disclaimer: not mine

Gil managed to get both of them back to the Denali and secured Catherine into the back seat. He knew she wouldn't be waking up any time soon but wasn't taking any chances of her running again. He sat in the doorway beside her gathering his thoughts.

The first issue he had to deal with was their vehicles. He couldn't risk leaving them here. He could call someone from the lab but then they would want to now what was going on and he couldn't risk that. He could call a tow truck but there was nothing wrong with his car and having her's towed would alert Ecklie that something had happened. He would have her Denali inspected and find the evidence. That definitely couldn't happen. She would loose everything. He could call her mother but she was already worried and angry. If Catherine came to with her mother driving it wouldn't be good. Then there was Sam Braun. Calling him woud open both of them up to blackmail. That idea was definitely out. He finally settled on calling Philip Kane, a friend of his who was also a psychiatrist that had helped them on several cases. He stepped away from the vehicle before dialing.

"Dr. Kane's office." It was his receptionist.

"This is Gil Grissom. I need to speak with Philip."

"One moment please. The receptionist transferred him straight through to Philip.

"Gil, how have you been?"

"Alright. Listen, I need your help."

"Straight to the point today, aren't we? This must be a big case."

"Actually no. It's personal."

"What's going on?"

"I'm in the desert with Catherine. She's…she…she's not doing well at all. She can't drive and I can't leave our vehicles. Could you and Louise run out here and drive my care back?

"No problem. I have to cancel a couple of appointments first."

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

"Gil, what's wrong with Catherine? You could have easily called someone from work to help you out."

"She's…I'm not sure. I've never seen her like this." He looked back to the Denali and saw her stirring.

"Listen, she's coming to. I need to get back to her."

"Does she need an ambulance?"

"NO! Sorry, didn't mean to yell. Philip, would you mind clearing the rest of the day? I think she really needs to talk to someone."

"We'll be there in an hour."

The call ended and he went back to the Denali. She was still out but she was having some sort of nightmare. Gil sat on the edge of the seat beside her, stroking her hair.

"It's Ok. You're safe. I promise you that." He pushed back her hair from her face noticing for the first time the cut on her forehead. The realization that she was physically hurt from her fall hit him. He reached over Catherine, grabbing her kit from the back knowing it would contain some of the items needed to clean her wounds.

He took a couple of swabs out of their containers, poured some alcohol on them and then cleaned out the cut thoroughly before covering it was gauze and tape. He inspected the rest of her head for cuts, bruises and bumps, not finding any. He continued down her body. Disinfecting the scratches, wiping away the dried blood and sand as best he could.

Her ankle was bruised, swollen and possibly broken. She had definitely sprained it, of that there was no doubt. He'd have to take her to the emergency room and have it check. The only problem was explaining her current state. If he waited till she sobered up they would want to know why she didn't come in when the accident happened.

His mind went back to her mental state. The nurses and doctors would surely notice she was suicidal, if not she was awefully close. There was a chance that they would admit her to a psych ward.

"Damn!" He wanted to help her but helping her would mean she'd be found out. Being found out meant loosing everything she'd worked for. He couldn't and wouldn't do that to her. He'd take her after he blood alcohol levels fell to normal levels. He would just tell the physician that they didn't think her ankle was seriously injured when it happened.

Next on his list was Lily Flynn, Catherine's mom.

"Willow's residence."

"Lily, this is Gil Grissom. I'm calling about Catherine."

"She still hasn't come home."

"I know, she's with me."

"That figures."

"Lily, listen. She's hurt. I'm going to take her to the hospital. If anyone from the lab calls for either of us tell them to call me on my cell."

"Hurt? What happened?"

"She fell, twisted her ankle. I'll bring her home later. Didn't want you to worry."

"Why would I worry? She left here drunk after pissing off Lindsey. She deserves what she gets." Lily hung up before Gil could respond.

Gil looked at his watch. They were due back at the lab in five hours. He needed to get that taken care of. He quickly dialed Warrick's cell.

"Brown." His voice was groggy.

"Warrick, it's Grissom"

"Yo, Gris. Why are you calling at this hour? Something wrong?"

"No. Yes. Well not really. I just need you to cover Swing and Graveyard tonight. My mom called. She needs me to come out for a few days to help her with something."

"Cath can't do it?"

"She , um fell down. Hurt her ankle. Called me about an hour ago."

"How bad?"

"Honestly, I don't know. Just said it hurts pretty bad so she's going to stay home."

"Uh, Gris. Why didn't she call me or Nick since we're on her team?"

"Old habits I guess. You've done it also." Warrick laughed. This was true. He'd called Grissom several times by accident when he was running late.

"No problem."

"Thanks, Warrick. I owe you." Gil hung up.

Next he looked through the Denali searching for materials to use for a make-shift splint for her ankle. He gently lifted her leg onto his lap and put the splint in place, securing it with crime scene tape. The discomfort this caused Catherine was enough to wake her.

"Ouch!" She pulled her leg away from him, slamming it into the seat in the process. "Ah!" The pain she felt was intense. Her reaction was to jerk her leg again but Gil grabbed it before she could inflict more damage on it.

"Calm down." He tried to still her but she pulled away.

"My leg."

"You fell."

"What?"

"You fell in the desert when you were running. I'm fairly certain you've broken your ankle." She looked at her leg and saw the make-shift splint. Still being somewhat inebriated she laughed.

"So you processed it as a crime scene?" She laughed loudly.

"I was attempting to make a splint so you wouldn't do any more damage."

"So, are we going to stay here in the desert or what?"

"Catherine, you can't drive. You're still drunk."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"I am not!" Gil saw that arguing the point would go nowhere fast so he decided to try another tactic, which when he thought about it made much more sense.

"Your ankle---you can't drive with that ankle."

"Oh yes I can!" A drunk Catherine was infinitely more stubborn and determined than a sober Catherine. She moved to get out of the Denali.

"I wouldn't do that…" But she did.

"Damn! Catherine fell to the ground in pain. Gil sat where he was.

"I tried to tell…"

"Shut up!" She attempted to pull herself up only to fall back down the instant she put pressure on her foot. She glared at Gil who was still sitting in the car.

"A little help. Please." She held her hand out for him to pull her up. Gil just looked at her without moving.

"Fine. I'll just stay where I'm at." She ran her hands aimlessly through the dirt and sand, throwing pebbles at nothing in particular.

"OK. I'm drunk. I'll admit it. So what. It's not like it's illegal." Catherine took a cautious glance at Gil.

"Besides it's not like I was busted off the strip like Sara was." Her hand stumbled over a stick. She picked it up and began tracing circles in the sand.

"You came to her rescue though, didn't you? I'll be she was a LOT more grateful than me." She paused to see his reaction.

"Of course she was probably disappointed when you got her apartment seeing how you do not indulge in 'personal stuff.' Probably had to get herself off after you left."

"Catherine." His voice was tight but she didn't notice.

"Probably has a vibrator in her bedside table. Or maybe she has a fuck buddy she called after you left. Probably didn't mind her screaming your name while he banged her."

"Catherine stop it." He knew she was still drunk but she was pushing the line.

"At least I hope he didn't. That happened once when me and Eddie were fucking each other. He was so pisssed. Hell, I was shocked myself. It came out of nowhere. He was pounding me…"

"Catherine."

"…hard and fast and I'm screaming…"

"Catherine."

"…and all of a sudden I scream out…Gil, what do you do to get off? I mean I know you have to do something. We all do. God, Eddie! When he heard me he slapped the shit out of me and just went at me harder than he was before. I tried to get him to stop but…well, aren't you going to tell me?" She waited for him to answer but he didn't

"I think that's the night Lindsey was conceived. Probably explains why she's such a bitch." Still no response from Gil.

"Should have never had her. Wouldn't have if Eddie hadn't stopped me. Well, he didn't really stop me. He had some coke and well I just couldn't resist." His face was red and she could see the veins in his forehead throbbing. "Next thing you know we're going at each other and I scream out that name again. Well, with both of us being high it turned into this major fight. Eddie was beating the shit out of me and it hit me. There was this life inside me and all of a sudden I felt this urge to protect it. And I feel myself fighting back with all I've got. I broke three of his ribs. And for what? A 12 year old brat who hates my guts." She looks back at him and sees the pain in his eyes.

"You never did answer the question. How do you get off? I'll bet you do it at the lab because you're always there. In the observation room while Brass is talking to some hooker? Or maybe in the evidence room? Or is it the morgue? Maybe you like to fuck recently dead women. Bodies still somewhat warm but no risk of a response that would make you reveal anything more about yourself." He was now biting his lip.

"I'll bet you couldn't even get it up with a live woman." She pulls herself back into the Denali.

"Shit! That hurts." She leans on Gil as she drags her leg up behind her.

"See, I can take you in my hand and nothing." She slid her hand into his pants, grabbing his manhood roughly. Gil pushed her away but she just came back again.

"I knew it. Can't even stand the touch of a live woman." She hissed in his ear as her hand slid back down to his pants.

"Oh, what's this? Either I got my wish or you do respond to live women." She was stroking him hard now.

"So which is it? Am I dead or are you wanting this?" Gil tries to push her away again with no success.

"I know you want it. I know you want me." She straddles him as best she can without moving her ankle.

"You want to know a secret. It was your name I was screaming when I was fucking Eddie." She was still hissing into his ear. "It was your fault he beat the shit out of me. It's your fault I have a fucking kid. It's your fault I'm here right now." She pulled off of him before he could come.

"You took away what I wanted most today. Now I'm taking what you want away from you. Go to hell, Gil!"

She never noticed the look on his face or the fact that he never touched her while she was on top of him. She didn't notice his silence. Or the fact that he just sat there, watching her, not worried about his needs. Even if she had she wouldn't have cared.