a/n: I wrote this story just for one person. This goes out to my good friend Miss Lily who sometimes doesn't realize just how much her James loves her. Plus, she loves Death Cab. And this is inspired by it's lyrics. Hope you enjoy. Laura
James Potter laid there in bed, his head spinning with a million thoughts, each one popping up for a split second, only to be replaced by another one. He tried to sleep, but it was hard to find slumber at the moment.
He glanced over at his lovely wife laying there. She looked so lovely, so perfect. He couldn't comprehend why anyone would want to harm someone so talents and loving as her.
James gently ran a hand through her soft and silky red hair as he watched her sleep. Hopefully her sleep was a peaceful and restful one. She needed her rest; he had just found out that they were going to have a baby.
He couldn't help but smile to himself at that thought. He was now going to be a daddy. He couldn't believe how wonderful of a feeling it was to know that he was partially responsible for bringing life into the world. It was a rush, a surge, it was…amazing.
Of course, he went right back to frowning. His fears about something happening to Lily, and worse their baby, being hurt came back. James sighed and pulled her closer to him, even if she was asleep. He wouldn't know what to do if anything happened to her. He loved her more than anything.
Sure, he knew one day they would die, they couldn't live forever, but with the threats on them it just felt more real. It didn't feel like some far off thought you could easily push out of ones head. It was a real threat. In fact, both of them had come close to death already.
It's the scariest thing in the world to know that the person you love is close to death, and you feel so thankful, so lucky when they come out of those woods and you know you have at least one more day with them. The only thing that James did know for certain was that if they were going to take her, they were going to have to take him with her. He was going to be with her forever, even if that meant forever in death.
He took in a sharp intake of breath and then looked down at Lily sleeping. He couldn't fathom that he was having the thoughts that he was. He didn't want to think about death, today was supposed to be a happy day! Lily had told him they were having a baby. It was one of the most exciting moments in his life. He was going to be a dad!
James smiled and gently kissed Lily's forehead softly. He closed his eyes for a moment and tried to focus on all his happy memories. He thought back to being with all his friends in Hogwarts, Remus and Sirius and Peter. He missed being with them all the time, playing pranks and just having fun. He loved his years at Hogwarts, even if it meant going back to a time where Lily hated him. She never liked how he broke all the rules at school. But, James lived under Marauder philosophy; rules are made to be broken. He just guessed that he and Lily didn't share that philosophy. Hopefully it could be one to pass on to the baby later on.
James glanced back over at Lily again. He smiled once more and closed his eyes taking in another deep breath, trying to relax and calm down. After all, with glancing at the clock he found it to be almost two in the morning at this point, and he was rather tired, he just couldn't get to sleep.
He was too worried about all the bad things that could happen. James really didn't want to think about things such as losing Lily, or something bad happening with them and the baby, no he didn't want to think like that. But, at the time that's all that he seemed to be able to think about. James was only focused on thinking about all the things that he and Lily would miss, what they wouldn't get to see.
He let out a sigh and turned so that he was staring straight up at the ceiling. He closed his eyes for a moment, only for them to pop back open as he felt a hand touch his chest.
"James," a soft voice whispered. "Are you still awake?"
He looked over and saw Lily awake, and her vibrant green eyes full of concern. "Yeah, I am," he nodded as he lifted his hand to brush some of her hair out of her face and tuck it behind her ear.
"What are you still doing up?" she asked. She turned her head and looked at the nightstand. "James, its two a.m.! Is everything ok?" she asked turning back to him.
"Yeah, I just can't sleep. I keep thinking about so much," James said letting out another sigh. He didn't want to tell her what was on his mind and worry her, she had enough to deal with at the moment. "You just go to sleep," he said to her before kissing her lips softly.
Lily looked at him. "Alright," she said nodding as she moved closer to him. James wrapped his arms around her and held her close as she closed her eyes. He kissed her forehead gently, just as she fell back asleep.
He loved her, he loved her so much. And he knew that no matter what, he was going to be with her forever. And he realized that his vows, their wedding vows were wrong, because he wasn't even going to let death do them part. No, he was going to be with her forever. He would follow her into the dark.
