FOREWORD: Would I really parody death like so? Am I that cold?
Yeah, duh, I've been doing it.
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DISCLAIMER: same old same old --------------------
Vernon yawned, playing an acoustic guitar, dangling his legs off a rock near the GPC. It was about three in the morning, and Franke listened in to him secretly. She hid behind a rock, crouching down and looking up at him, silhouetted romantically by the moonlight.
"The untimely death of Brad..." Vernon yawned, strumming, picking, and any other methods of playing guitar I forgot.
Raz jumped up on another rock, also trying to secretly impress Lili... more, for some reason, with a bass. He began a thump-thum-thump rhythm with Vernon's song, as Bobby Zilch climbed onto a rock, hitting up a sweet drumroll and getting a jazzy beat going. From the ground, Lili pulled out a saxophone and Franke pulled out a trumpet.
"Kills like nothing ever could! Dark and jaded world I hated, everything I left behind, I don't need you and I don't want you, world that left me blind!" Vernon yelled, as the music went quieter and quieter. Bobby Zilch brought it down with the toms and sidesticks, as Lili made a mysterious air with the sax.
Vernon screamed the guitar into life again, chord after twanging chord. "PLASTIC BAGS OF NOVACAINE! SOME PCP TO KILL THE PAIN! YOU BUILD A TOMB TO STORE YOUR RUST, MOTH-EATEN PILES OF BLOWING DUST!"
Everyone stopped. "Whoa," Raz mentioned, "that was awesome."
"Yeah," Vernon said. "We can be a Five Iron Frenzy tribute band! We can go on tour and Reese will say, 'wow they do care' and he'll make the real Five Iron Frenzy again and sue our pants off!"
"YEAH!" Raz yelled, as suddenly their instruments exploded.
"Wait," Bobby noticed, "who was playing sax and trumpet?"
Everyone stared around as Lili and Franke fled, like Joe and Jeff playing splinter cell - horribly. They ducked behind a tiny signpost, as everyone stared at them. "I see you there," Raz said.
"Y DIDNT U GIVE ME ASSAULT" Franke yelled, hitting Lili in the back of the head.
"What are you kids doing up this late?" Sasha asked, holding a loaded glock and turning it sideways.
"Wait, first don't kill me, second, Sasha is a gangster?"
Sasha fired off one round, hittng Raz in the leg. Raz screeched, falling to the ground. Bobby Zilch pulled out an M4A1. "Don't move, scum."
Sasha put his hands up, as suddenly Bobby Zilch was stolen by flaming ninjas.
"Why..." Raz asked, from the floor, "is this so reminiscent of a hacked Halo PC game...?"
"YEAH-HOOOO" Quentin responded from a flying Warthog that shot rockets at lightspeed.
"Christ!" Sasha yelled. "The GPC! First a bus, now rockets?"
"GUYS TURN OFF FRIENDLY FIRE" Quentin yelled, forgetting his punctuation, while shooting at Sasha frantically.
Phoebe yawned from the gunner seat, as suddenly they ceased to exist in a flash and a horrible screech.
"WHAT WAS THAT?" Raz asked, now back in normal leg-condition.
"I launched the return to normality." Sasha responded. "Since you keep SCREWING WITH THE SYSTEM."
"Oh," Raz responded.
"Man, I feel so... OOC... I need a shower." Lili mumbled, walking away from the group.
