Silently Forgiving
It's a long silence between me and her, just staring at each other as if nothing is wrong with the world and that I'm just some stranger who is passing by and saying hi. She looked at me firmly, with that same look of utter defiance and strong will that seems to personify the Shiba family. I broke the silence first with words never rehearsed before. "Umm..." is all that escapes my mouth in front of such determination.
Her voice comes out rough and unrefined, but speaks to me like nothing is wrong, "What do you want?" She asks me, standing there. The look in her eyes only elevated by her missing arm that made her seem like she'd seen it all.
Ganju comes from nowhere, sweating bullets from whatever torture his sister is putting him through. Has he forgiven me? Or is he just acting so that I may leave quickly, maybe his anger is swelling deep inside him so badly that he can barely keep it inside him, "Wait! That's Rukia! Ichigo risked his life to save her!"
The elder of the Shiba family looked at me unforgivingly, her eyes transfixed on my pathetic form. Ichigo I heard him say, I know he risked his life to save me, but at what cost? My honor could of been saved had he just left me there. "I know." She continues firmly, her arm dangling freely in the wind.
The younger looked at the older with mystery, "The Shinigami that killed onii-san."
She looks upon me resolutely, an unwavering sheer determination unmoving from her stern glare, "That's why I'm asking, what do you want?" She says with so much indifference in her voice. She doesn't cry, she doesn't yell, she doesn't show any kind of emotion.
The words just come out of my mouth as I bow in honor, and of the life I took years ago, "…Sorry…" I say silently, but loud enough so that they could possibly hear it. "I wanted to apologize sooner, but I just ran like a coward. It took me so long to bring myself over here." I remember crying all night, remembering the loss I had given them, the grief I had given myself, and the hatred I brought onto myself.
"It's okay." She says steadfastly, turning around and scratching the back of her head, as if one sorry was enough.
"Huh?" I don't understand, why isn't her angry with me? Her inner soul must be fuming from what I have done. With that in mind, I only hear footsteps angrily coming my way, then her fist connects to the top of my head, "Ow!" I naturally say.
"I heard everything from Ukitake. How it wasn't you're fault, and how you're the one who's carrying around most of the guilt. That's why in my heart, I decided that I would forgive you if you said just one word of apology." A great burden was just lifted off my heart, that she knew my soul and what I had been going through. Just then it hit me, that I was carrying so much guilt on myself, I forgot to see that her own pain and sorrow became a pardon for me. Maybe that's what I forget to see, and why Ichigo wanted to save me. She silently forgave me, before she even met me. Kukaku Shiba.
