgave off the impression that she could care less. "Anyway. I was thinking...Maybe you could run an idea past Doyle for me? You know, for the Yale Daily News.?"
"I figured as much..." My voice was very soft and gentle. More so than usual. I emptied some food into my mouth, then continued staring at Paris, waiting to hear what I was to run past Doyle.
Annoyed, Paris rolled her eyes. She quickly swallowed her meat, then once again clearded her throat. "Maybe you could suggest positions to Doyle? You know president, vice president, secretary, etc?"
"Why don't you ask him yourself?" Marty asked, staring at his plate as he ate. Iflashed him a tiny smile, then looked at Paris, waiting for an answer to Marty's question.
"Oh, what was that noise? Ohwell, I gues sit was the wind...So what do you think? Will you?"
"Why can't you?" I asked for Marty. I smiled sweetly, a false smile at her and stared, unmoving. "Because! If I suggest it, Doyle will think I want the president job, and then he won't even consider giving it to me!"
"Well, then he probably won't consider giving me the president job either," I said quietly
"Oh what do you care! I came up with the idea! Anyway, he would consider you if you ask..."
"Why me and not you?"
"Because you are you. He likes you more than me..." I let out a small sigh. "Fine. I'll ask."
"YES!" Paris exclaimed. And then I went back to silence.
----
After dinner, I said goodnight to Marty, telling him I'd see him tomorrow, and I went back to my dorm, immediately going to my room and pulling out the books. I began my homework, trying to force my mind off of him.
After finishing two of the four things I had, the pressure of not thinking of him let in, and I began thinking. I stared at my notebook, and tears silently dripped onto the paper, smearing the ink. Not wanting to ruin my work further, I got up and collapsed on my bed, letting my hair surround my face.
My face was becoming wet, little by little, and my eyes sparkled, but only because tears were there. How could I tell him how I felt? He was seeing the Barbie Doll again! The skimpy clothe wearing, bubble-gum chewing, 'ice cubes are fascinating'. Barbie Doll.
I hated Shane with the deepest passion for stealign Jess from me again. But, I guess I can't really blame Jess. Actually...yes I could. He told me he loved me, and then he abandoned the idea of trying to get me, and he got Shane.
Shane was such an idiot. I'm surprised she passed highschool. I bit my lower lip, and tears ran past my eyelids. My eyelashes clumped together, making pointy little triangles. I began sobbing, and then hiccupping. It was rather uncomfortable.
I sat up and exited my room. Tanna and Janet looked over at me. "What's wrong?" Tanna asked in her breathy, airy, squeaky voice. I just waved it away, holding back my sobs. I hiccuped, and went into the kitchen area. I grabbed a glass and got water.
I drank up and went back to my room. Without thinking, I pulle dout my cell and dialed Luke'sapartment number. The phone rang teice before the familiar vocie answered.
"Hello?"
"Hey..."
"Oh...Um...Bob. What's up?"
"Bob."
"Oh. Interesting. You need me to meet you at that bar near Yale in about half an hour?"
"Um.Yes. Yes I do..." I decided to play along.
"Okay. See you around Bob..."
I hung up. That was very unusual behavior for Jess. I took a deep breath and walke dinto the bathroom, deciding to wash my face and put a little makeup on.
Once done, I looked in the mirror. Not too done up, but just enough so. I took a deep breath, and wlaked out of Yale.
a/n Okay, weird chapter, right? Lots of things about crying. But whatever. Please review about whatevr! I don't mind flames, I just need feedback on how to improve this fic! Anyway, I should have the next one out FAirly soon. Ta-ta!
