Disclaimer: If I owned X, I would abduct all the bishies and place them in a giant ant farm and throw away the key (right after I lock myself in, of course) and then we would have a tuna party long into the night with…cheese sticks. And what a magical night it would be…

It is finally time...the last chapter of X Madness (sniffle). I never thought it would happen…but I guess we all saw it coming (waaaaah!) well, maybe not all of us… I mean to me the ending sort of snuck up behind me all with a rake in a raccoon costume, waiting to ambush me when my guard was down. Well, I'm not going down with a fight, Mr. Ending! I'll just have to screw things up so badly that CLAMP will fly to the U.S. with a sledgehammer of vengeance! Ha! Ha-ha! So this one'll be a super long chapter! Take that, untimely ending!

And before my heart-wrenching, gut-pounding conclusion, a word to the lovely audience that one day made the very sad mistake of looking for a humor X story to read. Congrats, I can now guarantee that your sanity has been cut off by ten years, and no, there are no recalls to the damage I have done. Yo-yo balls to everyone kind enough to read to this point, and many glomp attacks to those who have reviewed to get me to finish all this insanity, especially those who contributed ideas. In the words of a concerned friend, you really shouldn't be encouraging me….BUT YOU ALL ROCK ANYWAY! And now….the last chapter!

Luv,

Kakyou-luverx


Ch.20 Legend…in some distorted manner

Location: Gary's Gargantuan Golf-a-Rena Entrance

Announcer-guy-thing: When we last left our Heroes, the evil Fairy Queen had sent out his goldfish henchmen to annihilate the Special Friends. The goldfish were terrifying beasts, blood-thirsty, and…uh…err...not good! And as they battled on into the night, a raging storm thundered over them, and Gary's suffered a great plague. Bread could not be bought! Fathers could not feed their children! O' heaven above, was there any relief? The humanity! The—(Kakyou-luverx hits cheesy announcer with the corporate axe)-OWWW!

Ahem, back to Gary's Gargantuan Golf-a-Rena Entrance…

As the icy raindrops showered and deafening thunder clapped over the area, the Special Friends were beginning to lose faith. Subaru and Yuuto huffed in pained exhaustion behind Seishirou, who was maintaining his Saran Wrap barrier.

"They-they're too strong!" panted Yuuto from the ground. "We can't win!"

"Special Friends!" admonished Subaru.

"Suby-kun's right! It's not over yet! We can still fight!" jumped in Seishirou.

"But just look at what they did to the unbeliever!" Yuuto gestured outside the Saran Wrap barrier to a lifeless crater that appeared to be hit with an atomic explosion. The goldfish ominously lined the crater's edge while Sorata lied in the center in a fetal position.

Seishirou stubbornly shook his head. "But as long as my Kekkai holds out, they can't touch us!"

Another bolt of lighting struck, and when the flash had cleared, they found themselves completely surrounded by the goldfish henchmen. Just when they thought things couldn't get any worse, Subaru yelped. "KEKKAI!"

They all sweat-dropped. The Saran Wrap was starting to tear.

"This is it!" whimpered Yuuto. The merciless rain tore deeper into the Saran Wrap barrier, and they all winced, bracing themselves for the goldfish attack.

But just then, as lightning flashed once more, the goldfish bowls had been knocked over. Flying as swiftly as the rain, their saviors rushed in to aid the Special Friends. The three stared, dumbfounded of what exactly had rescued them, until Subaru spoke up.

"DONUTS!"

Sure enough, an army of donuts had flown in to combat the goldfish, led by a single war cry, uttered by another Special Friend. "WARRIOR PRINCESSES ATTACK!"

Location: Inside the First Hole

The sheets of rain drummed against the giant plastic chicken as Kakyou struggled against the ropes that imprisoned him. However, the more the Dreamseer fought, the more the single rope that held him over the cauldron began to weaken. The rope above him creaked, and his heart raced. Kakyou snuck another look at the terrible substance below that waited to consume him.

"No! Not Cocoa Puffs!" he screamed to himself. "The one weakness of Captain Kakyou, the very seed of the bird that bit me! Anything but Cocoa Puffs!"

The rope creaked once more.

"HEEELP!" he cried. But his scream only echoed along the chicken's walls. He had only a few more seconds until the rope would snap and he would plunge into a chocolatey-crunchy hell. "I'm too young to die!"

Suddenly the door to the inside of the chicken obstacle swung open, and Kakyou quieted. The doorway was completely absent of any presence, but the Dreamseer's eyes filled with tears. "You…you came back for me!"

The doorway remained silent, but Kakyou was sobbing with happiness. "OTIS! You've come to save me!"

Location: …The Eighteenth Hole (bum, bum, bummm…)

Fuuma took a deep breath as he set down his golf club. "At last…the final battle! It is time…for Mr. Chaos, for Pedro, and for Mr. Huggles I shall defeat the Fairy Queen!" His grasp tightened over the Tinkerbelle Wand, and he approached the doorway that separated him and Kamui. He gathered all his resolve, and turned the brass handle of the castle maintenance door.

When Fuuma entered the castle, he was greeted by darkness. "But there can only be one future, and one Fairy Queen!" hissed Kamui from the gloom. "You know how this will end!"

Fuuma's fists tightened. "Mr. Chaos, 'the future has yet to be decided', right?"

At the other end of the castle, Kamui drew his 'Where's Waldo?' wand, and posed melodramatically. "I call upon the dark powers of Waldo!" The wand glowed dimly, and Fuuma's eyes widened.

"He's calling upon the Satanic Waldo god!" he cried in dismay.

Kamui held the glimmering wand tightly with both hands. "It's time to decide the future! I am the true Fairy Queen! HYAAA!" A wave of energy shot out from the wand.

"Holy shit!" shouted Fuuma, and he ducked down just before the wave could make contact. The castle wall behind him shattered, and the freezing rain beat down upon the remaining object. Fuuma gasped. "A sock puppet!" The wand had transformed the castle wall into a sock puppet.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHA! Sock puppets! And you're next!" he laughed viciously.

"That's what you think!" Fuuma swung down the Tinkerbelle Wand in Kamui's direction, but to his surprise, it did nothing. Fuuma frantically waved the wand again. Nothing. "Wha-what's wrong! I used the Zingers! Why won't my Zingers work against L.E.M.O.N.?"

Kamui chuckled maliciously. "And now it is time for you to meet your end!" He brought down the Waldo wand once more in a flash.

Fuuma sweat-dropped and dodged the attack, and another sock puppet appeared at his side in place of a wall. "No! No sock puppet!" he wailed.

"You can't avoid my attacks forever!" growled Kamui.

However, when the Fairy Queen had attacked again, luck was on Fuuma's side. For as he jumped away from the latest magical wave, he slipped on two rotting eggs below his feet, making him trip on octopus ink and the dead otters.

"No! WALDO!" screamed Kamui. "What have you done?" The Waldo face had been ruined. "MY POWER IS FADING! NOOOO!" Kamui dropped to his knees, but glared at Fuuma murderously. "You may have destroyed Waldo, but I still have enough power to kill you! You can't defeat me! I am the Imperial Fairy Queen! And you are just one person!"

"You're wrong!" shouted a voice. Kakyou entered the castle.

"Captain Kakyou!" exclaimed Fuuma with relief.

"You!" gasped Kamui. "But how?"

Kakyou patted the invisible golden hippo at his side. "Otis rescued me! So you'll have to fight three now!"

"Make that seven!" called another voice. Seishirou stood on the other side of the ruined walls along with Subaru, Yuuto, and a groaning Sorata.

"Eight!" corrected a third voice. Arashi crossed her arms triumphantly, with the donut army behind her.

Fuuma was on the brink of tears. "Special Friends…" His gaze hardened at Kamui. "Now you'll have to defeat us all!"

Kamui was seething. "FOOLS! Even though I've lost Waldo's power, I still have the wand! I'll destroy you all! Starting with you!" he pointed at Fuuma. "Do you have any idea of what kind of power I have? I AM THE FAIRY QUEEN!" He raised the 'Where's Waldo?' wand high in the air, and let out a maddened shriek. But when he was about to release another wave of energy, his wand flew out of his hands. "WHAT?" yelled Kamui.

Charlie the Chalupa towered over Kamui, the wand in his hands. His eyes were possessed.

Magic Taco: It is you who will be destroyed, Fairy Queen!

"MY MAGICAL RELIC! GIVE ME BACK MY MAGICAL RELIC!" howled Kamui as he leapt at Charlie for the Waldo Wand. But Charlie was far taller than Kamui, and so he ended up only jumping up and down for it in vain.

Magic Taco: You want it? Work for it! Come on, jump!

"WHY?" whimpered Kamui.

Kakyou tapped Fuuma's shoulder. "It is time."

Fuuma nodded, and smiled warmly. "Special Friends…you have all helped me to this point. Now it is time to avenge Mr. Chaos and get Mr. Huggles back! It is time to fulfill my wish."

"I'm not through yet!" Kamui was trembling in fury. "I can still destroy you with my Pink wrath! Just as I murdered that worthless marker!" He raised a hand threateningly.

"Mr. Chaos! This is for you!" Fuuma angrily pointed the Tinkerbelle Wand at Kamui, but, still, nothing would happen. "It's still not working!" despaired Fuuma.

Kakyou studied the wand curiously and suddenly brightened. "I know!" he exclaimed, and he clicked a small switch on the wand to 'on'.

Fuuma grinned at the Dreamseer. "Captain Kakyou! You turned my Magic Relic on!"

Kakyou shrugged. "What are Special Friends for?"

(A/N: wahahahahahaha…the innuendoing!)

However, Kamui was not going to wait another moment. "I won't lose!" And a wave of energy flew from his hand.

"GYAGGHH!" Fuuma shrieked his battle cry, and flung the Tinkerbelle Wand in his Twin Star's direction. The two magics collided, and the foundation of what was left of the castle quaked. A moment later, a blinding flash devoured the battlefield, and a strong gust blew the Fairy Queen and the Special Friends to the ground. Then all that remained of the plastic castle were charred ruins.

The rain slowed to a drizzle over the fight. "Unnh…" moaned Kamui. He lay flat on his back, his magical arsenal completely exhausted by his final attack. He slowly rose from the ground, but when his eyes glanced over his body, he dropped to his knees screaming. "NO! NOT MY PINK WRATH!" Squirted across his pink dress was a giant ink stain…an ink stain?

Fuuma gasped once he had pulled himself to his feet to witness the miracle before him. Hovering over the defeated Fairy Queen was the glimmering form of a permanent marker. "Mr.….Mr. Chaos?"

He felt hot tears trickling down his face as he gaped at the deceased marker. Mr. Chaos stared back at Fuuma, sparkling in ghostly radiance, and then slowly faded away from sight, leaving Kamui wailing in ink-stained misery. Fuuma lowered his head forlornly, and the other Special Friends kept silent. But when he glanced back up, a serene smile was spread across his lips. "I…I understand it now. Mr. Chaos will never die, because he will always live on in my heart. That was why I could see him one last time…!"

"Just as the Wise Magic Taco said," whispered Yuuto solemnly.

"And Pedro will live on too, and, and Mr. Huggles…all of them are kept alive inside of me!" continued Fuuma.

"It's finally over!" exclaimed Seishirou in relief as he pulled Subaru closer to him.

"No…my Pink Wrath…Waldo…the Pixie Kingdom…all lost..!" groaned Kamui weakly.

"Then we won?" asked Kakyou.

Fuuma kept his smile. "I think—"

"ARRRGH!" screamed a voice from above. "—SQUEAK!—"

"It couldn't be?" cried Arashi.

Fuuma was nearly floored with excitement. "Mr. Huggles!" The evil squeaky toy glowered down at them from the bough of a nearby tree, completely covered by bandages.

Martin was fuming. "You—YOU…!"

Fuuma's arms were outstretched. "Mr. Huggles! You've returned! Come down!"

Martin exploded. "IDIOTS! EVERY ONE OF YOU IS A COMPLETE AND UTTER—SQUEAK—MORON! INTOLERABLE BUFFOONS, EVERY LAST ONE! AND YOU INCOMPETENT LOLLI-POP-HEADED, HALLUCINOGENIC CRETINS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FATE OF THE WORLD? BLASPHEMY! HEAR ME NOW! I, MARTIN, WILL NOT REST UNTIL I SEND ALL OF YOU SPIRALING INTO A HELL OF TORTUROUS NIGHTMARES, A UNIVERSE FILLED WITH TORMENT BEYOND YOUR WORST FEARS WHERE YOU WILL TOIL IN YOUR OWN WRETCHED STUPIDITY FOR ALL TIME!"

Everyone: …

"I WILL EAT YOUR HEARTS SLOWLY; DIP YOU OVER BATTERY ACID INFECTED BY SHARKS, AND DANCE OVER YOUR SKULLS AS I TAKE OVER THIS CITY! HEAR MY NAME! I AM MARTIN, DESTROYER OF—" Before Martin could finish his rant, a gray blur rushed up the tree, and snatched the stuffed animal away. At the base stood Inuki, whose pearly fangs chomped down on Martin's body.

Inuki: Damn dimwitted idiotic twits. As always it's up to me to save the day…

The Special Friends continued to remain in a stunned silence before Fuuma cheered. "That's it, Mr. Huggles! Let the dog of mystery cleanse your spirit! Be free!"

"AAAAAA-SQUEAK-!"

"It's over. At last!" announced Yuuto wearily.

Arashi danced amidst her donut followers. "Another victory for the Special Friends!"

"Special Friends! Special Friends!" chanted Subaru.

"WE WIN!" celebrated Seishirou alongside the onmyouji.

Magic Taco: The path to meaty enlightenment has been attained!

"SORATA HUNGRY!"

Kakyou was jumping up and down with his imaginary hippo. "We did it, Otis! We did it all together!"

Fuuma threw his hand to the sky. "SPECIAL FRIENDS, UNITE!"

-------------Two Hours Later--------------

The moon had already begun its descent toward the horizon, night coming to its close. The fierce storm that had once encompassed all of the Golf-a-Rena had passed, leaving the grasses of the golf course damp and cold. But it made little difference to the Seals and Angels, who had at last collapsed in exhaustion from the madness of the day before. Inuki had fled the scene with Martin tight in his mouth, and Charlie the Chalupa had returned to Taco Bell, but it made little difference to our drugged heroes. They were finally free of the Happy Dart's hold, and they continued to dream, oblivious to all that had happened.

Kamui slept curled up in a ball, his hands clutching his pink dress in the middle of the castle ruins. Nearby, the rest of the Special Friends could be found. Kakyou rested against the trunk of the tree, his expression losing its animation to a pale color, but he nevertheless seemed peaceful in his rest. Next to him was Arashi, who slept in the protection of her donut companions. Sorata snored not far off, twitching violently in his dreams. Yuuto's body was strewn over a neatly clipped shrubbery, the Water Master mumbling something about Tacos. Seishirou lied stretched over the grasses, his arms wrapped possessively around Subaru, as the young onmyouji embraced the Sakurazukamori back with a happy smile on his face. Finally, Fuuma slept in the very center of the group, in the protection of his very Special Friends.

So peaceful. So quiet…

WEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOO! Suddenly, dozens, maybe hundreds, of shrill police sirens sounded, and in a second, the sleeping dragons were completely surrounded by the entire Tokyo police force. And they slept on.

Satsuki, Yuzuriha and Karen had been captured only hours before, and they were also incarcerated along with their comrades. Needless to say, when they all woke up in their dark jail cells, things got pretty interesting what with the dyed hair and traumatizing cross-dressing. But that's a story for a different time.

The Angels all broke out of their cells the very moment they came to (except for Kakyou who was dragged out by a very angry Fuuma with a hangover), and the Seals reluctantly chose to remain peaceful despite the situation…well, that's not entirely true. When Subaru had woken up in Seishirou's arms wearing a Catholic Schoolgirl uniform, the other in a bunny costume, you can only imagine what terrible conclusions the Sumeragi had jumped to, and the cell wall had been obliterated in three seconds flat. But as for the rest of them, they were eventually bailed out by Mr. Aoki (who had a suspiciously wicked glint in his eye) because that was what nice fathers do…don't they?

EPILOGUE! (A/N: WOOO! EXTRA LONG CHAPTER!)

--------One week, several bottles of normal hair dye, and a lot of therapy later-------

Location: Dragons of Earth Headquarters

Fuuma sat in the throne room rubbing his hands in a malicious, calculating manner trying to appear forbidding and evil. "Evil-evil-evil-evil-evil!" he chanted to himself with such concentration that he didn't notice that Yuuto had stepped into the chamber.

Yuuto raised an eyebrow. "Are your hands cold, 'Kamui'?"

Fuuma shot daggers at the Water Master for breaking his concentration. "I'm trying to channel my inner soul of evil…"

"Oh," remarked Yuuto blankly. Fuuma continued, and after shifting about in boredom for a few seconds, Yuuto pulled out a Taco from his trench coat and chomped down.

Fuuma was beyond irritated. "Where did you get that taco?"

"This?" Yuuto pointed at the half-eaten Taco. "I quit my job for a simpler life down at Taco Bell. The new manager really likes me too, says I'm on the meaty path to enlightenment and volcano sauce or something like that…"

"You got a JOB at TACO BELL?" hissed Fuuma incredulously.

Yuuto nodded, ignoring the other's bad mood. "I was getting bored since Kanoe exploded into a gory splash of charred flesh, and Satsuki cut that deal with the TV execs," Fuuma leaned in closer for more information. "Yeah, Fox offered her a Saturday morning cartoon featuring Beast's newfound Transform-O power. So that left me all lonely, especially since Kakyou won't talk to anyone, even though we all know he can wake up whenever he wants now…"

Fuuma gnarred his teeth. "Don't mention that worthless Dreamseer's name!"

"I guess you still haven't forgiven him for infecting us all and causing the near destruction of our noble cause and your egotistical obsession with being evil," remarked Yuuto, shaking his head.

"Yeah, and the big meanie-head won't help me cheat in my next poker game with Seishirou to complete my next brilliant plan!"

Yuuto face-faulted, remembering Mr. Chaos. "I won't ask."

"I swear I'll kill him."

"But doesn't he want to die?"

"……damn. Well I'll just do nothing to him. Nothing at all! That'll teach him a lesson! Bwahahaha!"

Yuuto managed to look even more uncomfortable. "Whatever. But speaking of that crazy little fiasco, whatever happened to that evil conqueror, what's his face, Martin? That started all of this?"

"Several days ago I tracked down that spirit-dog-mutt and the possessed body, and with the Sumeragi's aid, we exorcised the spirit into a mayo jar. Then I sent the jar overseas to somewhere called Tennessee. Don't know where I heard of that place before…" explained Fuuma hastily.

"The Sumeragi?"

"Don't get me wrong. We're still all bitter enemies, but we happened to have a common problem."

"And where was the Sakurazukamori in all of this?" queried Yuuto.

"No idea," he replied indifferently. "Haven't seen him since prison. Although I have read about some interesting government deaths this week involving the smell of sakura, and oddly enough, Saran Wrap."

Yuuto paused, but was quick to continue his line of questioning once a new thought popped into his mind. "Hey…what happened to Martin's host body? The stuffed animal- squeaky-toy-thing?"

Fuuma threw his hands up in the air. "What is this? Twenty questions? Sod off, and leave me to my plotting!"

"Geez! Touch-y!" replied Yuuto as he left the room.

After the room went quiet, Fuuma peered around the corner to make sure that he was alone before he lifted up the cushion of his throne. Underneath the pillow sat the already-mentioned squeaky toy, as deformed and lovely as it had always been. Fuuma cuddled the plush animal. "Oh, Mr. Huggles! I'll love you forever, and never lose you again! Never ever!"

Location: Imonoyama Mansion

Subaru groaned and mumbled something unintelligible as he rolled out of bed with yet another horrible headache. Ever since that terrible, terrible morning that he wanted to forget , he continued to have a monstrous hangover from the Happy Dart Disease, the vast amounts of Sugar, the Crazy-b-Gone pills, and to top it all off, the strain from his latest exorcism. With a heavy sigh, he pushed his bedroom door open and started toward the bathroom for some more ibuprofen when the sound of hysterical laughter entered his ears.

After blinking curiously a couple of times in an attempt to regain his energy, he realized that it was coming from the downstairs living room. He hesitantly started down the stairway, knowing the moment he took the first step that he was making a mistake. He was right.

Sorata was on the floor rolling in fits of laughter along with Mr. Aoki while Kamui and Arashi looked positively sick. Yuzuriha also chuckled as she gobbled down the last of her ice cream. It was then that all the color drained from Subaru's face as he realized that the TV was on, and it wasn't just any movie that was playing.

Kamui was on the screen twirling around in his pink dress. "COME PINK MINION! WE MUST FIND WALDO AND…FREEZIES! YAY FREEZIES!"

Yep. Aoki had taped the whole thing.

"Ka-Kamui!" exclaimed Sorata between giggles. "I TOLD YA YOU WOULD BE PRETTY…IN PINK!"

"Aww, Kamui! You're so cute!" chortled Yuzuriha.

Kamui looked as if he were either going to decapitate the closest thing to him or pass out. He managed to find a happy median, and suddenly found the blank wall in front of him the most interesting thing in the world.

The next flash was of Arashi in her "warrior princess" garb. Sorata was laughing so hard that he couldn't get the words out. If only she could drop dead on the spot right then…

Subaru was smart enough to know that he had to get the hell out that room as soon as possible, but as fate would have it, Yuzuriha had caught him leaving. "No, Subaru! You can't leave!" whined the girl. The onmyouji felt all eyes settle on his back, which was even more reason to flee, however, he couldn't take another step as Sorata's arms yanked his shoulder back into the room.

"Now, now," admonished Aoki mockingly. "We can't exclude Subaru from the party, now can we?"

"Besides…won't you miss your Sei-san?" howled Sorata.

Subaru felt a blush creep to his face, and did his best to force it back down. "Wha-What are you talking about?" he stammered indignantly.

On cue, the screen switched to a drugged Subaru who was glomping Seishirou. "Sei-san, Sei-san, Sei-san, Sei-san!" his past self screamed as he was half-climbing over his opposite.

"Look! Look!" screamed Yuzuriha. "Subaru's blushing!"

"I-I am not!" stuttered the onmyouji, whose face was a deep shade of tomato.

Sorata roughly pulled Subaru to his side. "Oh, do you miss your Sei-san already, Suby-kun?"

Subaru glanced helplessly at the television that had just flashed to Sorata's escapades. "Well… at least I'm not…!" He trailed off his comeback the moment Kamui shook his head, realizing it was no good defending himself. He forgot; Sorata had no shame.

"If I learned anything from all of this," began Arashi in an attempt to rescue the other Seal. "It's that we should never stand in front of Princess Hinoto when she sneezes."

Yuzuriha looked up from her ice cream in confusion. "Sneeze? I wasn't hit by her sneeze!"

Everything went silent, and Arashi blinked. "…you weren't?"

"Nope! I dodged at the last moment 'cause germs are bad!"

More silence. "…you mean you were NEVER infected?" Arashi seemed like she were about to explode the moment the girl shook her head.

Aoki was already on the phone. "Hello, Tokyo Insane Asylum? I'm calling to commit someone…"

For the first time since Subaru had entered the room, Kamui spoke, although the tone in his voice was clearly regretting it. "…Where's Sorata?" The Kansai monk had disappeared from the room.

"Oooh, Kamui! Look what I have!" called Sorata from the entrance. The poor boy paled once he had recognized the object in the other's hand. It was the 'Where's Waldo?' Wand.

Before Kamui had a chance to run away, Sorata had pounced on him and placed the wand in his palm. "Come on, Fairy Queen! Do a trick for us!" However, he was blatantly unaware of the fire beginning in Kamui's eyes.

Arashi sweat-dropped. "Maybe you should quit teasing him…"

"Only if you wear that bra for me one last time, Miss!" Sorata was too lost in his hysterical laughter to have any sense of the danger he was in.

Kamui's expression transformed into a look of pure rage. "You really should stop…" warned Subaru.

"WAHAHAHA! COME ON KAMUI, USE THE WAND!" But before Sorata could start another attack of laughter something unexpected happened. The Waldo Wand began to glow, and a magical wave shot at him. Kamui really did use the wand.

Aoki paled. "Sor-Sorata?" But all that remained of the Seal was a happy sock puppet.

Kamui smiled to himself, and pocketed the wand. "I'll be keeping this…"

Subaru and Arashi gaped at Kamui, then at the sock puppet, then at each other. Arashi broke the silence. "…………..Hey, is that Shrek Strawberry Ice Cream in the freezer?" The onmyouji shrugged, and silently followed her to the refrigerator.

And that's how it went down with the Seals. Kamui would always keep the 'Where's Waldo' wand by his side. Sorata started a popular kiddy-sock puppet theater at the library, and Arashi quit her job at Petco to devote all her time to ridding her room of donuts. Karen became a full-time homicidal pyromaniac on weekends, and Princess Hinoto's hair fell out from all the Martha Stewart Hair Dye. Yuzuriha would spend the rest of her days in a mental hospital, bound in a tight jacket screaming something about Yan Yan. And Subaru would continue to stay on medication till the day he died, spending sleepless nights haunted by that one morning he woke up with Seishirou and fighting some new cravings for cotton candy and ice cream. And they all lived insanely ever after…

Location?

Kakyou treaded along the seashore, his golden eyes gazing into the deep sapphire waters stretching in the distance. Of course he could remember every insane act he had performed in that one day the Happy Dart had forced him outside of the dream (he had a feeling that his sleeping body still wore the silk boxers). And of course he couldn't recall such memories without feeling sick with shame, which was why he hadn't bothered to face his comrades awake quite yet. However, each time Kakyou dared to remember, with the disgrace and embarrassment there also came a feeling of serenity.

For as ashamed as he was of the whole incident, it was his only memory that didn't strike unbearable sadness into his soul. And even if it wasn't Kakyou, but the effect of a dangerous drug, he could remember something that he hadn't experienced for years…he had been happy. It was such a strange idea, but it gave him hope for just the smallest moment for an optimistic future that he never expected.

As each foaming wave rolled along the sand, a refreshing gust tousled his light hair. The air was soft and warm across his skin, and stirred a feeling of peace into his heart. Yet an odd craving kept tugging at the corners of his mind. With a weak sigh he gave into that pestering desire, and a small object started to emerge into the dreamscape. He glanced back out into the sea, and he could almost hear the soft waves folding onto the beach, and the melodious gull cries.

The bowl had finished materializing into the Dreamseer's hands, but before he placed it to his lips he could have almost sworn that his rippled reflection was on the verge of grinning back at him. "The future…is yet to be decided," he whispered quietly. And he downed the bowl of Cocoa Puffs.

A/N: Yay! Happy ending for Kyou-kun! Wee! But wait! It's not over yet (wicked grin)!

Location: Dragons of Earth Headquarters

"Who loves you? Who loves you?" cooed Fuuma to the squeaky toy. "I do! I love you Mr. Huggles! Oh yes I do!" As Fuuma was kissing Mr. Huggles obnoxiously, a clump of white hair rose from the back of the throne, followed by two crazed eyes.

Nataku glomped Fuuma from behind. "DADDY! Daddy-Daddy-Daddy-Daddy-Daddy! I'm back now, from Tennessee-wee! I became a super karaoke pop star-wee! But then they called me something called a Transgender-homo, and ran me out in a idiotic mob-wee!"

Fuuma yawned. "Yeah, that's peachy, Nataku…" Nataku began bouncing up and down around the throne yelling 'Kazuki'. But in a horrible moment for Fuuma, something had just clicked. "Wait…where did you say you went…?"

"Tennessee, Tennessee, Tennessee-wee!" sung a maddened Nataku. "But I think I caughta-cold or somethin' from a Mayo jar that shot a dart at me…" Its nose twitched. "Aaaaa….aaaa…"

Fuuma's eyes went large. "Oh, butternuts…"

--End--(really)

And thus ends the X Madness series...(cries)…all over now, gone bye-bye is my insane little fic. What a sad day indeed. Hope y'all enjoyed my swift descent into madness, and I hope even more that I took a few of you down with me kicking and screaming…mission accomplished. And next time when all of you feel the need to lose your mind permanently, kindly remember the vortex to all that is bizarre and senseless…X Madness forever!

Insanely yours,

Kakyou-luverx