In her heart she bore hope in a small flicker,
As time went by the flame got weaker,
She began to ask the gods for a favor,
Give her something — give her a savior.
Sasuke still had his arm wrapped around her shoulders. The back of her hand was now threatening to scratch her eyelids, but the barrier made from his muscles forbid her to do so.
It was not quite normal for her to wake up earlier than him, but the close contact was not foreign enough as her husband would do these simple actions almost every day. So Hinata started to ask herself why she was the first to open her eyes this time.
The night before that, she slept early and she had not done much of her training in their backyard — so she obviously was not tired. Yet there was this alarming feeling she could not shake.
For some unknown reasons, she was feeling anxious.
As softly as she could, Hinata slowly unwrapped Sasuke's arms around her shoulders. When she had succeeded, Hinata slowly reached for her pillow and put it in Sasuke's grasp.
It was an odd sight. Seeing Sasuke hugging one of the pillows. But it was her doing.
She exited the room and went her way towards the kitchen. It wouldn't be long after Sasuke wakes up so Hinata started preparing their breakfast.
Just as she predicted, Sasuke woke up not long after she had finished their breakfast. When he came downstairs to meet with her, Hinata received a nod from him.
"Good morning," Hinata greeted softly, earning another nod from her husband.
As they were beginning to eat in silence, there was a knock on the door. Trying to get to her feet to go to the door, Sasuke grunted.
"I'll do it," announced her husband before drifting off to see who the person was.
Whilst Hinata could still not shake the anxious feeling, she slowly ate her breakfast. It was not long before Sasuke came back.
"Who was it?" asked Hinata softly before sipping in her tea.
"ANBU," answered Sasuke. "Kakashi calls."
The lack of respect towards his former teacher and the present hokage almost made Hinata flinch. It was not the first time her husband called the hokage by his name, but it's still not something she could find normal.
"When will you be leaving?"
"Later."
In their almost two months together as married couple, Hinata would often find herself alone in their house. Not that she was complaining about it, it was also her fault she never had asked Sasuke if she could go out.
And maybe she liked it this way.
Training in their backyard even though it's not much to be called a training. Throwing kunais to improve her aim. And sometimes even practicing her chakra flow in the pond.
It was a quiet life.
Perhaps the only thing she could not accept was the fact that she was beginning to neglect her kunoichi duties. Given the fact that Hinata was proposed a break from her work with the help of her father and the Hokage's choice. Though it was infuriating that she does not find it alarming.
When Sasuke was about to leave, Hinata stood by the doorway with her husband's cloak. As the raven haired man approached her, he looked at her with an annoyed look. She knew why: Hinata had never done anything like it before.
The glare he gave her was almost too casual for her to even overthink about.
"Stay safe," the words had left her lips as soon as she helped him put his cloak.
He did not even bother to reply and went on his way. There would times when he ignored her and she could not help but feel anxious. Thankfully though, the times when she would not choose to care was higher than the other choice.
At some point, Hinata feared for her own sake. Like a mantra, she would repeat, 'You chose this,' over and over again until her brain gets tired. And she would remember.
It was nearing lunch when Sasuke came back. Upon entering the house, Hinata couldn't help but notice the unusual aura he brought.
There was nothing wrong in his face. It still remained as stoic as ever, yet behind his almost blank eyes were something Hinata had never seen before.
"What's wrong?" asked Hinata softly.
She stood up from her seat and noticed how Sasuke still had his cloak on. For several moments, she contemplated if she would help him with his cloak but then she realized Sasuke was not going to take it off anytime soon.
"Do you have some clothes left in the Hyuga compound?" he asked, standing straighter than usual.
"I do." With a nod, she completed, "Yukatas and kimonos, but not much of my regular shirts."
"Hn," Sasuke said with a nod. "Pack a few clothes, we're leaving."
"B-but –"
"Don't ask," he ordered, cutting her off. He turned his back on her and rushed towards their bedroom.
As much as Hinata wanted to know more as to why Sasuke was acting stranger than usual, she decided not to ask anymore. The curiosity was bubbling inside of her but she couldn't do anything about it.
When she slid the door open, Hinata saw Sasuke's clothes scattered 'round the floor. Sasuke was frantically pulling shirts and whatnot into his rucksack.
"Do you want me to help you?" she offered, but all she ever received was a light shrug.
"Pack the necessities," he ordered in which Hinata complied. When she had put some of his hygienic tools in his rucksack, he looked at her. "Change now."
And so she did. The next thing she knew, she already had her satchel with several clothes with the Uchiha crest and some of her personal things. When she saw how Sasuke put his scrolls in his belt, her eyes widened in shock.
Why would he need scrolls?
As if seeing the confusion in her face, Sasuke grunted, capturing her attention.
"I'll drop you off to the Hyuga compound," he said, still not quite answering Hinata's questions.
The emotions were too overwhelming. Her unspoken questions were still not answered, even by the clues her husband had showed her. Yet, it was hard to guess when you cannot even understand what the situation is really all about.
When he secured their house, Hinata was by the gates of their home. Without even activating her kekkei genkai, she already knew how people passing by were looking at her. In the morrow — even if she did not know about it at first — there would be a new set of rumors once more.
Finally, Sasuke showed up with his rucksack around his shoulder. He offered to take Hinata's satchel but Hinata only shook her head with a smile.
Without speaking out his plans, Sasuke wrapped his arm around her shoulder — like he usually did — and started walking. This action made Hinata walk with a small blush in her cheeks.
And even with the almost comforting feeling, Hinata still feels the anxiety inside of her.
The walk towards the Hyuga compound was a long one, but this time, it was different. And Hinata, for a ninja, was a slow walker, yet today, she was almost running just because Sasuke was close to dragging her. Neither Sasuke walks fast, but then he seemed like he was rushing so she complied with the pace of his speed.
As she could slowly see the all-too-familiar posts, Hinata immediately put her hand around Sasuke's waist to squeeze it. It captured his attention — or at least she thought so — as he turned to share a small glimpse at her.
"Are we staying at the compound?" she asked and almost gagged herself with stupidity.
How could she ask that? But then, she didn't really know the answer and it seemed fitting at the moment. It somehow explained something.
"No, we aren't," answered Sasuke. There was a small pause. "But you will."
"I will?" asked Hinata in bewilderment. Her eyes widened and she stopped walking. Sasuke's hand slowly fell from her shoulder as she turned to look at him. "But wh-what about you?"
"I'll explain later," Sasuke promised, putting his arm around her shoulder once more before proceeding to walk again. When they were basically at the main entrance of the Hyuga compound, he spoke, "I am needed in a mission."
And that had explained a lot. Why he needed the scrolls, why he was acting unusual, or why he had the strange aura.
It was not the first time Sasuke went away for a mission. Though it cannot be denied that her husband would come back in a short matter of time. If Hinata did not know any better, she'd have guessed that most of his missions were lowly ranked or just fairly easy for him.
But then, her husband was a really good ninja. Sure, he was once a traitor to the village, but his skills were excellent. Almost too excellent, she could add.
"What's wrong with our home?" As soon as the words left her lips, she immediately regretted it. The curiosity may have built up inside of her, but she knew she needn't to ask. "I mean, I could stay there."
"I've already talked to your father," Sasuke told her, giving her a peripheral glance before entering the compound completely. "He agreed and I couldn't see why not."
They were greeted by servants who took their bags, but Sasuke refused to let go of his rucksack. Once they had entered the main house, Hinata looked from the ground to greet her father.
The man looked tired. His brown hair already had a few grey streaks into it — it was almost unnoticeable, but even without using the byakugan, Hinata's eyesight was enhanced than most. The wrinkles in his forehead deepened and there a few addition. The bags under his eyes were dark and a sign that he haven't had not much sleep.
All Hinata could do was stare at her own father with worry. Her knitted eyebrows were already an indication of that.
If there was one thing to describe the clan head at the moment, the right words would be: it was as if the whole world were at his shoulders.
"Otou-san," she said, bowing her head as a curtsey.
"Hinata, Uchiha-san," her father greeted back. "Have a seat."
The both of them inquired without preamble. When Hinata glimpsed at Sasuke, she immediately noticed that it was like he needed to say something. So as her father poured out their tea, Hinata tried to find the proper time to speak up.
"Otou-san, I am afraid my husband would be on his way to a mission. We may cause delay." The words left her system as soon as she found the right timing. Turning to look at her husband, she was not disappointed to see Sasuke nodding lightly. "I have been told that it has already been mentioned."
"Ah yes," Hiashi agreed as if he finally remembered something. Another odd thing since Hiashi rarely forgets anything. "I have a lot in mind, I have forgotten. Well then, you may have your leave any time you want. I can assure you that my daughter would be safe within these walls."
"I understand, Hyuga-sama," Sasuke spoke. Standing up, he asked, "May I borrow your daughter for a few moments before I depart?"
Eyes widening, Hinata immediately shifted her gaze to the ground. That was. . .surprising.
"If you must," the clan head said with a wave of dismissal. The sigh of the Hyuga did not come unnoticed.
With the permission, Sasuke took Hinata's arm before leaving the main house. As they were in a quiet area, Sasuke let out a breath. Frustration? Was it?
Hinata could do nothing as she watched her husband stand silently before her. It was an awkward scene, yet it was too normal to be given acknowledgement.
"I will be on my way to a mission," he announced. "I cannot tell you much about it. It is confidential, yet I know that you deserve to know."
'Deserve to know what?' she wanted to ask but kept her mouth shut. There was something about the way Sasuke spoke that she could not put a finger on. It was hard enough for her to read her husband before because he lacked emotions, and now that he's showing more emotions, Hinata found it harder.
"I will be with a representative from the Inuzuka clan and Sakura," Sasuke added. "They've already sent different teams before but each one were instructed to go back after three days or so, no matter what. Not one of the teams had succeeded."
"It must be dangerous," Hinata said with much worry lingering in her tone.
"Probably," agreed Sasuke with a grunt. This startled Hinata, for she never saw it coming. "Yet we were told that we must complete the mission."
At first, Hinata tried her best to understand what Sasuke had meant. When it dawned on her, she could not help but worry more about Sasuke. He was still her husband, after all.
As Hinata put it all one by one, she finally found out what Sasuke's mission would be. It was a rescuing type. They were rescuing someone — or if not, then it would probably be rescuing a team. After all, they would need someone from Kiba's clan. And then they would need Sakura.
They also needed a fighter.
"I understand," said Hinata softly, earning a small 'hn' from Sasuke. "Will you be alright?"
The man in front of her visibly stiffened. And Hinata could only watch in both bewilderment and surprise as his body was speaking volumes. Though Hinata still did not know why. Was it because of the mission or was there something else?
"I would be," Sasuke said.
That moment, Hinata already figured that there was something behind those words. There was something he was not telling her. And though she wanted to push him out of it, it was never something that she could do.
"And I will be staying here until you come back, I presume?" asked Hinata. If she were being honest, she was not too happy about the idea.
Sure, there was Hanabi to keep her company and humor her from time to time. Or there would be the kids from their clan who were jolly. And then there would be her father whom she missed.
But there was something in it that Hinata did not find too exciting.
"Yes." With a nod, he continued. "You'll stay here until I come back. You can check on the house, but do not sleep there or stay out before dark."
She nodded her head to indicate that she understood. Apart from the fact that the question about him forbidding her to stay out at night is still unanswered, there was still a lot of things unspoken. But like the usual deliberated girl she was, she never bothered to speak up.
"Can I go out to see my friends?" she asked when Sasuke was fixing his belt. At this, Sasuke looked up to her with his hands still in his belt. Panicking slightly, Hinata continued, "I m-mean it's okay i-if I d—"
"I never said no, did I?" asked Sasuke before putting his attention back to his belt. With this, Hinata let out a sigh of relief and gratitude. "You know your limitations, you can protect yourself. Do what you intend to do."
"Thank you," she said sincerely, earning the usal 'hn' from her husband. With this, she decided to push her luck. "Am I allowed to go out on missions from now on?"
Sasuke stopped fixing the position of the katana in his belt at the question. Hinata's heart started to beat wildly. So she questioned herself. Why did she ever push her luck?
"I never said you couldn't," Sasuke said, furrowing his eyebrows at her.
Hinata did not know why, but she was so relieved to hear those words from Sasuke. So he was not forbidding her at all. It was just all an assumption made by her.
When had she started jumping onto conclusions?
But then, the reply Sasuke gave was shocking. At least she had expected something like: You are annoying from him, but he did not. It was the usual line he would give to the girls fawning over him back in the day. Maybe the wife did not know the husband much as his friends did, but she knew little bits of him from the academy.
"Th-thank you," Hinata said with a bright smile before putting her eyes back at the ground. "That makes me really. . .happy."
Sasuke did not reply, and Hinata was thankful for that.
When Hinata noticed how Sasuke was done with everything. She glanced back at the main house and saw how her father was waiting for them to come back.
After a few seconds or so, Sasuke started walking towards the clan head. It was only when Sasuke was in a distance from the wife when she started walking. When they reached her father, Sasuke bowed slightly.
"I have decided to take on my leave," Sasuke said after his bow. "Hopefully, my mission would go well."
Hinata only noticed now how Sasuke would speak with formality. Maybe they hadn't reached the standards of her former community, but it was enough to please a respectable clan. And then she remembered: Sasuke was from a respectable clan too.
He had been young when his entire clan were killed, so maybe the lessons he had received about formalities when he was a child were only a few. But then, he knew his words enough.
"I do hope the same," Hiashi stated. "Again, Hinata would be safe in these walls."
"I would never doubt it," Sasuke said.
Hanabi's words rung out in her mind. "Your husband's a real charmer." And maybe he really was.
"I'll be leaving now," said Sasuke, earning a nod from both Hiashi and Hinata. "Take care."
"Be careful to you, too," Hinata declared with a small smile.
With a last glance he shared with Hinata, Sasuke flickered off. All Hinata could do was stare as his figure disappeared.
Hiashi cleared his throat once Sasuke was gone. At this, Hinata turned around. With a smile, she bowed to her father even though she had done it a few minutes ago.
"I take it that your husband would be coming home. . .indefinitely?" asked Hiashi, in which Hinata nodded as a response. "Then make yourself at home. It is still your home."
Hinata took little of her own time to study her father. There was something in his eyes that was unsettling. And she knew she would know later, or if not, she could guess. Aside from that, her father was partially shaking.
There was something wrong.
"Thank you, otou-san," Hinata said, bowing. "Where would I settle when the night comes, otou-san?"
"The servants had prepared your old room for you. The interior is still exactly how you left it, if not for the slight changes over the months you have been gone." Hiashi cleared his throat. "Therefore you would spend your settlement in there. However. . ."
The man before her trailed off, but Hinata could not bring herself to permit what he ought to say. There was something he was not telling her. The clan head was not being himself.
Saving the fact that he was still as formal as ever, or maybe Hiashi still had his stoic mask. . .it was pretty obvious to those who bothered to look that the man was anxious about something.
He never fretted. The clan head was always calm. And if he were angry, he could be one of the feared shinobis. But now, Hiashi was basically shaking.
"Take your rest now," Hiashi ordered which Hinata gladly obliged.
The next thing she knew, she was once again in her old room where she had spent almost the half of her life. There weren't much changes and she was thankful for that.
In a short while, Hinata found herself falling asleep. When one of her former handmaidens had knocked on the door, Hinata began to stir awake. Opening her eyes, the room was almost foreign for her.
Goodness how she had gotten accustomed to the house she shared with Sasuke.
The anxious feeling she felt in the morning was still lingering inside of her. And it felt like it would not go away anytime soon.
"You may enter," she said in a sleepy voice before sitting up straight from her bed.
"Oh I'm sorry to wake y—"
"It's okay, it's okay," she said, cutting the handmaiden's voice off. "What can I do for you?"
Hinata had never liked it when there were servants doing her supposed job for her. The views hadn't changed from a young age, and she was very thankful for that. But now that she was awakened from her sleep, Hinata found herself fine with the situation.
"Oh, nothing, Uchiha-sama," called the servant. At this, Hinata's eyes widened. It was the first time someone called her that. The maiden seemed oblivious to it as she still held her bow. "I was just tasked to clean your room."
"Uhm, it's okay?" Hinata said in a questioning matter. "I can clean it."
"No, please Uchiha-sama, don't," the handmaiden pleaded, her pupil-less lavender eyes staring directly onto Hinata's. "It's my duty."
Hinata wanted more sleep and she did not know why she was feeling tired. Ever since this morning, she could just not shake the feeling off her. Sleep was the only escape.
"I insist," Hinata replied, too tired to even put up an argument. "Clean Hanabi-chan's room if you must. I know she has a rather messy bedroom."
Silence engulfed in the room and Hinata could only look at the handmaiden with much confusion. The girl did not seem to know what she would say. There was something bothering the girl and it was obvious.
"But Uchiha-sama. . ." started the maiden. The way the girl said it sent shivers down Hinata's spine. "I have already cleaned Hanabi-sama's room for the day."
"Oh thank you for that," Hinata said with a small smile but only received an uncertain look from the girl. Too uncertain that there was both unbelief and alarm in her eyes. "Can I ask where Hanabi-chan is?"
"Uchiha-sama?" called the girl. The disbelief in her eyes only deepened.
"Is there something wrong?" asked Hinata, getting up to her feet from her bed and started walking on her way towards the shy handmaiden. Once she was from a distance from the maiden, Hinata continued, "Please tell me."
"Uchiha-sama, please tell me you know," pleaded the girl, bowing. "Hanabi-sama is missing. . .for three weeks now."
The world was suddenly silenced for a whole new minute. Her head started spinning, her vision became blurry, and she found herself grasping for air. It was all-too-familiar for her.
The next thing she remembered was everything fading into the darkness.
When she woke up, there were several handmaidens around her. Most of them were fanning her. The others were putting dry towels in some parts of her body.
Motioning that she got it all, she quickly dismissed them all without being completely rude.
And so, she found herself storming out of her room and into her father's study. Once she arrived there, all she could so was stare at her father. The emotions were bubbling up inside of her.
"You didn't even tell me. . ." trailing off, Hinata bit her lip. "I'm still a Hyuga, otou-san. I may be an Uchiha now, but only by marriage. I had every rights to know."
At the moment, it did not really matter if she was acting impolite towards her father. They were still family, so the feeling of betrayal couldn't be said as uncalled for. And she knew to herself that she had never been this angry and helpless before.
Although the Hyuga clan head's face was as stoic as ever, there were small bits of emotions that flickered in his features.
"I did not want to worry you," Hiashi answered the unspoken question his daughter could not ask.
"I deserved to know." The statement came out venomous, with its spiteful tone and its demanding essence. It hadn't been on purpose, yet the fact seemed absent as it was too unnoticeable. "How long?"
"You do," agreed Hiashi with her first statement, slowly lowering his pupil-less eyes as if he was sorry for his wrong decisions. "Three weeks now."
The vulnerable look he gave was enough for Hinata's heart to clench. On rare occasions, she would she see her too proud father to drop his walls down and show his true colors, and the daughter believed it was happening right now. But now, there was anger in her chest. Even if she felt sorry for making her father feel this way, Hinata's unnerving feeling threw it all away.
"If that's so, why didn't you tell me?" asked Hinata, leaving the word otou-san out of the sentence. The lack of respect was maybe too much, but she could not bring herself to feel sorry about it. "Hanabi is my sister."
Hinata understoo well that the mission is confidential. Not many people knew of it maybe. If so, even if Hinata almost never left her house, she would probably know. At least that's what she thought.
"And she is my daughter," Hiashi stated, nodding lightly to meet her eyes ones more. "So are you."
"I am."
For some reasons she could not even explain to herself or just be a justification, Hinata stood up from her chair and began to walk away without dismissing herself. There would be no point of asking about Hanabi. Her father would not even say why he did not tell her Hanabi was missing.
The betrayal that came upon it almost made Hinata grimace. But she kept her face blank. Her face was emotionless as she started to walk away towards her old room, but inside, Hinata wanted to cry or maybe look angry as she knew it would do something somehow.
When Hinata finally stepped foot in her room, all she could do was sigh. It was too pointless to cry.
Night came and she barely had dinner. The maids had left her food, but Hinata did not touch one bit of them. It was one of those days when she just wanted to isolate herself from the rest of the world.
Even her old room reminded her too much of Hanabi. No, Hanabi was not dead, and even if she were, Hinata knew to herself she would not believe it. She could not lose her sister. There was no way any of those would be happening.
She already lost too much.
At a young age, Hinata lost her mother. Back then, she haven't really understood life. But when they held the funeral, in her small mind, she knew to herself that she just lost a big part of her.
When she lost Neji — even when she almost had Naruto those days — Hinata could not bring herself to be happy for quite a while. There was a piece of life from Hinata that Neji took with him.
Hinata lost a lot of people in the war. They all took small pieces of her soul to where they are now.
And now Hanabi is missing. . .for almost three weeks.
Maybe it was inevitable for them nins to disappear because of missions — their life is indeed dangerously close to edge of cliff. And perhaps even death was almost too normalized for shinobis and kunoichis. Even if this is the case, Hinata could not accept the fact that something wrong had happened to her sister.
"Why Hanabi?" the words had escaped her lips before she even thought of it.
It was the first phrase she had managed to say after her talk with her father. It was meant to be just a thought. A thought to ask the gods. But now it seemed like she was questioning them.
Closing her eyes, Hinata recalled the last time she had spoken with her sister. Be careful. Two words, but if only Hanabi had obliged. . .Hinata hoped she did.
Neither was she the type to be optimistic, nor pessimistic. So when she tries to cheer herself up, she fails miserably at it. And when Hinata decides to blame herself for certain things, she finds herself denying it all.
It was always something in between.
And she needed to vent.
The only way she could do that was to put herself to sleep. So she tried and found herself squirming at the loss of physical contact.
It wasn't every night Sasuke was home and it wasn't every night Hinata looks for something absent. The only thing that makes her think about her husband was the fact that he was, too, on a mission.
Then the arguments started pushing their way out of the wrinkles of her brain. Sasuke is strong, he would not get hurt, but even if he did, it would still be minor injuries. Sasuke is brave, he could do things in no time. Sasuke can defend himself.
But even if these three points and arguments were reassuring, the facts that these arguments had their squash and rebuttal made it much worse. Hanabi was strong too, but where was she now? Hanabi was brave, but where was she? Hanabi could defend herself, but why?
So she prayed. Even with her back on her bed, she prayed. In her thoughts, she prayed. Even those gods that she did not believe, she prayed. That both Hanabi and Sasuke would come home, safe.
Come morning, everything will be alright, Hinata told herself. Though her mind had been cynical this past few hours, still she hoped. And deep in her heart, there was still the small flicker of hope.
There was nothing that she could do. Aside from staring at the ceiling and trying to assure herself about Hanabi's safety, there would be nothing else.
It was nearing midnight and still, she could not bring herself to sleep. If it were another day, she would drink tea to calm her senses and try to sleep, but she just wasn't in the mood.
Finally deciding on something she would have never agreed to earlier, she put on a new set of robes before heading towards her father's office. Knowing Hiashi, he still would not exit his office if there was something in his mind.
Slowly but without hesitation, Hinata knocked on the door.
"Enter, Hinata," her father had said behind the closed door. She quickly obliged, only to see her father with his byakugan activated. As if answering her unspoken question, Hiashi spoke, "I am hoping."
The words came out unfinished, yet the thought was there. I am hoping to see your sister enter the gates.
"Come morning, you'll run out of chakra," said Hinata, not even bothering to choose her words wisely. Closing the door behind her, Hinata sighed. "I couldn't sleep."
"I haven't slept for days," Hiashi said, still not deactivating his kekkei genkai. The clan head was basically not looking at anything, but he was searching. "I couldn't bring myself to sleep."
Hinata had not thought much about her father. It almost hurt her how her father sounded very casual about it, yet she knew he was hurting — it was behind his words. Otherwise, he would sleep and stop searching for Hanabi.
The Hyuga heiress had been gone for three weeks. And the father knew of this ever since the very first day they had lost her team's tracks. Whilst Hinata felt too betrayed about the fact they hadn't told her and couldn't help but be mad about it, Hiashi was worrying about his daughter.
"I apologize," Hinata said softly, bringing herself to bow. She was not a proud woman, and she never had been one. It was only appropriate for her to do so. "I apologize for my behavior. . .for not hearing you out and walking out on you. I apo—"
"Stop," his father ordered, his voice thick with emotions she could not put a finger on. It was enough to make her straighten her back from bowing. It was when she noticed that his eyes were back to normal. "You have nothing to apologize. I am not tripping your guilt in any way possible, but I should be the one to apologize."
When her father bowed, her heart clenched. It was too sincere. The man never bowed, and when he did, it would be because of deep reasons. But now, it was as if the winds of Konoha changed.
"Please otou-san, stop that," Hinata begged, panicking as her voice raised.
"No," Hiashi said, his voice soft but still kept its authority. "I never wanted you to worry, and I thought it was the right thing to do."
"Please otou-san, get up on your knees!" Hinata begged once more, rushing to her father's side to pull him.
Hiashi was stubborn, much as she was and the rest of the Hyuga clan. Never had she imagined that there would come a time when she would be the one to frantically pull her father from the grounds. Growing up in their community, it was almost too normal for her to be pulled in that way — but not always in the same circumstances.
And when she succeeded, Hinata put her hands in her father's cheeks.
"Please otou-san," Hinata begged. "Never do that again. Especially because of me."
The exasperated sigh that the clan head gave was enough indication that he understood. He was a proud one, yet at the moment, he did not seem too proud nor humble. With this, Hinata backed off and went towards to where she previously stood.
"Thank you," said Hinata softly with such sincerity.
A long deafening silence engulfed.
From time to time, the clan head would activate his byakugan but would deactivate it when he could not find anything. His byakugan was beyond imagination, as there were different lores and beliefs on how far it could go and how many people he could sense in just a matter of seconds. Yet Hinata still did not know if those were true as she never bothered to ask her father about it.
"The last time she was here, she asked if she could visit you."
The revelation hurt Hinata in a way she could not explain.
"She could visit me whenever she wants to." A sigh escaped her lips. "But I understand."
"She understood," Hiashi stated, nodding slightly. "Hanabi may not be too understanding nor empathetic, but she understood."
"It was never my intention to make those who are around me uncomfortable. Uncomfortable in a way that they thought they could not see me."
"Yes, there are rumors," Hiashi agreed. "You're not only talking about Hanabi, I presume?"
"It's not wise to talk about it," Hinata said softly. "It's not wise, knowing that we have a bigger problem in our shoulders."
"Are you telling me that it is unwise to ask about my daughter's life?" questioned Hiashi with his glare deepening. At this, Hinata's eyes widened. "Tell more. I need to take my mind off things."
Maybe it would be nice to comply. His father had probably been distracted for three whole weeks, and Hinata not being there made her guilty.
"What would you like to know?"
"How is your marriage with Uchiha Sasuke?" asked Hiashi, sipping on his tea.
"I'm still adjusting up to now," said Hinata with a sly smile. "We are fine."
And then they talked about the wedded life of the Uchiha. There was not much to say, but Hinata figured that there would be no reason for her to be closed minded about it.
After all, if there was someone whom she know would remind oneself that the marriage between her and Sasuke is arranged, it would be Hiashi.
"Then it must be going well. Hanabi did not have the chance to tell me what has happened in your home. May I know of it?"
The mention of her sister reminded Hinata of her gloom and anxiety. In the talk she had with her father about her and Sasuke, the thought about Hanabi would come rushing in. And it did hurt, but it was a way for her to entertain her father who had been in the same misery with her — but he had been in it for long.
"Sasuke was the one who entertained her. She was absolutely ecstatic that he offered her tea," the daughter replied with a small sad smile. "And then Hanabi-chan had left us fishes."
"Ah right. The fishes. She won them from a random wanderer who stopped by our front gate," told Hiashi with an almost smile. "Your little sister had even told me she would shoo the man off. But she came back with several bags of fishes."
Aside from the fact that her father wasn't being complete formal, there was amusement in his tone. Yet no one can hide the fact that the both of them
"Did she joke her way into it?" asked Hinata with a smile, even though the sadness was still lingering in her tone.
"She did not. Instead, she told me the truth with all honesty," answered the father. "I remember her pointing out the way my eyebrows twitched. And as much as I wanted to have her punishment for the disrespect, Hanabi told me about going to the mission."
"Yes, it was voluntary, was it not?" she asked. Without an answer, Hinata continued, "I asked her about it. I even told her to tell me more about it when she comes back. . ."
Hinata trailed off, biting her lip. Looking down, she felt hot tears coming out from the corner of her eyes. She swiftly wiped it all even if she knew her father had known of her tears.
"I can never be too optimistic about this, but I hope she would," said Hiashi honestly. "Not only because she is the future of our clan, but she is my daughter."
From her eyes on the ground, Hinata slowly looked up. The stain of her tears were still there. But then, even if she was not looking at the mirror, she knew how she looked.
Enraged: that was one word for it.
"Isn't being your daughter supposed to be the first reason why?" asked Hinata, unknowingly straightening her back. "I get the fact that you love us even if you don't openly tell us, but I still hope that I would sense it from you, otou-san."
The clan head visibly stiffened at the sudden outburst. Even the speaker herself was shocked at how she reacted. Never had she imagined she would say these things to her father before. Then again, even earlier, she had never expected she would say those words.
The room suddenly felt cold. It was as if the atmosphere was interrupted by an unseen flurry. With the silence, Hinata could hear the blood pumping in her ears.
"Because, Hinata," Hiashi started. "If Hanabi never comes ba–"
"How could you say that?" blurted Hinata, cutting her father off. She stood up and continued, "You can't say that! Take it back! Please!"
Her own pleas made her wince.
"Do not blind yourself, Hinata." The stern voice of her father only added fuel to the fire. "The possibilities are endless. . .I still hope for the very best, yet I have already had my choices sorted out if ever the unfortunate circumstances come."
"I do not know if I understand," Hinata said, her eyebrows furrowing. And then again, the hot tears came rushing out of her eyes. Her temple hurt too much. "I don't even know if I want to understand."
"It is why I never told you in the first place," said Hiashi. "You will never try to know the reasons why."
"I never want to lose hope."
"Hope is not something I could lose. If I could, then maybe I had lost it a long time ago," Hiashi said, probably pertaining to the fact that he had lost her wife — Hinata's mother. "Losing hope is out of the choices, however, with hope comes expectations. As I am still expecting that Hanabi would come back, I also know of the possibility that she would never."
At this, Hinata dropped back to her seat again. There was no way her father was considering that Hanabi might be gone. There was no way.
Hinata knew about love — not every aspect of it, but she knew about love. From a young age, she figured her father would not show his love the way other fathers would. She learned it in one of the hardest ways one possibly could. But. . .this situation was making her forget about her thoughts of Hiashi's uncommon affection towards his daughters.
"If that happens, you'll be the clan heiress again," said Hiashi, taking Hinata's attention back to him. "You will need to change your name back into Hyuga."
"Stop," Hinata said sternly, eyeing her father with much force. "Hanabi is coming back. She is. She would. She w—"
"Stop being blinded!" Hiashi whispered sternly, practically banging his hands on his table with his head leaning towards her. "After all these years, your childishness is still there!"
"I'm not being childish!" With justification, Hinata continued, "I'm being hopeful. Otou-San, you have endured this long enough. I know it hurts. But I am not ready to hear your plans. . ."
"It's the future of our clan," Hiashi stated, his voice as stern as ever.
"I'm no longer a Hyuga."
It took her all courage to utter those words out, and she was not disappointed by how it turned out. Her voice did not crack, nor there was any hesitation in saying it. And Hinata almost had the satisfying feeling in the pit of her stomach until her father cleared out his throat.
"Only by marriage," Hiashi corrected "You said so earlier."
Hinata could almost close her eyes at her father's argument.
"Yes, but now, I have my own choices," she whispered, straightening her back to show that she was more than who she was back then.
It had only been quiet for a few seconds, but it felt like eternity for Hinata. She figured Hiashi also felt the same way. Hinata was never this stubborn to her father, but it was Hanabi they were talking about.
Hanabi. Her little sister. The future clan head. The heiress.
Hinata wanted to leave then. Talking to her father was pointless. She was wrong to talk to him, but she would never admit it out loud.
"Hinata, I'm not forcing you to do anything as of now," Hiashi said in a matter-of-factly. "I am merely stating facts that if ever something happens to your sister, the future of the clan would be uncertain. I am not hoping for it as I know Hanabi would do well in being clan head, though I consider the possibilities."
Hearing as there was this justifying point within her father's words, her gaze dropped back to the wooden floor. There was no point of building up her pride now. She started to understand.
"I'm sorry," apologized Hinata with much sincerity. "I thought you have accepted of. . .no. . .I mean I thought you have already made up your mind because Hanabi isn't here."
"I would never do that. Never as a father, nor a clan head," Hiashi stated, his statement bearing nothing but the truth. "I could never accept something that hasn't happened."
"Thank you," Hinata said without thinking. In addition, she continued, "But I'd rather not hear your plans."
"I do understand. But if I could, it would be much better if you hear me out." The Hyuga clan head cleared his throat. "I understand why you don't want to, but maybe it would be for the best."
Hinata only faced her father. Trying to hide her confusion as well as her curiosity, Hinata frowned.
"I highly doubt your husband would change his name into Hyuga — he's the last of the clan. So it would be just you who would change the name," Hiashi started. "Your children could be Hyuga or Uchiha, whatever your choice may be. We just need an heir for each of the clans, for I believe that Uchiha Sasuke would want to keep his bloodline alive."
At the mention of children, Hinata's mouth almost went agape. Her heart started beating wildly even if her father had not said anything that would make her heart speed up.
"And it is why I never told you about Hanabi," Hiashi continued. "Because I have come to the conclusion that you are expecting by now."
That was the last straw. Hinata's heart almost stopped with the statement. They haven't even tried for an heir. Which reminded her. . .why?
Pushing the thoughts aside, now's not the time, she told herself quietly.
"So with the prayer that Hanabi comes back safe and sound, I also hope for your husband's safe return," Hiashi started. "While I do not know much of the mission, I have been informed that the ninjas are having a hard time in accomplishing it."
At the mention of Sasuke, Hinata looked at her father once more. Her thin eyebrows slowly knitted. In her mind, Hinata tried to put two in two together, but couldn't. She could not quite understand.
"What about my husband?" asked Hinata, slowly rising from her feet.
"Hasn't he told you?" Hiashi asked, looking up to his daughter who stood before him. "It was their mission to retrieve Hanabi and their team."
And then it dawned on her. It has explained everything.
How we managed to say that she deserved to know. Why he looked frantic earlier. Why he acted the way he did. And of course, why his mission would need Sakura and a member from Kiba's clan. . .
They were rescuing Hanabi.
A/N: Due to some reviews, I have decided to use Japanese honorifics. I would be editing the first few chapters next time. If there are scenes when they would or would not acknowledge each other with the use of the honorifics, please do be reminded that most are very much intentional. Also, kindly point out if I used some wrongly? All the love guys.
This chapter was originally two, but I fused two chapters together. In addition: for those who have asked for Sasuke's POV, I cannot promise that you'll have one soon because I have already planned when it would show up. I hope you understand. But if you really want one, I can make some adjustments.
To the favourites, follows, and review: thank you ever so much!
Merry Christmas to all of you — believers or not, I hope you'll all be safe. Consider this chapter as an early celebration for Hinata's birthday.
Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine.
