A/N I do not own Death Note and only take credit for Everest.
The door to Misa's room was left open, and I walked in to hear Misa saying, "That's obvious, of course it's gonna be Light. I'm really grateful to Kira and want to meet him some day in person, but that's not true love. I definitely choose Light." The model clung to Light's arm like a leech.
"But, your precious Light is planning to catch Kira, isn't that right?" L 's strangely melodic voice asked.
"Well, yes, of course I am."
"He says he wants to catch Kira," the detective lurched forward, gazing up with panda eyes, "now, what will you do?"
"Well," Misa said with a stubborn edge to her voice, "if that's what Light says, then I'm gonna support him no matter what."
"I see," L mused. "So, if you were given the opportunity to work with Light on this investigation, would you take the offer?"
"What?" Light exclaimed in astonishment, "Ryuzaki…" The man's protest fell into nothingness as Misa leapt up at the proposition.
"Yeah! Of course I would! I'd do anything I could to help Light," she spoke eagerly. Is this what blind devotion was like? Perhaps it was love? I couldn't quite tell. Perhaps Misa couldn't, either. From what I had been told, love often induced foolishness. No. No, blind devotion was Misa's dedication to Kira. Love was…?
What? The thought stumped my mind. It occurred to me that I didn't quite know. My brother had been troubled, even when we were young. He had been kind, yes, and protective. A good brother. We cared for each other – partly due to having only each other. Besides, if we did love each other as siblings did, we had never said as much. Yet, he was my brother, my only living relative, and he cared for me. That was enough.
"Wait, hold on a second," Light's fervent protest stopped my whirring thoughts in their tracks. "Where are you going with this?"
"I'm planning to have Aiber pose as Eraldo Coil again," L explained. "He'll tell the Yotsuba members that while he was investigating L, he discovered that Misa Amane might know who he is. He'll also tell them that L brought her in for questioning under the suspicion that she was the second Kira."
"That part is true," Misa reminded him, scowling at the long haired detective.
"If the Yotsuba Group believes that Misa could be their lead to finding L," he continued, "then they'll say that they want to meet her to discuss their advertising campaign. They'll use that opportunity to question her. Thanks to Matsuda's screw up, they might already be considering Misa as their new spokesperson, so this could work."
"Yeah, right!" Misa chirped.
"We can't do that," Light argued.
"Why not?" Misa whined.
"This plan is too risky, who knows what could happen to you."
"Oh, wow! Does that mean you're worried about me? Yay!" She jumped forward and wrapped her arms around his frame. "But don't worry, I won't mind doing something like this if it's for you, Light."
"Listen, Misa, if they suspect that you might know who L really is, we don't know how far they'll be willing to go to get that information."
"No problemo. I promise I won't say anything, even if they torture me."
L wandered across the room to a painting on the wall, saying, "I can attest to that."
"But Kira can control his victims' actions before their death, there's a good chance he might try to manipulate her into revealing what she knows and then kill her! Also, if he does manage to kill L, he won't have any use for Misa. He'd kill her to keep her silent."
The girl in question began whimpering, "I don't like the sound of that."
{E.B.}
"Would you rather have me send Endo?" L asked the other man, knowing that Light would refuse just as, if not more, furiously as he just had. The woman he now referred to had been leaning against the doorframe this whole time, her electric blue eyes trained on the scene unfolding before her. Neither Light nor Misa had noticed. "She'd be better suited, after all." Yes, he thought, Ever's mastery of disguise and experience makes her the perfect candidate for this task. However, L also knew that she was a faceless entity, just as he was, the work and planning that would be required for her to adopt a new identity couldn't be put together on such short notice.
"No," Light protested through gritted teeth, "if Kira gets to Endo, we have even more to lose. She knows everything about this investigation, and she knows even more about you. We can't risk that."
Ever laughed, and it sent a strange chill up L's spine. He knew her laugh, her voice, even the sound of her footsteps, but he didn't know this eerie, bell-like quality. She had moved closer to them, and there was a gleam to her eye, the promise that she knew something nobody else would ever know, "They'd never get to me."
"You don't know that!" Light protested. L observed the other man's aggravation reach new heights as Ever's certainty struck a chord in him, and he noted the tranquility Ever regarded the young genius with. "You're one of the best detectives in the world, Reika, and you haven't gotten caught yet, but that doesn't mean that you're invincible. Anything they would do to Misa, they would do to you. I can't put your life on the line like that."
"So, you would prefer Misa's cooperation?" L spoke before Everest could respond to Light's caution.
Light glared at him with a heat that could have melted the handcuffs off their wrists, "No! I would prefer if neither of them was put into danger!"
"Light," L held a finger up to Light's face, "you forget that if we win against Kira, neither Misa nor Endo will die. Besides, as long as we're handcuffed together, you and I share the same fate. If I die, so will you. If that happens, Misa is the one who would grieve most of all."
"You don't think I would grieve for you?" Ever asked shrewdly.
"No," he replied. "I can't imagine you would waste any time on us. Regardless, Light, either we lose and both die together, or we successfully catch Kira." Abruptly, he turned to the blonde, asking, "Which is it?"
"We catch Kira!" Misa exclaimed. "I would never dream about living in a world without Light."
Ever choked on her laughter, and even L couldn't help but quip, "Yes, that would be dark."
"Cut it out! This is just crazy!" Light continued his pointless arguing. Surely, Light Yagami had to know that they had to use every tool in their arsenal, including Misa and Everest. Even Everest. The woman knew that. In fact, L believed that was why she had been reckless and revealed herself to Reiji Namikawa.
"We're running out of time, and I'm starting to get desperate. As for Misa Amane, I've turned to her because I know her bravery and love for you is boundless," L chose his words carefully. E coughed to cover up another laugh from Misa's couch. The woman had made herself comfortable in Amane's room, and L was reminded of another blue-eyed detective who made himself comfortable in others' quarters. The model, of course, had fallen for L's flattery, as he knew she would, and either didn't hear or chose to ignore Everest's amusement. L was certain it was the former.
The model clasped her hands together, eyes glimmering with an appreciation rooted in the validation of her emotions, "Do you really mean it?" Of course he didn't. "Oh, no," she lamented, "I think I've totally misunderstood you this entire time! I even called you a pervert!"
"That one, I believe, stands independent of understanding," Ever remarked, her expression a combination of annoyance and amusement.
Amane continued over his comrade's comment as if she fully intended to ignore the brunette altogether, "But you actually do understand, how I feel don't you?"
"Yes," L affirmed with ease. With his back to Light and Misa, Ever was the only one in the room able to see his face. Her vividly hued eyes never left his, and he was unable to suppress the playfulness of his tone as he spoke, "Misa is indisputably the most perfect and worthy woman for Light." Everest recoiled slightly as Misa cheered and fixed L with an entirely annoyed glare.
You're responsible for any more of her romantic foolishness after this. That is what she was thinking, L was sure. He was about to verbally comment in response to her unspoken thoughts when Misa skipped forward and kissed his cheek. His eyes widened at the contact as she flitted away,"You're such a sweetie! Thank you, Ryuzaki."
It was rare for L to be caught off guard. In fact he could count five events in his entire lifetime that had truly surprised him. Three of those events had occurred in Japan within the past year and a half. The first, had been finding E in Japan after so long. The second, had been the suggestion of shinigami. The third, was this foreign expression of affection. Of course, it wasn't as though the children at Wammy's were starved of such expressions. He had often witnessed A bestow sweet kisses onto the younger children's cheeks. Yet, as he brought his hand to his cheek, the statistics flew through his mind, all various possibilities for the future brought into being by this one action.
"I could actually fall for you," he stated. He had been so distracted by his thoughts, that he hadn't noticed how Ever's hands tightly clasped in her lap as she regarded L's reaction with a curious expression.
{E.B.}
"Let's not go that far," Misa dissuaded the detective. I couldn't explain the source of that gnawing anger I felt the moment L's vacant eyes widened. I would like to say that it was a primal sense of possessiveness. The kind of territorial attachment alpha mammals exhibit within their packs and established space. Or, I could attribute it to the displeasure of having our silent conversation interrupted. However, if I said that, I suppose I would be lying. The unspoken thought nagging at me has crossed my mind before, not that I've ever addressed it to give the ridiculous, fleeting notion any validation. Perhaps, for all my talk of truth, I'm a liar at my core. "But you could, maybe, be a friend of mine. Would that be okay?"
L tilted his head thoughtfully, "Yes. So, now I've gained yet another friend."
"Watari would be so proud," I remarked blandly, growing irritable as the conversation seemed to have abandoned me altogether.
"Yeah!" Misa giggled, "Of course, any friend of Light's is a friend of mine, as well." Her hand took hold of Light and L's, who had also linked hands as the blonde threw them into a momentum driven loop. "Let's all be friends together."
Clever girl, I thought with amusement, still at my place on the couch. She had very easily, and literally, isolated me. I wondered if she was even aware of what she was doing or if she was simply a cruel person without even realizing it. Nevertheless, I wouldn't say that the display truly bothered me. The image of L's long fingers gently cupping his own cheek flashed behind my eyes.
"Whee," L's droll tone comically contrasted with his words, "Yay. Fun."
"And, of course, I would never think of betraying any of my friends," Misa declared as she escaped the loop. "With our powers combined, we'll arrest Kira!"
"You haven't told her?" I asked L in regards to his newly made friend as it became apparent what he was doing. The reminder of my presence seemed to put a damper on Misa's jovial mood, and the model glared at me sharply before pouting prettily.
"I was just getting to that," the other detective affirmed. "Unfortunately, Light's taking a different investigative approach from us and will be working with his father and the others. I'm afraid it will just be you and I."
"Huh?" Misa questioned. "What's up with that? Don't tell me my Light's going to be working alone with her."
I met her heated gaze with my own, unbothered reaction, "I'll be conducting my own investigation. Surprisingly enough, of all the people in this room, I think you're the only one who would approve."
An innocent curiosity took over her features as she addressed me again, "Oh, really? What are you going to do?"
"She's going to seduce Reiji Namikawa," L stated flatly.
"Come on, L, now you're just playing dirty," Light's voice trembled with restraint. "You're leaving me with no other choice but to join your group."
"No, that's quite alright. She isn't really going to seduce Namikawa, anyway."
"What are you talking about?" Misa's shrill voice spoke above L's quiet murmur. "Of course, he'll be joining us."
"That's not it either!"
"If we convinced Endo to cooperate, would that help?" L mused, his thumb pressed against the corner of his lips.
"No!" Light protested. "I've been opposed to this investigation since the beginning. It's too dangerous for her!"
Misa relaxed her stance and gazed at Light with unadultered adoration, "Oh, Light, you're so sweet. Thank you for worrying about me, but please let me do this. I want to be useful to you somehow. If I can be useful, then maybe you'll love me even more, and, besides, I would gladly die if it were for you, Light." Disgust coiled in my chest.
How wasteful.
"Ah, so it's not about Endo," L concluded. I watched the entire atmosphere shift at L's words. Misa's own bright gaze seemed to have dulled significantly, and the tension returned to Light's posture, as if he had to re-establish his guard after Misa's declaration of love.
"Don't try to pull that card, Ryuzaki," Light warned, a strange quality in his voice somehow stood apart from his other protestations with L. "I don't want E involved in this any more than you do, but this is what she does, and I can't do anything about it."
"That's right," I spoke up, now resting my elbows on the arm of the chair with my chin cupped by the junction formed by my hands. "I'm glad that you understand that, Light."
"So it really wouldn't bother you if she seduced Namikawa?" L pressed.
"Would you stop that?" I asked of my former housemate, growing annoyed with the very suggestion. "There are other ways to acquire information than exploiting the fact that I have breasts. Sometimes, I forget that you're just another man." Light, for his part, seemed stunned at my outburst, and Misa seemed slightly confused by my sudden hostility.
"You don't think of me as a man?" L questioned, unbothered by the tone I had taken with him.
"You don't think of me as an equal," I retorted. Nobody in the room made a sound as we waited for L to answer me. Although, it had been a statement. I wasn't asking anything. Inside of that spiky haired head of his existed an arrogant and infallibly brilliant mind.
His simple reply came as no surprise, "Of course not." Our gazes locked, neither challenging nor communicative. It seemed like the first time in a long while that I was unable to read the thoughts in L's expression and the first time that I found him unable to read mine.
"Hey, Ryuzaki, you can't just say something like that," Light chastised the other man.
"Why not?" both L and I questioned simultaneously with similar tones of ignorance.
"It's degrading!" Light insisted, but the vehemence behind his words was lost on us. He had spent the better half of his life raised on a pedestal ahead of the race, and I had spent most of mine trying to catch up with him. "Endo's brilliant, and she puts a lot of effort into her work. Without her, we wouldn't know what civilians are saying about Kira on a day to day basis. Is it really that difficult for you to see her as an equal? She's the one you should see as worthy of taking your place, not me." His defensive words intrigued me. I wondered if this is really what Light thought of me and my role as an investigator, but, then again, he did tend to let his emotions get the better of him.
"Light," L responded with a seldom used sharpness in his tone, "I've witnessed E lead investigations to complete failure. She is prone to subjectivity and misjudgment. It's generally known that she and I aren't equals. That being said, I've come across very few people capable of, and fewer who have come close to, achieving for themselves the prowess that E has worked for."
His blatant respect seemed to surprise Light, and I had to admit that it caught me off guard. L had never expressed his regard for me in such a straightforward manner. It was uncharacteristically honest of him, and I couldn't help but feel a twinge of pride. I knew for a fact that he never praised other children from the boarding house.
"That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me," the thought wasn't meant to be spoken aloud, but it had slipped through my lips as if they had willed themselves into being out of a need to be shared.
"You've said that before," L responded flippantly.
"No," I stated firmly, observing the detective whose eyes were vacantly guarded and whose stance suggested no agitation. "I'd bet that this is the nicest thing you've ever said in your life." Our eyes met, vibrant blue and coal black communicating and concealing thoughts that could very well never be uttered out loud.
You'd win that bet.
{E.B.}
I encountered L again while fixing a late night snack in the kitchen. He sat at the bar with a large slice of strawberry cake placed on a delicate saucer before him. "You still have to report on your excursion to Wales," L stated around a mouthful of whipped cream and cake.
"I don't believe I do," I replied thoughtfully while opening one of the dessert coolers in search of Watari's black forest cake. "After all, you never told me about the estate." He paused with an impaled strawberry centimeters from his open mouth.
"It wouldn't have helped," he reasoned, lowering his fork to the plate. "He was gone by the time we arrived, and you've relinquished all ownership rights."
"I should have been told," I maintained despite the sheer logic of the situation that had long ago passed. I waited for him to retort with a well-thought argument as I sat beside him with a plate full of cake, but he poked at a heap of cream wordlessly.
"Watari advised me not to inform you about the estate," he finally admitted. "It would have done more harm than good at the time. If we had given you a reason to follow him, you would have gone immediately." I couldn't deny this recollection. I had been looking for a reason to leave Wammy's and follow my brother. If I had been provided this kind of concrete evidence to my brother's apparent madness, I would have gone in a heartbeat. It's funny how deeply bonds can extend. For someone as young as I had been at the time to have been so willing to forsake the home that had sheltered us in favor of a lunatic murderer who had barely reached the threshold of affectionate, it was almost sad.
"Well, I can never stay too mad at Watari."
"Did you find what you were looking for?" L asked conversationally while we sat together eating cake.
He was, of course, referring to my search into my parentage, and I certainly wasn't about to tell him the truth. Beyond and I were the spawn of an otherworldly god and a murderess. It wouldn't doing much for myself, and I couldn't say that I felt any particular desire to share these findings with him. "A young woman in Wales conceived and bore two illegitimate children and married another wealthy man to cover it up," I recited as if reading a headline. "Not very original, is it?"
He hummed his agreement, "And your biological father?"
I smiled and shrugged, "An illegal immigrant."
"A dead end." It was spectacular how easily that man's suspicions could be roused. Perhaps it was just a little too convenient that I would go all the way to my birthplace and find everything but the missing puzzle piece.
"A dead end," I repeated, smile still in place. "I am certain of one thing, though."
"Hm?"
"I haven't gone mad."
L glanced at me, a perfect display of uninterest, "You didn't have to go all the way back to Wales to make that conclusion."
"Are you saying you missed me?"
"I'm saying you're hiding something," L quipped without a hint of accusation in his tone.
"A woman has to have her secrets," I shrugged and lowered a fork onto the cake, pushing around the airy dessert without actually eating any. "We'd never get anywhere in this business if we didn't."
"Have you changed your stance on the issue of privacy?"
My mouth quirked into another smile, appreciating L's penchant for misplaced humor. No, he didn't care about my views on privacy. L knew as well as I did that we would be nothing without our secrets. It was why we paraded around these letters instead of our names. They were reminders that we didn't really exist. L and E were entities, impersonal beings not unlike super computers designed to solve crime and bring justice. L Lawliet and Escallonia Birthday, however, were a pair of orphans with a weak spot for sweets and their own complex feelings and mannerisms that would never be shared with the world. Without their secrets, they'd be exposed. Vulnerable. Ordinary.
"Of course not," I replied. "I'm an open book."
"Yes," L drawled, "if that book was written in Mayan Code and translated into a text only you could decipher." We lapsed into silence after that, eating our respective cakes without comment. Finally, L spoke in a darkly serious tone, "Why are you so difficult, Ever? The risks you've taken during this investigation alone…"
"Have been successful," my clipped response cut him off. "You invited me to join this job, knowing full well how I conduct myself. I've made my decisions based on the same patterns of thought as yourself. I may not be your equal, L, but I'm not an amateur. Don't tell me all this talk of friendship is bringing out your sentimental side." The words came out like viper's venom, and I watched as the other detective's eyes darkened further.
"You know it's not. Don't take it upon yourself to suggest that I've forgotten the principles we were raised on. People like us cannot have friends," he said it like a fact, as if he hadn't pondered the concept of friendship his entire life. Perhaps I had pushed too far. L's deep and vacant eyes were fixed on me with a heated glare, like coals in the fire, and I had almost forgotten a simple, central truth. He was still human. "The most you or I will ever get of a true friendship is the mere consideration of another person as a friend."
I broke eye contact, overwhelmed by the reminder that for all his stoic reasoning and his playful humor, L was only human. A human who had been deprived of such commodities as friendship and connection. "I don't want to talk about Wales," I said quietly, finally lifting a piece of cake to my mouth.
"I'm inclined to ask further," L replied, the heat of his gaze had gone, and he had returned to his usual level demeanor.
"I'd prefer if you don't. I'm entitled to my secrets just as you are."
"What makes you think I have secrets?"
We had fallen back into our casual repertoire smoothly, all tension and upset from just seconds ago completely forgotten. Yet, just below the surface, there was something more. It was as if a straw was breaking. Soon, everything would come toppling down for both of us, and the strange bond we shared would be something else entirely.
"The greatest detective in the world has to have secrets."
He hummed in a way that signalled no interest in what I had said. "You think I'm the greatest detective in the world?"
"That's a verified fact," I retorted.
"But you don't think of me as a man."
"I think of you as who you are," I replied, only somewhat surprised that L could have such a fragile sense of masculinity that my consideration of him could offend him even a little bit. That didn't seem right. No, it wasn't. L didn't care about social rules and concepts like gender roles or expectations. Yet, his mocking pout wasn't in place, and he spoke as if he was genuinely displeased with the idea.
"Do you think of Light Yagami as a man?"
Why was it that this question felt much like a loaded gun? L was looking at me again with some odd emotion flickering in and out of his blank gaze, as if he wasn't sure he wanted me to see it or not.
"He's a suspect," I replied simply.
"That's not an answer," L countered.
"Come on, L," I lowered my fork to the plate and turned to face him entirely, "Light's a suspect in the Kira case. You've known from the beginning what this whole case is to me. Next thing you know, you'll be asking me if I'm in love with him."
He didn't answer, so I picked up my half eaten slice of cake and placed it back in the fridge. The next thing I knew, L was standing toe to toe with me and my back was pressed against the cool steel of the refrigerator door. "Are you?" he asked, eyes holding my own gaze.
"Am I what?"
"Are you in love with Light Yagami?"
A/N... I'm sorry for the wait! I hope this chapter was enjoyable. I'm having a lot of fun kind of exploring Ever's new personality now that she knows what she is and has this new self-awareness. Let me know what you think!
