No Christmas special really…. Considering how somewhat anachronistic that would be a month late. coughs. Yeah, I'm updating late, but now more often I think less logically so I can 'think' of more things to write.

……

"Ginkan, do you copy? Over."

-krrzzsh-

"I said, 'Ginkan, do you copy? Over.'"

-krrzzsh-

Kurim did a backflip-roll-crouch move behind a desk.

"Ginkan, are you okay? Did something happen? Give me a sign!"

Ginkan bopped Kurim's head with the butt of his sword. "Kurim. I'm right next to you."

Episode 4!The Magic Something.

Kurim jumped to his feet, rubbing his head. "What's the big idea? This isn't going to plan!"

"And the plan isn't going with common sense!" Ginkan walked over to the battered door of the trailer they were in, feeling along the walls all the way. "First you use some Vak skill to blow up Subaru's trailer door, and now you're pretend you're on some Mission Impossible assignment."

"It's not pretending; it's being precautious."

"In Subaru's trailer!"

"Uh, well, yes!"

"You're such an idiot."

Kurim threatened Ginkan with the magic eraser by waving it in front of his face, and though Ginkanhad no eyes (or horns) and could not see, he felt threatened anyways.

Ten minutes and a messed up trailer later, the two gave up and headed for Aura's trailer located somewhere in between section 4G, and section D.

"It would seem," Kurim pondered aloud, "that since Subaru hasn't the magic pencil, Aura must have it! It makes all sense!"

"What does?" Ginkan had his arms stretched out since he lacked a blind man's cane.

"That I'm more handsome than you."

Ginkan scowled. "Well obviously! I'm lacking facial features here."

"Watch out! Don't perform this at home!" Kurim poised his weapon.

"This is home, dolt. We live in the studios." Ginkan was quickly interrupted by an explosion. "Kurim!"

"What? It's not as bad as the last trailer." Kurim kicked at the burnt door that had completely fallen off its hinges of Aura's trailer. He looked around inside. "Is it just me or is this place much more spacious than how it looks from the outside?"

Outside it looked like a normal mobile home. Inside it looked like a large field of grass glazed in fuzzy lights with a random circle of trees around a single white bed. In general, it just was the duplicate of Aura's realm in .hack/SIGN before Morgana went mad and left everything to die.

"Man, I didn't know Aura actually liked that kind of place," Kurim commented. "I thought she just reluctantly tolerated the place during the filming, considering all she would do is sleep around."

Ginkan immediately yanked at Kurim's hair. "Of course all Aura 'would do is sleep around'. Don't you ever read the script?"

"Only the important parts."

"Which are, to you?"

"The ones I'm in. Duh."

……

The director leaned back in his chair. "So we're done with episode 'Evidence'?"

Half the people in the editing room were asleep. Actually, only the director, Maha, Aura, and Morgana were awake.

". …. …. …" Maha sighed.

Morgana concurred. "We've been at this for too long… my back is aching like mad."

"… …'. …. …. . ….."

"Well, if I did have a back, then it would be aching."

Aura raised her hand. "Question."

"Shoot," the director said.

"You know in episode 'Party', Tsukasa, Bear, and Mimiru were walking down a path and asked another party of female blade people a question? Did the American dubbed version have one of the heavy blade girls voiced by a guy, as did the Japanese version of the episode?"

The director had no answer for that, or at least his face didn't show it. "I… don't know. We don't do the dubs here."

"Another question. Do you think anyone would mind the random changes in art style in episode 'Evidence'?"

"I'm sure they'd notice the episode is a bunch of scenes from the first few episodes and 14 put together to form a point, anyways."

"…, … .. … …….. .. …," Maha noted.

"Gee willikers, you're right!" Aura stood up quickly. "To the Bat Cave!"

Morgana stared at her (supposing she has a face). "The what?"

"Uh, to my place!" Aura dashed off to her trailer with Maha and Morgana following.

The director was left behind watching the little specks get smaller and smaller as they went farther. "Oh well. More food for me." He strolled to the snack table.

……

Ginkan and Kurim were already walking out of Aura's trailer before Aura left the building.

"We shouldn't have gone in there," Ginkan said. "What if Aura's really a reserved person who would be insulted by anyone violating her privacy?"

"Then…" Kurim whipped out the eraser again. "Take this!"

Ginkan had felt Kurim's movement and grabbed the eraser. He erased Kurim's hair, leaving the tall man bald.

"Ginkan!" Kurim tried to cover himself with his sleeves. "How could you! My hair's a powerful weapon!"

"And so's your chest. Big deal." Ginkan took a broom and broke of the bristles. With some difficulty he tied them around Kurim's head. "Good as new. It's as if you bleached it and then wrapped a band around your head."

"A sexy band?"

"Yes." The eyeless knight rolled his eyes.

Kurim examined himself in a reflective surface "Damn it, I don't look good with bleached hair!"

……

After a tedious time trying to stuff Ginkan into a dark closet (well, whether it was dark or not didn't really matter), Kurim headed for the kitchen in the Delta MA building. The snack tables always were stocked with the same things every day; he wanted some variety in his diet.

He smelled pie.

And there was Subaru in front of the oven, holding freshly baked white cherry pie.

Kurim was at her side in a blink's time. "Why hello, Subaru!" he greeted loudly, startling Subaru.

"What the hell happened to your hair?" she greeted back.

Kurim patted his broom wig. "Uh, I bleached it. Ya like?"

"Well, anything's an improvement for you."

"What's that pie for?"

Subaru put the hot pie down and waved at it. "It's for Tsukasa."

"I thought she was addicted to purple cherries."

"Yeah, but I figured that since she's doing so nicely with purple cherry withdrawal that she deserves a pastry."

"So you baked a white cherry pie."

"… sure!" She grinned.

Kurim didn't like the way she answered but let it go. "Can I have some pie?"

The grin immediately fled. "Of course not. Wait until Tsukasa gets the first piece."

The tall man didn't like the thought of that. "Oh come on," he tried to cajole sweetly, "just a crumb?"

"Sure." Subaru saw Kurim's smile. "There's some on the floor." She headed for the kitchen doors with the pie.

Kurim nearly blew up; at least judging from the smoke his 'bleached hair' was producing. "Hey hey!" He rushed her.

Kurim did manage to knock the pie out of her hands and also screamed 'NO!' and dived for the pastry.

Subaru poked his head. "Why are you still in slow motion?"

Kurim quickly studied his state of floating in midair. "For dramatic effect. This was entirely intentional for saving your falling pie."

"My pie's fine. I already got it."

Kurim (still floating in the diving position) saw that Subaru was holding the pie. He also saw that she had something else in the other. "Where did you get that pillow?"

Subaru lifted the fluffy 'n' soft thing. "Oh this? I guess it's a pillow. I quickly drew an elliptical shape under the pie to catch it without damaging it."

"Oh, that… explains…" Kurim scratched his head. "Wait, you drew it?"

"Yeah. Aura gave me a magic pencil for Christmas." Subaru held up a black pencil.

Kurim remained in his midair position wide-eyed. "Magic pencil!" He frantically grabbed for the wooden writing utensil though the effort was futile since Subaru easily kept it out of his reach. "Must… steal… without… her… knowing!" Kurim kept waving his hands around trying to get it. Subaru kept going towards the door. "Hey, Subaru, come back!" He observed his position in midair, apparently not going to move too far anytime soon. "Uh, a little help here? Please…?"

……

A couple of hours later Ginkan came into the kitchen.

"Kurim?" he poked Kurim's broom-wig'd head

Kurim raised his head. "Oh, hi." He hung his head back down. "Oh wow, I've moved five inches since Subaru left."

"Two hours ago?"

"Yeah." Something in Kurim's head clicked. He looked at Ginkan's new head now. "How did you get your head back!"

"Oh, Tsukasa drew it back in with Subaru's pencil. Tsukasa's not as bad as I once thought she was… before I knew she was a girl anyways."

"You madman!" Kurim stamped his feet on the ground and stood up. "This is Tsukasa we're talking about! The very guy… girl who has Subaru's heart! We still have to DESTROY TSUKASA."

"Uh, Kurim?"

"What?"

"If you were able to stand up and get out of the slow-motion midair syndrome, why didn't you do it before?"

That got Kurim thinking. "BeforeIwasinslowmotionforthesakeofsavingSubaru'spurplecherrypiebutthenitwasn'tsupposedtolasttwohoursbutrathermaybefivetotenminutesandapparentlyaftertryingtogetoutofitduringthosefivetotenminutesIfellasleepfortwohours—" He whipped out a whiteboard and put on glasses.

Another hour passed. Ginkan was getting bored with Kurim's lecture chock full of the theory of quantum grunties..

"You know…" Ginkan interrupted, "at this rate we're going to be late for the karaoke party." He stood up.
"What karaoke party!" Kurim erased the whiteboard with the magic eraser… essentially erasing the whiteboard itself.

"The one that we're going to be late for."

"Well let's go then!" Kurim dashed out the door and ran into Tsukasa, both falling over.

"Ow," Tsukasa stated. "Hey, Kurim, since when were you bald?"

"What?" Kurim felt his head. "ACK! MY BROOM WIG! I mean darn it the bleach must have eaten away at it… MY GOD MY HAIR!"

"No problems! Subaru let me play with this!" Tsukasa exclaimed. She whipped out Subaru's magic pencil and drew back Kurim's hair. "See?"

"Yeah missed my bangs."

"Sorry." She drew that in. "Now you're just as if you never lost your hair."

Kurim stared wide-eyed into a mirror that miraculously appeared in his hands. "I'm hot again! Well, hotter than when I had blond hair! I love you Tsukasa!" He glomped her, though after some time he realized the grave thing he did (grave for him anyways). He immediately let go and screamed, "Uh, PARTY!" and ran outside the building, leaving behind Ginkan and Tsukasa.

"Does Kurim even know where the party is?" Tsukasa asked.

"I dunno," Ginkan replied.

Tsukasa drew two large rectangles. Kurim popped out of one and into the other.

"What the heck is that?" Ginkan asked.

"I drew two portals, one that lead from where Kurim was and the other that leads to the North Pole."

"North… pole?"

……

Meanwhile, at the North Pole:

"OH MY GOD SANTA IS REAL!" Kurim screamed.

Santa stared at him. "I'm sure I am. Aren't you cold?"

"Yeah, a bit. But as along as I get the ladies I'm fine." Kurim looked around. "So where am I?"

"You're right on the North Pole."

"Really? Sweet. Is it just me or are the stars moving?"

"Apparently that's because you're directly on the north point of the Earth's turning axis."

"So if I were to stand on one foot and sing 'Yasashii Yoake' without falling over, I can beat Balmung at karaoke in talent AND skillz?"

"Sure…" An alarm sounded. "Crap, one of my penguins left the oven running."

"Penguins?" Kurim asked while trying to remain standing on one foot.

"Yeah, you see, people think I use elves for labor, but that's just wrong and inhumane. I use penguins and dodos."

"Aren't dodos extinct?"

"There's a reason why you don't seem them around anymore."

That took Kurim a while to figure.

……

Yeah, I did lessen the 'funny factor'. oo But for some reason I wanted some kind of plot… but plots are no fun, right?

Reviews are nice. :3