Well, first I just have to thank you all for your great comments - I'm really not sure I would have bothered writing this chapter if it hadn't been for all your great encouragement. I know this isn't probably exactly what you are all waiting for, but I thought I'd string it out a little longer (dramatic tension and all that)! So enjoy...
Within nad Without You
We were talking-about the space between us all
And the people-who hide themselves behind a wall of illusion
Never glimpse the truth-then it's far too late-when they pass away.
DEREK
There weren't many people to see him go – just Burk and Izzy. Derek shouldered his backpack and strode down the short transitory tunnel, which would take him onto the aeroplane. He didn't look back; this was the start of his new life. It was definitely time he moved on, but somehow, the thought of New York gave him the uncanny sensation of turning back.
Derek took his seat in the undersized domestic aircraft. A tall man he was more than a little crammed, and this flight was packed with no in-flight entertainment he was in for a long wait, and although he tried to avoid it, even now his thoughts strayed to Meredith.
"I wonder if she's still living in Manhattan?" He had told himself, and everyone else, that his move had nothing to do with the past. He was heading to New York because he liked the city. This was so blatantly not the case that he suspected his friends had merely been humouring him when they politely agreed. Still, Meredith had probably moved by now, she probably wasn't even in the state.
"I wonder if she'd want me to drop in on her?" The thought was so sly that it seemed to creep into his mind without his even having thought it, but once it was there, it only seemed polite. They were old friends; he should go and see her.
We were talking-about the love we all could share-when we find it
To try our best to hold it there-with our love
With our love-we could save the world-if they only knew.
MEREDITH
Meredith woke that morning, curled in Ella's bed, the little girl peacefully asleep by her side. With her return to consciousness came her return to pain and she looked cautiously down to examine the damage. Aside from the bruises, her wrist was swollen to twice its normal size. Like some giant secret trying to burst free from the skin and proclaim itself to the world.
She lay still a moment thinking of plausible excuses to the inevitable questions. Thankfully, working in a hospital made people less inclined to discuss maladies when they didn't have to, but it also made them weary. There was no way she'd convince anyone she had just fallen down the stairs.
Then there was the other problem – how to treat it. It was a little difficult to fix her own wrist, and not wanting to ask for Carlos' help, she decided to quietly go visit the casualty department of another hospital where she would not be so well-known.
We were talking-about the love we all could share-when we find it
To try our best to hold it there-with our love
With our love-we could save the world-if they only knew.
DEREK
"Where to?" The cab driver didn't even register Derek's face as he slid into the dark leather interior of the taxi.
"New York Presbyterian," With no family and no friends, Derek thought he may as well take a look at what would become his new home. He had left his belongings at the hotel and, feeling trapped amongst the sterile décor of hospitality, headed for the streets.
As they drove along the regular rectangular blocks, and the building's towered over them, Derek could almost see what Addi had liked about this place.
There was a certain pride that stemmed from the grandeur of human achievement. Then, across the road, by the park, he caught site of an old man pushing what were quite probably all he had in an old trolley. In fact the trolley was so old it had a broken wheel and the man was struggling to drive it straight. New York may be the epitome of human achievement, but really, it was as sordid as the rest of humanity.
The taxi pulled up at the intersection of two bustling streets. Derek strode purposefully into the reception.
"Hello, I'm Dr. Derek Shepherd, the neurology expert."
Try to realise it's all within yourself
No-one else can make you change
And to see you're really only very small,
And life flows on within you and without you.
MEREDITH
Meredith tugged down on her left sleeve. She knew she was being paranoid, but the secret knowledge of were her injury came from made her feel guilty. She sighed. It was no use stressing, she was headed for the opposite end of town. Surely this city was big enough to hide one woman whose life was falling apart.
As she turned into 168th, her destination came into view and, clenching her good hand into a fist, she walked into the casualty department.
She needn't have worried. The room was filled with people determinedly avoiding all eye contact. No one here would ask questions. Thankfully, Meredith slipped into a chair to wait her turn.
Half an hour later, a young man, obviously an intern approached her. He had mousy hair, and a hesitant manner that reminded her of George, all those years ago when they had started out together.
"Excuse me, I'm Dr. Simons, would you like to tell me what the trouble is?"
"I took my little girl roller blading for her birthday," Meredith smiled, as though sharing a maternal confidence, "And it turns out she's much better than me. I've fallen on my wrist and," She paused, on the verge of self diagnosis, "it's swollen".
Gently Dr. Simons took Meredith's wrist in his hands and had a brief look.
"Well, I suppose we'd better get an X-ray," He smiled at her encouragingly at her.
"Yes, he's definitely like George," Meredith thought as she followed him down the corridor. For a moment, she felt a pang of regret for those years she had spent in Seattle.
"So," Dr. Simons continued, "You had better tell me exactly how you fell," and Meredith launched into a detailed account of the imaginary birthday party.
We were talking-about the love that's gone so cold and the people,
Who gain the world and lose their soul-
They don't know-they can't see-are you one of them?
DEREK
"Dr. Shepherd," A middle aged man with a jovial grin bellowed across the reception to where Derek stood at the counter. "I've heard so much about your fine work in the West, and now I get to see the man myself. It's great to meet you."
As it turned out, this man was Dr. James Rafton, chief surgeon at NYP. He was delighted Derek had turned up. They hadn't really been expecting him until tomorrow, but it was good luck he was early. As it happened, the enthusiastic Rafton explained, the woman Shepherd was replacing had a batch of interns under her care.
"I know it's a little irregular to carry interns this far up the surgical ladder," He grinned apologetically at Derek, "but we've got so many and you'll only have the three: Blake, Simons and Patterson. All great kids, I'm sure you'll get on just fine."
Grabbing a passing nurse, the chief inquired where these three particular interns might be. The young woman shrugged non-committally and said she thought Dr. Simons had gone to the X-ray rooms with a patient.
"This way," Rafton called, leading Derek through the ever increasing maze of new corridors, "You'll know your way in a week," He called over his shoulder, reading the new attending's dazed countenance.
When you've seen beyond yourself-then you may find, peace of mind,
Is waiting there-
And the time will come when you see
we're all one, and life flows on within you and without you.
