Disclaimer: If I owned X, I would tie up Yuzuriha with duct tape and dangle her 2 feet over a tank of man-eating squid…just for the hell of it.
Hooray! We made it to chapter 8 of my crazy funhouse called X Madness! This chapter is brought to you by small animals, Flintstones Push-Pops, and the under-appreciated letter Y. As in "y" won't the voices stop…..
Luv,
Kakyou-luverx
Ch. 8: Petco, Where the Pets Go
Location: Dark Alley
"Mr. Chaos!" The marker had been blown out of his hand by the blast, and Fuuma searched frantically for it on the ground.
Kamui cackled maniacally at his fallen Twin Star. "All bow before the Fairy Queen of Tokyo!"
"Where are you, Mr. Chaos? Answer me!" called out Fuuma. Then his eyes fell on an inky puddle in the distance. "No….Mr.…Chaos?"
Kamui brushed off his pink dress. "And now it's your turn!"
But just as he had said those words, Fuuma was on his feet, dashing at Kamui in rage. "Damn you!" cried Fuuma, and he stood poised to strangle the other any moment.
However, Fuuma never reached his target, for just as he leapt for the kill, a stream of Code Red struck him back to the ground. Yuuto stood over him with a victorious smile.
"Blond Infidel? You've betrayed me?" exclaimed Fuuma in disbelief.
Yuuto kneeled alongside Kamui. "I serve the Fairy Queen to the meaty path of enlightenment and volcano sauce!"
Kamui approached Fuuma with a wicked grin. "It's time to end this!" But just as Kamui's hand rose, something struck into his back. Shocked, he reached behind him to find that he was attacked with a splinter.
Sorata stood behind him, his eyes somewhat catlike. "This marker does not wish for Fuuma to die…" he spoke in an ethereal voice not his own.
Everyone stared.
Sorata suddenly shook his head, and when he looked back up, his eyes were back to normal. "SORATA HAVE BAD GAS…"
"This way! The explosion came from there! Just you wait, you evil Sand Witch!" exclaimed Seishirou from a distance.
"All you villains! Fear Captain Kakyou's super—AHH!" Kakyou tripped over a fire hydrant.
"Curses! We are outnumbered!" growled Kamui. "Come, Pink Minion! We must depart!" He then covered his hands over his eyes.
"Oh no! He's invisible! We'll never catch him now!" shouted Kakyou.
"Muahahaha! You have all been spared the wrath of the Fairy Queen!" Unfortunately, the first step Kamui took was into a brick wall. "OW! My nose!"
"I'm here, Your Majesty!" exclaimed Yuuto.
"But it hurts!" cried Kamui, who still kept his eyes covered.
"Just keep walking straight…that's right, straight!" guided Yuuto as they slowly made their escape. "Now to the right…NO, RIGHT!" A great thump sounded followed by a loud cry, and they had left the area.
Fuuma knelt over the pool of ink to find Mr. Chaos broken in half. "Mr. Chaos! Mr. Chaos, wake up!" he screamed over and over again.
"Drat!" exclaimed Kakyou to Seishirou. "We were too late!"
Fuuma's head suddenly perked up. "What's that, Mr. Chaos?" he cried to the dying marker. His eyes widened. "The future…has yet to be decided. Mr. Chaos…don't go!" But it was too late.
Kakyou arched an eyebrow. "'The future has yet to be decided?'" He burst out laughing. "That's crazy talk! That's like saying that salesmen aren't robots!"
"Or that Wyoming exists!" chimed in Seishirou.
"Or that the Gross National Product of New Zealand is $44,660,000,000 instead of $44,660,000,001!" joined in Sorata.
Again, everyone stared.
Meanwhile, Fuuma, after enduring the shock of his beloved's death, entered a catatonic state of which there seemed to be no awakening.
"It's like he's walled up inside!" exclaimed Kakyou. Seishirou abruptly stepped forward. "What're you doing?"
Seishirou crouched beside Fuuma. "An extra-secret technique of the frog people! I will revive him with the Vulcan Mind Meld!"
"NO!" protested Sorata. "TOO DANGEROUS!"
"But I must try!" replied Seishirou bravely. He then peered closer and closer at Fuuma and shut his eyes in deep concentration.
"The ancient technique!" remarked Kakyou in awe.
Seishirou grabbed Fuuma's shirt collar, and shook him. "WAKE UP!" Fuuma only slumped back to the ground, and Seishirou sighed in defeat. "Well, that's about all I can do. Nothing's going to wake him up. NOTHING!"
Sorata gasped excitedly. "BUNNY!"
Fuuma jolted awake. "Bunny? Where?" A white rabbit hopped past the alley. Fuuma rose to his feet. "His name will be Pedro, and he will do evil's bidding! Muahahaha!" he cackled as he ran after it.
"The elusive Sand Witch has again escaped! We must search this city until we find them!" shouted Seishirou as he chased after Fuuma.
"By all that is good, Captain Kakyou will not rest until my arch nemesis, the Fairy Queen, is defeated!" Kakyou then jumped in a shopping cart conveniently placed by the friendly author. "Come, Otis! We ride!"
Sorata stared after them dully before trotting after. "BUNNY RUN? SORATA WANT BUNNY!"
Location: Petco
"Welcome to Petco…where the pets go," sighed an employee as the door jingled open. "My name is Arashi. How can I—Subaru-san? Yuzuriha?" Yuzuriha entered the store dragging Subaru by his coat.
Arashi hastily took off her Petco uniform. "I don't work here, if that's what you're thinking—I don't!"
"Arashi!" called a fellow employee. "The boss wants you to clean the fish tanks!"
Arashi reddened. "It's not what you think!" But amidst her frantic protests she double-taked at the other two. White hair dye had been spilled all over Yuzuriha's head carelessly. Subaru was on all fours, meowing, his head covered in a newly-applied blue color, and his coat had been stained with other assorted dyes.
Arashi blinked. "Subaru?"
He looked up at her curiously. "Meow?"
Yuzuriha rolled up a nearby magazine, and swatted him over the head. "No! Bad dog! You know you're not supposed to talk to strangers!"
Arashi stared wordlessly.
The other girl tugged on Subaru's collar. "Now come on, Inuki! We need to get you a leash!"
"Ai-aisle six…" stammered Arashi. "And we never saw each other."
Yuzuriha walked past her unheedingly with the meowing Onmyouji in tow.
Arashi slumped against the check-out counter. "I must lay off the dog treats from now on…"
"Gee, Inuki. I wonder where the leashes are!" exclaimed Yuzuriha as she led Subaru down aisle two.
"Meow?"
"No…what would leashes be doing by the cat litter?" she dismissed. But as she was passing by, something caught her attention. The fuzzy animal section. Yuzuriha squealed. "Look at all the hair!" From no where in particular she grabbed a can of Martha Stewart-Brand Chartreuse Hair Dye. "Be a good dog and wait here!" she ordered before charging off giggling maniacally at a corner of the store labeled 'Hamster World.'
Subaru shook his head after her. "Meow-mew-meow meow, meow…."
"Hey, buddy!" called out a high-pitched voice. Subaru looked around in bemusement. "Yeah, you!" continued the voice. "Come over here!"
"Meow?" Subaru crawled over to the pet treats section.
"No, no! Over here!" cried out the voice.
Subaru returned to the fuzzy animals section. "Warmer…" He edged closer to a ferret cage. "Hot! HOT!" He blinked, but then started heading back for the pet treats. "Cold…"
Eventually, Subaru was back at the ferret cage, but when he peaked in, all he saw was a spotted ferret. He stared. "Meow?"
The ferret approached the bars of the cage. "The stupid human girl's gone, so you can drop the pet act!" it admonished.
Subaru cleared his throat. "You called me?"
"That's right, genius!" replied the ferret wryly. "Now listen closely…I want you to spring me from this joint. It's about time this jailhouse be put under new management!"
Subaru gasped. "You mean?"
The ferret nodded. "Exactly. Kill all the people. Those damned two-legs think they're almighty just because they got thumbs and social security and what not! It's time that we prove 'em wrong, and you, my furry friend, have somehow made it to the outside. You can get me outta here!"
Subaru scratched his head. "What'll I do?"
Just then, a red puff of smoke appeared to reveal the evil Subaru in a hipped-up pimp wardrobe. "What's shakin', homie? Another psychological dilemma?" greeted the devil.
"Where's the other one?" queried Subaru.
The devil lifted an eyebrow. "The other…oh, you mean the angel! He went out for nachos…"
"So what am I supposed do?"
The devil folded his arms. "It's always about you, isn't it? And you didn't even notice my new outfit. You're just like the rest of them! Always 'me' and not 'we'! Well, you're on your own now, buster! I'm going to stay with my mother, so GOOD BYE!" It vanished back into the crimson smoke.
Subaru gaped after it. "Hell with…" And he reached for the ferret cage.
Location: In front of Petco
Fuuma rushed for the store's entrance. "Pedro? Pedro? Where are you?"
"What's that over there?" exclaimed Kakyou. "Could it be an evil minion of the Fairy Queen?" Lying motionlessly against the door was a dead rabbit covered in chartreuse dye.
"BUNNY?" asked Sorata.
Fuuma shook his head. "No, Pedro was white…" He suddenly burst out in tears. "PEDRO RAN AWAY AND WENT TO MICHIGAN BECAUSE HE DOESN'T LIKE ME ANYMORE!"
Seishirou stooped over the dead rabbit. "This creature! It could only be the work of that no-good Sand Witch!" He unrolled a small square of Saran Wrap, and bound the animal. "Now it will be sealed forever!"
Several bloodcurdling screams sounded from within the building. "More trouble!" cried the Dreamseer. "Another job for Captain Kakyou!"
"And I bet that Sand Witch is behind it! I can feel them in there." Seishirou held the roll of Saran Wrap close. "Don't worry, Subaru-kun, I'm coming!"
"SANDWICH? TURKEY SANDWICH? SORATA HUNGRY!"
Fuuma looked at the Petco hopefully. "Pedro?" he sniffled.
And so our crazed heroes stood poised to enter the Petco…but what horror awaits them within?
Find out this, and more next chapter!
