Thanks for the reviews from wiseguy, LuvAngel448, Katieelessar, Frek, Street Spirit, awesomepossum, dov, and The Lady Luthien!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jack hated her. No, that wasn't right, he knew. Nevertheless, it was the only way in which he could describe the rage that boiled up inside him when Lureen gave him that cold little smile and just turned back to her work like he didn't exist. He had just asked her about their son, goddamnit, why didn't she care? What he did in his spare time was irrelevant to her, he knew, but wasn't their son worth giving a solitary moment to?

He exited the house through the front door, still simmering. The door closed behind him with a soft, dull thud. That didn't seem fitting to him at the moment. He went back, opened the solid wooden door, and slammed it closed, hard. No reaction from inside.

A long time ago, someone had told him that anger was a reaction to stress. You felt rage when you had so much feeling simmering inside you that it had no choice but to bubble up and create an explosion. He knew that ever since reuniting with Ennis del Mar, countless emotions were buzzing in his head: anxiety, passion, anger… And love, he admitted to himself.

He kicked the ground angrily. He knew somewhere in the back of his mind what was going on here, but logic didn't help much when he was this upset. He just knew that slamming that door with all his strength had felt damn good. So he did it again.

He allowed himself to think about the fact that a large part of this anger was a result of the events that had transpired after Ennis's divorce. The complete and utter joy that he had felt upon first hearing the news had worsened the resultant misery tenfold. Humiliation, anger, and despair had flooded his brain and it was all he could do not to either start crying right then and there or punch Ennis in the gut.

Of course had gone to Mexico after that. What else was he supposed to have done, go confide in Lureen? The idea of this scenario would evoke a laugh if he were even remotely in the mood for laughing. Instead, he gave the door another slam.

So why was he going to go meet Ennis again? Why was he putting himself through all this agony?

He sighed. These questions had been running through his head for years, now. Every time, heading up for one of his "fishing trips", he questioned it. But every time, the twisted agony that he felt when contemplating Ennis alone became almost pleasurable when around him. Jack could feel anger, worry, sadness, regret, and still smile because his man was right there, holding him. He didn't understand it, and doubted he ever would.

He slammed the door hard again. Why were things like this? Why didn't he have a relationship like that with his wife, whom he had pledged to love for his entire life? What would his boyhood self think if he knew that every step along the way had been leading up to this path? Should he have taken a different turn, somewhere along the line? Should he have refused to see Ennis again, let the four year separation increase until the pain was numb or he was in his grave?

He knew that these were questions without answers, so he tried to let them go. But when question lurked still in his mind, one that he could answer, in fact, had to answer right now. Should he stop right now, unpack his things, and accept the life that he seemed fated to live? Should he forget the starry nights, the quiet conversation, the feel of Ennis's hands on his body?

The answer, he knew for a fact, was yes. He should. He should never see Ennis again and never go on another fishing trip.

And yet, he could never not go, when the thought of seeing Ennis was in his mind. Even if it was an unsatisfactory situation, Ennis wanted it to stay this way, and Jack wanted to be with Ennis, no matter what. And, as Ennis always said, if you can't fix something, you got to stand it.

Jack gave the door a final slam for good measure. By the time that Lureen got to the door and opened it to see what the hell was going on, her husband's truck was already making its way down the long road, leaving a cloud of dust in its wake.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Please keep reviewing!