Bright Lights

Draco watched her disappear before beginning to walk again. He didn't agree with her at all. He was sure they could learn to be themselves together. He was sure they could help each other be honest. He was sure he could learn to deal with things with her by his side.

So why hadn't he said so? Why hadn't he spoken and tried to convince her?

Was that what that last look of pain on her face had been? Had she been hoping that he would do just that? Well, there are some things you can't see until it's too late, some things you can't change.

He turned to face the direction she had gone. She was returning to her life, to the world of bright lights and big eyes and loud voices. He hoped that if the bright lights didn't receive her she would turn around and come home.

When had he started thinking of himself as her home? Maybe a few minutes after he had started thinking of her as his.

He continued his walk. Who was going to save him when her love was gone? Who was going to save him if she wasn't there? How was he going to face all the things in the world that he was up against? He wondered if she would find something that was enough to keep her or if she would keep wandering, like he was apparently destined to do?

If only he had seen the truth in what she was saying earlier, but there were some things you never saw until it was too late.

Well, he certainly had a hole in him now that he wouldn't be able to fill. He now had a nice scar he'd be able to talk about. But who would he talk about it to?

He wondered if it would ever be the same. He wondered if they would be able to watch each other as they had before they had spoken, support each other from a distance. He was sure they would watch each other, but he was also sure it would never be the same. He knew it would hurt every time he caught her eye. He knew she would hurt every time she caught his.

He hoped the bright lights would take her in. He hoped her friends would be her friends and accept her for who she really was. He hoped she found what she needed.

At the same time, he hoped they would refuse her. He hoped they would never understand her. He hoped she would let it all tear her down. He hoped she would need him enough to come home.

He turned around and faced the castle. By now she was inside. By now she was on her way to her tower. By now she was back in her life. He screamed after her, "FOR MERLIN'S SAKE TURN AROUND!"

He fell to his knees. His eyes stung so bad. He wanted tears to come just to sooth the stinging. He screamed at the top of his lungs as he had heard her scream earlier that evening.