After returning to the school, Bill and Severina were taken immediately to the infirmary. Poppy tutted and tisked, saying they needed to be at St. Mungo's. Their condition was severe, more so than she was really able to handle on her own. Severus disagreed with her vehemently, saying they would be fine under her care. No one was carting his daughter off anywhere else for a very long time, if ever. He was not letting her from the castle without him either in a long while.
After seeing to the two of them, Severus ushered Remus and Harry out so they could get rest. The men had a hard time getting Harry pried from Severina, and they would not have had the young woman not insisted he go as well. The two men then saw Harry to Gryffindor tower, passing an upset Filch, who did not get the joy of getting Harry in trouble for being out and about since the professors were with them. Remus then saw Severus to his room, even if it was out of his way after leaving Gryffindor tower. He was concerned about the man after what had just happened to his daughter.
As they neared his door, Severus chose to speak. He had been meaning to since returning but things had been so hectic, and he had been fussing over Severina. "Are you alright?" He looked at the other man out of the corner of his eye. "You didn't speak with Harry after we got back."
Remus had spoken to Harry, a few words, but neither had spoken with the other as Severus meant. "I'm fine. He needs to think. I'm not going to push anything, especially after tonight." The boy had been through too much for one night to have to deal with Remus being his father.
"I believe we had some things to discuss," Severus changed the subject. He needed to distract Remus from his worries over his son. He would do so with things he was certain Remus was anxious, both eager and nervous, to continue from earlier in the night.
Remus smiled at him thinly as they came to a stop outside Severus' rooms. He was happy for the distraction but was still concerned about Harry. He was also worried about where their talk could go. Things had gone relatively well in the infirmary. He worried that something could now go wrong. they had to talk about the one thing he did not want to. The touchy subject of what he was.
"So," Severus broke the sudden silence. He wondered what was causing the man to hesitate suddenly. "Shall we?" He opened the door and motioned Remus in first. He watched the man not and walk passed him. He followed him in and got them both a drink. "Where should we begin?" He handed the drink over.
Remus took the drink with a small smile. "I'm not sure," he answered honestly. Well, almost honestly. He was not sure where he wanted to begin, perhaps where he should, but he knew what needed discussed most. "There is much we need to discuss."
As if sensing Remus' thoughts, Severus asked, "Where do you wish to being?" He sat down beside the other man and watched him closely. Remus seemed to be cloistering in on himself when he should be opening up. Being no fool, he was pretty sure what topic would be first, especially considering the behavior or the werewolf. Like Lupin, he was not sure how talking about it could effect him, them. He wanted to believe he could get passed it. He hoped he could. A feeling in his gut was almost certain he would.
"Well..." Remus hesitated. He had almost killed Severus once. Moony had nearly taken away the one person Remus cared for the most, save for his son. He eyed his drink as he swirled it lightly. He was saving it for when he knew he would need it most.
"Start from the beginning if that helps. No secrets. You may say or ask anything." Severus sat aside his own drink and placed his hand on Remus' arm in support. Acting this way was new to him but it felt natural. He wondered why he had never been like this with anyone before. Granted he had tried with Lily but... Something felt different with Remus. An ease with which he had not felt before.
Remus would not meet his eyes as he finally brought up the one thing he did not want to get between him, the one thing that would before anything else. "Moony is the touchiest subject. Perhaps that would be best."
"Alright," Severus accepted the topic easily. He knew he had to for both their sakes. He could see how much it worried Remus. "What do you want to say about him?" He asked softly. He wanted Remus to feel comfortable to speak about anything, especially anything to do with Moony.
Lupin took a deep, slow breath and let it out as slowly. "I know I have said many times I am sorry for that night." He hesitated slightly. "Severus, I have... had feelings for you since before then." He downed his drink in one go. "I used James because I knew you could never see me without seeing Moony after that night." He had lived in Moony's shadow, the shadow of what he was, for a majority of his life. The one person he wanted to accept him despite of it that did not do so without question was Severus Snape.
Severus knew what weighed on Remus the most. He squeezed the arm under his hand. "What's done is done. No more apologies. A long time ago I started to blame the person who was responsible. Black." He tightened his hold again. He saw a look pass over Remus as the man sighed and knew that Black was a touchy subject that Remus did not want to talk about. Severus damned the man for being such a fool as to leave his house. "You could not have controlled him then..." Moony was very strong willed, like his maker.
"No one could control Sirius," he spoke off handedly. It needed said. "Though, I know you speak of Moony. I couldn't control him now without your help." He gave him a grateful smile, covering Severus' hand with his own. Him brewing the wolfsbane for him meant a lot to Remus. He felt somewhat special, though he knew that was just the part of him that always fluttered around Severus.
"That help I will always give." He set aside his glass and used his free hand to stroke the side of Remus' face with a small smile, ignoring the voice in his head that was asking when he became such a pansy sap.
Remus looked at him with a light curiosity. "What of you, Sev? What do you wish to know about me?" He realized he had not really asked Severus anything though, in a way, he had asked him to accept Moony. Snape had done that openly by swearing his aid with the wolfsbane.
Snape did not have to think to come up with a question. He knew exactly what he wanted to know. "Why me?" He searched Remus' eyes. "I know how everyone else believes me to be." Remus moved his hand from Severus' hand to his chest, over his heart. The hand warmed him from the inside out from where it rested. He could not help but snort instead of giving a verbal answer. Remus was such an enigma. How could his heart be a reason? He did not want to discuss his heart or lack there of. "What do you want to do about this?" He changed the topic.
Remus did not let him detour from the subject. Snape had to face that he had a heart, had feelings. "You think you have no heart." He phrased it not as a question but a statement. He shook his head sadly.
"I think," he spoke softly without looking at Lupin, "it's turned to stone a long time ago." Though he had to admit to himself, in the deepest depths of his mind, that was not entirely true. Lily Evans, his daughter, this man beside him... They had found cracks in that stone. Cracks that led to a core soft and full of life.
Remus watched him, squeezing the hand on his arm after moving his hand back there again. "I see the way you look at your daughter, Severus," he informed him gently. "No stone could feel the way you do for her." He paused, choosing his next words carefully the subject touchy for him. "I saw the way you looked at her mother. I envied the way your heart shone in your eyes for her." He gave him a small smile, caressing his hand with his thumb. "The passion you have for your potions and even the dark arts... Severus, you have a healthy, lively heart." He looked deep into his eyes doing his best to make Severus realize this as true.
"And you want in," he said before Remus could say anything. He had never felt so flattered, so center of attention as when Remus spoke to him so, looked into his eyes so. But that still did not explain everything. After Remus' adamant 'Yes.' he had to ask, "Why do you want to give me a piece of your heart?" Ever set in his idiosyncrasies, he had to chew the bone to death.
Remus had realized it would be difficult to convince Snape, or at least get him to be open to a relationship, but rephrasing the same question was a bit much. He took a deep breath, more of a sigh, and jumped off a cliff. "I love you. Is that not reason enough?" He had already given that piece to Severus there was no wanting to. Severus had it, he just needed to accept it. He had no doubts that if Severus did not refuse to believe he could love him, he would at least still question why.
Not disappointing the werewolf, he asked, "How can you love me? You don't know me. Not really." They had, of course, known each other remotely for twenty-five years. Still, they hardly knew that much about the other. Perhaps the knew slightly more than others having been working together and of the same year in school. James and Sirius' obsession with bothering Severus helped a bit, and of course Remus' fascination from school on. "All you think you know is that I have a heart... passion."
Remus regarded him for a few moments. With Severus words may never work. He would have to show him. "I think you had asked what I want to do about something." He leaned in, his face just an inch or two from Snape's. "And I don't think. I know you have a heart and passion." His breath whispered over Severus' face.
Unable to resist the temptation, Snape leaned in the rest of the way and kissed Lupin. He was sure he knew where Remus was directing the conversation. The time for words was leaving them. Action, as it was said, spoke louder. "What do you want to do?" His breath feathered across Remus as Remus' had across him. He knew the question was needless.
Remus grinned wolfishly at him. "I would like to have that passion released." he ran his hands over Severus through his robes and clothes. His eyes looked into Snape's with a deep lust, need and want, laced with a passion, a love.
Severus played things coy, cool. He reached for the clasp of Remus' threadbare robes. He made a mental note to get him a new wardrobe whether he liked it or not. "Really?" His hand caressed Remus' chest lightly as he smiled slyly at the werewolf.
"Yes." Remus moaned and arched into the touch. The touch was so light, especially through his clothes, but it sent electricity all over his skin. "I want you to do what your passion tells you to do. Don't think, just feel. I am yours," and he made sure Severus was looking him in the eye, "to do with as you please."
"Severus shoved the robes from Remus. His pants were feeling much too tight. "It has been a long time." He hesitated, afraid to disappoint the man. That revelation thrilled and worried the potion's master. "I've never..." He looked down, still caressing Remus' chest without realizing.
Remus removed Snape's robes. "I'll guide you in any way you need." He ran his hands down Severus' shoulders.
Severus smiled. "Seems you again get to be a teacher." His fingers started up under the edge of Remus' top.
"I also get to be the test subject," he joked after giving Severus a kiss. He was merely trying to lightly the mood.
Severus pulled away slightly. "Test subject?" What was that suppose to mean?
Remus ran a thumb over Severus' frown. "Joke, Sev." He gave him a reassuring smile. "You need to calm down."
Snape took Lupin's hand and placed it where his pants were straining not to burst. "I don't think you're a test subject." He rubbed himself into Remus' hand.
Remus took control of his hand, massaging the firm length inside Severus' pants. "Gods, Sev. I want you." His voice was breathless. He pulled him in for another kiss, this one long and passionate. The kiss promised of everything to come.
