Busted

He finally fell into an uneasy sleep disturbed by strange dreams. He didn't know what time he drifted off or what time he woke up. He stared at his ceiling some more before getting up and still beat most of the school to breakfast. The only one he could remember the next morning occupied his thoughts most of the day. No matter how hard he tried to forget it he couldn't get it out of his head.

He had dreamt that the world was falling apart. He dreamt that all the buildings were falling down and the mountains were leveling. Everything was just disintegrating right before his eyes. That wasn't the weird part, though. The weird part was the fact that he had sat on his back porch and just watched. It was as though he didn't care. He just didn't care that everything was ending. He figured that was probably true.

However, the part that had him thinking all day was the fact that Ginny had been with him. They hadn't talked at all, they had just watched the world fall apart. They sat there in silence and watched everything disappear. She hadn't held his hand. He hadn't held her. They weren't touching and they didn't even look at each other. It almost felt as though they were there for completely different reasons. He couldn't tell whether they were watching his world fall apart or hers. Were their worlds really the same after all?

He didn't know what it meant. He couldn't help but wonder, though. His world was definitely falling apart around him. Was she the only one who would be there for him? Was she the only one who was there for him? Was he supposed to there for her? Did she need someone? More importantly, did she want someone? Didn't she have Potter?

He went through the day on auto-pilot. The most annoying part of the day was that he kept seeing her. He couldn't get away from her. He wanted to get away from her. He wanted her to stop crowding him.

He didn't really know what was happening. She kept making eye contact with him. Or did he keep making eye contact with her? He wanted to scream at her that she didn't understand him and that she stop trying to.

When he heard that she had broken up with Potter, he couldn't help but smile. As he watched her after that, he realized how lonely she really was and he actually felt guilty for the smile. They were too cool to be lonely, people like them shouldn't be lonely. But they both were.

By the end of the day he had decided that one life just wasn't enough for him. He didn't do alone. He needed another soul to sustain him. He hated feeling that way. He hated being weak and that was how he saw it.

He felt like he was wearing his heart on his sleeve and that the whole world could see it. He knew she was the only one who did. He hated how the people they had become weren't the people they really were. He wanted her to know him, to really know him. He wanted to be someone other than who he was. He wanted her to own him.