Chapter 27: Checking up.
Jay/Hailey. Set after series 7. At Kim and Adam's wedding, Jay and Hailey finally confessed their feelings and spent the night together and now they are back in Chicago and hiding their relationship from their friends.
Next chapter, follows directly after the last one.
Enjoy and please review.
I do not own Chicago PD or any of the characters.
The silence that followed the door slam was almost defending. The shock was clear in everyone's faces, besides Hailey's. She had seen this coming. Jay was angry with himself, not that any of what had happened was his fault, but that was how his brain was wired and the PTSD attack had peaked his anxiety, his bad moods and his irritability. She understood that, but Kim, Kevin and Adam didn't, especially Adam. The man was not known for his emotional intelligence.
Adam just stared at the door, then joked, "Who woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?"
"Adam, it's not funny!" Kim snapped at her husband. "You saw how Jay was after the shooting yesterday. I've never seen him like that before. It really affected him, and we should be supportive. Hailey, what do you think?"
In silence, Hailey watched Jay through the glass of his office. He was pacing the length of his office, with his hands on his hips. His hands were shaking. He looked really ill. She nodded slowly as she replied, "Yeah, just be supportive. He'll be okay."
Adam frowned, confused, and asked, in an annoyed tone of voice, "So, we just let him talk to us like that?"
Hailey turned around and fixed Adam with her eyes, as she replied, in a steady, but stern voice, "Yes, we do, Adam. He's our Sergeant and our friend and, unless you have first-hand experience of PTSD, I suggest you keep your mouth shut and back off."
The message was clear, even to Adam, so he just nodded and said, "Yes, ma'am." Within the unit, besides with Jay's new position as Sargent, it wasn't often that the difference in rank was made, between detectives and officers and Hailey thought that Adam needed to know it, especially with Jay as he was today. Adam turned away and Hailey sat down, wishing she could do more for Jay than just set up his appointment for tonight. All she could do was what she had always done, what he always did for her: Be there, as his partner, as his best friend.
It was a paperwork day. Jay spent the entire day in his office and this did not go unnoticed, but no-one wanted to risk being growled at again. Hailey was glad, at least, that Adam had ceased his remarks.
Hailey took some papers downstairs for Platt to sign and, when she was there, Platt looked at her, over her glasses and observed, "I heard Chuckles growled at you all up there." She paused, before she turned her full attention to Hailey and asked, with genuine concern, "Is he ok? I saw he didn't look right this morning. The bags under his eyes. His hands were shaking. Was it the shooting yesterday?"
Sliding her papers across the desk, Hailey rested her arms against the desk and sighed. "Yeah." She lowered her voice before she continued, "For about half an hour afterwards, he just stared into space. He didn't move. He didn't speak. He came back, eventually, and when he did, he cried in my arms for ages. I got him his medication. He had them this morning and last night and I've made an appointment for him. I think the fact that the guy he had to shot was an Army sniper made it even worse. I don't think there's anything else I can. Quite frankly, Adam didn't help the situation earlier."
With a sarcastic look in her eyes, Platt just remarked, "Shocker." Her face turned serious, before she added, "Hailey, all you can do is what you're already doing. Just be there for him. It'll be tough, but Jay's been through worse. He's a war hero and he'll be okay." Hailey tilted her head with this last bit, and Platt added, "I have access to all of the personal files, so I've seen his medals from the Army."
There was a silence and Hailey gave the older woman a smile and a nod, before she went back upstairs to Intelligence.
The rest of their shift passed fairly quickly and Jay spent the whole time in his office, away from everyone else. Kim invited Hailey to Molly's, but Hailey declined the offer and, even though Kim said nothing, she knew why. Hailey was Jay's best friend and the only person he seemed to trust at times like this. She was the only one of the unit he truly trusted at the best of times.
Hailey knocked on the door and Jay looked up, startled. She could see the panic in his eyes. He was struggling to breathe. It was his anxiety. Slowly so as not to spook him, Hailey walked over to him and knelt in front of him, breathing in and out, until Jay's breathing settled with hers. His green eyes found hers and he rested his head against hers and closed his eyes, clearly exhausted. Hailey kissed his forehead, then told him, "I'll give you a lift to your appointment and then we'll go back to your place."
With a strained breath, Jay shook his head and just said, "No. Your place." In response, Hailey just nodded. He felt safe there and she was glad of that. For Jay, feeling safe was important, especially at a time like this.
Two hours later, Jay found Hailey in the carpark. Hailey could see how tired Jay was, but she was glad that he had talked to someone about yesterday and she knew that he was, too. Jay sat still in the car, staring out of the window. In a slightly hallow voice, he just said, "I had the shoot one of my own. I knew that- that it was the only choice. But it still happened." Jay paused, then turned to face Hailey, reaching out for one of her hands. "You've been with me through everything. You were there for me last night. Holding me. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"You don't have to worry about that, because I'm not going anywhere, partner."
