Major Wooing (or How to Woo a Major in Ten Easy Steps)
Chapter 2
Summary: Rodney discovers ways to woo John through scientific experimentation.
Having no real idea how to go about wooing someone, Rodney recalled an obscure article he'd read once, when bored out of his mind during a doctor's visit, entitled 'How to Woo a Woman in Ten Easy Steps.' Using it as a template for winning over the Major, Rodney contemplated the ten steps involved:
1. Dress for Success
2. Clean up your act
3. Brush up on sexual knowledge
4. Pay attention to details
5. Small and thoughtful beats big and grandiose
6. Don't become best friends before the relationship gets romantic
7. Do what you say you're going to do but not more
8. Make sure she equates you with fun
9. Make her laugh
10. Cook her dinner
-----------1. Dress for Success.
Using proximity, duration of eye contact, length of time spent in the same room, and physical contact, Rodney was somewhat surprised to find that the data heavily supported his wearing of the blue, short-sleeved shirt that was part of his daily uniform, rather than the civilian shirt he thought flattered him best. The chart he gazed upon reflected a clear and dramatic increase in all four measured variables.
Saving that information into an encrypted, password-locked file with the rest of the data, Rodney knew he'd have to wear those blue shirts sparingly or they would lose their reinforcement value.
"McKay."
Rodney looked up to find the Major in the doorway, those hazel eyes skimming over the tight fitting shirt that had been accidentally washed in hot water.
"Major?"
The tip of a pink tongue poked out to move over dry lips.
"Major?"
The Major looked up sharply, a flush rising up his neck. "Ah…Briefing. We have a briefing in five minutes."
"Are you alright?"
"Fine...Fine."
Rodney smiled as he watched the Major turn and flee, knowing he'd have to conduct further testing to discover exactly how tight those shirts needed to be for the maximum reaction.
---tbc
