Yo! I can't tell you guys how happy reading all these reviews makes me. Seriously. Thank you to all readers so far!

Seated at Gryffindor Table, Harry yawned tiredly. Hermione, who was sitting across him, watched him sympathetically, her brown eyes somewhat sad. "Bad night, Harry?" she asked softly, her voice concerned. She knew he had to deal with nightmares, a lot more of them than he let on too. She hated it.

But Harry shook his head. "Nah, not this time. I spent most of the night reading cause Ron wouldn't stop snoring. Sounded like bloody Snorlax."

Now, Hermione smiled, deciding to focus on the book, rather than...the other bit. "What part are you on?"

"The three just met the Riders of Rohan." Harry grinned now. "I like how impressed Eomer is with Aragorn. But it's Aragorn, so it's totally warrante-"

"Harry?"

Harry nodded towards the Staff Table, expression rather grim. "Look. Dumbledore actually bothered to grace us with his presence. About time, if you ask me."

Hermione looked over now, and raised a brow. "Oh, well, isn't this a surprise?" she said somewhat sarcastically.

This was the first time the Headmaster had bothered showing his face since the second article had been published. And everyone noticed it. What was the old man up to?

Dumbledore paid no attention to either the staff or students, and simply tossed his long beard over his shoulder and began to eat. Despite the confused glances and suspicious whispers, he continued to ignore them all.

When the owls streamed in with the mail, no one was sure if they were relieved or disappointed to see there still wasn't any sort of follow up article in the Prophet about what Dumbledore was really up to.

Having finished his breakfast, Dumbledore got to his feet and walked out of the Great Hall, not realizing Harry had been glaring at him furiously the entire time. No one else really noticed it either, most of them wondering what the heck was going on with the Headmaster. Why bother coming in here to eat, when he could have just stayed up in his office like he'd been doing? It wasn't as if he had interacted with anyone. Not even a ghost. Unless someone invisible had been standing behind him or something.

Harry just sighed. Hopefully Voldemort would find more out soon. The teen didn't know much more himself, and had given the Dark Lord all the information he did have, but he knew this wasn't enough. Not nearly. Yes, people were beginning to question things, but not to the extent where it would really make a difference.

Dumbledore still had far too much power and influence for proper change to be implemented. And change was something this world needed. Desperately.

"Hey, Hermione?"

"Hmm? What is it, Harry?"

"I just realized I have two and a half months to figure out what to send Voldemort for his birthday."

Hermione opened her mouth to reply, closed it, opened it again, and then just blinked. "What...did I just hear?" she questioned in confusion.

"I have to find Voldemort a birthday present?"

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

"..."

"..."

"...So, what do Dark Lords like anyway? Virgin sacrifices?"

Hermione buried her face in her hands. "This is what I get for not listening to dad's friend's roommate's cousin's babysitter's exchange student," she mumbled faintly, and Neville, who was seated next to her, just patted her shoulder in sympathy.

"Oh! Maybe I can send him Ginny!"

"Harry!" the witch exclaimed in admonishment.

The green eyed teen nodded in agreement. "You're right, I can't send her. She isn't a virgin. I saw her in that orgy with the Hufflepuffs. I know you and Luna still are, but I love you two too much to want you dead!"

"Harry!"

But Harry just cocked his head, too lost in thought to pay proper attention. "Ooh! I should just send him Ron!"

"Har-wait, what?"

The Boy-Who-Lived grinned. "No one ever said it had to be a female virgin," he pointed out correctly. "And Ron sure as Dobby hasn't slept with anyone yet. The husk of corn under his pillow kind of gave that away."

"Oh god..."

Ah...yeah. I don't even know. I'm still trying to work out the rest of the plot, but I know the general direction I want things to go in. Life, man, life. Just keeps getting in the bloody way. Looking forward to reviews! Laterz!