Love Is Forever
Disclaimer : Sadly, Magik does not own Remmy, Siri, or Nymphie. She would be living in Europe if she did.
-Flashback-
"So. What have we learned?" asked Remus Lupin in a rather bored tone, running his gaze over the few occupants of his free period tutoring session. Only one hand raised among them, belonging to a young boy with long, blue-black hair.
"Sirius?" asked Remus wryly.
"I love you." Sirius announced promptly, as though this were the most obvious and natural thing in the world. The class shared splattered laughter, and Sirius smirked slyly and winked at Remus.
Outside, the bell gave a shrill ring, and Remus turned a faint shade of crimson as he dismissed the class.
Sirius met his tawny-haired boyfriend outside, beaming as though supremely proud of himself. Remus shook his head as students thundered up and down the long corridor. Before Remus could protest, he found himself being tugged against the current of other students by his robe sleeve.
"Sirius!" Remus tried to yell. "I have Potions!"
His objections were all in vain, however, as Sirius tugged him unceremoniously down the nearest side corridor and out of sight.
"Sirius -" Remus's half-hearted complaint was interrupted by the taller boy's fiery kisses, drowning Remus in a sea of pleasant sensations. All thoughts of Potion flew his mind momentarily as Remus made pleased noises and backed against the corridor wall. The late bell drummed sharply into their loving kisses and caresses, and Remus reluctantly returned to reality.
"I have Potions," Remus murmured into Sirius's mouth. But Sirius simply pinned the werewolf to the wall, kissed him again, and whispered "Not any more."
Remus silently agreed, and so they stayed, pressed against the corridor wall for some time - Professor Slughorn saw neither of them that day.
-end Flashback-
The same tawny-haired lycanthrope sat thoughtfully at #12, Grimmauld Place's kitchen table. He traced the letter 'S' unconsciously in the accumulated dust, over and over. S for Sirius Black - S for his lover. Remus tried not to think 'his dead lover'.
Sometimes, Remus thought he could still taste their kisses. Tinged faintly with honey, chocolate, and occasionally firewhiskey. Sometimes, he couldn't help thinking of his grey-eyed boyfriend, though the mere memory taunted him. Ever since the Veil, the thought of Sirius Black made Remus's heart seizure, his blood run cold.
Remus had broke down completely at first - still did, at times. Memories of Sirius were both torture and joy. It was a chance to escape to a world where Sirius was still there, his barklike laugh and his mischievous grin. But the fantasy still couldn't relate to the real thing - the feelings that Remus missed dearly.
A dry sob wracked Remus's pale form as he remembered…
-Flashback-
"Remussss," Sirius whined slightly, sinking onto the couch beside the werewolf with a wry smile. He looked almost…devious. Remus started in surprise, turning amber eyes on grey-blue ('like the sea', he'd often said). The eyes of Sirius Black, the eyes of his secret crush. "Sirius?" he asked quietly.
Sirius leaned in slightly so that their foreheads were touching and Remus went slightly cross-eyed as fiery sensations raged through his body. Remus fought the undeniable urge to tackle the other boy and snog him into next week - next month, even.
There was no need.
"I love you," whispered the boy, and Remus's mind went numb and blank. All that mattered were those three simple words and the comforting feel of Sirius's lips against his own. "I love you too," Remus murmured between kisses. He sank back into the couch slightly, wrapped his arms around the boy, and kissed him again.
Life was good.
-end Flashback-
"Siri," mumbled Remus hopelessly. Silent tears streamed down his face as he trembled and shuddered with the force of the emotions. "Siri, love, why did you leave me here like this? I loved you.. God, I've always loved you, Sirius. I always will. I still remember curling up in your arms after the full moon, and everything hurt but it would all be alright because I had you there. .. Dumbledore keeps telling me to be strong. But how can I, when the one person who always made me strong is gone?"
Remus's voice faded into a faint whisper as tears fell endlessly. He never used to cry, with Sirius around. He'd always had to be the strong one.
Not now…
"Sirius," Remus's voice still cracked desperately. "You were my life. You were my strength and my fire. You're my crying shoulder - you've always been there, and I can't cope now that you suddenly aren't. I just keep thinking that you're going to walk through that door and take me in your arms and life will be normal again. It breaks my heart even more, knowing that can never happen again. Sirius.."
-Flashback-
"Remus, I have to go," pleaded Sirius. "For Harry. They could kill him, Remus. Please."
Amber eyes stared into blue-grey, sharing a look of deepest passion, love - and trust. Finally, the tawny-haired young man relented. 'All right. Just be careful, Siri. I love you."
"Forever, Remus," whispered Sirius reassuringly. "Love is forever." Taking the werewolves hands in his, he leaned in for a brief, but passionate kiss that said it all, I love you, I'll miss you, I promise I'll be back. Remus returned it with equal care, but his heart sunk when Sirius broke off. Had Remus known this kiss would be their last, he would've made it last forever - but he simply let Sirius pull away, flinging open the door.
"Love is forever." Sirius told him again, his voice a simple whisper.
And then he was gone.
-end Flashback-
Tears splashed onto the wooden surface of the table, leaving splotches in some of the carefully traced series of the letter S. His thoughts were disrupted by the creaking of the kitchen door, and Remus hurriedly dried his tears and looked up.
A young woman with a heart-shaped face and spiked, startlingly emerald hair edged in, as though she were afraid Remus might bite. "Remus, we found this while we were cleaning," Tonks told him quietly. "We… thought you might want to read it. It's a letter. Sirius's letter."
Remus fought back prickling tears as he accepted the parchment from Tonks - she left without saying another word, leaving Remus staring at the uniquely folded paper and wondering whether he had the strength to read it.
Remus unfolded the letter with trembling, fumbling hands.
The handwriting inside the letter was pleasantly familiar, and it filled Remus's heart with warmth simply to see the sharp, spindly letters again.
Remmy,
I felt like writing this was necessary, just in case, you know, I ever snuff it without warning. Though, of course, I'm hoping I won't. You know how it is.
Remus J. Lupin, I have never loved anyone more than I've loved you. All my life. First as a friend, then as a brother, now as my everything. You're my life - not only my lover, but my best friend as well. You're the flame in my heart that keeps me going. Never forget me, Remus. I know I never will - I guarentee you, right now, I'm thinking of you and laughing at our idiot pranks. Even through the supposed betrayal, you supported me - I never feel better than when I'm with you. I wake up every day just to realize that you're there with me, and you always will be.
You stole my heart, and I never want it back. If loving you is wrong, I never want to be right again. Let's be outlaws together, you and me, Remus. For all eternity. Forever and ever.
Love from the ever mental,
Sirius Black
Clutching the letter tightly to his chest like a lifeline, Remus raised his eyes to the blackened ceiling.
"I love you too, Sirius. Always." he whispered genuinely. "Love is forever."
