TWENTY ONE
Dec 2nd: 0730 hours
"What? Yes, I'm still holding. I've been holding for some time, now. Have you been able to patch a line through to Texas, yet? Well, why not?" Lieutenant MacAllister was sitting at the company clerk's desk. She had papers scattered across the desktop and was typing a report. She was also speaking on the phone.
Listening to the reply from the line operator, the woman asked in mock disbelief, "There's a war going on! Really? You're sitting in a building in Hawaii overlooking a white sandy beach while I'm over here in Korea, three miles from the front, slipping on ice patches and taking blood baths daily! And you're telling me there's a war going on! Fancy that."
"Why don't you just try that number again? No, I can't wait another twenty four hours. I have to get through, now! Listen you…all right...all right! I'll try again. In twenty four hours. Thanks, Corporal. You've been very helpful. 4077th, out." Angrily, slamming the phone set back onto its receiver, she let loose with an explosive outburst and dropped her head onto her arms.
"I don't recognize the language," Colonel Potter spoke from behind her, "but the words do not sound like anything you should be saying."
MacAllister whirled around in surprise, "Oh, sir, I'm sorry! I didn't know anyone was around. I apologize, sir." Her face was almost as red as her hair. "I do apologize, sir," she spoke with sincerity and hastily rubbed her hand across her eyes to remove any trace of tears.
"Come into my office, Lieutenant," he directed. "And sit down."
Closing the door, the commanding officer of the MASH unit returned to his desk. He observed the nurse who was sitting at attention before him. "Now, what seems to be the problem?"
"Sir, is there any way I can get an advance on my pay?" she asked.
"No. That's one of the things the Army specifically will not allow."
The Texan's shoulders drooped. "Then, I really have messed up," she admitted with a sigh. "Would you please excuse me, sir? I have to go tell Captain Pierce I've ruined everything."
"You are not dismissed, Lieutenant. Explain what you mean by that."
"You know how Captain Pierce has been concerned about raising enough money for the Tokyo trip? The reason I wasn't worried was because Crockett set up an account for me at the base bank there. That was my 'Plan B'. If we couldn't get the money together, I was going to withdraw enough to cover expenses."
"But that thrice-damned Yankee Captain at the bank won't release my money to me!" MacAllister's anger was returning. "He says that I have to have a male guardian sign the paperwork. A male guardian! Like I'm eight years old! And, I can't ask either of my brothers to take care of it because…they're busy right now."
"And, I can't get a call out to home, either. I was going to ask Milam to sell a few head of my cattle, although the market's so depressed right now that we're barely making pennies on the pound. Or ask my daddy for a loan. But there's no stateside calls being allowed. We have to pay the rest of the money for the hotel by the 6th." She shrugged and added dispiritedly, "I've run out of options, Colonel."
Potter nodded in understanding. "Lieutenant, would you like for me to try?"
"Would you, sir?" she asked hopefully.
"If you will give me your account information, I'll ring up this banker. Perhaps a full bird colonel will have more success persuading him to release your funds."
Colonel Potter slammed the phone down in disgust. "Jackass!" he exclaimed in annoyance. MacAllister was right. Captain Cartier had the same upper crust Boston accent, and attitude, as Winchester; except snootier, if that was possible. And everyone had been working so hard on this project. He hated to disappoint them. Deep in thought, he sat, drumming his fingers on his desk top.
"One of the places we're going to have to go to visit is the bathhouse right near the base," Hawkeye Pierce commented. He was leaning back on his cot, thumbing through a magazine that had arrived in a plain brown wrapper.
"Pierce," Charles Winchester, looking up from the letter he was reading, observed, "You probably should take a bath before you leave for Tokyo. I'm sure everyone around you would approve. I know I would."
"Thanks, Charles," the doctor from Maine replied. "I'll give that suggestion all the consideration it is due." He edged closer to his tent mate's bed. "Think about it, Beej: there we are---sitting in a large tub, filled with hot sudsy water, drinking saki and having giggling geishas scrub our backs and hand feeding us sushi and onagi. What more could you ask for?"
B J Hunnicutt moved his red Jack to his black Queen and turned over another card before answering, "I don't know, Hawk. That doesn't sound like something I should be doing."
"Actually, Hunnicutt, that sounds like a very good suggestion." Winchester put down his correspondence. "After all, it's not like your wife will be waiting up for you. Right, Pierce?"
"Uh, yeah, right. Peg will be home in California; she certainly won't be in Tokyo," the captain agreed uneasily.
"Maybe, you're right, Charles. It might be fun, at that," the man with the mustache agreed. He had a mischievous grin, "We can have a 'boy's night out'. Let's do it, Hawkeye."
"Yeah. Sure. If we have time," he replied without his previous enthusiasm. A knock on their door distracted him. The company clerk called from outside the tent requesting permission to enter. "Saved by the corporal," Pierce whispered in relief.
Corporal Klinger hurried inside and moved closer to the heater in the middle of the tent. "Major, Colonel Potter would like to see you in his office, right away."
"Very well, Klinger," the senior officer began buttoning his coat. "Thank you for rescuing me from more of Pierce's pointless pontifications."
The man being discussed responded, "At least it's better than listening to Winchester's witless witticisms."
"Klinger, quick," Hunnicutt called out, "get out of range! The alliteration artillery has arrived."
The company clerk looked at all three men in confusion, "Whatever you say, sir. Better hurry, Major. The colonel seems anxious about something."
"Winchester, I have an assignment for you." Potter stared at the man thoughtfully before searching through the reports on his desk. He handed one sheet to the other officer. "Read this directive from HQ."
Major Winchester read the material and looked up at his commander with a puzzled expression, "This is merely a request for someone from this medical staff to give a series of lectures on field nursing techniques to the nurses at Tokyo General Hospital. Why are you giving this to me? As much as I would like to go to Tokyo, this is Major Houlihan's job, not mine."
The colonel pulled another sheet from his pile of papers. "And this one is from I-Corps insisting that the reports on patient follow-ups be completed and submitted. I know that Lieutenant MacAllister has been working diligently on them. Some of these records, however, need to be obtained directly from Tokyo General. Now, I could send Major Houlihan to take care of both of these problems; but I would rather send MacAllister to review the records since she is the one who has completed all the prior work."
"However, the lectures must be given by someone with the rank of Major or above. Since I can not send both of my charge nurses away at the same time, but I can get a replacement surgeon..." Potter didn't finish his statement.
The major stiffened. "Are you suggesting that I give those lectures! That is a nurse's job. Not a skilled surgeon's!" He insisted disdainfully.
The colonel, with a slight rise of authority in his voice, continued, "Then, I'm sure you'll be able to handle it with out any problems, Winchester. I have another assignment for you, as well; an unofficial one." The man leaned forward and confided, "MacAllister has a financial problem that I am certain you can help her resolve…."
"Colonel, MacAllister can't go to Tokyo. She's only been here two months. She hasn't earned any extended leave yet." Major Houlihan reminded the commanding officer. She added, "The follow up reports for I-Corps do need to be completed. And I agree that my second-in-command is the logical choice. But some of my nurses will not see it that way."
"I understand that, Margaret," Potter replied. "And I apologize for the brouhaha that this is going to stir up. But, there is another reason why I need to send her to Tokyo…."
"Oh, Max..."
Corporal Klinger, sitting at his desk, flinched when he heard Major Winchester's tone. He turned to the officer. "Sir, if this is about that classical record that you requested..."
"Relax, Max. I have something far more suited to your talents," Winchester said. "What time should we be arriving in Tokyo?"
"Well, barring delays, you should be arriving there around 3pm."
"Excellent. While I am protesting the purpose for my trip to Tokyo, I see no reason why I can not enjoy myself while there." The officer from Massachusetts continued with his plans, "Now, don't mention any of this to any one, understand? I want this to be a surprise for the lieutenant."
"First, I want you to retrieve that package I placed in the colonel's safe the other day. Then, I want you to contact the Emperor Hotel in Tokyo and reserve two rooms for two nights. Both rooms should have a king sized bed and a bathtub."
"And will these be connecting rooms, Major?" Klinger asked with cautious interest.
"Indeed not! Next, I want you to contact the Royal Ballet House and the Yagishina Concert Hall and the..."
"Corporal," Lieutenant MacAllister greeted the company clerk, "I understand you're the one making all our arrangements for this morning. Do you know about what time we should be arriving?"
"Yes ma'am," he smiled at her. "I have your travel itinerary ready. Your chauffeur-driven transport truck will be arriving in approximately one hour. Major Winchester's replacement should be coming here on that same truck. From here, you will travel to scenic Kimpo where you will catch the shuttle flight to Seoul. From there, you will embark on the first military aircraft available to Tokyo---the Pearl of the Orient---and arrive around 3pm. And, if you are satisfied with these arrangements, please recommend Klinger's Asian Travel Agency to your friends and loved ones."
"Around three? Good." MacAllister didn't respond to his play acting, as she usually did. "Do we have any reports of expected fighting in the area?"
"None that we've been warned about. Is something wrong?" Klinger asked in concern.
"Nope. Everything's fine and dandy," she handed him a piece of paper. "Would you call the bank on the base and schedule an appointment with this man? Set it for around four this afternoon."
"Um-m-m, Lieutenant, I should warn you that Major Winchester has already made different plans for the two of you."
"He has, has he?" She raised an eyebrow. "Well, whatever he's got planned, will have to wait. This is important. And call Crockett's outfit for me, will you? I need to let him know where I'm going."
"Sure thing, lieutenant. You're going to like Tokyo," the clerk informed her while he opened the line.
"I doubt it," the woman answered softly.
"MacAllister is going to Tokyo! Can you believe that! That means Houlihan's going to cancel my leave request; I just know it! I won't be able to go to Seoul tomorrow---on my leave---which I earned; just so MacAllister and Winchester can spend some time together. That's so unfair!" Lieutenant Parnelli was complaining to her tent mate.
"They both have assignments to complete," Christy Baker remarked. "The major's going to be giving lectures all day. Sarabeth is going to have to search through all their records. And that's going to be a pain; I was stationed briefly at Tokyo General and their filing system is chaotic. I don't think they're going to have any time for anything else."
"I bet she'll find a way."
"Major, I didn't ask to go to Tokyo," Lieutenant MacAllister was speaking to her head nurse in the privacy of her quarters. "I tried to tell the colonel that I'm not the one he should be sending. And that this is going to cause problems."
"I know. However, the colonel's right. You're the most qualified for the job." The head nurse added, "And, it will give you the opportunity to take care of another matter at the same time."
"I'm grateful for that. But, what about Parnelli? She's supposed to leave for Seoul tomorrow."
"She'll simply have to wait until you return."
"Please reconsider that, Major," MacAllister spoke. "I realize that, with both of us leaving, y'all will be short-handed; however, there are no expected casualties, right now. And she has earned the time off. Everyone deserves a chance to get away from this place. Besides," she grinned, "if she's not here, you won't have to listen to her complaints."
