Chapter 17: Saving Private Leechball


Reviews:

TaitanoRules555: Thanks.

QueenAzulaThinksYourWorthless: I wouldn't say he was complete dead weight, at least in a strategic sense. Still, he made a better scapegoat than ally for Alejandro after Gwen's elimination.

Gucci Mane LaFlare: Thanks.

Knifez: On the contrary, in TDA, Beth's retainer was a running gag for how disgusting it was. Beth probably couldn't match Owen or Shawn for amount of gross stuff eaten, but actual grossness level isn't a problem for her. Thanks, and I do update fairly quickly.

Phenomenal Ultra Instinct: Justin wasn't likely to get much further than this. Aiden is indeed in danger. As for the 'big bad' and 'great good,' why can't those positions be fluid?

DSX62415: Poor Mike. :(

insertnamehere21: Beth can handle really gross food, just not huge amounts of it. And don't worry, I have no plans to ship the two of them.

Omni Spectator: Glad you liked it. I do think Mal's potential was mostly wasted in canon, and his longevity here is not guaranteed. While the idols do complicate things, I will spoil just a bit: at least one of the three immunity idols will be used by a protagonist, rather than an antagonist.

Dark mage: It won't be long. And Izzy stabbing Scarlett is unlikely.


Teams:

Gophers: B, Beardo, Beth, Brick, Duncan, Heather, Jasmine, Sammy

Bass: Courtney, DJ, Lindsay, Mike, Sam, Scarlett, Scott, Topher, Tyler

Moose: Aiden, Cameron, Cody, Harold, Leshawna, Lightning, Noah, Owen, Shawn

Badgers: Alejandro, Bridgette, Geoff, Katie, Sadie, Sierra, Sky, Trent, Zoey


The episode opened on the dock as the Gophers returned from their spa trip. "Oh em gee, that was such an awesome trip!" Sammy squealed.

"Worst part of it was that we have to return to this dump," Duncan said.

"I even got my braces removed!" Beth squealed, her braces noticeably absent. "My mouth hasn't felt this good in forever!"

"I can't even remember the last time my feet were actually clean," Brick said, looking at his boots.

"And my hair is cleaner than it's ever been," Beardo added, running his fingers through his afro. "Do you think it would look better tied back, like, in a ponytail? Or would that be hipster-ific?"

"Hipster-ific," Jasmine answered. "Anyway, good work, Beth. I think that break was what we all needed."

"I'll say," replied Heather. She gave Beth a thumbs-up.


Confessional: Heather

"And now, back to idol hunting. I've already missed two days of it, so we need to catch up."

End confessional


Scarlett, Topher, and Mike were searching through the woods. "...And none of the other actors even projected, so no one in the back of the theater could even hear them!" Topher said to Mike, finishing up a story. "Thank goodness I don't go to that school anymore, because that drama club was a nightmare."

"I didn't know you did stage acting," Mike said.

"I'm not as serious about it as you, but it's good practice for a career in TV," Topher replied. "So, what got you into Broadway?"

"Well, after...a rather dark point in my life, my counselor gave me a ticket to see Les Miserables for my birthday. And I fell in love. I loved the story so much that I wanted nothing more than to be on that stage. I started taking acting classes, and singing lessons. I performed in plays, and I watched Broadway shows whenever I could. I've seen so many, but Les Miserables has always been my favorite." Mike told Topher. "What got you into hosting shows?"

"Well, my dad..." Topher began, but was cut off by Scarlett. "I hate to interrupt your life story, I'm sure it's quite fascinating. However, we are searching for the immunity idols at the moment. You can socialize later."

Mike thought for a moment. "Maybe Manitoba could help. Do you still have that fedora?"

Scarlett handed him the fedora, and he put it on. "Mr. Smith? Is that you?" Scarlett asked.

Mike shook his head. "Nope, still me. Funny, that usually brings him out. I don't know why it wouldn't."

Topher looked at him. "Does that mean the other three aren't coming out either?"

Mike frowned. He then took off his shirt. "Vito?" He kicked a boulder and stubbed his toe. "Chester? What's going on? This hasn't happened since..." He then started heading back to camp.

"Where are you going?" Scarlett asked.

"Back to camp. There's something I need to do," replied Mike.


When Mike got back to camp, he headed immediately for the dumpster behind the Mess Hall. He reached underneath it and pulled out the cursed tiki doll. He then speed walked to the confessional.


Confessional: Mike

"Okay, I'm beginning to get worried. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but in case I'm not, there's something I need to tell the producers. There's...something I haven't actually told anyone."

He took a deep breath, then tried to be as calm as possible as he spoke. "I...have a fifth alternate personality. Technically, he was my first alter. He was formed when I was twelve, after I was injured in a car wreck. His name was...is Mal.

"I survived the wreck with just a concussion and a few broken bones, but my little sister died. She and I were close, and I'm still not sure whether it was my injuries or hearing that she had died that gave me MPD.

"Originally, he was like a protector. But over time, he seemed to decide that the only way to keep me safe was for him to have full control, both over me and his surroundings. He saw monsters everywhere, until he became one. He eventually suppressed me and my other personalities so he could be in control, and it took an entire year for me to get enough control back to suppress him."

Mike then began to panic. "Chris, producers, if Mal has come back, you need to get me off this island and into a mental institution! If he's back and you don't, it's only a matter of time before he decides to kill everyone here! You have to...no! NO!"

He bent over and clutched his head, as if in severe pain, then straightened and revealed that his hair was once again covering his eye. "I'm ba-ack!"

End confessional


Mal exited the confessional, then swept his hair up to imitate Mike's hairstyle. Topher and Scarlett then walked up to him.

"What happened? You left in a hurry," Topher said.

"Oh, I...had to use the bathroom," "Mike" said.

"What's that in your hand?" Scarlett asked.

"Oh, uh, a souvenir...from when I went to Hawaii," he said, and held up the Boney Island statue. "I carry it around for luck."

"Ah," Scarlett nodded. "Well, it's nearly lunch time. We can take a break to eat, then we should get back to searching."


Confessional: Scarlett

"I know that wasn't true. The tiki statuette Mike had was clearly not of Hawaiian design. But honestly, I don't care where it came from. It is irrelevant to the competition and therefore irrelevant to me." She frowned. "Still, Mike's unusual behavior could be significant. I'll have to talk to him."

End confessional


In the Mess Hall, the Moose team was eating lunch. Lightning was telling a football story, oblivious to the fact that only Owen was listening. Shawn and Cameron were discussing the best ways to survive a zombie apocalypse. Cody and Harold were discussing a video game, Noah was reading a book, and Aiden was eating in silence. Chef walked out of the kitchen holding a plate of food, and was about to place it in front of Leshawna, when he saw something in the food. He pulled a folded piece of paper out of it, unfolded it, and read it. His eyes popped briefly, then he handed it to Leshawna, who read it and blushed. The camera shifted to show that Harold was intently watching Leshawna's reaction.


Confessional: Harold

"I've been discretely giving Leshawna love notes now and then ever since Jo's elimination. I haven't signed them, though, so she doesn't know they're from me. I know she likes them, but I'm nervous to tell her that they're from me because...well, I know I'm awesome, but girls don't really seem to see it that way."

End confessional


Not too much time later, Chris had assembled the campers at the campfire pit. "Today's challenge is a time-honored classic!" he announced. "Paintball!"

Duncan looked at him sidelong. "Didn't we already do this challenge?"

"No, that was laser tag," Chris said. "And it was a Capture the Flag challenge. This is purely a last-team-standing sort of challenge."

Duncan replied, "Still seems like you're reusing ideas. You'd think you wouldn't have to do that in the first season, but—"

"Moving on!" Chris shouted. "Now, just to make things more interesting, instead of paintballs, you'll be using leeches!" This elicited some rather adverse reactions from the campers.

"Fitting that you would want to put your family in the show," Noah commented. Owen laughed at his barb. Chris frowned at him.

The interns handed out paintball guns, high-quality ones for the Gophers, more basic ones for the other three teams. "As a reward for winning the last challenge, the Gophers get automatic weapons," Chris explained. They also handed out a few buckets of leeches to use as ammunition.

"Oh, look at them! Aren't they cute?" Sierra said, holding up a leech.

"You would think so, considering that you're practically one of them," Topher said.

Sierra spoke to the leech as one would speak to a baby. "Aww, don't listen to Topher, he's just a big meanie."

Cody had taken a few steps toward Sierra before the leeches were handed out, but upon seeing this, he returned to his team.


Confessional: Cody

"Okay, I was going to try to flirt with her, but on second thought...nah. I'd rather not be in a relationship with someone that unstable."

End confessional


Chris then handed out four maps, one to each team. "Here are your starting locations. Let's move!"


At the Gophers' starting location, the team saw a cannon. "Looks like Chris decided to give us a secret weapon," Beardo commented.

"I'll take the cannon!" both Heather and Duncan called. They then looked at each other angrily. "No, I'll take the cannon!"

"We use it as a team, right?" Brick asked Jasmine.

Jasmine looked thoughtfully at it. "We should leave the cannon. It's too slow to be useful, and it'll just force us to stick together, which I don't recommend doing. I think it would be best if we split up. We'll make less noise, won't be as easy to spot, and won't be as likely to get distracted if we do."

Duncan looked sadly at the cannon. "Man, I really wanted to fire this thing. Oh well." With that, the Gophers started walking in separate directions.

Brick walked up to Sammy. "Is it okay if I go with you? I'd feel better out there if I had someone watching my back."

Sammy thought for a moment. "Okay, as long as we don't make noise or get distracted."


At the Bass starting point, the team took a moment to strategize. "So, smart girl, do we stick together or split up?" Scott asked Scarlett.

Scarlett thought for a moment. "Both have their advantages. We can move faster and cover more ground if we split up, but a group can defend itself more easily than an individual."

DJ ventured, "So...pairs?"

Scarlett shrugged. "Pairs could be efficient. However, we have an odd number of persons on this team."

"Mike" put his hand to his chin. "Can I see that fedora again, Scarlett?"

Scarlett handed the fedora to him, and he put it on. Underneath the hat, his hair slicked back, and his eyes narrowed. "G'day, mates! What're we doing?"

Topher looked at him. "I thought Mike's personalities weren't coming out."

"Manitoba" shrugged. "Just a fluke, mate. Guess Mike just needed some lunch."

Scarlett shrugged. "We're playing leech paintball."


Confessional: Mal

"I have the abilities of all of Mike's personalities, so impersonating them is easy. Now I just have to ditch my so-called 'team,' then I can really start causing trouble."

End confessional


Mal, still pretending to be Manitoba, said, "Well, I'm off now. You just stay out of my way, mates." He then started walking away, only to be stopped by Scarlett. "Just a moment. We're working in pairs, and I want to go with you."

Mal shook his head. "You'd just slow me down, sheila."

Scarlett stared at him. "I have something I need to discuss with Mike. In private." As she spoke, she surreptitiously brushed her hand against the pocket containing the Boney Island statue.

Mal's eyes narrowed, and he pursed his lips. "Mike does like redheads." He paused for about a second. "Okay. But try to keep up."

DJ said, "Okay then. So, Lindsay and Tyler can go with me, Topher with Sam, and Scott with Courtney. Okay?"

The others agreed to this, and started splitting up.


At the Moose starting point, Cameron took a moment to try to strategize with his team. "I think we should split up into pairs for this challenge. Shawn...and he's already gone," he finished, as he saw the conspiracy theorist had already disappeared into the trees.

Cody shrugged. "He can handle himself."

Cameron nodded. "Probably. I was going to suggest we just let him go off on his own anyway. As for the rest of us, we should partner up."

Owen was the first to offer a suggestion. "Hey, Noah? Why don't we partner up? We made a pretty good team in the sled race."

Noah shrugged. "Fine with me." The two of them walked away in one direction.

Harold then asked Leshawna, "Would you like to partner up with me?"

Leshawna shrugged. "Sure." The two of them then walked in the opposite direction.


Confessional: Harold

"Yes! Now I can impress the lovely Leshawna with my paintball skills!"

End confessional


Cody looked at Cameron. "Let's go together. I don't think either of us could keep up with Lightning."

Lightning looked at him. "Sha-xactly." Then he looked at Aiden. "But I don't think you could either, skinny." Aiden simply shrugged and rolled his eyes.


At the Badgers' starting point, there wasn't much discussion. Sky simply suggested, "We should split up. We'll cover more ground, and be less noticeable."

Sadie didn't like this suggestion. "I can't go without Katie!"

Neither did Katie. "And I can't go without Sadie!"

Sky sighed in annoyance. "Fine. Just...you two go together, and the rest of us will split up."


Topher looked back at Sam, who was groaning and dragging his feet. "What's wrong?"

Sam replied, "Some jerkwad smashed all my video game consoles the night before last. I haven't played a video game in thirty-nine hours, forty-seven minutes, and fourteen seconds, and I'm going through withdrawl something fierce." He looked up at Topher, who looked pixelated. "You look...kinda strange right now."

Topher's eyes widened. "What? What's wrong? Is it my hair? I knew I should have used more hair gel, but I have to ration it! Otherwise, I'll run out, and I can't be on TV without hair gel!"

Sam shook his head. "No, it's not that."

Topher sighed in relief. "Thank goodness."

Sam continued, "It's just..." The camera showed his POV, with a crosshairs in the center of his vision, and a health bar and ammo counter at the bottom. "Heh. First person shooter. Groovy."

Topher gave him a weird look.


Katie and Sadie were walking through the forest. "It's, like, totally not fair what Justin did to Trent," Katie said.

"Totally not fair," Sadie agreed. She hesitated. "I mean, I'd still go out with him."

"Obviously!" Katie said. "He was the hottest guy on this island."

"Second hottest," Sadie corrected. "Alejandro was the hottest guy on the island. Still is."

"No, he wasn't," Katie disagreed. "Justin was the hottest, followed by Alejandro, Topher, Trent, Mike-" she was cut off by the two of them being shot with leeches.

Noah stepped out from the trees, followed by Owen. "And so the mutual destinies of the hunters and their quarries are fulfilled," Owen said.

"Maybe if you hadn't been so busy talking about boys, you would have noticed the ones about to shoot you," Noah said. Then he thought for a moment. "I hope no one ends up taking that line out of context."

"And Katie and Sadie are out!" Chris announced over the loudspeaker.


Trent was shaking as he tiptoed through the woods. He pulled a rabbit's foot out of his pocket, and tapped it against his forehead, counting the taps as he did so. "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine." He then heard a rustle of leaves a few feet away, and dashed toward it. He pointed his leechball gun at the source of the rustling, and was about to fire, when he saw that it was Bridgette. "Oh, sorry," he apologized. "Thought you were someone else."

"Well, I'm glad you didn't shoot me, then," she said.

"Yeah," Trent agreed. "Are you feeling a bit on edge from this challenge, or is it just me?"

"It's not that bad," Bridgette said.

Trent shrugged. "I guess. I'm just feeling kinda tense right now. Someone cut my guitar strings last night, and I don't know who did it."


Confessional: Mal

"My, my, my, haven't I been busy!"

End confessional


"If you're having trouble, maybe I should stick with you," Bridgette offered.

"I'd appreciate it," Trent replied.


After they had put some distance between themselves and their teammates, Scarlett addressed Mal. "Okay, we're alone now. Tell me the truth. You're not really Manitoba, are you?"

Mal looked at her. "Perceptive." He raised his fist. "You had better not tell anyone, or..."

Scarlett cut him off. "No worries. I have no intention of telling anyone. Your secret is safe with me. So, tell me, who are you really?"

Mal scowled. "I'm Mike's protector. You can call me Mal."

Scarlett asked, "Protector?"

Mal tapped his forehead. "He's safe and sound, right up here. And he will remain so, as long as I'm in control."

Scarlett shrugged. "Well, it's not like it matters to me. I just want to make sure we're still voting together."

Mal shrugged. "Sure. Now, we should part ways."


Confessional: Mal

"Yes, I'll vote with Scarlett at our next elimination to ensure a majority vote. But after that, it might serve my interests to get rid of her. Or it might not. I'll keep my options open."

End confessional


DJ, Lindsay, and Tyler were walking together, and DJ was talking. "So, I had Scott and Courtney pair up so they could get some one-on-one time. They're both fierce, ambitious, ruthlessly determined..."

"Aw, yeah, they'd be adorable together," Lindsay agreed. "Even though Scooter's clothes aren't adorable at all."

Tyler looked at him. "I don't know what 'ruthlessly' means. What does 'ruthlessly' mean?"

DJ answered, "Lacking compassion."

Tyler's eyes widened in realization. "Oh! Like Rocky Bleier!"

DJ nodded. "Exactly like Rocky Bleier."

Lindsay frowned. "Who's Rocket Bly?"

Tyler said, "Only one of the greatest football players ever!"

DJ said, "He made the deciding catch in the Super Bowl with shrapnel in his leg."

Tyler grinned. "My dad has every Super Bowl on DVD. That one was awesome."

Lindsay decided to change the subject. "Is there any girl here you like, DJ?"

DJ shook his head. "Nope, no girl."

"Do you have a girlfriend at home?"

DJ again said, "No, I don't. Hey, weren't we supposed to be hunting the other teams?"

Tyler said, "We can hunt and talk at the same time, right?"

Lindsay explained, "It means he doesn't want to talk about it."

Tyler asked, "Why not?"

Suddenly, a blast of leeches came from the bushes to the group's left. Amazingly, Tyler managed to be hit by all of them, and his two teammates returned fire. B dashed out from behind a tree, having been quick enough to avoid the leeches, and fired again. He fired an automatic stream at DJ and Lindsay, who returned fire. All of the shots hit their marks this time.

Over the loudspeaker, Chris announced, "And Tyler, DJ, Lindsay, and Beverly are out! I should probably warn you not to get distracted!"


Scott and Courtney were slinking along, clearly being much more careful than their teammates. "So, any luck with Topher?" Courtney asked quietly.

"I'm not sure," Scott conceded. "Topher is pretty good at not giving anything away. I think I planted some doubt in his mind, but I don't know whether he'll vote with us. I've discussed it with him a few times, but I can't afford to come on too strong."

"So, what you're saying is that we really need one of those immunity idols," Courtney ventured.

"Yeah, we need to search, and we need DJ and Sam to keep searching too. We've been lucky so far, but we can't avoid elimination forever."

Suddenly, the two of them heard the crunch of a pinecone being stepped on. Acting on instinct, they ducked in time to avoid being hit by a pair of leeches. They quickly found their attackers, took aim, and managed to hit their targets. "And Cody and Cameron are out!" came Chris's voice on the intercom.

Cody sagged his shoulders. "Dang, I really thought we had you." He then perked up and looked at Courtney. "But you can have me, if you want."

Courtney said, "No thanks. I'm actually into rugged, masculine guys, so I'll pass."

Cody returned to sagging his shoulders upon hearing this. "Like your friend?"

Courtney looked at Scott. She tilted her head slightly and gave a small nod when he wasn't looking.


Confessional: Courtney

"Yeah, I do think Scott is kinda hot. But I'm not telling him that. He likes messing with people."

End confessional


Lightning was running through the woods. He eventually had to pause to let his teammate catch up with him. "Man, why you so sha-slow?"

Aiden responded as he caught his breath, "I am...an...intellectual...I...don't run..."

Lightning rolled his eyes. "Sha-duh, you don't! You gotta eat more protein!"


Confessional: Aiden

"Lightning's intelligence is comparable to that of the average cheeseburger."

End confessional


Suddenly, Lightning was hit by a leech. Another was fired at Aiden, but the "intellectual" dodged behind Lightning and used the football player as a shield against leeches. He fired at the source of leeches, which happened to be Geoff. After he hit the surfer, Chris announced, "Lightning and Geoff are out!"

"Did you sha-have to do that?" Lightning asked.

"Just helping us win," Aiden replied. Lightning huffed, but said nothing.


"What's with that counting thing you do?" Bridgette asked Trent.

"Oh, well, I have mild OCD, and it's just something I do when I'm scared or stressed." Trent replied.

"I don't think I've ever seen you do that before," Bridgette said.

"That's because I was always calm when Gwen was around," Trent replied. "And I didn't really participate in the trust challenge-thank you, by the way-and the last challenge wasn't a really stressful challenge, plus my guitar strings..."

Suddenly, Trent and Bridgette heard a voice from the other side of some bushes. They crept up to the bush, then fired over it. Then they saw that the voice had been Izzy's, and she had caught the leeches they had fired at her. "Oh, thanks for giving me lunch! I thought I was going to have to find something to eat myself," Izzy said.

Trent and Bridgette gave her weird looks. "O...kay," Trent responded nervously, not sure what to say.

"You look nervous. Here, have some milk," Izzy said as she offered Trent a glass of milk. The glass had clearly been stolen from the Mess Hall.

Trent took a sip, then looked at it. "Tastes funny."

Izzy frowned. "Really? I swear, it's impossible to find good quality bear milk nowadays."

Trent did a spit-take.


Confessional: Trent

"What is wrong with that girl?!" He tapped his rabbit's foot against his head. "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine."

End confessional


Sky was sneaking through the woods, when she happened to catch sight of Scarlett. Before Scarlett noticed her, she took aim and fired. The leech hit Scarlett before she could react.

However, before Sky or Scarlett could really acknowledge the attack, Mal dumped a bucket of leeches on Sky from the tree branches above her. As he did so, he whistled his signature tune.

"And Scarlett and Sky are out!" Chris announced. "Sheesh, Mike, overkill much?"


Topher and Sam were searching for someone to target when Sam caught sight of Alejandro. "Target acquired!" he shouted, and he chased after the charmer. Topher went to do the same, before seeing a flash of purple in the opposite direction. He ducked just in time to avoid a leech. He shouted, "Big mistake, Sierra!" Sierra started running in the opposite direction, and Topher ran after her, both occasionally taking shots at each other.


Noah and Owen were in a concealed position, within the leaves of a tree. They sighted Brick and Sammy only a short distance away from the tree, and Owen whispered, "Once more, the hunters prepare to conclude their hunt as all successful hunts end..." as the two of them took aim.

However, their cover was ruined by a loud fart from Owen, and both he and Noah quickly took their shots and fell out of the tree to avoid the leeches that flew at the tree in response.

In their haste to shoot first, Noah and Owen had both shot at the same target: Sammy. Brick saw the leeches flying towards her and shielded her with his body, causing the leeches to hit him instead. Before Noah and Owen could fire another shot, Sammy took them both out.

"And Brick, Owen, and Noah are out!" the host's voice announced.

"Thanks, but you really didn't have to do that," Sammy told Brick.

"Heh, it was...an instinctive reaction," Brick replied, rather awkwardly.


Confessional: Brick

"Don't get me wrong, I think Sammy is stronger than she looks, and I find that attractive. But I wish she'd let me do things for her." He rubbed his arm. "Maybe I should just tell her how I feel."

End confessional


Owen saluted Sammy, saying, "And thus the hunter is left with no choice but to acknowledge the superior hunter, as proven by the most pure and sacred ritual: the hunt."

Suddenly, a leech hit Sammy in the back. "Sorry!" came Zoey's voice.

"And Samey is out!" came the host's voice.

"And the superior hunter is felled by a surprise attack," Noah commented. "But is that not the way of the world?"


Heather grumbled as she slunk towards the Mess Hall. "Stupid forest. I've been out there for two hours, and nothing happened." She turned a corner and walked right into a leech from Leshawna.

"I thought someone might try to double back!" Harold exclaimed triumphantly.

"Okay, you were right," Leshawna admitted.

"And Heather is out!" Chris announced.

"Whatever, I'm going to get something to eat," Heather said bitterly.


Topher pursued Sierra all the way to the base of the mountain. Upon reaching the mountain, Sierra saw that there was nowhere else to run. Topher caught up about a second later, and fired a leech at her. She dodged, at hit him with a shot of her own, right in the hairline.

"Not the hair!" Topher screamed, and pulled the leech out of his hair. Sierra chuckled at his misery.

However, her mirth was short-lived, as a rapid-fire stream of leeches hit her, with accompanying machine gun sound effects, both courtesy of Beardo.

"Heh heh, they feel like kisses," Sierra said. Beardo and Topher both cringed.

"And Topher and Sierra are both out!" Chris announced. "Remember: Pay attention to your surroundings."


As she and Scott hunted, Courtney's eye was drawn to a flash of gold between the branches of a fallen tree. "Is that..." she ventured, both her and Scott watching intensely as she knelt near the source and pulled out...a gold hoop earring. Too late, they realized they had been tricked, and both were hit by leeches.

"Boo-yah!" Harold shouted as the camera turned to reveal him and Leshawna behind the two Bass members. Leshawna took back her earring from Courtney.

"Okay, I have to admit, that was clever," Courtney conceded.

However, the celebration was short-lived, as Alejandro burst forth from the trees. He saw the four others, and managed to get one shot off at Leshawna before Harold hit him too. Then Sam burst out from the same direction and shot Harold in the midsection. "Enemies defeated! Initiate taunt dance!" Sam said, and he started doing the Macarena. The five other players watched in amazement, cringing as they did so.

"And Scott, Courtney, Harold, Leshawna, and Alejandro are out!" Chris announced. Then he added, "Sam, please stop dancing."


Confessional: Scott

"You bet your sweet life I'm going to bring that up when I get the chance."

End confessional


Beth was trying her best to be stealthy, when she saw Trent and Bridgette. Before they saw her, she ambushed them, shooting them both. However, her excitement was short-lived, as she was taken out by a shot from Shawn not a second later.

"And Bridgette, Trent, and Beth are out!" Chris announced. "Looks like we're down to our last seven people." After a short pause, he amended, "Eight people. Sorry, I miscounted."


A few minutes later, Beardo was hit by a shot from Shawn. Upon realizing what had happened, he started making a loud alarm noise. Shawn ignored him, and the loudspeaker announcing Beardo's elimination from the challenge, as he searched for the remaining campers. Near the base of the mountain, he saw Jasmine's hat poking up from behind a boulder. He stealthily made his way around to get a clear shot...

Only to discover that it was just the hat, on top of a smaller rock on top of a slightly shorter boulder behind the first. He realized it was a trap, but not in time to avoid the leeches Jasmine fired at him.

"Gotcha!" Jasmine said, as Shawn was hit by the leeches.

"And Shawn is out!" announced the host.

"Okay, that was smart," Shawn admitted. He then started pulling the leeches off of him. "Gross. They're like tiny, squirming, blood-sucking zombies. Or vampires, I guess."

"You really don't like zombies, do you?" Jasmine asked.

"Nope! Ever since I found out about them, they've been my mortal enemy. Or immortal enemy, given that they're already dead," Shawn amended as he removed the last of the leeches.

"Well, I'd better be off," Jasmine said. "Good luck avoiding the zombies."


Confessional: Shawn

"Jasmine seems pretty cool. Too bad she's not on my team, she seems like she could be helpful in a zombie apocalypse. No offense, but my teammates would mostly be doomed if the horde came for them."

End confessional


Aiden saw Mal, still disguised as Manitoba, a moderate distance away. He scowled, and muttered to himself, "How hard is it to get rid of one re[bleep]? I swear, if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself." He started following the MPD theater nerd.


Duncan had spent a long time searching, but hadn't run into anyone. Eventually, he just decided to return to the clearing that served as the Gophers' starting point, that where the cannon was still sitting. He walked over to the cannon, but before he could touch it, he was hit by a leech. "And Duncan is out!" came Chris's voice.

Mal, disguised as Manitoba, walked up to him. "G'day, mate," he said. "I'll be taking this."

"It'll just slow you down," Duncan said.

"I'll be the judge of that," Mal replied. "You can go and rack off." Duncan rolled his eyes and started walking away.

Suddenly, a leech flew towards Mal, who dodged it. He returned fire with his gun. The camera followed the leech, which Aiden managed to dodge. However, he caught his foot on a tree root and tripped, dropping his gun. It fell into the clearing.

And then Aiden made his big mistake. He should have left the gun and ran, and tried to outlast the others. Instead, he tried to retrieve his gun, in order to try to shoot Mal. Mal aimed the cannon at him, whistled his signature tune, and fired.

The camera turned to Duncan, who froze, eyes wide.


Confessional: Duncan

"That's the tune Mal would always whistle! I thought I knew Mike from somewhere, but I didn't realize...I have to warn his teammates!"

End confessional


The camera shifted to Sam and Zoey pointing their weapons at each other, when Chris announced, "And Aiden is out! So, because this challenge has gone on long enough, with two players remaining, the Bass win!"

"Yes! Victory!" shouted Sam. "Taunt dance!" Then he started doing the Macarena again.


Confessional: Aiden

"Well, that could have gone better. But if we have to go to elimination anyway, there is someone I want gone." He started writing, with his right hand. "Everyone on my team, with one exception, has a weakness I can exploit. I can deal with the nerds, Lightning, Owen, and Shawn. Leshawna, however, is a real threat. She has a strong social game, she's good in challenges, and she's smart, at least in comparison to most of the morons on my team and in the game in general. I think it's best if she goes home tonight."

End confessional


The first member of the Bass Duncan saw when he returned to camp was Scarlett. "Hey, I need to talk to you," he said to her, frantic. "Mike...I know him. Actually, I know an alternate personality of his. His name is Mal, and he was in juvie with me. He's very dangerous, and I think he's in control. You have to be careful with him, he's really bad news. If you don't get rid of him soon, he could hurt a lot of people really badly."

Scarlett gave him a skeptical look. "If you're going to make a transparent attempt to get rid of someone you consider a threat, choose a more believable lie."

"But I'm not lying!" Duncan said desperately, but Scarlett was already walking away. He saw Topher, and then the same thing to him.

"Well, that's not good," Topher said. "I mean, I believe you, but...we didn't lose. We can't get rid of Mike." He thought for a moment. "Perhaps you should go to Chris and Chef with this information. If Mal is in control, they probably know, but maybe they don't know just how bad Mal is. Perhaps you should tell them. I'll talk to my teammates."

"Good idea," Duncan said, and he ran off.

Topher then found Scott, and told him, "Okay, I'll vote with you when we next lose, but only if we vote for Mike."

Scott didn't ask why. "Deal," he said.


Confessional: Scott

"I don't know why Topher wants Mike gone, but as long as it means taking power away from Scarlett, I don't care. I'm not picky when it comes to gifts. Or anything, really. Except girls. I am picky about girls."

End confessional


The nerd alliance was convening near the boathouse. "I found this on my bed," Cameron showed them a note. "I found this on my bed. It says to vote for Leshawna."

Harold frowned at this. "Something wrong?" Cameron asked.

Harold said, "Well...I don't really wanna vote out Leshawna. I...kinda have a crush on her. I've even been writing love notes to her."

Noah said, "Well, voting for her does seem like the smart choice..." he trailed off.

Harold made a pleading face. "Gosh, come on, guys. Can't we vote out someone other than Leshawna? I know I don't have much of a chance with her, but...don't you guys know the feeling of really liking someone, even if you don't really have a shot with them?"

Cody and Noah both looked away, and silence filled the air for a few seconds. Eventually, Cody spoke. "All right. We'll vote for someone other than Leshawna."

Cameron said, "Okay, I won't pretend to understand, but I can't say I like the idea of being blackmailed. We can vote for Aiden; he won't be missed, and I don't trust him."

Cody asked, "Has he ever said anything nice to anyone?"

Cameron then looked Harold in the eye. "But if we do, you have to tell Leshawna how you feel. I'm not going to let you pine all season. Also, if we're going to give our advantage of surprise away, I want Leshawna to join our alliance. I don't trust us against a tiebreaker."

Harold gave him a hug. "Thank you!" He then started walking off. Noah and Cody started to follow him, but Cameron caught their arms. He whispered to them, "But if and when it comes down to the five of us, Leshawna will be the first to go." The two of them nodded.

What none of them saw was Aiden eavesdropping on them.


Confessional: Aiden

"Love. What is it even good for?"

End confessional


Aiden searched around and found his unaligned teammates. "Okay, I need to talk to you," he told them. "Harold, Noah, Cody, and Cameron are in an alliance, and they're voting together. We need to get rid of one of them, while we still have a majority vote."

He surveyed the reactions of the four of them. Owen looked unsure, Lightning seemed like he was still trying to figure out what that implied, and Shawn and Leshawna clearly understood how much of a threat the alliance presented. "How do you know?" Leshawna asked.

"Remember when Eva was eliminated?" Aiden asked in response. "When everyone else's votes were divided between Noah and me, they voted out Eva. She was a big threat, so they got rid of her. We've got to vote out one of them tonight."

There was a short silence, until Shawn broke it. "Okay, I'll vote with you, but only if we vote out Noah or Cody."

"Why Noah or Cody?" Aiden asked. "Why not Harold or Cameron?"

"Cameron's the team strategist," Shawn explained, "and Harold is the best in challenges out of all of them. With Jo and Eva gone, we're kinda shorthanded."

Aiden huffed. "Fine. Cody or Noah?"

Lightning, Shawn, and Leshawna all shrugged, but Owen said, "Can we vote out Cody? I mean, they're both my friends, but I'd miss Noah more. He's hilarious."

Aiden shrugged. "It doesn't matter to me."


At the Campfire Ceremony, Chris said, "Congratulations on a day of great entertainment! Did you all have fun? I know I did."

Owen shouted, "I had fun!" The other campers stared at him oddly.

Chris continued, "I have on my plate eight marshmallows. Whoever does not receive a marshmallow..."

"Must walk the Dock of Shame, board the Boat of Losers, and leave, never to return. We get it, let's just get on with it," Noah cut him off, speaking quickly.

Chris glared at him. "Fine, marshmallows go to Shawn, Harold, Leshawna, Owen, Noah, Cameron, and Lightning.

"Cody, Aiden, this is the final marshmallow of the evening. The final marshmallow goes to..."

He paused, letting the tension build. The camera went back and forth between Cody and Aiden, both looking very nervous.

"Aiden."

The four members of the nerds' alliance gasped. "What?"

"Don't act so sha-shocked, dudes. Quiet Dude told us you guys are voting together," Lightning told them, rather bitterly.

Cameron then realized what was happening. "And did he also tell you that he's been blackmailing us?" He then handed the two notes to Leshawna, who read them, and her eyes widened upon reading the second one. "Oh no. Oh no, he didn't!" She handed the notes to Shawn, who read them and passed them to Owen, who read them and passed them to Lightning.

Aiden then realized his mistake. He belatedly tried to save himself. "No, that wasn't me! I received a note telling me about the alliance!"

Leshawna asked, "Then why didn't we? Prove it. Show us this note."

Aiden stammered, "I don't have it with me...it's in my bunk?"

Shawn said, "Okay, I'll go look for it. Right now."

Aiden desperately said, "I couldn't have written those notes! I'm left-handed! Those notes were written by a right-handed person!"

Leshawna wasn't buying it. "This handwriting is awful. It could have been written by someone writing with their weak hand, and it probably was."

Chris grinned. "Pretty eventful day, huh?" He then looked at Cody. "Time to go, dude."

Cody glared at Aiden. Then he turned to his alliance members. "Give 'em heck for me, okay?" He then walked down the Dock of Shame, onto the Boat of Losers, which sped away with him on it.

Chris looked at the campers. "The rest of you are safe."

He then made eye contact with Aiden. "For tonight." Aiden blanched.


After the Campfire Ceremony, Harold went to talk to Leshawna. "Hey, could I talk to you for a second?"

"Yeah, I'll vote out Mr. Note Writer next time we lose. No one tries to get rid of me and gets away with it," Leshawna replied.

"No, it's not about that," Harold said. "Well, it's a little bit related to that, but that's not the main point."

"Then what do you want to talk to me about?"

Harold took another note out of his pocket. "I wrote this for you," he said.

She took it and read it, and her jaw dropped slightly. "So, the guy sending me those love notes..."

Harold nodded his head. "It was me. That was the reason we didn't vote you out tonight."

He looked at her. "I know I'm not really every woman's dream guy, and I'd understand if you don't like me like that..."

Leshawna looked at him. "You kidding?" She gestured at the note. "You're willin' to do what's best for your girl, even if it's not what's best for you. And you're good with words. Do you have any idea how rare both of those things are? Leshawna likes."

Harold's eyes widened. "Really?"

Leshawna said, "I'll go out with you. But we're gonna take it slow. Don't wanna rush into a relationship only to realize we have nothin' in common."

Harold nodded his head. "Of course! I can go as slow as you want!"

He then remembered something. "Oh, right. Cameron wanted me to ask you if you wanna be part of our alliance."

Leshawna nodded. "Yeah, that's a good idea."


Confessional: Harold

"God, I don't know if you exist, but if you do, thank you so much!"

Confessional: Leshawna

"Yeah, Harold ain't no supermodel, but I don't put too much stock in looks. From what I've seen, he seems like he knows how to treat a girl, and that's what's really important."

Confessional: Chef

"Harold and Leshawna? I'm as surprised as you. But you didn't read the notes. Heh heh heh."

End confessional


Whew! Was not expecting this to be my longest chapter! I'm not sure exactly how well this elimination will be received. On the one hand, Cody is a fan favorite, and if my reviews are anything to go by, he was well-liked as a comic relief in this story. On the other hand, Aiden's position has reached critical condition, and I know how you all hate him.

My thoughts on Cody? I don't like him very much, honestly. I know he's a fan favorite, and he wouldn't be the only fan favorite character that I don't like. I've said a few times that I don't like Courtney, after all. But while I get why people love Courtney so much, I don't know why Cody is so popular. Here's an edited Todd in the Shadows quote that I think describes Cody perfectly:

"In fact, [Cody] was a particular breed of dork: the frat dork. This guy [picture of Leonard] is also a total dork, but he owns it. He's happy, doing what he's doing. But the frat dork can never truly embrace his dork-dom, instead chasing an image of cool that he will never have the charisma to achieve. This is infinitely lamer than the cosplayer."

Yep, that about sums it up. I also don't really get why he's shipped with absolutely everyone, especially because I don't think he actually wants a girlfriend for any reason other than the status level a relationship would grant him. In my opinion, the only reason he even chased Gwen so much was because he perceived her as the most "cool" girl on Total Drama, and he envied her that. While Candy For Your Thoughts? is a masterpiece, I rarely, if ever, really like Cody outside of that one story, and it didn't help that I couldn't think of a good plot for him.

I still need challenge ideas. PM me if you have some.

Elimination order:

52: Dave, the Germaphobe

51: Staci, the Compulsive Liar

50: Dakota, the Fame-Monger

49: Sugar, the Pageant Queen

48: Amy, the Evil Twin

47: Leonard, the LARPer

46: Anne Maria, the Jersey Shore Reject

45: Izzy, the Psycho Hose Beast (still out there?)

44: Rodney, the Lovesick Farm Boy

43: Max, the Super-Villain Wannabe

42: Jo, the Take-No-Prisoners Jockette

41: Ezekiel, the Homeschooled Guy

38 (Tie): Gwen, the Loner

38 (Tie): Dawn, the Moonchild

38 (Tie): Eva, the Hothead

37: Ella, the Fairytale Princess

36: Justin, the Eye Candy

35: Cody, the Flirty Geek