Major Wooing (or How to Woo a Major in Ten Easy Steps)

Chapter 4

Summary: What a man in love will do.

3. Brush up on sexual knowledge

Brushing up on sexual knowledge seemed reasonable, Rodney thought to himself, considering he'd only ever experimented with men as far as mutual hand jobs in the past. After the near fiasco with Carson in the infirmary, there was no way he was going to ask his friend about how to have sex with a man. He'd die of embarrassment long before he got the words out and he had a feeling Carson didn't want to know that much about his sex life anyway.

Given that there wasn't a copy of The Cookbook of Gay Sex to be found anywhere in the city and the Ancients described positions Rodney was positive weren't humanly possible, another source of information would have to be found.

Rodney spent nearly a week contemplating who else to approach for further education on same-sex relationships. He considered - and dismissed - nearly everyone on Atlantis. Living in such tight quarters made keeping secrets difficult and he had no intention of broadcasting to anyone what he was doing.

That was how he found himself in the Athosian village. Having expressed a vague interest in the ore veins near the village, Rodney spent a few hours one afternoon conducting scans. Halling had accompanied him and after a great deal of fumbling around the subject, Halling brightened with understanding.

During a conversation with Teyla on human courting rituals on an off-world mission, they had come to learn that the Athosians were very open-minded regarding love and sex. Rodney followed Halling back into the village as the sun was setting and hoped he'd made the right decision.

Dinner was pleasant and friendly and afterwards Halling motioned him to a hut. "Dr. McKay, this is Arden. I've taken the liberty of discussing your situation with him and he's agreed to assist. Should you need anything further, I'll be in my hut," and before Rodney could say a word, Halling was gone.

"Ah… Arden." Great, it had been bad enough imagining talking to Halling about this, now he was supposed to talk to a complete stranger?

Arden was a tall, good-looking man with long, golden locks. He was younger than Halling and had a broad chest. His skin was tanned from hours of working the fields.

"Dr. McKay, please relax. This will be an enjoyable experience for all."

Rodney's eyes doubled in size. "Wh-what?"

The man began stripping out of his clothes, revealing more of that smooth, sun-kissed skin. "Take off your clothes."

"I…I really think you have the wrong idea. This isn't what I meant when I spoke with Halling - "

Arden gazed at him thoughtfully for a moment, then brightened. "Of course. One moment please." The Athosian disappeared into another room and Rodney thought he might collapse from shock. When Teyla had said her people were open-minded, he'd really had no clue what she meant.

Arden returned with another Athosian, similar in build but with curly black hair. "This is Keris, my companion. I have explained to him your desire for your first time to be with your beloved and he is willing to have you observe."

"Ob…Observe?" Rodney squeaked.

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The next morning when the Major exited the Jumper to collect Rodney, he found the scientist packed and typing furiously into his laptop.

"I can't imagine ore being that exciting."

Rodney quickly saved and closed the file, snapping shut the laptop as he attempted to regulate his breathing. "You're right, it's not. Shall we go?" He picked up his things and headed for the Jumper without another word. Stopping just inside the Jumper, he turned to look back at the Major and realized he'd have to construct a completely different database to test out all the new theories flying around in his head.

As he took in the cutting figure of the Major in his uniform, Rodney realized he'd need two databases to hold the data from all the testing he wanted to conduct.

---tbc