Dark Lords Episode 4 – Memories of Parents

Scene opens on Saruman break dancing in his Tye-Dye robes as the crowd chants, "Saruman! Saruman!" in hip hop rhythm.

Warious noticing the camera being on said above the chanting, "Welcome to another exciting episode of Dark Lords! I'm your host Darth Warious. Right now as you can see Saruman is break dancing for our audience. But today's subject is parents, or surrogate parents, which ever the case may be. Hey Saruman, time to settle down and get to business."

Reluctantly Saruman came back to his seat next to Darth Sidious and pouted.

Warious rolled her eyes and continued. "As I was saying, we are going to talk about what we remember of out 'parents' if any. I have tissues if you need them Vady."

"Don't call me 'Vady'."

"I think we'll start with Darth Sidious. Sidious, what do you remember about your parents?"

Darth Sidious sat back on the couch and thought for a moment. "I don't remember my parents, I remember my master though. I remember that he made me work without the force whenever I didn't do what he wanted. He was a good teacher, but I wouldn't consider him my 'parent'."

"Hey man," Saruman says patting Sidious on the back, "I know how you feel. I didn't have any parents. I was just there. The Valar made me and sent me to Middle-Earth looking like this."

"You haven't aged in 325 years?!" Tom Riddle asked surprised. "How do you do it?"

"I was made this way, that's how. And for any of you people out there who think I have the secret to immortality, I don't."

Tom looked depressed at this information.

"Anyway, the only person I could have called a parent would be Treebeard. Treebeard taught me many things about the forest and let me walk through his woods to enjoy the peace there. But then I became the Head of the White council and couldn't make it there anymore. And then I became Saruman of Many Colors, and you know the rest of the story from there."

There was a collective nod from around the Dark Lords and the audience.

"Well, it's time for a break we'll be back right after this."

The scene opens on Saruman, who had gone back to break dancing, and Darth Vader who is doing some insane rap.

"I am the one This is the one Rap it on up Rap it on down

Time to party Time to dance Rap'n all around See Saruman dance"

The audience in the back ground is going "whoo". Warious notices the cameras...

"And we're BACK PEOPLE!"

Vader and Saruman hurry back to their seats. Warious glares at them and continues, "Welcome back to Dark Lords. If you are just joining us, Saruman is not the subject of our show. We are talking about memories of our parents. And now...Yes Tom?"

"I want to say something about my parents."

"Okay, go ahead."

Voldemort took a deep breath then yelled, "I HATE MY MUGGLE FATHER! He left me alone with my weak mother and I hate them both! Not only that I am named after him, Tom Riddle! That is why I am to now be called Lord Voldemort!"

Stunned silence fills the crowd. This is the first time and of the Dark Lords has ever raised their voice.

Warious clears her voice and says, "So you would prefer us to call you Voldemort?"

Tom Riddle/Voldemort nodes his head and stares at the ground.

"Okay then. We won't call you by your father's name anymore. You should have told us earlier though."

Voldemort nods his head still looking at the floor.

"Right then, next is Sauron."

"My father is Melkor who is also known as Morgoth to the elves. I did what ever my Dad told me to do. But then the other Valar threw him into the abyss one day and left me in charge till he can return." Sauron/Jackson said.

"Does everyone here have something good to say about their parents?" Voldemort sneered.

"Hey!" protested Darth Sidious, "I didn't have a parent! So give it up already snake boy!"

Voldemort snarled and started to lunge at Sidious but Maul, Vader and Warious used the force to keep the wizard from their master.

"Control yourselves!" Warious commanded. "We will return to Dark Lords right after this."

"Welcome back to Dark Lords! I'm your host Darth Warious and as you can see I've managed to keep Saruman from going up and break dancing again! Let's get to business. Maul, tell us about your parents."

"Well, like Sidious, I never had parents. But I had a wonderful master who raised me and cared for me as I grew up under his care. Through Master Sidious, I've become a powerful Sith Lord and I want to thank him for taking time to raise me. Master Sidious, thank you."

"Awwwwww," the crowd says at the sentiment.

"And last but not least, Darth Vader."

"I remember my mommy, for the most part. Her name was Shimi Skywalker. She was always working hard to provide for us when I was little, before I went to become a Jedi. I didn't see her again for a whole ten years after that. When I did see her again...I had been having these dreams where she was hurt maybe even dying. Then I finally got to Tatooine and tracked her down to the Lars ranch. They told me she had been taken by Tuskin Raiders, the sand people. They're monsters! And I slaughtered them all like they were animals. I hate them!" At this point, Darth Vader could no longer speak and was crying.

Some members of the audience were crying silently too.

"It's okay Vader. It's alright. Well folks, our time up and we hope you have a good evening. Buh-bye!"

Warious: Please review and give me ideas!