Apologies for the delay. I hope you all had a great weekend.


lll

One year later

I stand and marvel at the mansion in front of me. One of the graduating brothers from the Alpha Delta Phi fraternity is hosting a graduation party in Medina, Bellevue. It's a sprawled out establishment on the northernmost tip of the suburb. Being friends with Kate provides me a free ticket into these germfests. However, I only go to the ones I know Michael will be attending. My first semester at UDub was a little challenging when it came to being able to stalk him. I knew I had to be patient but this timeline was getting to be exhausting. I couldn't lose focus. I was going to get something on him and I was going to ruin his life, just like he ruined José'.

"Come on, Steele, let's go dance our asses off." Kate drags me up with her.

"I don't know how you walk in these heels," I groan, trying to keep up with her. I'm in the cut-off-your-air supply-kinda tight jeans and a black sequined top that's backless, with my hair open and dark kohl around my eyes and vampy lips. All thanks to Kate and her unwavering dedication to having everyone dressed to the nines . I let her dabble in her makeover exercises knowing I had to step up my game this semester and fully commit to the bit if I really wanted revenge. And if I can look pretty while doing it, well, that's a bonus in my book.

The house is filled to the brim with people. Loud music thumps through the hallways and the walls and bodies seem to vibrate with the humming of the bass. Some are drunk already, others are smoking up, and some have jumped into the pool. The walls are uplit in green and purple. Eyes sparkle and glaze over those they do not recognize. The rooms I walk through have crisp lines and shiny surfaces. Rich people just live and breathe differently. There's never a cozy nook in these kinds of homes. Just white walls and metallic surfaces. Sterile like their personalities. These parties are the only way they invite any sort of warmth but even then, it's all fleeting.

I break away from Kate and tell her I'm going to walk around. She winks at me and wishes me a good time.

Sorry, hon. I'm not here to find a boy to get busy with. I'm here to find one getting busy with another.

For a moment, I watch Kate get absorbed into the sea of people in the middle of the sunken living area and sway to the music. I watch in fascination and adoration. She's one of the sharpest minds I've met here yet she prefers to be underestimated by her peers. Be the one who controls the illusion and then when it's time to strike, break the spell and take what you want, she says.

I chuckle to myself and my brain fades into the memory of how we met.

It's been a few weeks since college started. I first had to attend those really random mandatory freshman peer orientation events that happen a week before school starts. It was easy being hidden among other students so I remained fairly unnoticed. There were a few times when I came close to bumping into Michael but thankfully didn't.

The self-absorbed asshole barely notices anything besides himself, so I don't really know what I was worried about.

I see them all flock to him, the girls, pushing up their breasts and twirling their hair, trying to get his attention and the guys, trying to bro up. I'm surprised that Ashley didn't follow him out here, crawling on her knees. She seemed so smitten with the high that being with him brought. According to her social media she ditched the pacific north-west for some California sunshine. I think it's the smartest choice she's made in her life.

There are few more from the senior class at Montesano High who are attending UDub as well, while I've not yet been recognized, I'm pretty sure that through the core classes, I'm bound to run into one of them.

I don't live on campus, it wasn't exactly budget friendly so I had to get crafty. I put a down payment on a very modest starter car. It's a little tin box but it's brand new and gets me to and from the Seattle campus. It's about a half an hour drive, so not all that bad. I've also condensed my schedule so that I only go to school three times a week and can maintain my part-time jobs. On days when I'm on campus, I bide my time by sitting in the library that's something out of the world of Harry Potter. José would've loved it and then subsequently yelled at me for living in a hoodie and jeans. But that's the beauty of college, no one cares what you're wearing as long as you're not stinking up the joint.

"You've got a killer body, Annie. For fuck's sake, act like it."

"It's too much work," I whine. "You can be hot and sexy for the both of us. I'll be your wingwoman forever."

"The moment we land in New York, we're going to become whores. Fuck the dry spell life."

"You've never gotten wet to experience a dry spell in the first place." I snicker.

He pushes me off the bed with evil joy,"choke on a dildo, you bitch!"

I smile to myself and continue to read over my assignment. I keep getting distracted by the beauty of this space and find myself daydreaming. Truth is, I should've been in New York with José, while we walked through Central Park and sipped on frappuccinos like some desperate, wannabe small town kids, begging for New York to accept us. Now, I don't know if I'll ever visit and if I do, will I even like it without him?

Sighing, I start at the top of the page for the fourth or fifth time– I can't remember– and try my best to concentrate on the virtues of free will and determinism.

"Ana, right?" I hear a feminine voice address me. My eyes slowly travel up to the source and before me stands a very well dressed girl who has sharp and curious green eyes with layers of strawberry blonde hair framing her face. She oozes confidence from every atom of her being.

José would like her or more like, worship at her feet basking in the shade and reflection of designer labels.

"Who wants to know?" God, I sound like an asshole but I'm not really here to make friends.

"I like you." She grins. "I'm Kate, you're in my creative writing class with Professor Roff and Philosophy 101 with Professor Vavetsi"

"Probably," I shrug, "I don't really pay attention to people around me." Now let me get back to my reading.

"Have you given any thought to who you're going to team up with for the final project for Vavetsi's class?"

"I prefer to work alone,"

"Want to team up?"

I close my eyes and clench my jaw. "Look, blondie… I don't want to team up. I'm sure you'll find someone else far more…" I search for the word, "gullible to help you get the A you so desperately want." I say my piece and get back to my reading.

"Listen up, you bitter brownie. I was trying to be nice because I think you're fucking smart and I enjoy hearing your point of view in class and I think we could write a kickass paper together. You think I can't fucking do this paper on my own? I fucking vomit 10,000 words papers like I take a shit in the morning. I honestly wanted a chance to get to know you because you seem like a real person unlike some of the dipshits I've been forced to hangout with so far."

My eyes meet hers again and I'm surprised by the change in tenor of her voice, her body language and most of all, her energy.

"But if you want to remain a fucking loner who has no friends, then be my fucking guest." She growls and stands up.

"Wait!" I stop her and she turns around. "I'm sorry. I assumed you're just like any rich and entitled kid that goes here and loves to hear themselves speak." My confession is just as harsh as my words from before but I keep my tone sincere.

"Oh, I'm all those things but the only difference is, I know what the fuck I'm talking about and I'm actually a decent person." She smirks. "Now let's try again. I'm Katherine Kavanagh but you can call me Kate." She holds out her hand.

I smile and take it. Hell, even her skin is nice. Probably uses some La Mer shit. Jose would be so proud that I actually listed a fancy skin product.

"I'm Anastasia Steele but I go by Ana."

The music slowly gets louder and sharper in my ears as the memory subsides. Turning away from the crowd of dancing people, I head into the kitchen to find something to eat. All I find are semi-stale chips and leftover salsa that looks questionable. Opening the fridge I find nothing but green smoothies and leaves. Who the fuck lives here? Rabbits? Fuck this shit. I see a few pizza boxes and thankfully the bottom one has a whole pizza up for grabs. I scarf down one piece. I've had better pizza in my life.

When I'm done with my gourmet meal, I resume my exploration. I pause in front of one the abstract paintings in a hallway when I'm approached by a guy.

"Drink?" He asks, passing the red cup to me. I decline. "What's your name? I've never seen you around."

He's cute, I won't lie. Tall, muscular, dirty blonde hair with brown eyes but I'm not here to hook up with him or anyone. In fact, I'm never attending these things to hook up. I probably should and release some tension. I wish my body wanted sex. It just wants to break something instead.

"Ashley," I reply. "I'm visiting from L.A."

"Want to get out of here?" Straight to the point. I like it. Direct. Why waste time if you're just going to fuck and duck?

"No, thanks." I smile, "however, if you walk back down where you came from, I'm sure you'll find someone willing to get out of here with you."

He walks closer, leaning into me and giving me a slow and deliberate once over. "Come on, Ash. We could have some fun."

"No means no, blondie. Now leave me the fuck alone." I tell him. His jaw tenses and he curses me out before leaving me alone.

I get to the end of the corridor an pass by a mirror before I reach the floor to ceiling height windows that look out into the backyard where the pool and another mass of bodies is celebrating in various forms.

I look at my reflection, really taking it in. It's me but I don't look like myself. Objectively, I know it's me… but it's not the me I once knew. This glammed up girl, with her hair done and sharply defined eyes is just a hollow shell of who she used to be and the potential she knew she had. She's too focused on a goal that's left room for anything else outside of school and work. I live on scraps of social media postings to fuel my resolve. And once I get what I want and burn everything in the life of the prey I stalk, then I'll find peace and move on.

Turning away from my unfamiliar reflection, I gaze on the crowd and spot the object of my revenge fantasies. He's drinking. Good. Laughing his ass off, high fives and secret handshakes galore. I watch him for a while, as he moves from crowd to crowd when I notice him glance up and his features soften. Interesting. He hurriedly breaks away from the crowd no doubt assuring them he'll be back by holding up his cup to illustrate that he's going for a refill.

I rush through the sea of people in the corridor. One guy, stops me by wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me closer. He reeks of alcohol and I shove him back to the wall.

"Don't fucking touch me." I growl and he laughs, holding his hands up.

"Are you this feisty in bed?"

"Call your dad for confirmation." I mutter and walk away from the people howling in shock and laughter at my audacity.

I feel myself slowly unraveling but this is as close as I've gotten to something. I can feel it.

Waiting by the grand staircase, I bow my head and catch quick glances of Michael walking through the crowd of people towards my direction, eyeing the stairs with determination. I start heading up the stairs myself and he takes them two at a time, from behind me, till he's in front of me. I quicken my pace and reach the landing just in time to see a sliver of his jacket as it disappears from view of a closing door. The upstairs is fairly empty in comparison to the shitfest downstairs.

When I get to the desired door, I slowly jiggle the handle and it's locked, of course it is. I walk to the next door down the hall and there's a couple getting busy under the covers but they don't notice me and I ignore them. When I look in the direction of the room where Michael is, I'm please to notice there's a shared bathroom between the rooms. JACKFUCKINGPOT!

I slip into the marble oasis that is distracting and beautiful. Locking the door on my end, I turn off the lights and slowly walk to the door that leads to the room where he is. Taking out my phone and setting it to record, I place my hand on the door handle and take a deep breath.

It unlocked.

It's now or never.

Slowly opening it, I'm thankful it doesn't creek or make a sound.

And then I hold my phone up.

Lo and behold. It's Michael sitting on the edge of the bed getting sucked off by some unknown guy.

Michael moans and encourages his partner to keep going. All I care for is that Michael's voice and face is recognizable. The room is fairly well lit so there's no mistaking that it's him.

When I've get to the minute mark of my recording, I stop. I have enough. Quickly, attaching it to an email, I upload it to my google drive, send it to myself and José's email for backup. I'm not taking any fucking chances.

I tiptoe into the room and they're so lost in what they're doing that they don't notice me by the bedroom door about to exit.

"Thanks for the show, Michael." I laugh.

I want him to know it's me who will completely ruin his life.

His face pales in horror and he pushes his partner off him. I recognize who it is. I had sociology with him this semester. But his identity is safe.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" He screams but I've already opened the door and rushing down the corridor and then the stairs.

I can't believe I'm able to run in these shoes. I half expect to hear him screaming but he doesn't, I look back and he's got murder in his eyes but he's quiet about it as he tries to catch up with me.

I burst through the front door, knocking over a few people and run down the driveway.

The car is too far, I didn't fucking think this through so I run around a random car to create a buffer between us and catch my breath. My heart hammers in my chest and my body is trembling from the adrenaline surge.

"YOU FUCKING BITCH." Michael seethes.

"Wrong f word, darling. You mean fabulous." I cackle out of breath.

He's shivering with anger, his jaw tight and about to snap.

"What are you going to do with that?" His voice wavers.

"What you did to José."

"He's gonna kill me, Ana. Please."

"I don't care, Michael," tears begin to trickle down my face. "What you did killed José. I don't care what happens to you."

"Please," he pleads, "I didn't have a choice. My dad… he… Ana, please."

"I don't care, Michael." I calmly reply. "Actions have consequences and this is your consequence. Which you so richly deserve."

He rounds the car but I continue to circle it in time and remain out of his reach.

"Even if you do catch me, I've forwarded the video to the appropriate back up locations. I'm not the only one who knows your secret." I lie but I know he'll believe me, "did you for once think what José' dad would do to him? You're weren't the only one in the closet but you outed someone against their will to save your own ass. You deserve the exact same to be done to you. I don't fucking care what it costs you because frankly speaking, it won't be enough. He actually loved you. You were such an asshole to him but he loved you."

"I loved him too," he confesses, "but… I couldn't," he chokes on his words. "Ana, please."

The power I feel is indescribable. This asshole who roamed the high school halls like he was a king is now at my mercy, begging me for it.

I see the desperation in his face but I feel nothing for him because all that haunts me is a pool of red and a lifeless gray face. It's haunted me almost every single night since that day.

"Bull-fucking-shit! You didn't love him or you wouldn't have done this." I reply, "You threw him to the fucking wolves."

He's in the middle of getting ready to reply when someone calls Michael's name and he looks back to see who it is. I take this as my chance to run and get to Kate's car, thanking the Lord that I'm the DD tonight. I'm clearly out of his sight by the time Michael has a chance to pay attention to me again because I hear him call out to me in a panic.

I get into the car and drive. I see him run after it when he realizes it's me who's driving away and watch him give up eventually as I reach towards the end of the long street and turn out.

When I'm a few streets away, I park and take a deep breath. Taking my phone out, I see that it's past midnight and message Kate to tell her to call me as soon as she wants to leave and that I'm taking a break in the car because I have a headache.

When in reality, I'm simply deciding on which online platform I'm going to use to besmirch the reputation of UDub's rising football star. Everyone deserves to know that he's a liar and murderer.

The more I think about it, the pit in my stomach grows. My hands shake and soon my body is trembling uncontrollably. I break down and cry, hugging myself. I haven't been able to fully cry since José' death. In fact, I didn't cry at all. I just absorbed it all and suppressed it.

Now, it's all coming to the surface and ripping my resolve to shreds. In the corner of my mind, I see José's smiling face with his arm around me as he takes a selfie.

But in reality, it's just my phone wallpaper that glows with a calendar reminder that it's his birthday.


A/N: Over a year in and Ana hasn't been able to let go and now she's at a crossroads. What will she do? Two more chapters left!