Her hair fell down her back, like a tear rolled down her chick. All this mess seemed impossible for her, but deep inside she knew that she had to get over it. This should have happened many years out in the future. She couldn't imagine how she should move on and almost get over it. Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder and she knew it was time to say goodbye. "We're all gathered here… I mean thank you.. Thank you for being here today. You have no idea how much it means for me. I wish I could burry my self instead, but I guess that's faith. To loose the person you love the most, should not be possible. Well, this time it did happen. I hate to say goodbye, and in the beginning I didn't intend to, but I realized that it's for my own best. Harrison was the most important thing in my life, and I ever imagined to loose him after only five years. But I'm glad that I'm not alone to say this goodbye. Thank you!" She began to cry when she finished. Her mum was the first one to comfort her.
Hours went by and it was time to say goodbye. They all told her how brave she had been, but in her own opinion she had been a fool. She could never forgive that she had let him play without watching him all the time. And then the car came around the corner. The accident would always stay alive inside her head though Harrison had died. The memory would never die. Then she noticed them. They were standing there in the middle of everything. It was like the whole world was under their control. In a way she admired them, but there was also something. Maybe it was just cause of her. Tess McLeod, the queen of the world, more like her own world. She had everything. Her own place, the man of her dreams, just everything. She was glowing so much. Her smile and eyes made everyman love her. She had once almost married one guy, but then she got tiered of him and decided to pick Nick. In her own opinion she had dumped the other guy because she thought he wasn't over his old wife, but Sally didn't believe that. Suddenly she noticed that they were making their way over to her. As they said goodbye she remembered something from earlier that day:
"She can't be innocent, Nick! She has always hated me and Harrison for getting in your way, right! Maybe she got one of her famous friends to drive the car!" She spit out. She saw him laugh. How could he just laugh when his son was dead, but then she saw how angry he was. " What kind of bullshit is that! Tess would never do that. What in the hell is going on in your head" He yelled back and made her feel so stupid. "You never loved me when we were together, did you? And I guess that Harrison was only another "me"! She's going to have your only child now, and that's what she's always wanted. Now there's no more Harrison or any Sally to get in your way." She whispered .
The wheels turned around and they got further down the road. They had been driving for hours and but there was still many hours left inside the hot car. Nobody of them had said much the last few hours. Maybe it was time to break the ice. "So are you okay?" she asked. He just nodded. Maybe she should have kept her mouth shut, but she didn't. "I know it's maybe not the smartest time, but I just remembered that we never got the results from the DNA-test." She regret it just after she had said it. "What DNA-test?" "The one that was taken just after Harrison was born." And then it began. "So now you're thinking that Harrison wasn't my son?" It was like a stone collapsed on her. Very big and heavy. Sometimes she didn't understood a word of what she was saying. Sometimes words just flew out of her mouth without she wanted them to. How should she save herself this time? "No, not exactly, but we never got an answer and I just remember that you once told me that she just had broken up with someone, when you two got together again. And then Harrison was born about a month to early. Can't you see it?" Nick shook his head and kept going. "God Tess. Now you sound just as stupid as Sally did this morning. What is the problem with women? I'm just asking!" He was almost yelling now, and that made her feel worried, but she felt that she had to end this conversation. But how, she didn't know.
The next three hours was so silent that it was driving them both crazy. They were almost at home when it started again. "Sally was probably right. You really hated Harrison, right Tess?" She wanted to scream but she tried to stay calm, but when they arrived Drover's Run, she couldn't it anymore. "MAYBE I DID! But right at the moment I wonder why you didn't stay in the city with Sally! Why didn't you take her back, when she had Harrison!" She opened the door and ran out as fast as it was possible for her. She was eight months pregnant, so she couldn't do that many things. She got to the bag of the homestead and there she ran into the local vet Dave Brewer's arms. She began to cry so hardly and he was just standing there and letting her let go of her sadness and pain. After a while she only sniffed a bit and began to breath again. Suddenly she felt his hands on her face and he let her into a kiss. This kiss was amazing for him, but these few seconds it last almost killed her. She pulled out of his arms and again tears ran down her face. "Why that?" she yelled through tears. She turned around and ran back, but when she ran around the corner she crushed into Nick's arms. He just looked at her and then he said: "Are you sure that the baby is mine?" She couldn't believe it. Was men made to destroy her life. "Of course it is, but if you doesn't believe me then!"
She was sitting on her bed and Nick's bed. It was now hours ago since it all had happened, but she was still crying so badly. She looked at the photo that was standing beside their bed. It was from their wedding so long ago. They had now been married for more than five years. Suddenly her eyes fell on another picture. It was of her and her beloved sister Claire Louise McLeod, that had died for about six years ago. If she just had been there to comfort her now. She had thought she almost was over it now, but when anything else was stupid and unbelievable she missed her more than anything else. If Charlotte just had been there though.
The next few days past without nothing happened. Tess was in her room and she refused to eat with the others. Sometimes Stevie or Meg tried to talk with her, but it didn't help anything at all. It was now about five days after and suddenly she heard somebody sing outside the window. She went over to the window and opened it. Outside was Dave standing with red roses in one hand. "My Lady! Can I ask for your heart or do you want me to get another hair from the bag of a unicorn?" He gave her a big grin. Anger filled her and she griped a candle on the table and threw it after him. Then the phone called and she heard Meg calling: "Tess it's for you!" She went downstairs for the first time in five days. Maybe it was Nick that wanted to say sorry. But she was wrong. When she picked the phone up she got a little shock when she heard Peter Johnson's voice. "Hey Tess!" Tess suddenly got the feeling that there was something wrong with Charlotte. "Hello Peter! Is Charlotte okay?" "She's not ill, but she's begun to act strange, Tess. The last few times she's been at Drover's she really didn't wanted to go home. She's talking about her coming cousin, and how much she misses you. She screams constantly in the car home, so I've been thinking…" Tess began to feel sorry for Charlotte. Every year she had become much more like Claire. Her golden hair was now brown and shining. She was wearing dresses, but that was only cause of her sisters was doing the same. She was a small Claire, and she was all Tess needed right at the moment. " I always wanted to do the best for Charlotte and now I think that she maybe has to… move back to Drover's. She was born there, and now I've realized that she is her mums daughter and she should grow up in the country!"
"Come on Tess, we have to go to the party!" Tess just shook her head at Stevie. "There are three reasons that I'm not going: Nick, no cloths, and my big belly!" Stevie just laughed at her. "You know what? I've got a little idea in my head. First we need to find some cloths that will remind him about how many things you two have been through"
Tess entered the Gungellan pub together with Stevie. She was wearing a black dress. She haven't seen that dress for about six years. Last time she saw it was on Claire when she was pregnant. Around her neck was a necklace with a ring. The ring that was put on her finger more than five years ago. It was her engagement ring. They found a table in the corner. Suddenly Tess' eyes saw something in the other end. There was Dave sitting together with Kate, but when he got eye contact with her, he smiled. "Tess look!" said Stevie and pointed at a table close to the karaoke. There was Alex and Nick Ryan sitting with a bear. Without Tess noticed it she was standing with a microphone in her hand and the music begun to play. First she didn't sing but then she saw Nick's shining eyes. They were saying something. And then he words flew out of her mouth:
I've
been trying to break down your walls
But I don't know how to get
through
You say that you want me
You say that you need me
But
baby, I need more from you
You've gotta take my hand
And
lead me to where you are
You know I'll follow
To show me the
way to your heart
I know it's hard for you to trust again
But
you've just got to believe
I will never lie to you
And I will
never hurt you
Baby, I'm asking please
You've gotta take my
hand
And lead me to where you are
You know I'll follow
To
show me the way to your heart
Think you've locked your heart
away
Baby, I hold the key
Believe me when I say
My love can
set you free
Take my hand
And lead me to where you are
You
know I'll follow
To show me the way to your heart
Take my hand
And lead me to where you are
Baby, you know I'll follow
To
show me the way to your heart
The wind made her hair move. She was breathing gently and enjoying every moment. She was sitting outside and she could hear the music playing inside. She could hear the dancing people's feet on the dance floor. Sometimes somebody was singing a song, but it wasn't that often. The night had come and was now all around her. Soon another day would come, and the sun would rise again. What would a new day bring? She didn't knew, the only thing she knew was what had happened while she was singing.
Somebody began to laugh, but she didn't care. The only thing she was looking at was him, Nick Ryan, her husband. She tried to get eye contact with him and finally she made it. She tried to smile and she made it. He was just staring at her shining eyes. The eyes he once fell in love with and still loved so deeply. Then she felt somebody else's eyes on her back. She turned around and faced Dave. He gave her a big grin but she just shook her head at him. She hoped more than she ever had hoped for something before that he would forget all about the kiss and move on. Actually it looked like he got it. He nodded back, then turned his face to Kate and took her hand. Then he leaned over the table and kissed her gently. It came as a little shock for Tess, but she felt better than she had the last few days. Then she looked at Nick again and nodded in the direction where Dave and Kate were sitting. He saw them and smiled at Tess.
What was their love? Was it strong enough to survive this mess? Was it strong enough to stand every problem? Until now she hadn't seen it, but now she saw it. She saw the wall between them. It had been standing for five years now without she had noticed anything. The first stone was placed not long after she had arrived. It was placed by Liz Ryan, his mother. She had never wanted them so get together. Why, Tess had never understood. Then Tess had placed a couple herself. She had pulled back, and then another stone was placed by Sally Clements. And more by Dave Brewer. In that way the wall had been build bigger and stronger. It would be very hard to break down. But she knew deep inside that if they worked together it wouldn't be any problem. But there was a problem: He probably didn't trusted her anymore. Maybe he would sign the divorce papers tomorrow, or maybe he already had? With all her heart she wished he hadn't. Maybe there would be some luck and light in the end of this black tunnel?
Something interrupter her thought. Footsteps behind her and then somebody sat down beside her. She didn't turn to see who it was. Right now she didn't care about anything. She just wanted to be happy again! "Our life together could be a very interesting story. The first chapter should be called something like "The meeting" and then to today. Last chapter should end with one big question: Is this the end or shall we give it another try?" Tess gasped, but then she got her moves under control again. She was not looking for and answer just for the right way to say it. But then suddenly something returned to her head. Something that had been forgotten for so long time. Words that had been hidden. They were now clear as it was yesterday she had heard them. "You have to keep your promises. Be honest and trustful.. No drought, no famine, no sickness will break this bond, until we part in death and join together as one with the land. That was what you spoke, and then I gave you my word: For you there is no more rain, for I will be your shelter. For you there is no more pain, for I will be your comfort. For you there is no cold, for I am your warmth. And that's the absolutely truth, that's all I want to be. But if you aren't able to forgive me, then… I don't know. I can't be strong anymore! All I need is someone to take care of me and help into a new direction!" Tears came again. But this time it was the biggest tears and those with most pain in. But then she felt arms rapped around her. There she was sitting for a very long time, just letting her tears leave her eyes. A pair of hands took her face. She let it happen. Their lips met in a soft kiss, and then slowly the wall between them began to fall. Slowly, but she noticed it. She felt something she hadn't felt ever in their relationship. She dried her eyes and placed her head on his shoulder. He was just holding her in his arms until she decided to pull away. She smiled through her tears, then leaned over and kissed him.
As they entered the pub together Stevie noticed it right at the moment. It was like a light was shining from them. They were made for each other, no doubt. Alex noticed it too. When he saw them so happy together he felt like something was missing by his side. The smiling face he had loved with all his heart. But this thought made it even more worse. To remember something so beautiful that he would never see again. But he was wrong. In front of him he saw the beautiful eyes and the amazing smile. He tried to take her hand, but he couldn't. There she was, standing in front of him. So close but still that far away. He wanted her to be by his side for ever like she always had been there. Deep in his heart he knew it was impossible, but in the time she had been gone he had hoped that she one day would return with a big smile. He was still staring at her, when she placed a hand on his shoulder and whispered: "Don't give up, I'm still here, inside you, inside your heart. Don't forget me!" She smiled, and then… she was gone. But Alex was still looking at the place she had been standing. " I promise you I wont, I wont"
"What? Alex are you alright?" Alex shook his head and saw Stevie sitting on a chair with a bear in her hand. "Nothing"
She kissed the little girl's forehead. She was now two months old and she couldn't be more perfect than she was. The last past months had been perfect. There was nothing anymore that could come between them. Sally had called once to apologise and everybody was happy again. Life couldn't be better!
The end!
