Roxas slowed his pace down, guilt and anger playing tug a war in his mind. Glancing behind him, he noticed the redhead was still hot on his tail, "I never asked you to follow me, go home..."
"I know you didn't," Axel wanted to say more, but he knew none of his questions or comments would be entertained. His legs were definitely getting a work out, but it seemed the blond was finally slowing down his speed.
After a few more blocks in silence, both teen's heads turned to find a familiar boy calling after them,
"Roxas!" the brunet was hunched over, gasping between words. "I've been looking everywhere for you."
"What Sora?"
All four of them ignored the harsh tone, but Riku was the first to break the tension. "You seem troubled."
Before Roxas could snap a remark, his brother took over, taking a few steps past him and encouraging Roxas to follow. Axel and Riku stayed back, barely in ear shot, when they began conversing, Sora began as well. "What's wrong?" he cut off his brother, "Don't tell me nothing, we were a couple blocks away from you and I could see, from that far, that something is clearly wrong... are you unhappy here...?"
"No," Roxas let out a slow, deep, breath, "That's not it..."
"I know it's not much, but I'm trying to help-"
"Sora," he cut off his brother, "You've done more than enough, it's nothing to do with you, I'm just... I'm just..." Roxas didn't know what to say. He was tired, he was mad, he felt hopeless, he felt betrayed, but how could he explain that without using any of those words?
"I'm sorry," Sora wrapped Roxas in a hug. It wasn't asked for, or expected, but it wasn't completely rejected. It lasted a few seconds before the brunet pulled away, keeps his hands on Roxas' forearms. "I want to help."
"There's..." Blue eyes searched blue eyes, "There's nothing you can do..."
"There's always something that can be done," a determined look slowly crossed his face. His hands retracted to clasp together in front of himself, he looked back at the other two teens.
Riku and Axel were still deep in conversation, Riku being a little more honest than Sora had been, "We were in the bedroom, Cloud and Zack," he said the last name like a question, "Started yelling at each other, and then Tifa told us to go for a walk, they were yelling about-"
"Let's show Roxas around!" Sora yelled as he slowly approached, a toothy grin on his face.
"I've walked all around," the blond started, but his brother turned and cut him off, smile still in tact.
"But you haven't seen all the best spots yet, let's go to the mall."
The mall was nowhere near as exciting at Sora made it seem, he tried to over play every little thing- like the view, the food, the stores- but after the 2nd greasy snack his brother made him try, Roxas wanted to get out of there.
"Sora, thanks, but can we go somewhere not as... loud?"
"Let's go to my place," Axel threw out, everyone's eyes stayed on Roxas though, waiting for his answer.
"Alright, let's go." The blond's answer was a lot quicker than anyone expected, and he brushed it off as though it was a simple suggestion.
"I've never been to Axel's house before..." Sora whispered to Riku, following behind Axel and his brother.
"It's not scary," Riku comforted the brunet, "It'll give Roxas his quiet..."
The walk was the quiet that Roxas had been searching for, but the long they walked, the more he began to get the feeling that it was a big step that Axel was inviting him to his house. Although, he couldn't think of a reason for it to be.
As they walked in, Roxas was hit in the face with cigarette smoke, "Hold you breath," the redhead mumbled. They followed Axel through the dark cluttered house, the air thick with smoke, until they finally entered his room. His windows allowed light in, reminding them of the sunlight that was still outside. His room was refreshing to say the least, the air light and clean.
"House all to yourself?" Roxas broke the silence.
"Huh? No, my mom's in her room, downstairs."
"The basement?" The blond thought it strange for the parent to sleep in the basement while the 'angsty' teen slept on the main floor. A nod was the only reply he received before the teen changed the subject.
"Nice and quiet," Axel held up his arms, gesturing to his room. Sora clung to Riku's side, as if off put about something, while Riku sat in his usual position, leaning back with his arms crossed.
"It's just as quiet as my house," Riku defended.
"Yeah, but we always go to your house," Axel chided, "We need a change in scenery."
Daylight slowly faded, the four of them talking about every insignificant thing they could think of. Roxas wouldn't admit it, but he definitely appreciated the distraction. But as the light disappeared, Roxas became anxious again.
"Alright, we'll see you later," the silver haired teen waved, the smallest teen in tow. Roxas shifted his weight back and forth, it wasn't too cold, but he'd gotten used to sleeping in a nice warm bed.
As the teen started to mumble an awkward farewell to the redhead, he was cut off. "What, you're not staying? I thought you'd hang out here with me, just because they left doesn't mean you have too..." Roxas wondered if Axel was begging him to stay for his own sake or for Roxas' sanity.
"Yeah, sure, if you want to keep my terrible company, so be it." With a shrug, Roxas followed Axel back into the house. It surprised him that he still hadn't heard a peep from Axel's mother, "You sure she's even here?"
Axel stopped in his tracks, quiet in thought, "Like I said, she keeps to herself."
"That's gotta feel lonely, if she's like this all the time..." Roxas returned to his seat, a bean bag chair close to the floor.
Axel seemed saddened at first, but it was his turn to shrug it off. "It's got it's perks," he pulled out a large bottle of clear liquid. Handing it over to Roxas with a blank face, the redhead had no idea how the blond would react to being offered liquor, especially now that they were alone. His face turned to surprise when Roxas twisted off the top, cracking the seal, and took a large swig.
Roxas gulped down as much as he could before his lungs begged him to exhale. As he lowered the bottle the hot feelings took over, his lips burned from where the bottle had been, his mouth a strong taste that almost made him want to dry heave, and his throat felt like he had swallowed fire. The pit of that fire sat beside his heart in his chest, his eyes watered before he finally choked out a sentence, "Did you want to get cups?"
"No newbie to liquor are you Rox," Axel smirked, "If you want to drink it straight, go for it." He cracked open a beer the blond never saw him pull out, he held it up from across the room, "Cheers."
Roxas copied the gesture, adding a nod, before he mentally prepared himself for his next chug. He was used to drinking, not that he'd tell Axel, but the first couple sips were always hard to swallow.
"Your mom doesn't mind you drinking?" Of course the redhead had to break the silence. Axel watched as the blond chugged and nodded before giving him an answer, he could tell Roxas was having a hard time swallowing but he also seemed to be enjoying the burn.
"Could ask you the same thing," it wasn't an answer at all, but Axel played his game. Maybe he'd eventually get a straight answer.
"She keeps to herself," he repeated, "I'm not out getting arrested every night so she doesn't see a problem..." Now it was his turn to nod. "I'm not getting in trouble, I'm not getting her in trouble, so as long as it stays that way, she doesn't mind buying it for me."
"Wow, sounds depressing," Roxas mumbled, another hard swallow. "Sitting in your room all day, drinking by your lonesome."
With a chuckle he relaxed, "Yeah, that's why I'm always hanging out with Riku."
"He's not a bad person..." Roxas said it more to himself than Axel.
"Yeah. He's no drama, and he's annoyingly rational... he's a good egg for your brother to end up with."
Roxas seemed surprised when Axel added his two sense about Riku, but again, the only response he gave was a nod. The blond turned the bottle over in his hand, admiring the label plastered on the front, he was so lost in the bottle he was noticing how Axel wasn't drinking his beer.
Heat was slowly oozing through his body, the liquor slowly spreading, it hadn't reached his head though. That was what he really wanted. With a deep inhale, he pressed the bottle to his lips and chugged, plugging his nose to help keep his concentration. It wasn't till his lungs screamed for air that he put the bottle down. Gasping for air as the liquor spread to his brains. The liquid hit without hesitation, Roxas was reveling in it as he stared at the blank wall in front of him, not noticing Axel's concerned stare.
A small sip of his drink, Axel tested the waters, "Your mom doesn't care about you drinking?"
Without breaking his stare from the wall he answered, "No... she understands... it's a give and take..."
Axel stayed off his drink, the way the blond was acting put the redhead on edge. There was a switch in Roxas that Axel didn't want to flip, unsure of the outcome. "Give and take?"
This time it took the blond a few drinks to answer. Never breaking eye contact with the wall, as if it was his lifeline. "She doesn't mind me getting drunk, as long as I stay quiet about her 'accidents'." Even though he knew Roxas wasn't watching, he gave a quizzical stare, his mouth wanting to push and prod more, but he was beaten to it. "She makes black eyes look so... graceful..."
It only raised more question, the tension in the room rising with it. Axel wanted to start demanding answers from the blond, clean simple answers so he could effectively help the teen, but he knew they were in dangerous territory. He tried to ease the conversation to a safe zone. "What do you like to do... did you like to do, before you came here?"
Roxas paused. Staring at the wall, clearly in thought, but making no attempt to answer. He was so deep in his mind he didn't notice the time ticking by.
The redhead was beginning to think he'd crossed a line, would the boy snap and be angry or shut down. The latter was seeming more and more already in effect, with a fake chuckle he began to change the subject, but he let his voice fade out.
With a blank stare the younger spoke, "I like spending time with my mom... talking... joking..."
If Axel hadn't been intensely watching, he wouldn't have noticed the tears pouring down his face. He sat forward as Roxas took another large swig, already drunk, the tears kept pouring like a waterfall but his face and voices remained relaxed.
"I like her..."
In an attempt to lighten the cloud, Axel smirked, "You don't like sports, music, art? Anything else? Your dark little soul has to like something...?"
He slowly shook his head, "I don't know..." his face finally tensed, scowling at the wall, "I know what I don't like." Before the sober one could 'lighten' the mood again, the blond continued. "She has the corniest jokes," he spoke around his chuckling. "They're so bad they're good."
Axel was on edge even while Roxas was laughing.
"She makes the best food, she tries to teach me but it's not the same when I do it. And flowers," he shook his head with another chuckle, "They're so pretty, she loves taking care of things." His smirk dropped, "Except herself"
Another couple of gulps, "What do you nean?" Red flags were up, but Axel had a growing suspicion and this was the time for answers.
"You heard Zack," he spit out with malice, "she tried to kill herself. Zack and Angeal could never get her close enough, so she had to do it herself." He eyed the almost empty liquor bottle, "This is nice and all, but it's not the same..." Finishing the bottle, he spit out his next words. "I'd take a million bruises and broken bones to see her smile."
Axel wanted to ask, knowing sober Roxas wouldn't answer, but before the words formed, Roxas punched his thigh repeatedly. As he moved to stop the action, the blond stopped on his own. "They'll be gone when she wakes up."
An hour of silence drifted by, Roxas beyond drunk and Axel completely sober. Said blond didn't even notice the texting Axel was doing, Axel would have easily changed the subject had he asked.
Looking at Riku's new message let Axel know they were on the sandw page but it was to soon to confront the blond. By the time he had looked back up, Roxas had slouched down and was easily asleep.
Outside Axel stood on the I'll lit sidewalk, one hand holding the phone to his ear, the other pouring out his beer. "Riku, what else did you hear earlier?"
"Cloud... was not happy to see him."
"Did they say anything?"
"Cloud blames Zack, we weren't trying to eavesdrop."
"Should hear how he was talking," Riku cut him off.
"Until he's ready to talk like that sober, there isn't much to help with Ax. Tell your bleeding heart to take a seat and give the guy some space."
"I don't-,"
"You always do. You find something 'broken' and you feel the need to fix it, even when it destroys you and leaves you for dead. If I was wrong you wouldn't still be living with your mother."
Axel was done talking to Riku, looking at the stars for answers. There was no answer, but he had left an intoxicated minor in his room alone, even if he had been asleep it wasn't smart to leave him by himself.
Morning hit the blond hard, but not as hard as the liquor had. Axel ushered him on the bus and to his class, but try as he might, it was beyond obvious the blond was still drunk.
"Is he drunk?" Sora asked, watching his brother sit in the cafeteria. Axel and Riku silently watched, one's arms crossed in a disapproving manner while the other ran his fingers through his hair and nervously rubbed the back of his neck.
No one else seemed to notice, Roxas had stayed quiet and to himself, but his movements were lethargic and wobbly. With a deep breath Sora walked away, handing responsibility for his brother off to Riku, he couldn't risk his brother snapping and making a wrong move. There was a lot he was hiding, and if Seifer made an appearance again there was no telling how he'd react.
In no time, a familiar older blond was in the office. Roxas didn't enter the room, when his teacher told him Cloud was there to pick him up, he knew someone was selling him out, the way he stormed out of the school almost made it seem like he was angry but he was truthfully relieved. Until Cloud joined him in the car, although the man stayed silent, Roxas knew he wanted to scold the minor. The ride was quiet, till they pulled into the driveway of the house they all called home.
"Roxas..." Cloud spoke before he parked the car, "I..."
Roxas wanted to sleep, he wanted to snap at the man to leave him alone, to save the lecture, but he didn't have enough energy to be mad.
"I'm here for you..." not what he was expecting to hear. The older blond wanted to add that he knew there was more going on, that he knew Roxas needed help, he knew things weren't alright with him, but that was setting up a fight. A fight because what did he really know about a child he hadn't seen in so many years... "I'm here if you want to talk... but... I won't supply alcohol."
The blond didn't rush to get out of the car, not enjoying or hating the time. If Cloud expected him to start pouring his heart out, he was wrong. There was no more reason to stay in the car. They sat in silence like they were part of some happy family, but they weren't happy and they weren't a family. They were strangers with some DNA and nothing more. Instead he crashed on his bed, that wasn't his bed, and stared at his replacement's bed. Soon facing the wall when his emotions began to grow too much.
"Wake up already..."
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Long time no chapter...
Surviving this pandemic okay?
Uploaded: May 1st, 2020
