Disclaimer: Still do not own.
And the Lying and Crying
Caroline noticed Max acting weird for some time after the movie premiere. She seemed out of it more than usual and all through their diner shift Max didn't make one smart remark at Han. And if that fact wasn't uncharacteristic enough, she was being nice to the customers. To be honest, that scared Caroline a little. Whipping off tables, smiling, and just about any other pleasant behavior told you that Max was hurting. She didn't even have the energy to be herself. Once closing time came, Caroline slid into the booth Max had been whipping off for what felt like hours. Max was clearly lost in thought and her mouth pulled down into a frown. Her eyebrows furrowed. She continued cleaning the same exact spot on the table.
"Are you okay?" her roommate asks. Max sighs, but still doesn't say a word. Caroline wasn't sure of what was going on, but she knew Max hated to talk about things. Still, Caroline thought holding in your pain was never a good idea. It was best to let whatever it is out so the weight went away. She also made a mental note to kick herself later for being such a cheese ball. "If you want to talk I'm here."
"The engagement is off," she says fleetingly.
Max took off to clean another table, which she was obviously using as a way to get out of talking. Usually whenever "girl talk" was around the corner, either cheesecake or Caroline's "big-eye-painting face" drew her in. Caroline follows her.
"What?"
"The engagement is off."
"Why?"
"I guess he wasn't ready for marriage after all and called it off."
"He called it off?"
"Yeah."
Max knew what came next. The face; the pouty, sympathetic face she gave her when something happened that sucked. "Don't even think about it."
Caroline decides to play dumb. "Don't think about what?"
"Don't give me that face."
"Are you okay?"
"I mean, I'm not great, but I'll live."
"It's okay if you're sad, Max," Caroline reassures as Max slides into the booth.
"I will be fine."
"You don't want to talk about it?" she questions sliding in opposite of her.
"There's really nothing to talk about."
Max knew that statement wreaked of a lie. In fact, everything wreaked of a lie. Max was aware that Caroline knew Randy was crazy about her. He flew all the way from LA to New York just for her. They were only together for a little under a month (before they broke up) and he already went down on one knee and Max said yes. She also cried. Not tears of happiness, tears of another kind. It grew tiresome trying to act like she loved Randy and so she called it quits. There was no way Caroline could know that, though. She always found a way to get what she wanted. She would pry and pry until she found out and that worried Max. What would she think of her when she did find out? Would they remain friends? Would she not feel the same way? Max stayed in constant worry and it made her think maybe it was a mistake to call of the engagement. Maybe living in denial was easier than dealing with the truth.
"Max, you're zoning out again."
Damn you Caroline for being so sweet.
Damn you Caroline for being such an amazing friend.
Damn you Caroline for looking so good.
Max couldn't stand how much she loved her.
All the years of living with Max and Caroline still felt like he hadn't gotten her figured out just yet. What Caroline didn't know wouldn't kill her. While Max decided to keep a tight-lip on the details, Caroline decided to take matters into her own hands.
That night after the two of them walk home, Caroline sneaks out to try and find Randy. She knew he probably didn't plan on sticking around for much longer. He most likely wanted to get back to his firm in LA. She looks around for hours around the diner, where he was staying, other restaurants and the park before finally spotting him at the bar. She stalks up to him and puts her hands on her hips while he was busy sipping on something brown. Randy looks up from his drink, puts it down and stands up.
"Caroline, what are you doing here?"
"I just wanted to say that you made the biggest mistake of your life. Max is an incredible woman and you'll never find anyone like her ever again." When she is done fuming, Randy puts his hands into his pockets and nods.
"I already know," he admits almost crestfallen.
"You know?"
"I'm a wreck," he exhales. "When Max called off the engagement I was a mess. I asked her why and-" Randy stops short almost as if he was about to spill something he wasn't supposed to. "Max and I met up at the dessert bar after hours to talk."
.
.
.
"Randy, I have to talk to you about something."
"What's wrong?"
Max took a deep, drawn out breath. It was hard enough practice saying it in the mirror, but now that the time came for real, it was that much harder.
"I can't marry you."
"Why can't you?" he frowns. Max looks down trying her best not to cry. He automatically knew she stood serious. Randy never seen her this dismayed and the state of her alone was enough to reassure his doubts. "Hey," he steps closer to her and begins to rub her arms. He wasn't complete oblivious to the fact that Max had been with many others long before he arrived. In a way, it seemed selfish for him just to take her away from everyone she cares for - especially if she loved them more than she loved him.
"I just can't force myself to marry you."
"I don't want to force you to do anything you're not uncomfortable with, Max. We can get married whenever you're ready."
"That's just it, Randy," Max cries into his shoulder. "I'll never be ready because I don't love you."
Randy stops rubbing her arms and they lock eyes. His brown ones swirl into her blue swollen ones. It's as time suddenly stopped for the both of them. One broken, one confused and it became even worse for them as the silence set in. Randy had so many questions as to why she would say "yes" in the first place. Had she really strung him along like that?
Max knew she couldn't be the first one to talk. She felt guilty, relieved, and nauseous all at once. Please say something, she thought. Don't make me the bad guy in this situation. She searched his eyes again this time seeing pain.
"Can I ask you a question?" Randy asks. She nods. "Is it Caroline?"
Max starts to cry again, "Yeah."
Randy pulls her in for another hug.
"I'm not mad at you."
"Well you should be," Max hits his shoulder to distance them. Randy keeps a strong grip on her arms.
"Well I'm not. I'm the one that would've felt terrible marrying someone who didn't love me back."
.
.
.
Randy told Caroline just about everything omitting the part where Max admits to loving her. That was for Max to tell her not him.
"That makes no sense. Why would she lie about who broke off the engagement?"
Randy decides to play dumb. "I have no idea. I'm just a man trying to drown his sorrows in hard liquor."
"You really loved her, didn't you?"
"I'm not the one she loves."
"Who does she love?"
"I think you'll find out sooner or later."
