Title
Author: Caithness
Category: Angst
Summary: A year on Seefra has alienated Beka from the people she loves. In an attempt to reach out to some one, she compromises the crew and the ship.
Disclaimer: They're not mine and I'm no screenwriter, but I'm willing to sleep my way to the top. You'll find my number scratched above a urinal somewhere. Gimme a call.
Beka's father had never wanted children. For that matter, neither had her mother, from what she understood. She thought Daddy had loved her, but Uncle Sid had managed to plant a small seed of doubt in her mind that she constantly had to ignore. She had no idea what was going on in Rafe's head. As for her crew-
"Hey, boss," Harper chirped as she entered the conference room. "Manage not to sleep with anyone on the way down here?"
Beka's mouth opened slightly as she tried to catch her breath and her eyes grew wide for a split second, but she recovered and took her place at the table. "Harper, this is your only warning," Dylan said with all the fake sternness that he could muster.
"Don't put yourself out," Beka muttered. She gave Harper a long stare that dared him to make another comment. He didn't.
"Harper, how's it coming?" Dylan asked.
"Well, after exactly thirteen Sparky Colas, I finally got access to Andromeda's systems."
"So did I," Rommie added with bitterness. Beka looked at the table and tried to hide behind her hair.
"Gimme a day and she'll be like new."
"Sounds good," Dylan replied.
"No, it doesn't," Trance said.
Beka looked up at the latest incarnation of Trance. So did everyone else in the room. No one ever knew what the golden girl was going to say. "You need to sleep first," she continued. "Just a couple hour, please."
"I can't," Harper argued. "We're sitting ducks until Andromeda gets fixed and who knows when lover boy will come back for round two." Beka couldn't ignore the double entendre and what it implied.
"Harper, you're working yourself to death."
"Well, whose fault is that?" Harper spat as he left the room. Dylan didn't even bother stopping him.
"I'm sorry," Beka murmured. She'd said it so many times, she didn't think she could say it again. It was a matter of principle. You say it once, people get the idea and they either forgive you or they don't. If they don't, who needs 'em? This time, though, she was so sorry that it had overpowered her pride and she'd said it yet again.
"We know you're sorry," Rommie answered. "You said it once on the observation deck, three times on command, twice in-"
"I get it. You're still mad at me. Enough already."
"I am not mad. I am a completely objective observer."
"You're a warship. Wrath is pretty much your thing, but I've had enough."
"Do you think you deserve anything else?" Rhade asked, speaking for the first time since Beka had entered the room.
"I see. Everyone has something to say," Beka shouted. "Alright, Rhade, why don't you say it?"
"Fine!" Rhade stood up. "You brought back some stranger from a supply run and all it took was a little sweet talk for him to get your pants down around your ankles!"
"Rhade, not another word," Dylan commanded, turning toward the Nietzschean.
Rhade ignored him. "Next thing I know, he's bypassed all of Andromeda's codes and his friends have hijacked the ship! You're telling me that's a coincidence?"
"It was already determined that Beka had no culpability. The hijackers used her to gain entrance codes only."
"So she just gave them the codes?" Rhade asked.
"No, he slipped her sodium pentathol. Truth serum. She gave him the codes in her sleep. Her only real mistake was believing that he loved her and then bringing him onto the ship."
"Right, because it's so outlandish that some one might find me attractive."
"Well, look at the last few times it happened," Rhade said as he took his seat again. "There were the Nietzscheans who disabled your ship, the man who stole your DNA, not to mention the one who betrayed the entire commonwealth."
"All that proves is that Nietzscheans are scum."
"This is no longer productive," Rommie said.
"I agree. Dismissed." Dylan stood up and left, followed by Rommie. Trance lingered a moment, then stood and left to check on Harper, patting Beka on the shoulder as she went. Rhade, however, stayed behind. He wasn't about to let Beka's last comment stand, but when he looked at, he couldn't yell at her anymore. Her shoulders were slumped slight- just barely, but enough for him to notice. Her hair had fallen in her face a bit and she'd left it there. Her face was pale. It was her eyes, though, that stopped him. She was looking down at the table, so he could only see part of them, but they were pinkish like she hadn't slept in days. When she looked up at him, they were so devoid of the usual fire and pride he saw there. He remembered how he'd pulled the wings from a butterfly when he was young and didn't know any better. It had hopped around frantically afterwards and he'd tried to put the wings back on, but no matter what, he couldn't make it fly anymore, so he'd killed it. Had he done the same thing to Beka?
"What are you looking at?" she whispered, bracing herself for another attack.
"Nothing." He turned and left Beka by herself.
TBC
