I don't own .hack/SIGN, though I wish I did.
Episode 2: Something happens.
Tsukasa looked up into the rainy sky. "It's raining cats and dogs…"
Maha landed on Tsukasa. "….., ……. ." she apologized and floated away.
"Tsukasa."
"Wha?" Tsukasa was wide-eyed. "Maha, you can talk!"
"I was always able to talk."
She hugged the oversized cat. "You can talk! You can talk! Oh wow, you're really soft."
"Are you okay…."
Subaru poked herself. "I don't think I'm that soft."
Tsukasa opened her eyes. "Maha?"
"Maha's in her trailer." Subaru paused. "Is Maha a boy or a girl?"
"Why don't you go ask her?" Tsukasa blinked a couple of times. "Subaru? Where are you?"
"Hey Maha!"
Maha faced Subaru. "….?"
"Are you a he or a she?" Subaru asked.
".'. . … ."
"What?"
"… ."
"I can't hear ya. Speak up."
".'. . …, …. ..!"
"Damn Maha, use your vocal cords for once!"
".'. . …, … ….. .!"
"Don't you yell at me!"
".'. … ……. ."
"Speak louder! I can't hear a darn thing you're saying."
". …. …… ."
Kurim sat in his trailer in front of the mirror, brushing his hair. "I'm a pretty man, I'm a pretty man, I'm a—" A packet fell to the floor. "Whoops!" He bent down and picked it up. "Shouldn't leave my plans to DESTROY TSUKASA lying around. You bad thing! Someone could see you."
"Like me?"
Kurim turned around. "Ginkan? How long were you there!"
"Uh…" He looked at his watch. "Twenty-five hours."
"Impossible. Just an hour ago you were making people faint in the kitchen."
"Oh, that guy? He's Crimson Knight Number Three (CK-3). Hired him to distract people"
Meanwhile, in the kitchen…
CK-3 stood before two shiny reflective silver-colored ovens and said to himself, "I'm a pretty lady, I'm a pretty lady." Twirled around a couple times, frilling his apron. "I feel pretty! All so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and—"
…And moving on before any more unfortunate passersby walks past.
"So…" Kurim started.
"So…" Ginkan also started.
"Why are you here?"
"You know very well why I'm here."
"No, I don't."
"Of course you do. No one else knows about why I'm here or that I'm even here, but you know why."
"Damn you, I don't."
"Ooooh, heh, right. Of course," he took the liberty of winking a few times, "you don't."
"Dude, I'm not gay."
"What?"
"Just tell me why you're here, damn it."
"You know very—"
"Just… shut up."
"…. ….. .. ….. !"
"God, it's impossible to talk to you, Maha."
"Oh, that's why you're here." Kurim fingered the horribly hidden packet of plans to DESTROY TSUKASA!
"Took you long enough!"
"So what exactly do you want?"
"You know ve—"
"Oh god, not again."
"Fine fine. I want to team up with ya."
"I'm not gay."
"Never said you were."
"Uhh.."
"Anyways, together, we will be able to DESTROY TSUKASA!"
Kurim whipped out a contract and handed it to Ginkan. "Here ya go!"
"What's this?"
"I'm suing ya."
"Why!"
"'DESTROY TSUKASA!' is my trademark."
"No it isn't."
"Yeah it is."
The trailer door slammed open. Bear poked his head through. "No it isn't."
A book thrown to Bear's head was Kurim's reply.
"Ow, okay okay, I'm going." Rubbing his temple, Bear closed the door.
Ginkan threw the contract to the side. "Seriously, we can just team together until Tsukasa is out of the way. And then we'll separate."
The door creaked slightly open. A faint "No it iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn't…" could be heard.
"SPIRAL PIERCE!"
Bear has been killed by Kurim!
Kurim has gained a level!
Bear logged back in. "No he didn't."
"VAK DON!"
(Darn it Mirelle, go away.)
Bear trudged away with Mirelle.
A piece of paper landed on Kurim's head. "…I'm being sued by Ragnarok for using spiral pierce in a different game?"
Ginkan ripped the paper up. "Anyways, our partnership will last at least until we DESTROY TSUKASA, because, ya know, she's the main reason neither of us can get Subaru."
"I thought you couldn't get her because of your looks," Kurim pondered.
"Oh, so you're saying that you look better than me?"
"Obviously. I've got the buff 'n' exposed chest going on."
"Then why haven't you won her yet?"
"…"
Tsukasa was in stage 2's kitchen. He saw something cyan or light blue walk into the room. "Hey, Subaru, look! It's a purple cherry cake…. What happened to you?"
Subaru glanced at a couple hundred scratches on her arms and legs and her ripped clothing. "Maha has a horrid temper."
I'm an impulse writer when it comes to these kinds of writings... but then, without writing the first thing that comes to mind, where's the... um... I'll get back to you on that.
