I ran all the way to The Leaky Cauldron. I was just trying to help, I kept saying to myself. Why I was helping Draco-no no! Malfoy! Why I was trying to help Malfoy , I really did not know. He had been my enemy since, well, forever. He had always insulted me and my family. I don't know why (but now I of course do) I felt bad for this guy. I really should have shrugged it off. My life, for the next year, would have been so much easier. But I didn't I couldn't stop thinking about him. As I laid in my bed that night, I remember crying, for no reason at all. Draco Malfoy changed everything that day. It might not look big right now. But he changed my thoughts about him. I used to think of him as an arch nemesis, who needed to be "taken care of." But after that I couldn't help but feel sad for him. He was being forced and controlled against his free will.
Malfoy haunted my dreams for the next two weeks, creeping in and out, his beaten face always refreshed in my mind. I was being distant towards everyone. My whole family noticed the change. I don't even know why I was acting this way. I mean, even if I couldn't get his name and face out of my head, why did I have to be so isolated from the world? I think it was because I felt guilty. Guilty thinking this way about him.
I was dreading the first day of term, but it wasn't until two days before the summer ended that I realized how much I didn't want to go back. I had just been writing a letter to Claire when I heard a tip tapping on my window. I looked over and there was a brown tawny owl sitting on my windowsill. After I had opened the window, untied the letter, and sent the owl on its way, I read:
Dear Mrs. Weasley,
We apologize for the delay with this letter. Congratulations!
You have been selected to be one of this year's exchange students. You will be placed in a different house for the year, to try to unite more of the students of the school. On September 1 you will attend a meeting on the Hogwarts Express o find out what house you will be placed in. If you would like to decline this offer, you may, but please send us a letter as soon as possible to ensure that another student will be able to participate. We hope that you will except this once in a lifetime offer.
Sincerely,
Minerva McGonagall
Minerva McGonagall
Deputy Headmistress
You have got to be kidding me, I thought. I was already having a crappy summer, I really didn't want to have a crappy year too without all of my friends. But sadly I knew in my heart that my parents would make me do it. I grabbed Claire's letter and wrote:
Oh noooo! Claire! I just got a letter and I have to go to a new house at Hogwarts for the WHOLE YEAR! Omg, what if they put me in Slytherin. Oh man I really hope they don't. Well I'll see you in a few days!
Love,
A very VERY very VERY sad Ginny Weasley
I sent the letter with Errol and started downstairs into the kitchen to tell Mum and Dad. What I didn't know at the time was that Harry had just arrived. And me being in my pajama's would have liked to known that. I walked into the kitchen and instantly saw Harry smiling and eating a piece of toast. He looked over at me and said, "Hey Ginny! How's it goin'?" I gave a weak smile and sat down next to Ron, feeling the worst in days. Ron must've noticed my sad mood because as I was spreading butter on my toast he asked, "Gin? Are you feeling okay?" I have no idea why this happened. I was sitting there trying terribly to hide my pain and all of a sudden tears began to stream down my face. I handed him my letter.
"Hey guys! It's so good to see you." I heard a voice say from the doorway. And there was Hermione smiling widely, though her smile faded quickly at the sight of my face. She ran over to me and gave me a hug saying, "Oh sweetie! What's wrong?"
"This! I can't believe they chose you. I mean, if you are going to Slytherin, well….you're not. You'd have the worst year ever with all those-"
"Ron, what in the world are you talking about?" Hermione asked while sitting down. My mother then walked in and asked, "What's going on? What is all the yelling for?" Ron started talking about what happened though no one heard him because I was crying so hard and Hermione was mollifying me. I felt bad for Harry who was sitting in the midst of talking and crying and yelling. After a minute or so I couldn't take it anymore.
"STOP!" I yelled it so loud I bet people in China could have heard it. Harry, Ron, Hermione, and my mother all looked at me with worried looks on there faces. I sighed deeply. I ripped the letter from Ron's hand and handed it to my mother who read it silently. When she was finished she folded it back up and looked at me, her face full of sympathy.
"Sweetie, I think that this will be a good experience for you. But if you really do not want to do it, we need to write back quickly." Oh great, I thought. If I said no, mom and dad would be disappointed at me for the rest of the year. I laid my head on the hard wood table and thought, what's the worst that could happen? Hahaha, I think about that now and I could have never guessed what happened. The thoughts didn't even enter my mind as I said, "Yeah, Mum, I'll do it."
My father didn't come home until the last day before term started. When he came in I was up in my bedroom finishing some undone Potions homework. Not wanting to see him much, I stayed at my desk and wrote a few sentences before he opened my door. I looked at him and wasn't sure what to say.
"I'm home." He said. He came closer and I looked at his face carefully. It looked like he had been crying.
"I can tell." I said and looked back at my essay. He stood there for a moment. I just realized that he was crying. "Father?" He turned away from me and stared at a picture of my mother…my mother…
"Where is she?" I asked urgently. He started crying even harder and turned back towards me.
"She's dead…Voldemort killed her right after you left. It's your punishment for your fading loyalty." He whispered and left my room. I heard his door slam, knocking over some very expensive objects. It took a long time for my father's words to sink in, but when they finally did, I fell to the floor and the tears started coming. My mother was dead. Voldemort killed her…and because of me. I killed my own mother. Maybe not with my own hands, but with my actions. Why? Why did I have to disapparate that day? Why did I have to disagree with my father? For the rest of the day I did nothing. I just sat and thought about how I would never see my mother's face again.
At 9 o'clock I realized I hadn't packed for Hogwarts and so after a few hours I had put all my things in a large suit case. After, I flopped onto my large bed and cried myself to sleep, and just wished it was the next day. Not that I was looking forward to work and studying, but it would definitely keep my mind off my mother's death.
The next morning I woke up to the sound of my father creeping into my bedroom. I opened my eyes quickly enough to see my father standing at my window.
"I have to go…Voldemort needs me. I'll write you when you get to Hogwarts. You might want to get up. The train leaves in an hour." He said quietly, still not making eye contact with me. I started to get angry. After what he did to my mother, how could my father just go back to him?
"Father!" I yelled standing up out of bed, "WHY? WHY ARE YOU GOING BACK TO THE MAN WHO KILLED YOUR WIFE AND MY MOTHER? HOW CAN YOU JUST FORGIVE HIM FOR THAT?" My father looked at his feet then turned to look at me. He looked miserable. His face still haunts me today. His eyes were red and puffy and it looked like he hadn't had sleep for months. He shook his head and left swiftly.
