"So how do you deal with it?" the woman psychiatrist asked Stablor.
"Deal with what?" Stabler grunted.
"Working in SVU. I know it's not the easiest job in police work".
"What do you know… Look, I go home, hug my kids and kiss my wife" he said sitting as calm as he could.
"And that takes care of it?" she asked.
"Mostly." He answered back.
"What else do you do?" she asked.
"I, um, think a lot. And she helps me" he said looking away.
"Your wife?" the woman asked.
"I don't want to talk about it" he told her as he stood up and turned away.
"Who's 'she'?" the woman asked. Stablor took in a deep breath and turned back around.
"When I'm hurting- I feel better when I think of her, then I feel guilty because I thought about her" he said.
"Why shouldn't you think of her?" the woman asked as Stablor covered his face with his hand, still standing.
"I'm married- I have four kids" he pleaded and her eye brows lifted.
"So, there's another woman?"
"No!" he shouted as he turned back around.
"Who is she?" the woman asked. Stablor turned back to face her again after a second. He looked at her and tried to form words but couldn't.
"Is it your partner?" the woman asked. Stablor closed his eyes as he stood still.
"When I close my eyes I see her- so I keep my eyes open" he said opening them as he started to come and sit back in the chair.
"When I go to sleep, I dream about her- so I don't sleep" he continued.
"…when I work with her I feel comfortable. I feel safe. I feel right. I would risk my life for her any day- I would be there any time she needed me." He pleaded as he quieted down.
"And that's why I hate myself" he said standing as he grabbed his head tightly.
"Have you ever told her any of this?" the woman asked.
"Of course not" he said.
"I wouldn't risk what we have now for this" he told her, she nodded.
"Have you two ever kissed or had sex?" the woman asked.
"No, no, no." he told her honestly.
"Do you want to?" she asked.
"What?" he asked confused as he stood up again.
"Do you want to kiss her? Or sleep with her?" she asked. He frowned and started breathing heavily. Then he calmed down and got a hold of himself. He turned back around and faced the woman. She awaited his answer but he didn't know what to say. He couldn't lie, not about this, and he couldn't tell the truth- he might be transferred. He looked away and headed toward the door. The woman nodded to herself and turned to see him run into his partner right out side the window. She watched as they talked.
"Everything ok?" Benson asked as they stood close. He looked into her eyes- he could tell she actually cared. He tilted his head as he looked at her, and the psychiatrist watched carefully.
"Elliot?" Benson asked as he brought his hand up to her face. He gently and lightly brushed a strand of hair that lay on her forehead to the side. She watched him carefully- she had lost her breath. His touch was gentle and caring and… He slowly started to lean in when he stopped and looked into the room to see the psychiatrist watching. He looked back in Benson's eyes and then pulled away. He walked around her and walked off, as she turned around to watch him leave. She put her hand up to her face, where he had held her. Then she turned and looked in the room at the psychiatrist, before she took her hand away and walked off in the other direction.
