All By Myself
GCCS Friendship Set after S5 'No Humans Involved'. It seemed the change was taking more getting used to for some more than others.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or CSI. I do however own my imagination, my Muse, my insanity, my fangirliness and my dreams.
A/N:- Why is it that when I have so many essays and exams to be studying for, my Muse thinks this is a good time to go into overdrive! Anyway here's more jealous-Catherine for you.
Catherine looked down the corridor into the breakroom. Funny how within one night she had gone from being 'one of the guys' to an outsider looking in on the fun. She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. Guess she couldn't have it both ways.
She had come out of her office to go and see Grissom but her usual spot on his desk was now occupied by none other than the recently demoted Sofia Curtis. Wow men really were fickle. Even Grissom.
Out of the corner of her eye she saw Sara in the A/V lab looking even more morose and stressed than usual. Guess she wasn't the only one struggling to get used to the changes around here.
Suddenly she heard voices behind her and a hand rested on her shoulder.
"And here's the new owner of Henry." Gil said and Sofia laughed.
"Who the hell is Henry!" Catherine asked.
"I was just telling Sofia about the foetal pig." Grissom explained.
"Oh right, that thing." She said, pulling a face.
"That's gratitude for you." Grissom said, feigning hurt.
"I think you have a lot to learn about women's taste in interior decorating." Sofia smiled. "Anyway I'm off now. Night Catherine, night Gil."
Catherine winced. She was the only one allowed to call him Gil dammit.
"Well, it certainly didn't take you long to move on." Catherine remarked once the pretty blonde CSI was out of earshot. "You could have at least pretended that you missed me."
"I do miss you and Sofia's never going to replace you as my leading lady, but you and her do share a number of traits: you're both smart, sexy, sassy – oh and you have the ability to keep me on my toes." Gil mused.
"Well, I'm happy for you both." Catherine said dryly.
Gil looked at her curiously. He never thought it was possible for Catherine to feel this way. Sure when Sara had joined the lab the two women had certainly taken awhile to get used to each other but that was more because their personalities clashed than anything else.
"Catherine, when Sofia and I have twenty years of friendship behind us and have been through as many tough times together as we have, then you can start to be jealous." He said honestly with a smile.
"I'm not jealous!" Catherine said stubbornly but buckled under Gil's stare. "Okay, I just miss having you around and having someone who knows what I'm thinking all the time." She admitted.
"I miss that too." Gil said quietly.
Suddenly Catherine broke their gaze and looked away as she saw Sara move about in the lab. "Sorry Gil, can I catch up with you later? I need to talk to Sara."
"Why, what's wrong?" Grissom asked, confused.
"Don't you worry, I'm the people person, remember?" Catherine informed him before heading into the A/V lab.
"Hey there Sara!" Catherine said. She got a tired "Hi" in response as Sara sat back down at the computer and started running through some files.
"Tough case today, huh?"
Sara looked up with a frown. "You're not my supervisor Catherine." She shot. Catherine looked slightly taken aback, slightly angry. "I'm sorry." Sara apologised. "Long day."
"Yeah, why don't you go hang out with the guys in the break room and relax a bit." Catherine suggested.
Sara looked surprised. "I don't mean this to sound rude but we never have these kinds of conversations where you play the concerned colleague looking out for me …."
Catherine smiled. She did wonder herself why she had come in here to talk. "Better late than never, right? Okay, I'll cut to the chase. Men are simply able to detach themselves from cases, we, unfortunately, can't, since God evidently gave us more compassion."
"And …"
"And if you ever need to talk then you can always talk to me."
Sara looked at her stunned. Catherine couldn't blame her. "I know we haven't exactly been best friends but if you ever need someone to vent to and moan about cases – or men to, like after the Hank-thing then you can."
"I appreciate your concern but I'm really not much of a talker." Sara said. Then her eyes narrowed. "Grissom told you about the DIU didn't he?"
Catherine looked slightly guilty. "Grissom tells me most things."
Sara sighed and rubbed her face in her hands. "In which case you'll also know about the time I asked him out and the various other times I've made a fool of myself in front of him."
"Look Sara, it's not my place to say anything but Grissom cares for you and doesn't want to hurt your feelings-"
"But at the same times doesn't want a relationship with me. I get it. You know, you're right – I do hate how it's so easy for women to get so attached to something, even something so silly." Sara sighed. She thought about whether it was pertinent for her to ask this question but Catherine was the one who wanted to talk so …. "What do you think of Sofia Curtis?"
"I think she's smart, intelligent and a great asset to the lab."
Sara raised her eyebrows. "Really?"
"No!" Catherine laughed. "I think she's too assertive, too pretty and fitting in with Grissom too well."
Sara smiled. She never knew what was going on between Catherine and Grissom but she had always been jealous of it, thinking Catherine was doing things on purpose to rub it in her face, but she was slowly beginning to realise that what Grissom and Catherine had went so deep they didn't even realise it themselves. She couldn't possibly compete with that.
"I think she's having a hard time fitting in but it's going to take us all a while to get used to the change." Catherine mused. "Just …" She wondered how to say this. "Just because things are all a bit messy at the moment, don't bury yourself away. I'm speaking from experience."
"I don't have a drink problem." Sara said, offended.
"I know, I wasn't talking about that. I was talking about delving back into the past." Catherine said giving Sara a look before heading towards the door.
Suddenly Sara's defensive attitude came flying back. "What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, glancing at the computer screen, checking that she had covered her mother's court files with another window. She had.
Catherine turned back round. She knew Sara would probably think that she was intruding. "I know what it's like to have the weight of the past on your back. No matter how hard it is you have to just put it to one side sometimes."
"You know nothing about my past Catherine." Sara said sternly.
Catherine sighed. "I have an Aunt who lives in a small town in California. A small town in which twenty years ago there was a very frightened girl who had just seen her abusive father stabbed to death by her mother." Catherine said quietly.
Sara stared right ahead of her, refusing to make eye contact with Catherine, determined to keep a stoic expression on her face. It was so hard coming to terms to the fact that someone else knew. "How long have you known?"
"Since a few months after you arrived here."
"Does Grissom know?"
"No and he won't hear it from me." Catherine reassured her. Sara didn't say anything, she just continued to sit there. "Don't let it eat you up Sara."
Sara stood up. It was strange to think that someone had known her deepest secret for so long without her knowing. "I'm going to kick the guys' asses at cards now." She said suddenly and as cheerfully as she could manage, just as if their conversation had never happened. "You coming?"
"Wish I could but I've got paperwork to do." Catherine sighed, respecting Sara's wishes not to talk about her past anymore.
"Okay." Sara said, walking down the corridor towards the breakroom in the opposite direction to Catherine. Suddenly she spun around. "Catherine?"
Catherine turned and Sara gave her a small nod and a brave smile and Catherine knew she was trying to say 'Thank you'. "Anytime." She smiled, heading back to her office. At least she had done something right today.
She walked into her office and stopped short. Gil was lounging about in a chair in front of an enormous pile of paper he had just placed on her desk. "If you think I'm still going to do you paperwork for you, you've got another thing coming." She said, dropping into her chair. "I've got my own to do."
"I know," Grissom told her. "I thought we could wade through our respective piles whilst enjoying each other's pleasant company but if you want to work alone I can go back to my own office …."
"Of course not." Catherine smiled. "I think we can manage working together." She said, taking a file out of her drawer and opening it.
"So, what did you say to Sara?" Gil asked, looking up from a police report.
"Something I should have said a long time ago."
"Catherine!"
Catherine laughed. "Don't worry, it was nothing like that. More like some cross-team bonding."
"Is she okay?" Gil asked worriedly.
"I think she will be now." Catherine said without looking up from her work.
"I do try to look out for people in my team Catherine. It's just sometimes I don't know what to say to her." He said sadly.
"I know you don't Gil which is why I did it for you." Catherine smiled.
"Everything's okay. Focus on your paperwork." She instructed.
"Yes Supervisor Willows!" Grissom laughed. They worked in comfortable silence for awhile before he spoke again. "You know, I have three tickets to go and see 'Beauty and the Beast' at the theatre this Saturday and I wondered if you and Lindsey wanted to join me?" Catherine looked up and smirked. "Okay, I'll try again." Gil sighed. "'Beauty and the Beast' is on at the theatre this weekend and I miss spending time with my two favourite girls so I was wondering if you two would like to go. If so, I'll book the tickets right away."
Catherine's smirk broke into a grin. "I can't speak for Lindsey but I would love to go to the theatre with you Gil. I'll speak to that daughter of mine but I'm sure she's love to see you again although she's too cool to say it."
"Great!" Gil said and they shared a smile.
Suddenly four CSIs burst into the room interrupting their moment.
"You guys up for breakfast?" Nick asked. Catherine glanced at Sara who smiled back at her.
"Our shift doesn't end for another half an hour." Grissom said looking down at his watch then back up at the pleading faces of Greg, Sara, Nick and Warrick. "But since we've all pulled double shifts, I think we can overlook that." He relented. "Joining us Cath?"
"I certainly am. Don't want you trying to steal back my guys." She said, grabbing her jacket.
"Cool." Greg grinned as the others hurried to the locker room to get their stuff.
"Are we okay?" Gil said, turning to Catherine.
"You buy me breakfast and we'll be more than okay." Catherine smiled.
Gil looked at her fondly and, hand on her back, guided her out of the office.
A/N:- Sorry about the multitude of fics. I don't think I've ever written so much over such a short period of time!
