Act Two: Disillusionment—
He grabbed her arm.
"You don't have to leave."
There was an unreadable look from her as he said it.
Her stare was so powerful he craved to decipher the meaning.
Kathryn wanted to scream:
"Don't you realize the irony of your words?"
But she remained silent.
Instead she yanked her arm away from him but her feet don't touch the floor.
"We're just fucking."
A cold answer.
His expression was bitter and she congratulated herself for it.
Nobody thought he would last this long.
Sebastian Valmont and commitment can't be uttered in a single sentence without one finding the statement erroneous and preposterous in nature. Apropos that fact about him, it would then prove to be a bewildering phrase if I were to tell you that as of today, Sebastian Valmont and Annette Hargrove have been dating for four months.
Girls envied Annette. Guys scoffed at Sebastian. Romantics sighed at the way he looked intently at her while she spoke during their lunch hour. Pessimists, mostly his former conquests, rolled their eyes and predicted that in a week's time with the right slut, Valmont's pants would come down and another girl would replace Annette Hargrove. Kathryn Merteuil, on the other hand, defied any category but her reaction was duly noted.
She didn't care. She never wavered when he passed by her table while his hand held Annette's, the only reaction was the uncrossing of her legs and another tinkling laugh at something one of her many companions had said. Her boyfriend nibbled on her neck while the others showed their acceptance of the happy couple at their table. Even she looked pleased at Brandon David, but Sebastian didn't like the fact that the guy seemed too possessive of her. There was something steely and not at all trustworthy at the way the jock's jaw clenched when one of Kathryn's male companions ogled at her, his fingers were clenching and unclenching in an almost passive aggressive manner.
The sound of her laughter was low and amused; somewhere he knew she wasn't laughing at the joke but at the crowd and how it sucked up to her. Months ago he would have shared that private joke with her, now he was ostracized from the world nobody else had entered except for him. The voices became hushed when he'd passed by and he was certain that he caught the words 'pussywhipped' and 'waste'.
"Oh, leave my brother alone." She commented, brushing back her silky hair. "I'm sure there are other things better to talk about than his fall from grace."
Today was their fourth month and Annette looked especially pretty today, even opting to put a small amount of makeup that exuded her fresh faced good looks. Sebastian realized this and they were about to go to his car when Kathryn's words stopped him cold. It wasn't the insults or sneering that affected him after all, because he could care less about what the others thought. Her comment had a lilting, airy tone to it yet there was also something... Something he couldn't quite get but he knew there was something more to it that it seemed. It was only a few meters from her table and he turned his head to look at her.
She was looking at him again.
"Are you happy now?" she spoke. Her voice was strong and clear and directed to him.
His heart jumped in his throat, then suddenly Annette seemed wrong, the feeling of her hand in his seemed forced, too routine. Her pretty face didn't incite such new and profound feelings of affection as it had done before.
These are the symptoms of a dying relationship.
He needed to breathe. He needed to get out, to pry Kathryn's gaze off him because it suffocated him as much as Annette's wide smile and trusting body was doing. It was then that the muted sounds of the room's murmurs increased in volume and he was suddenly aware of everything.
"Sebastian?" Annette prodded gently and he looked at her blankly. Was she aware of what had happened inside of him? As Sebastian Valmont glanced back at his girlfriend, he wondered what had happened. The past months had flown by so quickly but why was it that now, time couldn't be fast enough?
"Annette." He began in a strangled voice, taking his hand from hers. Her crestfallen reaction made him feel guilty but he couldn't stand another moment of this. Still, he was concerned for the blonde and perhaps he owed it to her to try. This was just temporary; this was just what Kathryn does. Maybe if she wasn't in the same room he would return to normal and return to feeling for Annette what he did four months ago and the months in between.
"I'm sorry." He smiled and they left Manchester Prep.
For their fourth month, he took her to dinner at an expensive restaurant. The entire time she looked exuberant, her face glowing and smile brimming with happiness when she told him she loved him.
Sebastian remained almost silent, nodding and saying a word or two. He even squeezed her hand and complimented her on how she looked tonight, the realization that his anxiety didn't decrease now that they were alone made his nerves frayed. He felt stifled, still restless and had had to stop his knee from jiggling underneath the table.
What was happening to his new life? Had it become so readily monotonous that he was seeking for something he didn't even know?
There was another couple seated a few tables away from them and in his absentmindedness, his golden lashes moved slightly when his light blue eyes met that of an attractive young woman's who seemed to be about a year younger than them. She blushed and lowered her eyes demurely while her boyfriend surveyed the menu.
He felt it then, surging through his veins... That power of a hunter going about his prey, it was instantaneous and sudden, but it caused him to smirk at the pretty girl, using that patented lazy half smile to make her avert her eyes away from him. It wasn't as if he hadn't been checked out since he and Annette had started dating, in fact, the female attention increased when he became loyal to the blonde, but his adamant and persistent feelings for Annette had merely made it so easy to brush the girls off without a second thought.
A warm weight placed itself on top of his hand and he looked away from the blushing young debutante, immediately his mind when back to its mischievous ways, that scheming predator who had been previously hidden in a secret drawer at the back of somewhere inside of him was probably succeeding in clawing his way out.
Hm.. He wondered if the girl was a…
"Sebastian? Are you listening to me?" Annette's hurt voice caused him to jerk back and look at her guiltily, his full mouth turning up into an apologetic grin.
For their first month together, the night didn't seem to last long enough but was it possible… Why was it that now, it seemed like the time passed by extraordinarily slow?
When he drove her back to her house, they had stood on the porch with her arms wrapped around him and her head buried against his chest. He wondered if she heard his heart thudding wildly and sought to silence it by pressing his lips against hers. The kiss grew heated and she started giving off small moans that would normally have driven him to a lust and love driven passion.
"I can't tonight." She whispered in his ear when his hand cupped her breast. "My mother's coming to visit and I have to have breakfast with her tomorrow morning... I can't stay up long."
Sebastian slowly let her go and smiled reassuringly when she checked his face for any expression of disappointment. He hugged her tight and left, her murmured words replaying in his ear.
"I love you, Sebastian."
"Goodnight, Annette."
While he drove home, the anxiety lessened. Everything felt wrong somehow, and he knew why. Sebastian felt two kinds of hunger: the first kind he knew all too well and due to his past trysts with beautiful women, he knew exactly how to fulfill it, but the second one… It was difficult to understand it. He felt… Odd. Curtailed… Something… He needed something.
That night he brought a girl home, some pretty young thing he'd met at one of Blaine's parties. As they tumbled in his room, she grabbed handfuls of his hair while he peppered her face with small kisses. The clothing was shed and their bodies rubbed against each other sensually, his palm cupping her bottom while she grinded her hips against him.
"It's my four month anniversary with my girlfriend." He growled, his teeth gritted with concentration while she straddled him. He didn't know why he said it, but the girl's bright blue eyes gleamed in triumph. He squeezed her hips and she grabbed his arousal to penetrate her. They both groaned at the feeling of being inside another person and Sebastian licked his lips, pushing Annette out of his thoughts.
He needed release.
The guilt was there, but it was only to a subliminal degree.
"Ride me." He groaned, running his hands up and down her torso and the girl obliged.
"Happy anniversary, Sebastian." The girl half cried out in wanton need, her voice teasing and seductive. Her mouth was partly open, pale skin covered with sweat and small hands gripped his shoulders while she pumped up and down, back and forth, concerned with her own feeling of gratification that he was only too eager to fill.
"Sebastian, have you seen my—"
The door opened and he looked up to see Kathryn standing before them, her green eyes widening in shock at the girl who was obviously not his girlfriend. His bed partner looked affronted at the intrusion but Kathryn only looked her over before another look came upon her surprised features.
Sebastian's grip loosened on the girl and he opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. Now everything was obvious, and he couldn't believe he hadn't noticed it before.
His chosen partner bore a light shade of brown hair.
No, no. Surely this was just a coincidence.
Kathryn turned and left without another word, closing the door shut.
"Was that your girlfriend?" The girl demanded and he flipped her over, sheathing himself inside of her fully and beginning a furious rhythm of thrusting, in and out, their skins slapped against each other and her moans filled the room.
He didn't bother explaining.
"Happy anniversary." He mumbled imperceptibly in her brown hair as he came.
Sebastian remembered that look on her face when he laid on his bed hours later, alone and sated for now. A month after she'd started giving him the silent treatment, his temper had snapped when she brushed past him for the tenth time and since he wasn't used to it and he knew that if he confronted her, he would only get a slap, he tried the next best thing.
He went inside her room when she was high.
"What are you doing here?"
"I need to know something."
"What?" her eyes were glazed over and she was squinting at him.
"Those who opposed you and betrayed you, you went ahead with retribution. Court Reynolds, Cecile Caldwell… You held nothing back."
A knowing smile flickered over her lips, "You're curious as to whether or not I'm planning something then?"
"If you respect your opponent you should at least give him a fair warning." He replied, sitting across her on the bed and automatically pulling up the straps of her nightgown.
She looked at him then, curious and wondering. "Are you my enemy, Sebastian?"
He stared back, fearless and yet nervous at the same time. "You tell me."
In her altered state, she looked luminous and happy, her amused laugh not of mockery but of real clarity. At the sight of his grim face, she immediately sobered up and pouted like a petulant little child, running her hand through his hair affectionately.
"Soft, almost like my blanket." She whispered, her words jumbling into one.
He seemed to stop breathing.
She continued, trailing her fingers on his face, memorizing his features like she'd done the night they were together. "Warm, like a perfect summer day… Like our summers at the Hamptons. Do you remember?"
He felt his throat constrict. He did.
He remembered the rays of sun burning that pale skin deliciously golden brown, the long nights of drinking, and the automatic shifting of one's seat so as to accompany the other. Sebastian remembered the nights they were with other partners and how it never bothered them externally but perhaps… Perhaps inside they felt the smallest twitch of restlessness that permeated their cynical souls when they sensed the essence of another person on each other's bodies.
Perhaps… But he never could tell and it was time to stop trying to understand something that would never be allowed to be comprehended.
Her thumb caressed his full lips and it parted on its own volition, "Cold and warm at the same time…" she murmured more to herself, seeming to forget that there was another present in the room. Her hand trailed to his chest, placing it over his erratically beating heart. "Like this. Like you. You used to be all those things for me, now you're not."
He wasn't used to her talking like a child with all honesty. Her musings seemed to be to be directed to no one and he knew that she only talked this way around him in her drugged out moments.
"Don't hurt Annette." It was meant to be a threat but under her gentleness, it was more like a whispered plea.
Her hand dropped as though the mere mention of Annette's name scalded her skin. "Revenge, Sebastian, is meticulously planned… Every detail… Every moment… It's all a game I love to partake and indulge in. Those people you've mentioned and the countless others whom I had, in some ways, destroyed, their ruinations were planned with utmost pleasure. I imagined them night after night during the early stages of the manipulation, faces pleading for me to stop, to grant them the mercy I'm not capable of. I do it simply because I enjoy seeing them suffer, and take great pleasure in them… But you, dear brother…" her voice dropped down to a low volume.
"The answer to that mind boggling question you've presented is simple." She replied, looking at him. "I don't do things that don't give me pleasure."
His mouth dropped open and she turned away from him, yawning to herself while the drugs eventually made her groggy.
"I've said enough. Goodnight and never try to take advantage of my inebriated state again… I won't be so obliging next time."
A/N: I think this is my favorite story for some reason… Why? Because it's actually already finished. All five acts are already written and I just add a bit every now and then. This is the first one wherein I know how it ends therefore I'm more organized and it's not a big tumble of twists and turns.
Unfeeling:
Yes thank you for the first review! Yey! It gives me the
jollies when I receive an FF Review Alert. Yes, and the fact that she's
not out
for blood is actually why I like this story above everything I've
written. Even AIE. I like this better than AIE and BGA and
everyfrickinthing. Hahahaha!
Babeekim: Aww dearie so you missed me? Well I've been busy as hell lately so I don't know about updating ALL of them. Just email me and I'll tell you how they end so you won't have to wait. Hahaha.
Nicole: Awww anything I write? So… if I write Blaine and Sebastian doing it you'll still read it and like it? Lol… But… ick. Don't worry that'll never happen.
Sophia: You know I like your name I've always wanted to use it in a story but it never happened. Perhaps one of these days though. Anyway, thanks for the good luck! I don't think it worked because I just got eaten alive by my stupid exam. Boohoo. I still have two more to go before I am ruled by freedom once again!
Celeste: Twice the review! Wow! I didn't know you read my other stuff though and because of reading your review I even went back to one of my unfinished fics but alas, I am in vain.
