Chapter 2

"Look, do you mind if I go out for a smoke?" Leigh asked. The table fell into thunderous, embarrassed silence. Leigh's date, Luke Allen, who had been taking a small gulp of his lemon water, nearly choked on it. He put the glass back on the fancy tablecloth, the ice cubes tinkling softly. He lifted his hands as though he wanted to run them through his soft dark hair, but dropped them, inches away.

That's right, don't mess up your hair, Leigh thought, trying not to laugh. People thought her such a calm person because she didn't dare act on what she was thinking half the time. There was wisdom in keeping some thoughts to yourself. In Leigh's case, that pretty much applied all thoughts.

Amber's eyes were shooting daggers at her from her seat next to Luke. Alec was sitting right beside Leigh so she didn't get a look at his face. She could imagine what his laughing brown eyes were doing: just that. Laughing. He was the type to get amusement out of discomfort.

"G-go ahead," Luke finally managed. She could tell he was trying his hardest not to let the disgust show in his face. His lip was curling slightly.

She couldn't feel his emotions, though. He was human. She wished she hadn't agreed to go on this date in the first place. Not only was he completely not her type, but it felt vapid somehow…to talk to a date and not be able to feel his emotions. But the only two dateable werewolves in all of Lampton Hill were already dating other people. Besides, she didn't want either Porter or Alec. Porter was—well, Porter. He had his life so together it annoyed her sometimes. And Alec could drive her up the wall.

The only reason she was on this date tonight was because she had a soft spot for her friends—in this case, Amber. "You have to go to Prom!" Amber had said. "This is our Senior Year! You'll never get another chance. Besides, I've found the perfect date for you."

Well, after one perfect night at the dance, they were dining at the Riverside Diner having perfect lovely conversations—and everyone was having the perfect amount of fun. The perfectness was getting to her so much that she was feeling stifled. And the cravings were getting to her, making her jittery. She'd gone cold turkey for two weeks and was pretty darn proud of herself. But after a night like tonight, anyone would want a smoke—well, anyone who'd ever tried one before.

She knew she never should have started. It was a near impossible habit to kick—even with her werewolf cells. But werewolf cells didn't modify chemical addictions. It wasn't quite the same thing as instantly healing brain injuries.

She wished Jamie had come along so that she wouldn't have to be smothered by model figures with popular reputations and clothes to match. She felt like she was at a shop-a-holics-are-us convention. Amber was and always would be her friend, but they had near nothing in common. Jamie, at least, shared some of her down-to-earth tendencies. But Jamie and Porter had opted for an alone date in which they had specifically emphasized the alone part.

The two had been dating for about six months now. Leigh was almost envious of their close relationship. It was strange to think that Bella had been kidnapped only six months ago. It felt like a lifetime ago. Everything had been so quiet, so normal after that hectic week. It had taken Leigh at least a month after that to settle down to a normal routine. It was as though she had expected another set of problems to roll their way.

"Great," she said, smiling fakely. She squeezed passed Alec's knees, who didn't bother to get up and let her through. Selfish jock, she thought with amusement. Alec had always been like that. She loved him anyway—in a completely platonic sort of way.

She nodded to a waitress as she hurried out the door, promising. "I'll be back. My friends are still sitting at the table."

The waitress nodded back politely.

Leigh stepped out the door and breathed in the cool night air. She stood in the soft illumination that surrounded the restaurant, giving it a romantic setting. Beyond the pool of light, the world had fallen into blackness. Leigh could see more than most with her sensitive eyes, but right now, she really didn't care to. She gazed up at the blue-black sky, dotted with thousands of twinkling stars. The sky never got completely black here, not with the thousands of lights bursting forth in the Chicago district. Even out in a secluded town like Lampton Hill, it was still hard to get away from it completely. Leigh fumbled with her purse, her hands shaking slightly. Note to self, she thought mockingly, you know you're in withdrawal when…

She didn't finish the mental sentence. She didn't need to.

She took out the cigarette and lighted it eagerly. The smoke scent flared up in her nostrils immediately. She lifted the white cylinder to her mouth and that's when Mr. Guilt decided to bite her in the rear. She had been doing so well just to give it up now. For one lousy little date. With a sigh, she dropped the cigarette to the ground, grinding it underneath her heel. Blast these shoes too, she thought as a pain shot up her ankle. Amber had made her wear them.

With a sudden thought she hurried away from the restaurant out toward the river. The rushing sound filled her senses, lulling her into a peaceful calm. She rummaged through her purse, pulling free the whole carton. With the deft flick of her hand, she threw the whole thing into the water. Now temptation was no longer a step away.

She moved back into the restaurant just as the waiter was bringing out their desserts. The piece of chocolate cake that the waitress set before her was draped with chocolate sauce and whipped cream. A tiny cherry sat at the top, glistening red against the white whipped cream. She took a thoughtful bite before pushing the plate aside. She just wasn't hungry. She had too many other things on her mind.

Luke's eyes lit up. "I'll eat that," he offered.

She nodded distantly, caught up in her thoughts.

She was bursting with joy the moment that Amber decided it was time to leave. The ride home in Luke's car was a little awkward. He talked about sports and about being in the class presidency and applying for college.

Leigh examined her fingernails absently. She hadn't even started on her college applications. It was still too weird thinking that she was growing up—that she was eighteen now. As soon as she graduated in a month, her parents would probably kick her out too. They thought she was a bad influence on her little brothers and that she could do with a bit of experience in the real world—dealing with finances and such stuff. She wasn't sure she was quite ready to grow up.

Luke dropped herself off in front of her white stucco house. He didn't bother to walk her to the door—which she was fine with. She didn't want this to lead anywhere either.

She hurried inside, shutting the door softly behind her. Connor and Jake were probably already in bed. She could hear the soft drone of the news playing in the other room. Her father must have crashed on the couch after a long day at work.

"Hi, dad," she said to him as she stepped through the living room to reach the kitchen. Her father, who was too tuned into the news, didn't answer. Not that she cared—she had more urgent issues to deal with. Now that she was home, she wanted some real food. Human food was tasty, but by no means satisfying. Her stomach rumbled emptily. The restaurant food had already passed through her system. She had hurried to the little girl's room just before leaving the Riverside Diner. Instant bran, she thought, her lip quirking in a half-smile.

She pulled out a slice of raw steak, gnawing on it immediately. She knew her mother would shake a finger at her if she saw. She should at least put some spices on it to add flavor, but she like this raw taste. Food policy number one: Don't mess with what works.

Her cell phone jangled in her pocket. She grumbled, dumping the steak on the clean countertop. She wiped her hands with a rag and pulled the phone free. "Hello?" she asked.

"It's me," Amber answered cheerily.

"This better be good," Leigh informed her calmly, "because you just interrupted me from my dinner."

"It is," Amber's voice answered back, a little snappy. She and Porter could instinctively tell when Leigh was a little grumpy, even though no one else could. They'd just known each other too long. "So what did you think of him?"

"Was I supposed to think something?" Leigh asked in a bored voice. She took out a knife and cut off a chunk of meat one-handed. She chewed on it as Amber replied.

"Of course you were! He was your date."

"Stuffy," she replied around a mouthful of steak. "And rich."

"Rich is a good thing," Amber replied hopefully. "Rich is nice. He could buy you lots of presents."

Leigh didn't care about that, but there was no point in explaining this to Amber. Amber would simply refuse to believe that she found more pleasure out of sentimental gifts than a pair of thousand dollar earrings.

"He's just not my type," Leigh responded. "Besides, I'm not really on the market."

"Leigh, you're single," Amber's tone was incredulous. "Of course you're on the market. You can't really help but be."

"I like being single. Gives me room to do what I want."

"Just tell me what kind of guy you like," Amber pestered.

Stuffy, rich ones," Leigh replied, rolling her eyes. "Honestly? I don't know."

It was better that Amber think her a hopeless case than to tell her the truth. She did know what kind she liked. Ones with crying souls. Ones who were just aching to put their lives back together. And ones who could enjoy discussing the meaning of life. But this would seem completely absurd to Amber, so she didn't bother to mention it.

Besides, she really wasn't on the market. She had more important things to think about. Like her problems at home. Amber didn't know about that. She wasn't going to tell her, though, because Leigh didn't share that kind of information. She never had.