Last time on 10 Good Tips on Surviving a Horror Story...
Yoshi: ...Why are you staring at me like that?
Luigi: (frightened whisper) We're not staring at you...
Yoshi freezes, looks over his shoulder and screams as two murderous red eyes stare back into his...
Peach: ...Right. Anyway, how are we supposed to get in there?
Toadette: Ummmm... any ideas, Daisy?
Daisy: ...Hmmmm... use your head!
Toadette: What?... Crap. I don't like where this is going.
Peach: Ready, GO!
Peach and Daisy break down the door with Toadette's head.
Yoshi: It's the ghost! Run!
They try to escape, but the ghost appears in front of them, blocking their path.
Yoshi: Well, at least it doesn't have a-
The ghost pulls out, a big, blood-stained chainsaw and revs it menacingly.
Yoshi and Toadette: Oh snap.
Mario and Luigi wandered the scary hallway for a long while, jumping at every little noise they heard. Suddenly, Luigi paused.
Luigi: Do you hear a chainsaw?
Mario: Ummmm... no. It must be your imagination.
Luigi: I could have sworn... oh well.
At the end of the hallway, they find a staircase leading to a lower level of the house.
Mario: You think they might be in the basement?
Tip #7: NEVER go into the basement if you value your life.
Luigi: (nervous laugh) Um, no! Why would they be? Why don't we go check the... umm... kitchen-
Mario grabs him by the shirt and painfully drags him down the stairs to the basement. They find a big, pitch black room.
Mario: Ok... give me the flashlight.
Luigi: F-Flashlight? I-I thought you had it...
Mario: No, I gave it to you.
Luigi: Ummm... let's just find a light switch... wait. Did you hear something?
Mario: It sounded like a scream! Come on, let's go back upstairs!
Luigi gives a sigh of relief.
Luigi: Wait... weren't there stairs here before?
Mario: You're sure they were right here?
Luigi: Uh huh... and now they're gone!
There is a heavy silence as they wonder what happened to the stairs... and when the silence is broken by maniacal laughter from behind them, they realize that they will be lucky to leave the basement alive...
Peach and Daisy meet outside the bedroom.
Peach: Have you seen Toadette? She should have been here a while ago...
Daisy: Let's go look for her.
Peach and Daisy start on their way to the dining room when they hear an odd clicking sound...
Peach: What was tha-
They both scream as they fall through a trap door into an underground lake!
The Readers: Wait, wait, wait- why is there an underground lake? Where did this come from?
Staple Sauce: Well, I thought that would make it more interesting. I mean, isn't there water in almost every-
Peach and Daisy: GET ON WITH IT!
Daisy: It's our story!
Staple Sauce: No, actually, it's my story... and I'm deciding what happens to all of you...
Staple Sauce laughs maniacally.
Daisy: Ok... so we're stuck in some stupid hanted mansion running for our lives because of some weird kid's twisted imagination!
Staple Sauce: ...Yep. That's pretty much it. In fact, I could kill you off any time I wanted.
Suddenly, an evil cursed pirahna of DOOM comes and bites Daisy's head off!
Just kidding.
Daisy: GOD! DON'T DO THAT!
Everyone: GET ON WITH IT!
Daisy and Staple Sauce: ...Fine.
Peach: Where the crap are we?
Daisy: I don't know. Maybe some kind of underground lake...
Staple Sauce: (sarcastically) Good job, Captain Obvious!
Readers: SHUT UP!
Peach: Well, let's swim ashore. We need to figure out how to find the other guys and get out of here.
After swimming for a while, they find Bowser Jr. sitting on the bank!
Bowser Jr.: Sure took you long enough to find me! What have you been doing? Besides breaking the fourth wall...
Peach: Well, what happened to you once you disappeared?
Bowser Jr.: Well... it's a long story...
Staple Sauce: This next part is not happening right this second. It happened during this chapter. By the end of the chapter, we'll be all caught up. Start flashback!
The ghost pulls out, a big, blood-stained chainsaw and revs it menacingly.
Yoshi and Toadette: Oh snap.
Yoshi: What now? How are we supposed to not get chainsawed by this thing?
Toadette: ...I know!
Toadette whips out 2 cans of Ghost-Away Spray (TM) and tosses one to Yoshi.
Toadette: With this!
She sprays the ghost with it. It screams and backs away, dropping the chainsaw.
Yoshi figures it out and they keep spraying the ghost. Soon, just as it looks like the ghost is almost dead, they both run out.
Toadette: We need another plan!
Yoshi: Plan? More like a miracle!
Suddenly, a large metal bar falls and hits the ghost on the head. It falls to the ground.
Yoshi: (looks up) Thanks.
Yoshi: ... D-Do you think it's dead?
Tip #8: Never check to see if the ghost is really dead. If you do, it will always come back.
Yoshi and Toadette cautiously walk over and stare at it. Suddenly, it wakes up and grins evilly!
Yoshi: ...Probably shouldn't have done that...
The ghost cuts a rope leading to the ceiling. Yoshi and Toadette look up just in time to see a chandelier falling towards them...
Staple Sauce: Another cliffhanger!
Will Yoshi and Toadette get crushed by the chandelier? Who or what is in the basement with Mario and Luigi? Where has Bowser Jr. been? Find out in the next chapter (or so)!
To Be Continued...
